Best one-liners in business or politics

trad

Been thinking about the most influential one-liners as in

Margaret Thacher This Lady is not for turning

Duke of Wellington Being born in a stable does not make you a horse.

My favourite (and i'm not a fan)

Gerry Adams We havent gone away you know.

What are your favourites / influenced you most

Mr.David

We'll burn that bridge when we come to it

Aidric

"I won it on the horses" - Bertie Ahern.

LouOB

I heard a good one yesterday

'I dont have the data on that'
i.e. I havnt a fooken clue
or
'Can we take this issue offline' means Im not having a barney with everyone listening

gaz wac

Gilmore addressing O’Donoghue: “Ceann Comhairle, I think you will either have to resign or I think you will have to be removed from office.”

General Zod

trad wrote: »

Been thinking about the most influential one-liners as in


Duke of Wellington Being born in a stable does not make you a horse.

He never said this

My favourite (and i'm not a fan)

Gerry Adams We havent gone away you know.

He didn't say this either.

Aidric

Aidric wrote: »

"I won it on the horses" - Bertie Ahern.

"Grand so, we'll vote for you again" - Average Irish voter.

Blazer

You're Fired -- pretty much any boss

gustavo

Churchill had some great ones , too lazy to find now

trad

General Zod wrote: »

He never said this



He didn't say this either.

Daniel O'Connell said Wellington said it and Gerry Adams said They not We.

I stand corrected

Sam Vimes

gustavo wrote: »

Churchill had some great ones , too lazy to find now

ooohhh Yesh

Tabnabs

"I did not have sexual relations with that woman"

Yeah, right Bill!

matrixroyal

Senator Lloyd Bentsen to Republican vice-presidential candidate Senator Dan Quayle ( who was styling himself as a jfk type politician ) :

"Senator, I served with Jack Kennedy, I knew Jack Kennedy, Jack Kennedy was a friend of mine. Senator, you're no Jack Kennedy." (Prolonged shouts and applause.)

mikom

"Fuppin' hell"

Adolf Hitler upon reading his gas bill (1945)

K-9

President Johnson "I want to hear the Son of a B*tch deny it!"

Defined the next 50 years of political campaigning.

kraggy

"You should have respect for your betters" - Martin Mansergh to Senator Eugene Regan of Fine Gael.

w123

gustavo wrote: »

Churchill had some great ones , too lazy to find now

To some old dowager giving out to him for being drunk.

'...and you madam are ugly, but I will be sober in the morning.'

matrixroyal

mao tse tung - it's too early to tell if the French revolution has been a success or not

CJ Haughey - Who writes the editorials in the Irish Times? They sound like they were written by an old woman in a bath, with the water going cold around her fanny"

hal9000

As a community we are living away beyond our means. -Charles Haughey, 9 January 1980

MyPeopleDrankTheSoup

'When you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, 'Certainly I can!' Then get busy and find out how to do it.' - Theodore Roosevelt

'We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.' - Aristotle

'The fight is won or lost far away from witnesses - behind the lines, in the gym, and out there on the road, long before I dance under those lights.' -Muhammad Ali

WIZE

Whoever designed the streets must have been drunk....I think it was those Irish guys. - Minnesota governor Jesse Ventura

biko

Mrs Windsor can come and go as she wants.

Pompey Magnus

Molōn labe! (Come and take them!) - The supposed response of the Spartan King Leonidas at the battle of Thermopylae when the Persian army demanded they surrender their weapons.

Agricola

"For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President Reagan. We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex...uh...setbacks." —George Bush, Sr

"I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli."
- George Bush Jnr

Ulysses Gaze

'Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.'

Ronald Reagan

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help.'

Ronald Reagan

On mature recollection..

Brian Lenihan snr

"Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter."

George W. Bush, in parting words to British Prime Minister Gordon Brown and French President Nicolas Sarkozy at his final G8 Summit, punching the air and grinning widely as the two leaders looked on in shock.

"I am not worried about the deficit. It is big enough to take care of itself."

Ronald Reagan

Euro_Kraut

w123 wrote: »

To some old dowager giving out to him for being drunk.

'...and you madam are ugly, but I will be sober in the morning.'

