advice re ending personal training

cats-pyjamas

Hi,

I have been working with a personal trainer now for about 3 months, seeing him every 2 weeks or so. It's been great, but I can no longer afford to keep it going. How do I let him know? It feels like firing someone, and I feel guilty because it will have an effect on his finances too. Should I give notice or is it ok just to say "I can take it from here, thanks" or should I just say that I can't afford it any more?

If anyone has experience in this area, please let me know what I can do to make this awkward converstation easier!

Hail 2 Da Chimp

Hope this helps:

1. Pick an appropriate place. The less public, the better. Remember, ending a relationship is a humbling experience. Don't do it in a place where the person on the receiving end is going to feel more vulnerable than necessary; however, beware of an overly remote situation in case your ex trainer loses control and resorts to violence.
2. Choose the right time. Avoid holidays and special occasions like birthdays and anniversaries at all costs. Do you really want your ex trainer remembering your insensitivity every time that day rolls around?
3. Do it in person. If the relationship is relatively new, maybe you can get away breaking up over the phone. But come on, if you've been out on more than a handful of classes, isn't that kind of harsh?
4. Be honest but sensitive. No one likes to get dumped. But we at least appreciate the truth when it's over. Unless, of course, the truth is you've stopped finding him/her attractive, you've met someone better, or that you're just plain bored with the relationship.
5. Keep your emotions in check. Don't seem too happy about the breakup: you'll come off as mean-spirited. Just be kind, caring, and considerate.
6. Don't react. Some people don't handle rejection well. Some people yell, scream, or cry. But it doesn't mean you should react to their meltdown. Remember, rejection is tough. You've already got the upper hand by being the dumper. Let the dumpee behave ridiculously if they choose to. And if their tantrum escalates, get the heck out of there! Don't wait around for the aftermath!

the drifter

tell it like it is.... tell him your broke...im sure he will understand...

if that fails...

do it stone cold steve austin style....stunner and crack open a can of beer...

Red Cortina

I've been thinking about this too. I don't want to end working with the guy I go to right now. But I know for a fact that the day will come when I can no longer fork out for his fee.

I'm sure that, as the previous post said, if you just tell him/her that you can't afford it then it is fairly understandable.

ragg

At the end of the day its a business, A lot of people would just end it and not give it as much thought as you are.

The best thing you can do is be honest. If you can't afford the expense then thats all there is too it.

Give the message, wish him well, go about your business.

Just be honest and sincere. If you want to see him again when you can afford it, tell him, if not, don't.

No big deal.

cats-pyjamas

Thanks guys. I always feel uncomfortable talking about money (mainly because I rarely have any!) but you all give good advice.

Many thanks to you.

cowzerp

Hail 2 Da Chimp wrote: »

Hope this helps:

1. Pick an appropriate place. The less public, the better. Remember, ending a relationship is a humbling experience. Don't do it in a place where the person on the receiving end is going to feel more vulnerable than necessary; however, beware of an overly remote situation in case your ex trainer loses control and resorts to violence.
2. Choose the right time. Avoid holidays and special occasions like birthdays and anniversaries at all costs. Do you really want your ex trainer remembering your insensitivity every time that day rolls around?
3. Do it in person. If the relationship is relatively new, maybe you can get away breaking up over the phone. But come on, if you've been out on more than a handful of classes, isn't that kind of harsh?
4. Be honest but sensitive. No one likes to get dumped. But we at least appreciate the truth when it's over. Unless, of course, the truth is you've stopped finding him/her attractive, you've met someone better, or that you're just plain bored with the relationship.
5. Keep your emotions in check. Don't seem too happy about the breakup: you'll come off as mean-spirited. Just be kind, caring, and considerate.
6. Don't react. Some people don't handle rejection well. Some people yell, scream, or cry. But it doesn't mean you should react to their meltdown. Remember, rejection is tough. You've already got the upper hand by being the dumper. Let the dumpee behave ridiculously if they choose to. And if their tantrum escalates, get the heck out of there! Don't wait around for the aftermath!

Please tell me your messing? Its not a couple breaking up, its the end of a business transaction..

Just tell him your broke at the moment and cant afford to do the PT untill your circumstances change, tell him thanks that you learned lots and got good benefits from it, if he is professional he will wish you well and tell you to call him when your back in a position to do the PT.

I reckon "hail 2 da chimp" is taking the pi*s

He'd have to be with his name !!!

OREGATO

Deleted User wrote: »

I reckon "hail 2 da chimp" is taking the pi*s

He'd have to be with his name !!!

google also reveals it was stolen from here:

http://www.wikihow.com/Break-Up-with-Someone-Using-Style-and-Sensitivity

Hail 2 Da Chimp

Ahhhrg, my secret plan revealed - TBH as said before, I don't see it as a big deal.
You can't afford it, your PT should be professional enough to understand this.

If he's that good, he knows you'll come back when the money situation picks up.

d'Oracle

Hail 2 Da Chimp wrote: »

Hope this helps:

1. Pick an appropriate place. The less public, the better. Remember, ending a relationship is a humbling experience. Don't do it in a place where the person on the receiving end is going to feel more vulnerable than necessary; however, beware of an overly remote situation in case your ex trainer loses control and resorts to violence.
2. Choose the right time. Avoid holidays and special occasions like birthdays and anniversaries at all costs. Do you really want your ex trainer remembering your insensitivity every time that day rolls around?
3. Do it in person. If the relationship is relatively new, maybe you can get away breaking up over the phone. But come on, if you've been out on more than a handful of classes, isn't that kind of harsh?
4. Be honest but sensitive. No one likes to get dumped. But we at least appreciate the truth when it's over. Unless, of course, the truth is you've stopped finding him/her attractive, you've met someone better, or that you're just plain bored with the relationship.
5. Keep your emotions in check. Don't seem too happy about the breakup: you'll come off as mean-spirited. Just be kind, caring, and considerate.
6. Don't react. Some people don't handle rejection well. Some people yell, scream, or cry. But it doesn't mean you should react to their meltdown. Remember, rejection is tough. You've already got the upper hand by being the dumper. Let the dumpee behave ridiculously if they choose to. And if their tantrum escalates, get the heck out of there! Don't wait around for the aftermath!

