strange "as" sayings that make no sense.

df1985

my mam today commenting on the state of me last night said i was as drunk as an owl.i was puzzled, ive never seen a drunk owl anyways!got me thinkin of strange "as" sayings that people use and was wondering can anyone think of others?
off the top of my head i had:

as pissed as a fart

as mad as arses

4zn76tysfajdxp

Pain in the as?

Jam-Fly

as stupid as a prostitute

mikom

As mad as mad Jack McMad, the winner of this year's Mr Madman competition.

AlmightyCushion

As daft as a box of frogs.

wexican

sweating like a whore.

just realised there's no "as" in that.

*leaves quietly*

Sofaspud

As cunning as a fox that's just been appointed professor of Cunning at Oxford University.

Hal1

As sh/t 'as' this thread.

boogle

As odd as a bottle of chips.

Anna Molly

you're up and down that stairs like a hoor's knickers.

It doesn't have "as" in it but it makes me laugh.

SoWatchaWant

Mad as a bag o' hammers.

Latchy

' Mad as a box of frogs ''

or
'' Eat horse and you'll get grass ''

yeah Mah ,what ever you say .

jesus wept ....still trying to work that one out

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Nuttier than squirrel poo.

paulhealy1991

"stupid like a fox" homer simpson
drunk as 42 mops
drunk as 43 pussy cats
as useful as a jam sandwich to a drowning rabbit

Senna

As long as a month of Sundays
As cute as a button
As happy as Larry Who the feck is this larry
As sweet as a nut
As clear as a bell

TPD

Ikky Poo2 wrote: »

Nuttier than squirrel poo.

That makes perfect sense given squirrels stereotypically eat nuts.

Also - 'Odd as a bottle of chips' - that makes sense too, your describing something as being odd by comparing it to something that would be odd, if such a thing existed.

Jam-Fly

As mad as a bag of spiders

dutchcat

as drunk as a skunk or stone hatchet mad

Tom1991

mad as a bag of cats springs to mind

ScissorPaperRock

Well if this thread has shown anything it's that bags of various things are pretty mad.



Edit: Oh and just heard this one recently - as useless as a fiddler's fart.

Apparently fiddlers have particularly useless farts.

Aisling(",)

As angry as a bag of weasels
always used to use it in irish but ive never heard of angry weasels
comh crosta le mala easog

Overheal

Sober as a Judge.

We know the truth.

Super-Rush

As gay as christmas

ya-ba-da-ba-doo

I was once told while watching a match "this game's as shìtty as me arse"

ejmaztec

The Irish Government.

Jay P

As mad as a brush

illiop

Aisling(",) wrote: »

As angry as a bag of weasels
always used to use it in irish but ive never heard of angry weasels
comh crosta le mala easog

yeah, but i think if you gathered up a bunch of them and put them in a bag they're bound to get a bit ticked off

Long Onion

The stickiest situation since sticky the stick insect got stuck on a sticky bun.




Insert "AS" in place of your choice.

Penn

Oh Jesus how I hate 'as pissed as farts'. The only phrase worse is 'Ah stop the lights'

biko

Sound as a bell

Turd Ferguson

This thread is as stupid as a long shore fisherman who spends all of his money on clock radios and little tuxedos for his pet parrott.

Long Onion

"As infuriating as a woman who nags you over no putting the toilet seat back down when the only reason that the issue arose in the first place is the fact that they are too lazy to do it themselves and have decided to use the outdated and mercurial concept known as etiquette to try to avoid doing yet another mediocre and everyday task for themselves"

El Siglo

As fat as Harney.

chakotha

P1ssed as arseholed

Um, it don't compute.

brummytom

As sick as a parrot


WTF? I've never saw a parrot with even a slight stomach upset

Adamcp898

As rare as a fish

Turd Ferguson

brummytom wrote: »

As sick as a parrot


WTF? I've never saw a parrot with even a slight stomach upset

Really?

orourkeda

As sweet as a nut.

orourkeda

Long Onion wrote: »

The stickiest situation since sticky the stick insect got stuck on a sticky bun.




Insert "AS" in place of your choice.

You cant beat a bit of the auld blackadder.

Latchy

'' Bobs your uncle ''

no he isin't , who the hell is this Bob anyway ?

mp22

As sick as a chocolate frog

netwhizkid

as ugly as the arse end of an elephant

brummytom

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Really?

Is that where that phrase comes from?!

Shacklebolt

"Sweating like a pig."

Pigs don't sweat

meditraitor

As sick as a small hospital,
As full as a train to calcutta
As full as an egg


all perfectly sensible

ShooterSF

brummytom wrote: »

Is that where that phrase comes from?!

I'm going to assume that's a joke and you get the reference....

(This thread was built for Blackadder btw)

brummytom

ShooterSF wrote: »

I'm going to assume that's a joke and you get the reference....

(This thread was built for Blackadder btw)

Yeah I get the reference, but I was asking seriously whether that saying stemmed from that sketch? It happened with the word 'flange' in Not The Nine O'Clock News.. I just wondered if Monty Python had anything to do with the nonsensical 'sick as a parrot'.

I'm a bit thick, yes

Irish Trinity

sweating like a knacker trying to read...insert 'as' somewhere?

pebbles21

If my auntie had balls she'd be my uncle

Wertz

As rough as a badger's arse.

[edit] Parrots are notorious for getting ill (and usually dying) when kept as pets...pretty sure it stems from that and not the dead parrot sketch...

tara666

........he doesnt have his ducks all in a row....i think it mean he is stupid or something like that lol