Thats Wilde, not Churchill.

admiralofthefleet

Aidric wrote: »

"I won it on the horses" - Bertie Ahern.

'it was for paddy the plasterer'

Dyflin wrote: »

"I did not have sexual relations with that woman"

'i just dropped my yop down her dress'

humanji

Euro_Kraut wrote: »

Thats Wilde, not Churchill.

It's a bit funny, but I wouldn't call it wild.

ekevosu

Euro_Kraut wrote: »

Thats Wilde, not Churchill.

think that was churchill allright

also:
Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if I were your wife, I'd poison your tea.
Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it.

Long Onion

Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea.
Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it.”

Apparently, he said it twice

General Zod

matrixroyal wrote: »

Senator Lloyd Bentsen to Republican vice-presidential candidate Senator Dan Quayle ( who was styling himself as a jfk type politician ) :

"Senator, I served with Jack Kennedy, I knew Jack Kennedy, Jack Kennedy was a friend of mine. Senator, you're no Jack Kennedy." (Prolonged shouts and applause.)

That was an excellent burn.

walshb

Aidric wrote: »

"I won it on the horses" - Bertie Ahern.

Brilliant, yet so disturbing. This is what you expect to hear from Crime Lords

K-9

General Zod wrote: »

That was an excellent burn.

It was. This one was probably the best self inflicted Burn:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5DZBFbMdjI

matrixroyal

During election debate :
Pat Rabbitte to Michael McDowell about his media obsession called him a "menopausal Paris Hilton", Michael Mcdowell then looked at Pat, Gerry Adams and Trevor Sargeant and said he was looking at "the left, the hard left and the left overs ".


CJ
"I have done the State some service, and they know't. No more of that."

Charlie was talking, in the privacy of this office, to his Press Secretary, Frank Dunlop


Charlie-“Where the **** were you yesterday?”
Dunlop- “Yesterday...Sunday...I was at home in the bosom of my family”
Charlie- “We’re making some progress.....the ****er knows yesterday was Sunday”

slipss

"Of course I inhaled, that's the idea" - Obama when asked if he had ever smoked cannabis and if he inhaled.

genericguy

martin mc guinness: "we'll have to consult with the army council on this"

our very own fat cnut cowen: "yeah, well there's a mirror in the toilet if you want to go in there and talk to them."

absolute gold.

MrMatisse

matrixroyal wrote: »

mao tse tung - it's too early to tell if the French revolution has been a success or not

CJ Haughey - Who writes the editorials in the Irish Times? They sound like they were written by an old woman in a bath, with the water going cold around her fanny"

That was Deng Xiaoping not Mao tse tung

Jeez, everyone knows that.

4zn76tysfajdxp

Agricola wrote: »

"I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli."
- George Bush Jnr

That was George Bush Snr.

banquo

You will withdraw that statement.

genericguy

banquo wrote: »

You will withdraw that statement.

i will not withdraw it.

RHJ

This post has been deleted.

pebbles21

Thats not a real gun ! John Lennon 1980

wilson10

A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.


Winston Churchill

wilson10

Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just glad to see me.

Mae West

junkyard

The Mayor of Hiroshima, "What the f*ck was............."
A vasectomy means never having to say your sorry.
"I shook hands with the Pope once and my whole right side sobered up" Dean Martin.

drunkmonkey

"I inhaled frequently, that was the point!"

Barack Obama when asked did he ever smoke Marijuana.

"I won't kick gays!"

George Bush mocks Al Gore, his opponent in the 2000 elections, for admitting to smoking cannabis, and also dismisses him as a liar.

RHJ

This post has been deleted.

vinylbomb

The Times ran an article on this a while back, some of the ones I can remember:

“A sheep in sheep’s clothing” Winston Churchill talking about Clement Attlee.

“She probably thinks Sinai is the plural of sinus” Someone (cant remember!!!) on Margaret Thatcher.

wilson10

I was under medication when I made the decision not to burn the tapes.

No event in American history is more misunderstood than the Vietnam War. It was misreported then, and it is misremembered now.


Richard M Nixon

wilson10

There will be no whitewash in the White House.

Richard M. Nixon

MementoMori

Labour Chancellor Denis Healey described being attacked by Richard Howe as "like being savaged by a dead sheep".