Motivation / Willpower??

dubsgirl

Hi All

What motivates you to lose weight?
How do you keep your willpower up?

Let me just say i am failing badly :rolleyes: I keep starting to eat healthy and within a couple of days I'm falling off the wagon. I am doing this years!!

Anyone any insight? Has anyone else on here faced the same problem?
Is there any tips or tricks you think could help? I realise to a lot of people this all sounds ridiculous ie. there are no tips and tricks "just use more calories than you consume" easy yeah??

But seriously at this stage I could give weight watchers classes but just can't seem to keep it up.

Be as blunt as you like folks :pac:

peepeep

Maybe this isn't the right answer, but personally my motivation to keep exercising and eating healthily is the sight of fat people - be it on tv, or in the shops or wherever. I don't want to be fat, I don't want to be a big unhappy lump, so I eat well and I run 5k a few times a week. The idea of being fat repulses me, and that's my motivation to look after myself. I'm just being blunt, as the OP asked!

EileenG

Putting on jeans and finding they are tight. Seeing fat people always makes me suck in my gut and try not to look like that. In the gym, I like looking at aspirational pix, or even other gym users who look good, but out and about, it's more about how I don't want to look.

all_smilz

I am overweight and I am disgusted to think that people are so judgemental.

thinking that people would judge me as being a disgusting lump has kept me out of the gym for years.

Blunt is fine, Cruel is another story!

AARRRGH

I don't have a weight problem, but I do have a terrible caffeine addiction.

The only thing that works for me is repeatedly reading what caffeine does to your body (i.e. terrible things) which makes me disgusted at the thought of having a coffee.

So if you have a weakness for something, e.g. Coke, find out what it is doing to your body and see if that'll help you stay away from it.

EileenG

It's not the people in the gym that I'm talking about, it's the ones doing the supersize meals in McDonalds. Anyone who goes to the gym, no matter what their size or what they are doing there, deserved respect.

dubsgirl

To be fair I think these are valid points, I did ask people to be blunt. Strangely enough I believe the bluntness of these replies will help.
There is a reason some people manage their weight and fitness and by discussing this with all types of people (fat and skinny) I believe this can only help me.

Thanks for everybodies input so far

AARRRGH

In my experience, most (all) obese people I have met have had emotional problems. So if you're obese, going to a psychotherapist would probably help...

Worst case scenario it doesn't work, but it's worth a shot.

callig

all_smilz wrote: »

I am overweight and I am disgusted to think that people are so judgemental.

thinking that people would judge me as being a disgusting lump has kept me out of the gym for years.

Blunt is fine, Cruel is another story!

hi

I don't think people were judging you. Some people are happy regardless of what they weigh others can't be happy unless they are a certain weight. It doesn't mean their negative thoughts are about you, that's just how they would view themselves if they were overweight. I hope that makes sense to you.

kind regards

Macha

I prefer to use positive imagery so i have a pair of jeans I barely fit into and imagine myself fitting into them for the Christmas party run in December.

I find the key, as with changing any behaviour is to get into the habit of bringing up the image at the time when someone is offering you a croissant or the dessert menu is being passed around. No good doing it after the fact!

EileenG

Kind of scary. Saw a bit of the Two Ronnies this morning and Ronnie Barker was in a blue lycra mini dress, doing an exercise routine with skittles. The scary thing was, I've seen tons of women out shopping with exactly the same body shape, in very similar outfits.

metamorphosis

Like Eileen said - there is not a feeling worse than puting on jeans to realise they have gotten tight on you. That alone always cops me on

emeraldstar

peepeep wrote: »

Maybe this isn't the right answer, but personally my motivation to keep exercising and eating healthily is the sight of fat people - be it on tv, or in the shops or wherever. I don't want to be fat, I don't want to be a big unhappy lump, so I eat well and I run 5k a few times a week. The idea of being fat repulses me, and that's my motivation to look after myself. I'm just being blunt, as the OP asked!

Exact same for me - and also the sight of lovely slim people. I don't find I need motivation or will power per se; the desire not to be fat is drive enough.

peepeep

I agree with what Eileen said (as I usually do) - I have tons of respect for overweight people who are in the gym or out walking or running. They are inspiring. The kind of people who motivate me to stay thin are the fat people who bemoan their weight gain whilst simultaneously stuffing their faces with junk.

journey

Hi dubsgirl,
You sound so like me. I must have joined Weightwatchers about 12 times over the years, would drop a stone or so and then lose all motivation. This time it's been different. I've been going for the last 18 weeks religiously (never stuck to it this long before), and I am 100% certain that this is the time I'm going to get to goal and stay there.

