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Good Shepherd Convent Dunboyne

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Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 33 junemay


    I was there for 5/ 6 months 1976-77. Don't remember a Sr. Cait. In that time there was only one baby at the home. The day I arrived, after my mother left, I was taken to the church to say a prayer, then upstairs to the nursery. I spent a few hours with a mother and her new baby of a few days old. She desperately wanted to keep him but had nowhere to go. She and her baby were gone two days later, I don't know if she kept him. Other than her, most of the mothers left their babies in Holles Street once they were discharged, from where they went to a foster home and quickly adopted. There was really no encouragement or support for any of us who wanted to keep our babies.


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 teddybug


    hi i too was in de home in dunboyne 29 yr ago ,i had a daughter adopted and still havent met her , we have been in contact by writing some letters but she says she is not ready 2 meet yet and i respeoct her decision . But i have lovely photos of her as she is now ..BuT i made a scrapbook out of everything i had relating to her birth and any letters from social workers tellin me how she was growing for the first few yrs of her life .an yway i often think of all de girls who were there with me ?? i would love to hear from any girls who were there in 1983 from april to august please


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 teddybug


    dogs name was jacko


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 survived


    Hi ive just come across this site while googeling dunboyne i was there from sept 1980 to jan 1981 if anyone was there at that time id love to hear from you things get confused in my head . I have gone back there 2 yrs ago final step in my councelling and a lot of ghosts came rushing back. anyone remember putting greetin cards into wrappers or cellophane ?


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 survived


    cant rem the dog at all


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  • Registered Users Posts: 8 Nellan


    Hi just saw this post. I was there Sept 1980 to Jan 1981. Used to be in touch with one girl for years but with alot of moving around over the years after lost her contact details. Patsy was her 'Dunboyne' name & she was a lovely person. Can't remember the name I was given!!!!! I met alot of nice girls during my time there and remember going for long walks in the afternoons around the area with a bunch. It was a very sad situation for alot of us but I was really glad of somewhere to hide away from all the hassle with families etc etc


  • Registered Users Posts: 5 Roland9


    Hi,
    It's strange how the mind works. I am in work and suddenly I'm on this site and on this thread. My mother was pregnant with me in Dunboyne for several months until April 1976. She was unmarried and sent there by her parents because of the shame (hard to imagine now). My birth father found a sudden desire to visit England and not come back. My mother gave birth to me in Holles Street. I was due to be given up for adoption but something happened, I was kept. My mother doesn't talk about that time, some things she has mentioned have been echoed by other comments from posters. She is not doing so well now, she has trouble dealing (or not dealing) with her emotions. Her family were not particularly caring to her, though her parents were good to me. She won't go to counselling. I would like to hear other accounts of peoples time there. It might help me get through to her. I don't think that everything that happened in Dunboyne was just circumstance.


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 survived


    I also was friendly with patsy my name was patricia we also must have known each other i will pm you if i can get the hang of this


  • Registered Users Posts: 8 Nellan


    Not sure if any of my messages are going, this is not as straightforward to use as I hoped!! Did you stay in touch with Patsy after you left Dunboyne?? I was gutted to lose contact with her when I did.


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 survived


    hi nellen I met her many years later the whole experience unfortunately still scarred her very badly ...long story we sadly have not been in touch for many years


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  • Registered Users Posts: 29 survived


    hi roland9 so sorry to hear about your mam unfortunately places like dunboyne leave lasting scars im sure each of us have different memories and different scars, some things which we could not talk openely to anyone about. Stripping us of our real names , being brainwashed not to get close or share information with the others girls and most importantly being reminded constantly why you were there and the pain you were causing your family and how unworthy u are leaves an everlasting effect on the way you think throughout life . I spent many years in councelling but there are some things you just never work through . Its like your conditioned for life.Have you ever suggested going to dunboyne casle for coffee or a walk maybe that might help but be careful it could also stir up a lot of memories she may not be able to deal with.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1 2808


    I was born in December 1971 and given up for adoption six weeks later from the Good Shepard, Dunboyne. I had great adoptive parents but sadly they are both deceased many years now. I never looked for my birth mother because I felt if she wanted to find me that she would be looking for me. Reading these posts has made me realise that maybe things aren't as simple as that.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8 Nellan


    I am very sorry to hear she was not so good when last you saw her. She was a lovely person & a great support to me while I was in Dunboyne, especially the night I went into labour.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3 Jackeen68


    Zosk wrote: »
    Hi I have just come accross this while googling the good shepherd convent dunboyne because I was there in 1987 my son is 25 and still a big part of my life thank God.

