Are you confident?

AmazingMan

Just a few questions to test the water

Would you ever approach a man or ask a man out?

Would you ever be prepared to wear risque clothes like a miniskirt or backless dress or whatever?

Would you be prepared to ask yout boss for a raise (if in job for a couple of years) or do you always wait until it's offered?

In a large group of well-educated people who are discussing a particular topic would you be able to get your opinion across and express yourself? (or perhaps you analyse too much what you have to say and fear it isn't "good" enough for the debate)

If you observe someone being bullied or criticised in a group scenario would you defend the person? (assuming the group is one that has value for you , i.e. friends or workmates and the person being attacked is new or has made some kind of silly error/comment, so the difficult thing here is standing up to the groupthink or going with the flow)

please be honest, my very opinion of you is at stake here

mods can move this if they so wish but I am interested in the disparity of answers between genders

Kimia

Yes to pretty much everything.

robbie_998

oh the desperateness is starting to shine through :pac:

Kimia

robbie_998 wrote: »

oh the desperateness is starting to shine through :pac:

What do you mean?

LadyE

Would you ever approach a man or ask a man out?

Yes, and have done.

Would you ever be prepared to wear risque clothes like a miniskirt or backless dress or whatever?

Yes

Would you be prepared to ask yout boss for a raise (if in job for a couple of years) or do you always wait until it's offered?

Yes, if I think its deserved I have done (and got it)

In a large group of well-educated people who are discussing a particular topic would you be able to get your opinion across and express yourself? (or perhaps you analyse too much what you have to say and fear it isn't "good" enough for the debate)

It depends on how much I know about the topic

If you observe someone being bullied or criticised in a group scenario would you defend the person? (assuming the group is one that has value for you , i.e. friends or workmates and the person being attacked is new or has made some kind of silly error/comment, so the difficult thing here is standing up to the groupthink or going with the flow)

I would, but not in an agressive tone or anything..mor ein an 2easy now, no need for that" kind of way.

please be honest, my very opinion of you is at stake here

I hope I passed, your opinion is SO SO important to me, please let me know soon so I can sleep tonight :rolleyes:



^^^

Elba101

AmazingMan wrote: »

Just a few questions to test the water

Would you ever approach a man or ask a man out?

Would you ever be prepared to wear risque clothes like a miniskirt or backless dress or whatever?

Would you be prepared to ask yout boss for a raise (if in job for a couple of years) or do you always wait until it's offered?

In a large group of well-educated people who are discussing a particular topic would you be able to get your opinion across and express yourself? (or perhaps you analyse too much what you have to say and fear it isn't "good" enough for the debate)

If you observe someone being bullied or criticised in a group scenario would you defend the person? (assuming the group is one that has value for you , i.e. friends or workmates and the person being attacked is new or has made some kind of silly error/comment, so the difficult thing here is standing up to the groupthink or going with the flow)

please be honest, my very opinion of you is at stake here

mods can move this if they so wish but I am interested in the disparity of answers between genders

If i knew he would say yes, then absolutely!:D

If i'm comfortable in it, i'll wear it

If i deserved a raise, of course i'd ask.

I'm not one to keep quite

and of course i would!

Sinall

I have asked a guy out.

I have worn risque clothes.

I have asked for a raise - and challenged the one that was offered. Obviously this was in the glory days and before pay cuts!

I think I am quite good at getting my opinion across. I think this has developed over time, especially expressing my opinion in a professional sense.

I hate to see people bullied/criticised by a group. Would always stand up for people quite passionately in these circumstances.

I think confidence, for me, has been built with time.

Nervous Wreck

AmazingMan wrote: »

Would you ever approach a man or ask a man out?

Would you ever be prepared to wear risque clothes like a miniskirt or backless dress or whatever?

I'm pretty confident but... I don't think I'd do either of these things.

AmazingMan wrote: »

Would you be prepared to ask yout boss for a raise (if in job for a couple of years) or do you always wait until it's offered?

I've only ever asked for a raise once. I literally said "Can I get more money?" I got a raise and a promotion from that day.

AmazingMan wrote: »

In a large group of well-educated people who are discussing a particular topic would you be able to get your opinion across and express yourself? (or perhaps you analyse too much what you have to say and fear it isn't "good" enough for the debate)

As long as I'm interested in the topic, def.

AmazingMan wrote: »

If you observe someone being bullied or criticised in a group scenario would you defend the person? (assuming the group is one that has value for you , i.e. friends or workmates and the person being attacked is new or has made some kind of silly error/comment, so the difficult thing here is standing up to the groupthink or going with the flow)

Always.