Reasons it's been different this time?
I had an epiphany last June. I was sick of people taking me for granted and was talking to a friend about it one night. It turned into a bit of a counselling session and I realised that I was the worst culprit for taking myself for granted. I treated myself like crap, filling my body with crap food and not exercising. Something clicked and I decided that if I wanted people to stop taking me for granted, then I had to stop letting them, by showing them that I was making myself a priority. So I joined Weightwatchers for the last time and so far I'm down 25.5lbs with just 16.5lbs left to my own personal goal.

I also set myself loads of mini goals to keep me motivated along the way and treated myself with a non food treat every time I got there (e.g. new haircut, new top, facial etc.)

The other thing I did was to get serious about exercise. I decided to start running. I was one of the most unfit people I know. I couldn't run to the top of the stairs without passing out, but I decided that I was going to set myself a goal of running 10km without stopping. Tomorrow I'm doing a 10km race and plan to reach that goal! The great thing about running is it's really addictive once you get into it. And I also find that if I go out for a run I'm less likely to eat crap food because I realise how difficult it is to burn it off with exercise.

Jwacqui

For me personally there have been a few things that have given me more motivation.

The number one thing was finally admitting to myself that at over 17stone I was severely overweight and was never going to be completely happy with my weight. Like yourself I have been a member of weightwatchers numerous times but it only finally clicked and started working when I realised that ww was the key for me. If I left I would be back a year later heavier and more unhappy. It was going to never ending. If I stuck with it I was going to get where I wanted. Even if I went to ww for a year and only lost 7lb it would be better than not going at all and being up 3stone which happened to me previously.

My progress also motivates me greatly, in the last year I am down 3st 7.5lb. I want to lose another three and a half stone but I focus on what I have done not how far I have to go.
When I started I made out an A4 sheet of 27goals. Some of them are 2lb, some are 5lb. When I reach them I tick them off and write the date. When I get demotivated I look at this.

Trying on old clothes that are now 3sizes too big gives me a great kick! Really makes me appreaciate how far I have come.

Other people also give me great motivation. Friends that are doing WW or other people on here that are doing well. If other people
can do it I can aswell. Also I have a little competitive streak which also keeps me going! :rolleyes:

I find keeping an account of your food also helps. With weightwatchers tracking is key!! But I find the food diary in here a great help!

Keep people that are positive and encouraging around you! I have loads of friends that help me out so much! They tell me how well I am doing and give me so much motivation.

I find for me having one day a week where I do not watch what I eat keeps me sane. For me this day is tuesday after my weigh-in. I let myself have what I want. I do not count or worry about anything that goes in my mouth! It keeps me sane and if I am having a day where I want something bad, I think about tuesday when can eat it! Sometimes I don't even want it on tuesday. But it gets me through!

Like other people have said other overweight people can motivate me. I don't look at them in a disapproving way or look down on them. I am still overweight myself and previously being 17stone was in there postion. But as I am young (21) looking at older people that are overweight makes me think that I don't want to live my life that way. It just gives me that extra push sometimes!

Hope some of that helps!

Khannie

Motivation for me is easy: I have to make weight for competition. But.....I have found lots of things that make it easier to lose weight. Here are some of them.


1) Don't buy crap. This is the biggest thing you can do IMO. If I open the fridge and there's a kit kat in there poking me in the eye, I'm bloody well going to eat it. Same with the garlic bread on the table with my dinner. If it's poking me in the eye, it's going in my tum tum. If it's not there, I wont miss it.
2) Keep a food diary. This is really simple but unbelievably effective.
3) Allow yourself some treats without feeling guilty. Even when I'm pushing really hard to make weight, I'll still have a biscuit with my coffee. Why? because I'd go mental without some kind of occasional treat.
4) Make gradual changes. Trying to go from eating lots of rubbish to a 100% clean diet is a recipe for failure IMO. Cut out one thing a week and replace it with something better. After 10 weeks you wont want to eat half the crap you used to love.
5) Sugar free jelly. Holy crap this stuff is a winner. I've a real sweet tooth. Love something after dinner. Sugar free jelly is basically calorie free.
6) Don't expect (or even aim for) overnight success. Weight takes time to go on, and time to come off.
7) Aim for lifestyle changes. This ties in with the gradual change kind of thing, but if you feel like you're going on a diet, it becomes easy to fall off the wagon and go back to what you consider "normal". If what you consider "normal" is healthy eating, and aim to get there, I think that helps a bit with the mindset. Feeling like your on a diet is rotten. Feeling like you're eating yourself healthy is very positive.

