Shag Bands - Is it occuring in Ireland?

chele

I read this in a paper and I am absolutely horrified. I just wonder to what extent this is going on in Ireland. I think parents ought to know, its very concerning.

Basically I read that illuminous coloured bands are being worn by kids as young as 7 in schools and that each bracelet colour symbolises what sexual act they are prepared to perform. Parents are completely unaware that each piece of cheap jewellery represents a differeny sex act. This secret code corresponds to colours and when a boy snaps the bracelet off their arm, the girl has to do what the band symbolises.

According to the code used in Birtish Isles,


Yellow- Hug
Pink- Flash
Blue- oral sex
Black symbolises - going the whole way
Gold means doing all of the above

This is horrendous and worst of all its kids as young as 11 and 12 who are driving it. There is pressure placed on young girls to show what they are willing to do and many girls do not want to be seen as not willing to do these acts, so they buy the bangles.

I can't imagine it happening here, but then again I am constantly amazed what is seen to be acceptable in Irish society these days

I think parents should be wary to this, as the bracelets look like harmless accessories... never in my life would I have thought when I wore those highlighter coloured plastic bangles as a 90's teenager that they had a new and twisted meaning!

3DataModem

This is largely an urban myth, and has been passed around as a rumor for the past several years.

Nerin

Urban myth and scare mongering, which,ironically, will probably give them ideas.

chele

I hope its an urban myth, it would be horrible to think that kids are acutally buying these bands as symbols of their sexual intentions.
They are way too young to know what they are letting themselves into.

I always thought rainbow parties were urban myths too, but apparently not!
Scary!!!

Nerin

chele wrote: »

I always thought rainbow parties were urban myths too, but apparently not!
Scary!!!

Rainbow parties? Any sources / links?

Moonbeam

http://www.snopes.com/risque/school/bracelet.asp

stovelid

I wear my own media band.

It confers protection from idiotic sensationalist news articles and twitches violently if I come within two feet of a copy of most of the rags sold in this country.

Nevyn

Those plastice rubber stings which are crafted into braceletts are all the rage atm,
for some werid reason they are called 'scoobies', there was a kit of them bought in smyths and we managed to make a few and to use some of the craft beads she has floating around all over the sodding house.

They are an arts and crafts fashion acessorty and thats it.

I find the idea that is it some sort of child hanky code to be daft.

January

Thaedydal wrote: »

Those plastice rubber stings which are crafted into braceletts are all the rage atm,
for some werid reason they are called 'scoobies', there was a kit of them bought in smyths and we managed to make a few and to use some of the craft beads she has floating around all over the sodding house.

They are an arts and crafts fashion acessorty and thats it.

I find the idea that is it some sort of child hanky code to be daft.

My sister taught me how to make those years ago... are they back now??

Nevyn

They are back and with enough of a bang they have been banned from the school.

Oh and the paper that covered this was the daily mail, also know as the daily fail.

miss no stars

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2009/9/14/1252937408156/shag-bands-001.jpg

they are shag bands


they've been around a long, long time here. It's nothing new. Kids joke about with them. They're (mostly) not serious about it. It's just something for girls to giggle about (or at least it was when the boys in my primary class were all snapping the black bands of the girls...)


Storm. Teacup. In.

Answers on a postcard please.

Sukie_asleep

We used to wear them in primary school in about 6th class (10 years ago) and we called them shag bracelets and they denoted various sexual acts... I remember black meant going all the way. Nobody actually did anything though, I wouldn't worry.

Noffles

To the OP, why can't you imagine this happening in Ireland???

Please elaborate I'm dying to hear what justifies it..

Toots

When I was in 6th class (1998 or thereabouts), we all wore them and called them shag bracelets. We all knew what the colours supposedly meant, but I'd be fairly certain in saying that the colours worn by the girls in the class were in no way representative of their sexual experience, or what they were prepared to do. I think when I finished primary school, only one girl it the class had actually kissed a boy properly.

Nothing to worry about I'd say.

sillineysarah

Hey everyone,

So my 11 year old daughter asked could we go to Dundrum today for a bit... she had €20 burning a hole in her pocket!

On route there in the car I ask her what she's going to buy... the reply... Shag Bands!