ROFLYSATTOAKB

noodlescat

Hey if you no longer need your trainer can you pm me his details
Been gym-ing it for 7 months - have lost 10lbs and toned a little but need a guiding hand

MelonieHead

d'Oracle wrote: »

ROFLYSATTOAKB

WTF?

all_smilz

I recently ended things with a PT, i'd been going about 5weeks.... I emailed him as I didnt want to waste phone credit on him trying to talk me out of it....
If He hadnt been a TOTAL bollox 85% of the time I might have done it more nicely but I kept it short and sweet.
Asked him not to contact me re my decision as I was resolved on the matter.
Just be straightforward and I am sure he will respect it.

Red Cortina

all_smilz wrote: »

I recently ended things with a PT, i'd been going about 5weeks.... I emailed him as I didnt want to waste phone credit on him trying to talk me out of it....
If He hadnt been a TOTAL bollox 85% of the time I might have done it more nicely but I kept it short and sweet.
Asked him not to contact me re my decision as I was resolved on the matter.
Just be straightforward and I am sure he will respect it.

Where was your PT located??

all_smilz

all_smilz wrote: »

I recently ended things with a PT, i'd been going about 5weeks.... I emailed him as I didnt want to waste phone credit on him trying to talk me out of it....
If He hadnt been a TOTAL bollox 85% of the time I might have done it more nicely but I kept it short and sweet.
Asked him not to contact me re my decision as I was resolved on the matter.
Just be straightforward and I am sure he will respect it.

Seems like you didn't get on in the slightest with him. May I be nosy and ask what made him such a "bollox" ?

d-gal

OP just say it after your next session or call into him and say it, nothing more annoying than getting a txt or email of someone, extremely unprofessional. He will respect you a lot more and might give you a few extra tips as well. He will be much more likely to take you back if you do decide in the future. I know a lot of trainers that refuse to train a person again if they sent an abrupt text or something similar.

all_smilz

Deleted User wrote: »

Seems like you didn't get on in the slightest with him. May I be nosy and ask what made him such a "bollox" ?

There was just a general personality clash from the start but lets just say there was an incident where my trust in him was let down by a bit of ignorance and unprofessional behaviour.
I reasoned with myself that he "Knew his stuff" and some of the times I was enjoying the session so much (cos it was tough) that I kept going.

I also felt a bit bullied into getting more and more sessions despite being unemployed and stretching my finances to go as it was.

Killme00

Hail 2 Da Chimp wrote: »

Hope this helps:

1. Pick an appropriate place. The less public, the better. Remember, ending a relationship is a humbling experience. Don't do it in a place where the person on the receiving end is going to feel more vulnerable than necessary; however, beware of an overly remote situation in case your ex trainer loses control and resorts to violence.
2. Choose the right time. Avoid holidays and special occasions like birthdays and anniversaries at all costs. Do you really want your ex trainer remembering your insensitivity every time that day rolls around?
3. Do it in person. If the relationship is relatively new, maybe you can get away breaking up over the phone. But come on, if you've been out on more than a handful of classes, isn't that kind of harsh?
4. Be honest but sensitive. No one likes to get dumped. But we at least appreciate the truth when it's over. Unless, of course, the truth is you've stopped finding him/her attractive, you've met someone better, or that you're just plain bored with the relationship.
5. Keep your emotions in check. Don't seem too happy about the breakup: you'll come off as mean-spirited. Just be kind, caring, and considerate.
6. Don't react. Some people don't handle rejection well. Some people yell, scream, or cry. But it doesn't mean you should react to their meltdown. Remember, rejection is tough. You've already got the upper hand by being the dumper. Let the dumpee behave ridiculously if they choose to. And if their tantrum escalates, get the heck out of there! Don't wait around for the aftermath!

This didnt get the LOL's it deserved.

Killme00

all_smilz wrote: »

There was just a general personality clash from the start but lets just say there was an incident where my trust in him was let down by a bit of ignorance and unprofessional behaviour..

Sounds like he dropped the hand....or you did!!!!!

tut tut :pac:

Come on David Hare - get a grip for ****s sake. You look really pathetic when you come on to boards.ie and start bigging yourself up...

You do know people can see your other posts right ???

Sort it out for ****s sake.

all_smilz

Killme00 wrote: »

Sounds like he dropped the hand....or you did!!!!!

tut tut :pac:

*shudders*
nah, i went to him after i had an upsetting experience in gym (i caught kids looking in and making fun of me during a training session), he thought i was calling to whinge and laid into me til I cried, THEN told me i had self esteem issues and when i finally said what had actually happened he changed his tune but kept banging on about my low confidence.... It really pissed me off that he ignored me, was quite nasty and then didnt support me remotely, he used to ask me personal questions in the middle of the gym.
I used to come early to warm up and stretch before we started so i couldnt see why i couldnt get a 5minute chat about my progress after a workout....
But in general I just plain didnt connect with the guy.

Drop the hand my arse!

Mellor

cookerj wrote: »

J
You should read more of my posts TheEntrepreneur, just to be sure!!

I did, and you've posted that in at least 5 threads.