Hope that helps somewhat. Good luck with it.

dubsgirl

wow!!

Seriously to all of you that have made such great suggestions and taken the time out to respond with such articulation Thank You!!

Some brilliant advice on here..

Now one of my motivations will be to come on here and read this thread

Thanks to everyone.

El_Dangeroso

AARRRGH wrote: »

In my experience, most (all) obese people I have met have had emotional problems. So if you're obese, going to a psychotherapist would probably help...

Sorry to contradict but you are confusing association with cause and effect. The truth is that a lot of people have emotional problems, if those people are also overweight that is automatically assumed to be the cause. Most people who are obese did not get that way through emotional problems, in fact I would say that an improper diet is most likely cause of both issues, the weight and depression. A(obesity) and B(emotional disorders) exist, that doesn't me that A causes B, equally C(diet) could cause A and B.

On topic, you can only lose weight for you and this needs to be based on reasons completely personal to you. I find it useful to draw up a list of stakes for why you are losing weight and post them where you can see them so you can be reminded of them everyday.

MyPeopleDrankTheSoup

Well, you're female so my tips mightn't help you as much as they're practically all related to scoring women but here they are anyway.

1) Reading news reports of how the obesity rates are flying up in Ireland and across the western world. Means when I get in real good shape, I'll stand out even more with the ladies!
2) My penis will appear bigger with low BF! Yeah, that one definitely doesn't relate to you.
3) Walking past fast food restaurants and thinking I'm somehow 'better' than all the fat fcuks inside because I have self discipline! Yeah, that one makes me sound like a wnaker but it works.
4) Going to bed at night after calorie counting and knowing you hit the 500 deficit again and so you inched one step closer to your goals today, job done. You might have done nothing at work but at least you were somewhat productive.
5) When it's my next birthday, hoping that I'll be in good shape and be able to look back on the year as progress.
6) Looking at photos of the fat, ugly women I managed to score when I was really out of shape and saying to myself... never again!

Yep, this post makes me look very bad but I'm being honest and it works for motivation.

El_Dangeroso

georgiecasey wrote: »

Well, you're female so my tips mightn't help you as much as they're practically all related to scoring women but here they are anyway.

1) Reading news reports of how the obesity rates are flying up in Ireland and across the western world. Means when I get in real good shape, I'll stand out even more with the ladies!
2) My penis will appear bigger with low BF! Yeah, that one definitely doesn't relate to you.
3) Walking past fast food restaurants and thinking I'm somehow 'better' than all the fat fcuks inside because I have self discipline! Yeah, that one makes me sound like a wnaker but it works.
4) Going to bed at night after calorie counting and knowing you hit the 500 deficit again and so you inched one step closer to your goals today, job done. You might have done nothing at work but at least you were somewhat productive.
5) When it's my next birthday, hoping that I'll be in good shape and be able to look back on the year as progress.
6) Looking at photos of the fat, ugly women I managed to score when I was really out of shape and saying to myself... never again!

Yep, this post makes me look very bad but I'm being honest and it works for motivation.

:eek:

Jwacqui

georgiecasey wrote: »

6) Looking at photos of the fat, ugly women I managed to score when I was really out of shape and saying to myself... never again!

Seriously? I managed to ignore some of the others but try having some sort of respect. I don't think any woman should ever be referred to as "fat" or "ugly"

EileenG

georgiecasey wrote: »

6) Looking at photos of the fat, ugly women I managed to score when I was really out of shape and saying to myself... never again!

Yep, this post makes me look very bad but I'm being honest and it works for motivation.

You have just ensured that no matter how big your penis looks, you will never score with any of the women on this board.

metamorphosis

I am more than happy to supply you with a shovel for you to dig your own grave!

Tactless post, very tactless post.

MyPeopleDrankTheSoup

EileenG wrote: »

You have just ensured that no matter how big your penis looks, you will never score with any of the women on this board.

Damn

MyPeopleDrankTheSoup

Jwacqui wrote: »

Seriously? I managed to ignore some of the others but try having some sort of respect. I don't think any woman should ever be referred to as "fat" or "ugly"

Well I suppose ugly is subjective but you can't call a fat women fat?!
Ok, post might have been bad but it's the truth, and it's the truth for a lot of lads I know as well.