Now, I've heard of these bands cropping up in Wesley disco and couldn't believe that the sexualisation of young girls has come to this. My daughter tells me that 3rd class up are wearing them.

For those who don't know, shag bands are coloured rubber bands worn on the wrist and supposedly if someone snaps one you have to perform the act which it represents... ranging from hug to hickey. But I've heard they also can imply any act from oral sex to full intercourse!!!

OBVIOUSLY for my 11 year old and the primary school kids they dont have a clue what the representation of these bands REALLY are. She knew the idea behind them and they represent hug and kiss but it's not even the act that pisses me off about these idiotic bands its the entire implications behind them. The fact that these bands are widely known about and the thought of little girls walking around putting out to the world this impression is just so disgusting to me.

I am just raging at the way young girls are portraying themselves now and the pressure they seem to be under to conform to this whole new early sexualisation.
For example "sexting" (taking pictures of yourself nude and texting them)... there are girls as young as 12/13 doing this, I guarantee no young boy is going to do it.. WHY is that the way? Why do the girls feel the need to put themselves out there in this light in order to gain boys attention?

I could go on and on... I'm just pissed off that we've allowed it to get this bad. I wonder is it more prevalent in Ireland and how could it have changed so much in such a time... I'm 30 so it's not that long since I was there myself!

Any thoughts??

LegacyUser

It's terrifying frankly that this is the world we are bringing our kids into today. I don't even want to think about how I'll feel when my daughter is a teenager. Sex is everywhere nowadays. Teenage kids are at it on Home and Away, it's spoken about on the radio, newspapers, mags, music videos, Mylie Cyrus pole dancing, and so on.

I think the career orientated, money obsessed professionals of Celtic Tiger Ireland neglected a lot of their duties as parents over the last 15 or so years. Kids have been running riot because their parents are too focused on careers and making money. It's my hunch that the next generation of parents have identified the damage this has caused to today's young teenagers and we will be a lot more cautious with giving our kids the freedom to go to their teenage discos, and socialising late into the night in their early teens.

Ultimately, kids will copy what they see around them, first and foremost from their parents, and secondly from their peers and the media. As parents, we must set the right example and try our best to encourage our kids to recognise moral values. Hopefully, the rest of society will follow but I'm not holding my breath.

iguana

sillineysarah wrote: »

OBVIOUSLY for my 11 year old and the primary school kids they dont have a clue what the representation of these bands REALLY are.

Umm no, I think that it's you who don't know what they really are. They really are elastic bracelets that kids like to wear, your 11 year old has it right. I wouldn't get too worried about it.

Nevyn

What I find amusing is that those rings/braclets were oringally designed as freedom rings.

http://www.swade.net/gallery/symbols.html

Freedom Rings, designed by David Spada with the Rainbow Flag in mind, are six colored aluminum rings. They have come to symbolize independence and tolerance of others.
Freedom rings are frequently worn as necklaces, bracelets, rings, and key chains.
Recently, Freedom Triangles have emerged as a popular alternative to the rings, though the meaning remains the same.

When/why they started being used instead of the hanky code I don't know.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hanky_code

Handkerchief code or hanky code (also known as bandana code and flagging) is a way of indicating, usually among gay male casual sex-seekers or BDSM practitioners in the leather subculture in the United States, Canada and Europe, whether they are a top or bottom, and what kind of sex they are seeking, by wearing cotton color-coded handkerchiefs (bandanas), usually in the back pocket or around the belt loop. Hanky code was widely used in the 1970s as a gay code, however nowadays it is also used by many bisexual, pansexual, and queer people.[1]

Chuchoter

I can't believe you're all being so hysterical. These things aren't real. I'm in 5th year and though I know of them, I've never in my life seen anyone wearing them. And to be honest if you think bracelets will be the downfall of your innocent little girls in 1st and 2nd year (YES 1st and 2nd year, I know several girls who lost their virginity at that age) you've your head in the clouds. Slutty girls are slutty, bracelets and rainbow parties, existant or non-existant aren't going to change that.

smelltheglove

My 7 yr old wears them but the kids call them jelly bands.