    Hi Zosk! I just came across this thread and it has tears streaming down my face. I was at Ard Mhuire from 1986 until March 1987. Were you there then? I slept in the "Blue" room. I can't remember the name they gave me but my real name is Sandra. Would love to connect with others who were there at same time.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3 Jackeen68


    survived wrote: »
    Hi ive just come across this site while googeling dunboyne i was there from sept 1980 to jan 1981 if anyone was there at that time id love to hear from you things get confused in my head . I have gone back there 2 yrs ago final step in my councelling and a lot of ghosts came rushing back. anyone remember putting greetin cards into wrappers or cellophane ?

    I remember stuffing envelopes!!! Also remember working in kitchen. I was there 86/87. Kudos to going back 2 yrs ago. I didn't know it was converted into a hotel and i burst into tears when i saw a picture of the front of the building. 5* hotel! I wonder if they know the sorrow in the walls?


  • Registered Users Posts: 3 Jackeen68


    Does anyone remember Fr. George Aggar who would come once a month to say Mass and hear confessions? He was so sweet and kind. I kept in touch with him for a few years after but then he left for a mission in Africa and we lost touch.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1 seantaximan


    hi everyone my girlfriend went in to dunboyne nov 83 out in mar 84 her family put her in there told everyone she went to boarding school .i always felt i let her down but not a thing i could do . used to travel up every 2 wks just watching adoption story's and wondering ware do i start looking he (my son) born on the 1 of march 1984. its time to open the pandora's box. john


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 teddybug


    survived wrote: »
    Hi ive just come across this site while googeling dunboyne i was there from sept 1980 to jan 1981 if anyone was there at that time id love to hear from you things get confused in my head . I have gone back there 2 yrs ago final step in my councelling and a lot of ghosts came rushing back. anyone remember putting greetin cards into wrappers or cellophane ?

    lucky you gettin councelling , i was not offered any , i was there in 1983 . gave my baby up , still havent met her . i had 3 other children , but never could hold down a relationship . I think i could benifit from councelling and i am planning 2 go bak 2 dunboyne soon . i never knew it was a hotel .. anyway i wish you well 4 de future


  • Registered Users Posts: 33 junemay


    Hi Survived, I was there a few years before you, don't remember stuffing envelopes. I was still at school and teachers came in an hour a week for each subject. It passed the time a bit. We were also supposed to knit baby clothes, hated knitting, never finished one thing. Did you find it helpful to return to dunboyne? In 36 years I have never spoken to anyone about my time there. Now in middle age it's more on my mind for some reason,but still can't open up about it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 33 junemay


    as a first step look at www.adoptionrightalliance.com and click on search and reunion. good luck


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  • Registered Users Posts: 33 junemay


    sorry, that should be www.adoptionrightsalliance.com


  • Registered Users Posts: 33 junemay


    Roland9 wrote: »
    Hi,
    It's strange how the mind works. I am in work and suddenly I'm on this site and on this thread. My mother was pregnant with me in Dunboyne for several months until April 1976. She was unmarried and sent there by her parents because of the shame (hard to imagine now). My birth father found a sudden desire to visit England and not come back. My mother gave birth to me in Holles Street. I was due to be given up for adoption but something happened, I was kept. My mother doesn't talk about that time, some things she has mentioned have been echoed by other comments from posters. She is not doing so well now, she has trouble dealing (or not dealing) with her emotions. Her family were not particularly caring to her, though her parents were good to me. She won't go to counselling. I would like to hear other accounts of peoples time there. It might help me get through to her. I don't think that everything that happened in Dunboyne was just circumstance.
    Hi Roland9
    I was in Dunboyne within a few months of your mother leaving. Like her, I don't talk about it. We were not abused or badly treated but the overriding feeling was one of shame, guilt and fear. Fear of being 'found out' and the terrible consequences of that. The attitude from the nuns was you have a done a shameful thing in getting pregnant, the only good thing is to give your baby up for adoption, return to your life and never talk about it again. My parents brought up my son and the nuns said they were ruining his life and mine by not having him adopted. Added to that was the sadness for many of us that the man they thought loved them had left them to cope alone. I felt guilty for causing stress to my family and worthless as a person. My son is wonderful and has been a joy to me as have my other children, but the feelings of shame have never really left.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3 vinosol


    Hi , i remember the work down at the back of the convent putting cards into cellophane..also the kindness of the taxi driver Ger Kelly, his was the only name i can remember and Sr. Ambrose...she too was kind.