AmazingMan

AmazingMan wrote: »

Just a few questions to test the water

Would you ever approach a man or ask a man out?
Yes.

Would you ever be prepared to wear risque clothes like a miniskirt or backless dress or whatever?
Er...only in a tastefull way. I wear miniskirts all the time but only because I like them, not to show off my legs.

Would you be prepared to ask yout boss for a raise (if in job for a couple of years) or do you always wait until it's offered?
Yes!

In a large group of well-educated people who are discussing a particular topic would you be able to get your opinion across and express yourself? (or perhaps you analyse too much what you have to say and fear it isn't "good" enough for the debate)
Yes

If you observe someone being bullied or criticised in a group scenario would you defend the person? (assuming the group is one that has value for you , i.e. friends or workmates and the person being attacked is new or has made some kind of silly error/comment, so the difficult thing here is standing up to the groupthink or going with the flow)
Always.

please be honest, my very opinion of you is at stake here

mods can move this if they so wish but I am interested in the disparity of answers between genders

Meh. Apparently I come across as being very confident but in other ways I'm not confident at all. I'm great at dealing with people, social situations and all that. That's about it really.

neuro-praxis

If you observe someone being bullied or criticised in a group scenario would you defend the person? (assuming the group is one that has value for you , i.e. friends or workmates and the person being attacked is new or has made some kind of silly error/comment, so the difficult thing here is standing up to the groupthink or going with the flow)

I find it difficult to believe any of you that have replied yes to this. My experience since dot has been that when you defend someone, you stand alone.

princess-lala

Yes to everything

Edit: Just noticed your last line op - Im confident enough not to give a fcuk what people think of me!!

Sinall

neuro-praxis wrote: »

I find it difficult to believe any of you that have replied yes to this. My experience since dot has been that when you defend someone, you stand alone.

That is sometimes true. I don't mind standing alone though, especially if I am standing up for something or someone I believe in.

Also, if you stand up for someone, sometimes others will too.

Censorsh!t

Hmmm I would have to say "no" to the majority of these, if not all.

I'm quite self conscious and not confident in myself.

I'd be way too scared to ask a guy out, I'm not sure why, I'm just not very good with people. I find it hard to make friends in general, so this would be even harder.

I just about wear dresses for special occasions, but i wouldn't ever wear something risque.

I can't imagien myself asking for a raise.

I'm not good at getting my opinion across in a lot of areas. I usually will only chance it, if i know a lot about the subject...otherwise I'm just too scared to raise my voice

If I saw someone being bullied...it really depends here on the person, and the intentions of the people being mean. If it was very light hearted, i wouldnt step in...but if it was more sinister I probably would

Would you ever approach a man or ask a man out?

Yes - have done

Would you ever be prepared to wear risque clothes like a miniskirt or backless dress or whatever?

Yes - have done ( I wouldn't call a short skirt or backless dress risque mind you)

Would you be prepared to ask yout boss for a raise (if in job for a couple of years) or do you always wait until it's offered?

Not sure right now but have done in the past and got it

In a large group of well-educated people who are discussing a particular topic would you be able to get your opinion across and express yourself? (or perhaps you analyse too much what you have to say and fear it isn't "good" enough for the debate)

Of course, I respect mine and everyone elses opinion

If you observe someone being bullied or criticised in a group scenario would you defend the person? (assuming the group is one that has value for you , i.e. friends or workmates and the person being attacked is new or has made some kind of silly error/comment, so the difficult thing here is standing up to the groupthink or going with the flow)

Too Right


please be honest, my very opinion of you is at stake here

Like me......please like me!!!

[/QUOTE]

Madame Razz

Would you ever approach a man or ask a man out?

No and No.

Would you ever be prepared to wear risque clothes like a miniskirt or backless dress or whatever?

Depends on the shape I'm in tbh(which can fluctuate by a few pounds thruout the year; nothing major but I get conscious:o).

Would you be prepared to ask yout boss for a raise (if in job for a couple of years) or do you always wait until it's offered?

Depends on the job and the workload that is expected of me.

In a large group of well-educated people who are discussing a particular topic would you be able to get your opinion across and express yourself? (or perhaps you analyse too much what you have to say and fear it isn't "good" enough for the debate)

If I knew something of the topic then yes.

If you observe someone being bullied or criticised in a group scenario would you defend the person? (assuming the group is one that has value for you , i.e. friends or workmates and the person being attacked is new or has made some kind of silly error/comment, so the difficult thing here is standing up to the groupthink or going with the flow)

Yes.

Lia_lia wrote: »

Meh. Apparently I come across as being very confident but in other ways I'm not confident at all. I'm great at dealing with people, social situations and all that. That's about it really.