My 13 year old brother wears them and was able to tell me what every colour meant. Around where I work there are a fair few teenagers wearing them, one of the young lads was chatting to me a couple of weeks ago and told me what they meant as I was saying my little one wanted some black ones. He gave me a few for her and then told me what they were supposed to mean.

Back in the day, (ha 10 yrs ago) the black ones were the thing but they were just rubber bands, nothing special about them.

Noffles

societyproblem wrote: »

It's terrifying frankly that this is the world we are bringing our kids into today. I don't even want to think about how I'll feel when my daughter is a teenager. Sex is everywhere nowadays. Teenage kids are at it on Home and Away, it's spoken about on the radio, newspapers, mags, music videos, Mylie Cyrus pole dancing, and so on.

I think the career orientated, money obsessed professionals of Celtic Tiger Ireland neglected a lot of their duties as parents over the last 15 or so years. Kids have been running riot because their parents are too focused on careers and making money. It's my hunch that the next generation of parents have identified the damage this has caused to today's young teenagers and we will be a lot more cautious with giving our kids the freedom to go to their teenage discos, and socialising late into the night in their early teens.

Ultimately, kids will copy what they see around them, first and foremost from their parents, and secondly from their peers and the media. As parents, we must set the right example and try our best to encourage our kids to recognise moral values. Hopefully, the rest of society will follow but I'm not holding my breath.

"Won't someone please think of the children..." Christ sake, Victorian Values!!

Dudess

I don't think it's "Victorian" to ask whether sex is being injected into kids'/adolescents' popular culture (I don't know whether it is or not - I do know I loved Madonna between the ages of seven and 11, when she was at her raunchiest, and I didn't particularly notice; then again she wasn't targetting little girls as her audience) but I do think it's certainly inadvisable to pay too much attention to media-fuelled speculation.

ash23

I think I'd be more worried about kids being so stupid as to think they have to perform a sex act for a random member of the opposite sex, simply because s/he managed to get a coloured bracelet off their wrist.

I would hope that it's a trend and that while they may know what it's *supposed* to represent, none are actually gullible enough to actually do it.

If you're genuinely worried your teen will give a guy oral sex because he managed to snap a band off her wrist, then I would think that the problem runs deeper than her wearing a faddy bracelet.

CrazyRabbit

You wouldn't believe the things that I got up to when I was 10-14, and we didn't have any of these 'shag bands'. Kids that age have always experimented...from a quick kiss to, well, eh, less innocent endeavours. I don't think these 'shag bands', or a lack of them, will have much of an impact on that.

Again, people are trying to blame inanimate objects for failures in other places. All that is needed is proper age-appropriate sex education and a strong parental-child relationship that allows open discussion about sexuality and peer pressure.

stovelid

So by my reasoning, if we ban these things, we also stop underage sex?

Get to it, minister!

muffy

I work in an accessories shop and am asked at least once a day by a parent and/or kid of either gender "do you have shag bands?" The store doesn't sell them...I find it weird that a parent would seek to purchase these for a primary school kid given the implications they have assumed.

LegacyUser

I became aware ofthese bands the other day when we received a letter from my 8yr old sons school saying they had been banned. I asked my son what they were and I was outraged by his reply. Hopefully other schools will follow suit.

EraseAndRewind

my daughter is 9 and her and all her friends wear these

and no they are not all swopping them for sexual favours they are swopping them because they like them and they are collecting the different coloured ones

sometimes we as parents need to take a step back and realise that despite what some newpapers would hav you believe,our children are not all on the cusp of becoming raging sex maniacs

parsi

I passed a shop today (discount shop near Burger King) and they had a notice saying "Shag bands now available". Now I know...

Deliverance

My 5yr old asked for these 'bands' today because they are popular in school. We got a packet of 50 or so for a couple of euro. They are colourful and simple and had no meaning to her other than being popular. After a minute or two I realised that these were the infamous bracelets!

During a coffee sitdown, I whispered the meanings of the bracelet colours to my partner with a bit of concern (that I heard from this thread). She could not believe it and was a little shocked!!

Later on, on a family visit with my partners 80yr old mom, my partner passed me 1 black and 1 blue band from the packet;)

smelltheglove

The anger about shag bands, in my opinion, is ridiculous. I spoke to someone last night who was actually enraged by the fact that parents let 5 yr olds wear these. Honestly it made me think, come on, they are bracelets, get over it.

