Where is Queen Mise?

cherryghost

There she is!!

joes girls

I miss her........she was a good nest friend, it will never be the same now!!!

Bring back the queen!!!

kerash

+1

colrow

She's in deep, deep undercover werk, disguised as an essex girl, but don't tell no-one

homah_7ft

Come back Queen.

Deki

We miss you truely:(
COME BACK!!! (please?:))

colrow

Part One




Q: What do you call an Essex girl with half a brain ?

A: Gifted!


Q: How do Essex girl braincells die ?

A: Alone.


Q: How do you brainwash an Essex girl ?

A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.


Q: How does an Essex girl part her hair ?

A: (Action of scissoring legs apart)


Q: Why do Essex girls wash their hair in the kitchen sink ?

A: Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!


Q: Why didn't the Essex girl want a window seat on the plane ?

A: She'd just dyed her hair.


Q: Why didn't the Essex girl want a window seat on the plane ?

A: She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much.


Q: Why do Essex girls wear their hair up ?

A: To catch as much as they can that is over their heads.


Q: Why is it good to have an Essex girl passenger ?

A: You can park in the handicap zone.


Q: Why is an Essex girl like a turtle ?

A: They both get ****ed up when they're on their back.


Q: How do you make an Essex girl's eyes light up ?

A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.


Q: Why should Essex girls not be given coffee breaks ?

A: It takes too long to retrain them.


Q: How can you tell if an Essex girl's been using the computer ?

A: There's Tipp-Ex on the screen.


Q: What's the difference between an Essex girl and a computer ?

A: You only have to punch information into a computer once.


Q: What do an Essex girl and your computer have in common ?

A: You don't know how much either of them mean to you until they go down on you.


Q: What did the Essex girl think of the new computer?

A: She didn't like it 'cos she couldn't get East Enders....


Q: Why do Essex girls wear shoulder pads?

A: (With a rocking of the head from side to side) I dunno!


Q: How do you kill an Essex girl?

A: Put spikes in her shoulder pads.


Q: How do Essex girls pierce their ears?

A: They put tacks in their shoulder pads.


Q: Why don't Essex girls eat Jelly?

A: They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.


Q: What do you call an Essex girl with a fiver on the top her head?

A: All you can eat, under a fiver.


Q: Why don't Essex girls eat pickles?

A: Because they can't get their head in the jar.


Q: Why do Essex girls wear hoop earings?

A: They have to have some place to rest their ankles.


Q: What does an Essex girl put behind her ears to make her more attractive?

A: Her ankles.


Q: Why do Essex girls wear green lipstick?

A: Because red means stop.


Q: Why do Essex girls wear red lipstick?

A: Because red means "Stop, wrong hole."


Q: How can you tell if an Essex girl has been in your refrigerator?

A: By the lipstick on your cucumbers.


Q: Why don't Essex girls use vibrators?

A: They chip their teeth.


Q: Why do Essex girls wear underwear?

A: They make good ankle warmers.


Q: What do Essex girls do for foreplay?

A: Remove their underwear.


Q: What's the mating call of the Essex girl?

A: "I'm *sooo* drunk!"


Q: What is the mating call of the ugly Essex girl?

A: (Screaming) "I said: I'm drunk!"


Q: What's the mating call of the London girl?

A: "All the Essex girls have gone home!"


Q: What's the mating call of the Geordie girl?

A: "Next!"


Q: Why do Essex girls like VAT?

A: Because they can spell it.


Q: What is 83 to an Essex girl?

A: 69 plus VAT.


Q: Why do Essex girls have TGIF on their shoes?

A: Toes go in first.


Q: Why do Essex girls have TGIF on their shirts?

A: Tits go in front.

Deki

I'm stealing that Col- thankyou:p
With a change of essex I kn ow just who I'm sending it to;)

colrow

;)Pure plaigarism. Go for it

Queen-Mise

bloody heck, look what i just found.

I was searching for something else (promise)

cherryghost

:O

*hugs*

welcome back!!


2000th post! woo what a day!!!

homah_7ft

Yeah right queen

Your post is no good here cherry have to try again for 2000

cherryghost

awww man... (:D)

Queen-Mise

For some very strange reason. I really like this thread.

Look what I have and you don't, na na ne na na.

holly1

Welcome back,your majesty.You dont really know me,but I feel I know you the girls are always going on about you.
I will introduce myself,Im Holly1,Hi:).

Queen-Mise

Holly how are you doing. Its good to be home again. This is where I spend all my time on boards. I think I can safely say im back again.
I think I might go and exterminate our lil wolf

colrow

You never mind how Holly is doing, just get JG's trained as a concubine for me to take to sowdee

Queen-Mise

what kind of spelling is that col?

colrow

i learnt it off that redneck Deki

Hows tricks everyone ?

holly1

What do you mean 'NEVER MIND HOLLY'the cheek!!!!

colrow

A todger in the hollybush is worth two in jgsbush

holly1

You never change,try saying that to a lady in Saudi and you might find yourself tougherless:p

colrow

i'll risk it for a frisk it

holly1

Colrow the EUNICK!!!!!!:p

Queen-Mise

Do you mind not slagging on the Queen's thread.

Colrow is never going to change Holly. He is an unfortunate case :P:P

holly1

You never said a truer word,and that man is going to get into trouble in Saudi,he cant keep his gob shut.....the nooo.

Deki

colrow wrote: »

i learnt it off that redneck Deki

Hows tricks everyone ?

Not true Col:(
I never taught you a single thing !:p

Queen-Mise

Deki wrote: »

Not true Col:(
I never taught you a single thing !:p

i think Col was a lost cause, before he even met you Deki

holly1

Morning Mise,whats the weather like where you are??

Queen-Mise

Sunny and windy where I am.

The river is very high, can see it bursting it banks today or tonight.

holly1

Hope you are high up!!!

Queen-Mise

I have a specially designed tent for the top of the house.

holly1

One that floats!!!