+1; really not all that confident when it comes down to it; which actually surprises people as it seems that way on the surface. Quite insecure in many ways tbh:o

Wibbs

neuro-praxis wrote: »

I find it difficult to believe any of you that have replied yes to this. My experience since dot has been that when you defend someone, you stand alone.

Wouldnt worry me TBH. Standing alone often means you're just not one of the sheep. In the case of bullying I could give two **** what others think. Only what I think.

Nervous Wreck

Agreed. Over the years, I've taken my beatings, verbal and physical, suffered some consequences and lost some close friends, all by standing up for someone that's being wrongfully put down or bullied. But I'd hate myself if I didn't step in.

neuro-praxis

Wibbs wrote: »

Wouldnt worry me TBH. Standing alone often means you're just not one of the sheep. In the case of bullying I could give two **** what others think. Only what I think.

I don't think you understand what I mean. What I mean is I have been defending people since the playground and nobody has ever joined me. People who stand up for what is right are in my experience extremely few and far between. And yet everyone here declares that they would always stand up for an individual who was being picked on.

You even see it on boards. Someone says something silly, and a barrage of posters comes down on them like a ton of bricks, and anyone who defends them is ridiculed too.

Edit: Thinking more about this, whether it's small things or large, people in general prefer to keep the head down. A few weeks back me and my husband intervened in a fight on the street where three men were kicking the **** out of a guy on the street who had been stripped half naked. We got him and his girlfriend home, called the police etc. etc. This was on a busy street and scores of people had passed by first. This is one of quite literally dozens of similar experiences I could list.

jenny2hat

I'm shy

AmazingMan wrote: »

Just a few questions to test the water

Would you ever approach a man or ask a man out?
I might... but probably not.
Would you ever be prepared to wear risque clothes like a miniskirt or backless dress or whatever?
Yeah, I'd wear whatever I thought looks good.

Would you be prepared to ask yout boss for a raise (if in job for a couple of years) or do you always wait until it's offered?
I'd ask I think

In a large group of well-educated people who are discussing a particular topic would you be able to get your opinion across and express yourself? (or perhaps you analyse too much what you have to say and fear it isn't "good" enough for the debate)
Nah wouldn't really have much of a problem with that

If you observe someone being bullied or criticised in a group scenario would you defend the person? (assuming the group is one that has value for you , i.e. friends or workmates and the person being attacked is new or has made some kind of silly error/comment, so the difficult thing here is standing up to the groupthink or going with the flow)
I wouldn't take on a whole load of people by myself, that'd be dumb. I would get help and try to help as much as I could though.

please be honest, my very opinion of you is at stake here

mods can move this if they so wish but I am interested in the disparity of answers between genders

Wibbs

neuro-praxis wrote: »

I don't think you understand what I mean. What I mean is I have been defending people since the playground and nobody has ever joined me.

So? I mean that BTW.

People who stand up for what is right are in my experience extremely few and far between

True enough. Funny I was reading a book about those who do stand up in times of real danger and the one thing that stood out was that they were the unusual ones. They were also the ones who were condsidered troublemakers in everyday normal life. I think that's OK in a way. Most go with the flow and in easy times, those who dont stick out and not always in a good way. It's a timing issue more than anything else IMHO

You even see it on boards. Someone says something silly, and a barrage of posters comes down on them like a ton of bricks, and anyone who defends them is ridiculed too.

Yep the sheep mentality. But in everyday life thats an OK thing. The outliers are usually only useful when shíte hits the fan.

Edit: Thinking more about this, whether it's small things or large, people in general prefer to keep the head down.

Agreed and if you dont that's looke on as weird a lot of the time.

A few weeks back me and my husband intervened in a fight on the street where three men were kicking the **** out of a guy on the street who had been stripped half naked. We got him and his girlfriend home, called the police etc. etc. This was on a busy street and scores of people had passed by first. This is one of quite literally dozens of similar experiences I could list.

Ditto, but dont you pair stop. One day it may be seen for what it is.

Snowie

We all have confidance were all born with it. But the past does affect the future, situations and how you react.

Some of us just lack the nesscerey skills to over lap the pasts affect. I know I did.

I would say real confidance is held with in your ability to retain your emotions and be more or less a blank peace of paper in some case's. Not allow your self to get riled up buy people or your own emotions or negitive critics the kinda critic that tells you, you can't do that....

People who say Im not confident, well to be honest i hold a bigger sin the insest simply because your knocking your self down. People say it when they shouldn't, people should understand the past is not the future tho if you live from your past your future will always be similer...