Herb Powell

societyproblem wrote: »

It's terrifying frankly that this is the world we are bringing our kids into today. I don't even want to think about how I'll feel when my daughter is a teenager. Sex is everywhere nowadays. Teenage kids are at it on Home and Away, it's spoken about on the radio, newspapers, mags, music videos, Mylie Cyrus pole dancing, and so on.

I think the career orientated, money obsessed professionals of Celtic Tiger Ireland neglected a lot of their duties as parents over the last 15 or so years. Kids have been running riot because their parents are too focused on careers and making money. It's my hunch that the next generation of parents have identified the damage this has caused to today's young teenagers and we will be a lot more cautious with giving our kids the freedom to go to their teenage discos, and socialising late into the night in their early teens.

Ultimately, kids will copy what they see around them, first and foremost from their parents, and secondly from their peers and the media. As parents, we must set the right example and try our best to encourage our kids to recognise moral values. Hopefully, the rest of society will follow but I'm not holding my breath.

you seem to think teenagers have never had sex before now

iguana

societyproblem wrote: »

Mylie Cyrus pole dancing, and so on.

Miley Cyrus is hardly a child, she's less than ten weeks away from being an adult. (I had to look that up - I'm not some crazy Cyrus fan;).)

And she was just dancing around a pole while fully clothed on a stage. It's nothing more than a former child star adding slight titillation to her act in order to transition her career into her adulthood.

charlemont

shock !! horror ! call a priest, call de valera, he will put manners on the kids ..

kids interested in sex ?? whatever next ...


when i read that i burst out laughing, what kind of person would take that seriously ?? a hysterical person... id hate to be that posters kid..

iv a 12 year old boy , he has his 1st girlfriend now and im delighted for him..
he dosent need to sneak around and try to hide things from me ...

desertcircus

Shag bands: a fashion craze among the parents of teen and tween children to panic that the wearing of a coloured bracelet indicates their child is a sex maniac willing to perform for anyone interested enough to touch their arm.

Seriously, this is nonsense. It's an urban myth. Stop worrying about shag bands and just raise your damn children. If you do a good job, they won't bang anyone who pulls on the right bracelet.

Galvasean

'Shag bands' I remember those from when I was in primary school. Back then the idea was if you broke the band - for some reason - you had to shag the person who gave it to you. Of course no one did, we were about 10 at the time.

Horse_box

Some of the reactions in here are hilarious!

Look, if you honestly believe your kid is buying these to actually represent what sexual encounters they have had, it's not the bracelets you should be worried about, it's your parenting

witchywoman

i had heard about these but did not take them seriously until my 10 yr old came home and told me that some of the girls were wearing the colour for a "lap dance' and "full sex" and that if a boy snapped the band they would have do do it ...i was horrified and promptly advised the school principle as i honestly did not think that my daughter should be subjected to the peer pressure of the girls a year ahead who said she was "frigid" for not partaking , the principal responded by banning the bands and the parents association gave a talk on peer pressure to the students , i can honestly say i did it for my child, to not be subjected to such filth at age 10 . Call me hysterical all you want , but i almost vomited at the words coming out of her little mouth , she is still my baby.I dont think that lap dancing technique should be discussed with little girls .

Of course you did the right thing getting touch with the school if your daughter was being put under pressure like that and the school did the right thing by banning them ...but i do thing there can be a slightly hysterical over reaction to some fads...it reminds of those silly newspaper article about teenagers and sex ...you know the kind of thing ...shock horror teenagers are having sex!

thesimpsons

and what will you do if and when the same girls just stop wearing the bands inside the school and wear them to and from school. better to educate your daughter than getting everything banned. Since the year dot, there have been wiser and more mature kids hanging around with more innocent ones. There's nothing you can do anything about it though.

we had an issue in my girls primary school where girls posted photos on facebook of themselves and teachers on their school tour. the school got up in arms over it and the teachers were demanding the photos be taken down. Sorry, but once its done outside of school hours and not on a school computer, there is actually very little you can do about it if the parents don't co-operate. Its a sad fact that there are many parents who just don't give a dam and will let their children do as they like but you just have to live around it.