AndRoiD

georgiecasey wrote: »

Well I suppose ugly is subjective but you can't call a fat women fat?!
Ok, post might have been bad but it's the truth, and it's the truth for a lot of lads I know as well.

Woman is a big motivation for myself but i definitely would have put it a bit more tactfully.

Being in good shape gives me confidence that i didn't have before to approach people I wouldn't have before especially the ladies on a night out:p. Also getting comments from friends etc randomly really spurs me on as i know that i must be getting some kind of positive result from all this effort!

peepeep

Jwacqui wrote: »

Seriously? I managed to ignore some of the others but try having some sort of respect. I don't think any woman should ever be referred to as "fat" or "ugly"

I think people are people really hard on georgiecasey. Remember - the OP asked for people to be BLUNT, not to sugar coat their answers. I don't see the problem with labelling fat people as 'fat' - it's the truth. If people on here get offended at use of the word 'fat', then they need to deal with it themselves and not take it out on other posters. Perhaps a brisk walk or a salad might help? The simple fact is that the existence of fat people is often the basis of what motivates fit, healthy people to stay fit and healthy.

Jwacqui

peepeep wrote: »

I think people are people really hard on georgiecasey. Remember - the OP asked for people to be BLUNT, not to sugar coat their answers. I don't see the problem with labelling fat people as 'fat' - it's the truth. If people on here get offended at use of the word 'fat', then they need to deal with it themselves and not take it out on other posters. Perhaps a brisk walk or a salad might help? The simple fact is that the existence of fat people is often the basis of what motivates fit, healthy people to stay fit and healthy.

I think it could have been put a bit more tactfully.

I don't think I was taking anything out on georgiecasey just suggesting he might want to be a bit more tactfull as I felt what he said was disrespectfull and I am sure alot of other people would agree with me on that.

I think that is quite rude of you to say that if people have a problem with the word fat that they need to deal with it themselves and "a brisk walk or salad might help". That's very condescending.

I understand that people being overweight give other people motivation and I listed that as one of my own motivations but while doing so I didn't put other people down.

Yes the OP asked for people to be blunt but I still don't think that comment added anything.
I will assume the OP is female (username suggests this) as am I and I have recently lost 3st 7.5lb, When I had that weight on and was over 17stone I know that the comment made would do the opposite and make me feel terrible about myself.

People need positive motivators not negative in my opinion.

Weight is a VERY senstitive issue for many people and people should be considerate and try word things more appropriately when disscussing the issue.

AARRRGH

Temple_Grandin wrote: »

Sorry to contradict but you are confusing association with cause and effect. The truth is that a lot of people have emotional problems, if those people are also overweight that is automatically assumed to be the cause. Most people who are obese did not get that way through emotional problems, in fact I would say that an improper diet is most likely cause of both issues, the weight and depression. A(obesity) and B(emotional disorders) exist, that doesn't me that A causes B, equally C(diet) could cause A and B.

I agree that being obese makes things harder (causes emotional problems) but you have to ask yourself what kind of mental state would allow you to live such an unhealthy lifestyle for such a long period of time. Most "healthy" people have the ability to correct their bad behaviour. And as we all know, getting obese takes a long time, so that's a lot of uncorrected bad behaviour.

There's also a lot of emotional eaters out there as well.

Anyway, I stand by my comment that if you are finding it hard to lose weight, a few trips to a psychotherapist might be of benefit.

El_Dangeroso

OK, but I think as a causative factor it's an issue for very much a minority of overweight people. If most emotionally healthy people have no problem kicking bad habits does that mean that everyone who smokes has an emotional disorder? Or for that matter, getting drunk every weekend is very bad for you which probably means most of the student population has an emotional disorder too :pac:

I'm just saying that to automatically dispatch someone off to an expensive psychotherapist because they are carrying some extra pounds seems like a gross generalisation. Spend 60 euro a week on high quality unprocessed food instead.

MyPeopleDrankTheSoup

Ah man, don't know about the therapist stuff. I was fat for 2 reasons.
1) I loved food.
2) I *did not* care about the consequences of eating loads of food.

I think it's the same for most people.