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 survived


    hi junemay .
    I found my trip to dunboyne castle very overwhelming i had a lot of flashbacks it was all surreal things and memories you have in your head get shifted around. we walked around the hotel. and there were a lot of doors that said strictly private no entry but without thinking we opened the doors and they brought us to parts of the home( not the posh part where the visitors seen ) the stairs at the back seemed so narrow it was all very weird . what was more weird was the fact that no security gaurd came after us and there were cameras everywhere !!! Since being there last year ive found im a little bit more at peace. Unfortunately adoption stories on telly and the madelene laundry report is stirring up a lot for me as im sure it is for everyone. Unlike you i always felt we were very badly treated and the scars stayed with me for life even after many years of councelling.


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 survived


    vinosol wrote: »
    Hi , i remember the work down at the back of the convent putting cards into cellophane..also the kindness of the taxi driver Ger Kelly, his was the only name i can remember and Sr. Ambrose...she too was kind.
    I cannot remember the taxi driver or maybe i didnt have the same 1 and i get all the nuns mixed up


  • Registered Users Posts: 32 Enda63


    I've been back to Dunboyne a few times, once before it became a hotel and since it changed. I still HATE the place!! I remember packing the cards, we were packing "to the happy parents on the birth of your child" when I was there. I spent my nights in the smoking room, didn't really bother with the tv room. the nuns were mostly ok, liked Ambrose, hated Clare. was there twice, as a baby I was there for 9 months, and returned in 1981 (oct to dec). would LOVE to know what happened the rest of the gang I was there with, still in touch with one. if anyone here is on Facebook, adoption rights alliance have a page there and it's great for support and keeping in touch about stuff that's going on.


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 teddybug


    rem packin cards but dont rem wat was on em ,, rem goin 2 de limetree pub 4 1 or 2 glasses beer .. i didnt mind it there cause i was brought up in good shepherd convent childrens home waterford so was used 2 these type of places .. i never got councellin wen i left ..i wish i had though ...


  • Registered Users Posts: 33 junemay


    survived wrote: »
    hi junemay .
    I found my trip to dunboyne castle very overwhelming i had a lot of flashbacks it was all surreal things and memories you have in your head get shifted around. we walked around the hotel. and there were a lot of doors that said strictly private no entry but without thinking we opened the doors and they brought us to parts of the home( not the posh part where the visitors seen ) the stairs at the back seemed so narrow it was all very weird . what was more weird was the fact that no security gaurd came after us and there were cameras everywhere !!! Since being there last year ive found im a little bit more at peace. Unfortunately adoption stories on telly and the madelene laundry report is stirring up a lot for me as im sure it is for everyone. Unlike you i always felt we were very badly treated and the scars stayed with me for life even after many years of councelling.
    Hi survived
    thanks for replying. I will try and make a trip back this year, although the thought scares me.


  • Registered Users Posts: 29 teddybug


    would love 2 hear from any girls who were in ard mhuire dunboyne btween may and aug 1983 espically bernie and catherine and maryann , i would love 2 hear how your last 29 yrs have been ... you will know who u are if u remember Father kerian who used take us into dublin 4 walk abouts ???????


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  • Registered Users Posts: 5 ilovemyweedogs


    I rember so much was there in jan to april 83 we had to clean up after nuns breky never for get that porig pot as long as i live
    He died a few years ago, quite a sad death really as he had Alzheimers and Parkinsons but he and his wife were an aunt and uncle that I was really close to, almost like another mum and dad. I used to go on my "holidays" to their house in Dunboyne and thought I was in clover as I got away from my brother and sisters and got to do fun stuff like to to bingo (:o the expectations of kids on their holidays all those years ago eh?).
    I often think about them both and remember him talking about the convent and the girls there and taking them to the hospital for appointments and other such things. I never understood what was happening in the convent (good ol' Ireland back then, such things were never openly discussed and the damage that caused:() but remember the tone he and my aunt spoke in was always one of gentleness and kindness. Maybe this was because they had adopted two girls themselves as they were unable to have children I don't know. I just really do hope that he was nice to everyone :)


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