Delicate_Dlite

Hi,

I'm not a parent, but I saw this on new posts, and I remember when I was in primary school and we had the original 'shag bands' plain black ones.

I was in 4th class (late nineties) when they became the new trend, and of course some of the more 'enlightened' kids told the rest of us, how they worked and they're meaning. :rolleyes:

Although there was talk of 'Jake broke Chloe's SB now she has to kiss/have oral sex/intercourse with him.' It never led anywhere, it was simply a 'joke' and a way to embarass the more innocent of the children. And used a way to make themselves look more mature and therefore *cooler*.:rolleyes:

I would say, that although you may not like your child hearing or discussing these things, but it's impossible to completely protect them for it.

My advice would be is that you as the parent should broach the subject and explain to them, about sex and peer pressure etc.

Also I knew I never told/talked to my parents about anything of a sexual nature I heard as school, even if I was confused and I did want to ask questions. So it's a good sign if your kids are actually talking to you about it.

PJTierney

Maybe I should take off this Blue band I've been wearing for the past year or so..

MultiUmm

I saw some first years wearing them yesterday. I think they're the only year who'd wear them tbh. The hysteria here is pointless. They're only having a bit of a laugh, I seriously doubt there'll be a huge rise in the number of kids becoming pregnant and the std rate rising in conjunction.

It's so silly that these "shag bands" detract from more serious issues affecting younger teenagers, e.g discussion of mental health, sex, drinking etc. No one seems too bothered about the complete lack of any focus on these issues.

StupidLikeAFox

PJTierney wrote: »

Maybe I should take off this Blue band I've been wearing for the past year or so..

Or better yet get someone else to

LegacyUser

my six year old came home with one today. I'm disgusted. I dont for one minute think that kids as young as her would act on it but I just dont like the idea of her even talking like that! (i asked her what it means if a boy breaks it she said it means you have to have S-E-X on the beach) Am wondering whether to ask principal to ban them from school or if i'm just being prudish

Namlub

sandydunne wrote: »

I became aware ofthese bands the other day when we received a letter from my 8yr old sons school saying they had been banned. I asked my son what they were and I was outraged by his reply. Hopefully other schools will follow suit.

Wearing a few coloured bracelets isn't going to turn kids into raving sex maniacs you know. Fair enough if you want them banned from schools, but with kids that age it'll probably be something different in a few weeks anyway. And schools can confiscate things until the cows come home, but it's it's not really their responsibility to make sure kids don't grow up thinking sexual activity should be dictated by rubber bands...

Dudess

Banning coloured bracelets on what grounds? They're used to signify sex acts? But they're still just coloured bracelets. If they're banned, the sex acts will probably be ascribed to some other item. When I was 10/11, over 20 years ago, we often had school playground discussions on blow jobs and sexual positions - because of curiosity, which is a reality for kids learning about the birds and the bees, bracelets or no bracelets. It's not like we even understood the half of what we were talking about anyway. Caysm, that's gonna be even more applicable to six-year-olds - although I can understand you feeling uncomfortable, to say the least, to hear a six-year-old using such terminology.

SportsGreatest

I'm fifteen, so I just thought I'd pop in here and give you my opinion.

Shag Bands have come into "fashion" again a few weeks ago, at least in my locality. I am wearing two at the moment - white and black.

I think you are all over-reacting to be honest. Yes, they all do represent a sexual act, or something similar, but that doesn't really hold any significance. Everybody sees them as a joke - people will break your black band (sex) for a laugh. Nobody actually takes them seriously and performs the act.

That's just my two cents.

jill_valentine

It seems likely to me that some or all of the kids wearing them originally got the idea from the press, rather than the other way around.

Good work Thinking Of The Children, Daily Fail.

Squiggler

I remember when kiss chasing was popular with my class in my primary school (and subsequently banned). There were a few of us who refused to take part in the game because our parents had taught us to have respect for ourselves and not to just let anyone who could catch us kiss us

There will always be something, it's just how kids are, but parents who've brought their children up to have respect for themselves and others will never have to be too worried.

TheQ47

There were some advantages going to all boys schools, then.