EileenG

I have to agree. Someone who eats a whole packet of biscuits at time probably has an emotional problem, someone who eats one or two hobnobs at coffee time probably just likes biscuits.

corkcomp

EileenG wrote: »

I have to agree. Someone who eats a whole packet of biscuits at time probably has an emotional problem, someone who eats one or two hobnobs at coffee time probably just likes biscuits.

thats true! I wouldnt agree that being over weight = emotional issues, however those that get into the morbidly obese category definately have issues IMO ... like another poster mentioned it doesnt happen over night ...

El_Dangeroso

Again I think it comes back to correlation versus causation. Most obese people may have a psychological ailment, but one does not cause the other. They have a common cause. The link between sugar and depression is a well established one.

Also, anti-depressants make you pile on weight like crazy.

AARRRGH

Temple_Grandin wrote: »

Most obese people may have a psychological ailment, but one does not cause the other.

I'm really amazed you have never heard of emotional eaters.

shivvyban

Khannie wrote: »

Motivation for me is easy: I have to make weight for competition. But.....I have found lots of things that make it easier to lose weight. Here are some of them.

1) Don't buy crap. This is the biggest thing you can do IMO. If I open the fridge and there's a kit kat in there poking me in the eye, I'm bloody well going to eat it. Same with the garlic bread on the table with my dinner. If it's poking me in the eye, it's going in my tum tum. If it's not there, I wont miss it.
2) Keep a food diary. This is really simple but unbelievably effective.
3) Allow yourself some treats without feeling guilty. Even when I'm pushing really hard to make weight, I'll still have a biscuit with my coffee. Why? because I'd go mental without some kind of occasional treat.
4) Make gradual changes. Trying to go from eating lots of rubbish to a 100% clean diet is a recipe for failure IMO. Cut out one thing a week and replace it with something better. After 10 weeks you wont want to eat half the crap you used to love.
5) Sugar free jelly. Holy crap this stuff is a winner. I've a real sweet tooth. Love something after dinner. Sugar free jelly is basically calorie free.
6) Don't expect (or even aim for) overnight success. Weight takes time to go on, and time to come off.
7) Aim for lifestyle changes. This ties in with the gradual change kind of thing, but if you feel like you're going on a diet, it becomes easy to fall off the wagon and go back to what you consider "normal". If what you consider "normal" is healthy eating, and aim to get there, I think that helps a bit with the mindset. Feeling like your on a diet is rotten. Feeling like you're eating yourself healthy is very positive.

I am printing this off and hanging it on my desk at work. I think this is the best advice I have ever heard

georgiecasey wrote: »

Well I suppose ugly is subjective but you can't call a fat women fat?!
Ok, post might have been bad but it's the truth, and it's the truth for a lot of lads I know as well.

I would comment on this but I think its already been dealt with in ways far more polite than what mine would have been...

This time around whats getting me through this diet (have 4 stone to lose to be healthy... ) is seeing where I want to be. My ideal career is to be an actress but in order to get the parts I want to get I would have to look a certain way - as sad as it is, thats the way the world works in these situations.

Also, I'm getting married either next year or the year after and I don't want to look back at my wedding photos and cry or just have headshots taken... I've found my dress and damn it, I am going to look good in it.

I look at all this people I admire on TV, friends, on the street and I'm not jealous, I just want to get there myself and this time I have.

From the age of 5 my weight was commented on by people, guys at home used to laugh at me, girls in college used me because I was one of the lads and could introduce them but what finally broke me was being asked when I due about 5 times in the last 6 months and I vowed to myself after the last time that it was never going to happen again until I was actually pregnant.

I want and will to get fit and healthy for me, my OH, my future family and my career.

Whoops... sorry about the long winded post!:o

El_Dangeroso

AARRRGH wrote: »

I'm really amazed you have never heard of emotional eaters.

Oh I definitely have, in my experience most women eat emotionally at some stage of their lives. It's just the fat ones that are called emotional eaters.

AARRRGH

Temple_Grandin wrote: »

Oh I definitely have, in my experience most women eat emotionally at some stage of their lives. It's just the fat ones that are called emotional eaters.

There are different levels of emotional eating. Obese people are at the extreme end of the scale.

We can argue about this all day, but the reality is if you're obese and unhappy and cannot lose weight, instead of giving up or trying another diet, try seeing a psychotherapist. Maybe, just maybe, your obesity is connected to some emotional problem you have.

Pembily

I was overweight, but it wasnt due to emotional eating (maybe 5/6 lb of 45lb), it was just overeating cos I love food!!! I do find now as I am older I will sometimes emotional eat!! Generally when I am stressed!!!!

Everyone is different, but sadly emotional eating is very real and hard to diagnose...