Do most men sleep with prostitutes??

sarmer

Hi guys

Just a query - might sound a bit naive though! I've heard alot of stories lately about guys I know or friends of friends using prostitutes. Do most guys at some point use them? Is it something a girl needs to be seriously concerned about when getting into a relationship (in terms of stds etc)? Also should it be assumed that if a guy has been on a lads holiday to Thailand/Amsterdam that he's been with one?

Sorry if I sound really innocent, it's just something I've never really thought about before!

Sonderval

Most do not

LegacyUser

I wouldn't say so.

I know a few who have but it's not the majority - generally it's when they are away.

Lux23

I read an artilce years ago that said that these day about 16% of men used prostitues which has decreased from a wartime figure of 25%. Now I have no idea where I read this but the figures have stuck in my mind. I find a good portion of men are disgusted by this, I can imagine its can be as degrading for the punter as it is for the escort.

Latchy

sarmer wrote: »

Hi guys

Just a query - might sound a bit naive though! I've heard alot of stories lately about guys I know or friends of friends using prostitutes. Do most guys at some point use them?

No , lots of guys will give it a thought at some time in their lifes and be approached by prostitutes but many will never go ahead with it and actually want or pay them for sex .

Is it something a girl needs to be seriously concerned about when getting into a relationship (in terms of stds etc)? Also should it be assumed that if a guy has been on a lads holiday to Thailand/Amsterdam that he's been with one?

No , the red light district in Amsterdam is as much a tourist attraction for all ages groups ,curisoity being the main reason and not just for men on a weekend tear .The prostitues on display in the windows are also routinely checked for any sexual transmitted diseases.

shellyboo

Yeah, this "omg prostitues are dirty" malarkey really baffles me. Prostitutes are more aware and careful of their sexual health than anyone else out there - you're far safer STI wise having sex with someone who insists on protection and gets tested every six months routinely than you are some random punter who thinks they're invincible.

Gyalist

shellyboo wrote: »

Yeah, this "omg prostitues are dirty" malarkey really baffles me. Prostitutes are more aware and careful of their sexual health than anyone else out there - you're far safer STI wise having sex with someone who insists on protection and gets tested every six months routinely than you are some random punter who thinks they're invincible.

Your assertion is not necessarily factual.

Do you really believe that sex workers in an unregulated market have a strict incentive to have regular checks?

Jumpy

shellyboo wrote: »

Yeah, this "omg prostitues are dirty" malarkey really baffles me. Prostitutes are more aware and careful of their sexual health than anyone else out there - you're far safer STI wise having sex with someone who insists on protection and gets tested every six months routinely than you are some random punter who thinks they're invincible.

Yer in Ireland now girly. Lots of Catholic history here. Very backward attitude to sex and sexual freedoms.

Nevyn

How is a personal issue for you?

aranrn

Thaedydal wrote: »

How is a personal issue for you?

I think it's fair to say this a personal issue. She's probably concerned about her boyfriend.

finbarrk

sarmer wrote: »

Hi guys

Just a query - might sound a bit naive though! I've heard alot of stories lately about guys I know or friends of friends using prostitutes. Do most guys at some point use them? Is it something a girl needs to be seriously concerned about when getting into a relationship (in terms of stds etc)? Also should it be assumed that if a guy has been on a lads holiday to Thailand/Amsterdam that he's been with one?

Sorry if I sound really innocent, it's just something I've never really thought about before!

Most fellas that go to the likes of Amsterdam, Prague, parts of Asia, etc.,would have had the oportunity to use them anyway.

meglome

I know several who have but the majority that I know haven't. Personally I have no moral issue with it, once women are not being exploited but I wouldn't do it myself.

shellyboo

shellyboo wrote: »

Yeah, this "omg prostitues are dirty" malarkey really baffles me. Prostitutes are more aware and careful of their sexual health than anyone else out there - you're far safer STI wise having sex with someone who insists on protection and gets tested every six months routinely than you are some random punter who thinks they're invincible.

Sorry but that just isn't true! Someone who has sex with strangers all day every day is far, far more likely to carry STD's than the average person, even someone fairly promiscuous. So what if they get tested every six months - if you're having sex with randomers every day of your life, six months is a very, very long time. It just takes the punter before you to have been infected with something and then you've got it as well. There are STD's you can get even with protection and some of them you can't test for. And this is talking about the likes of the regulated prostitutes in Amsterdam, not Bangkok or wherever else!

sarmer

Sorry should have stated - it's a personal issue for me because I've been involved with a couple of guys who've been on lad's holidays to Thailand/Amsterdam and wondering if there is a high chance that they were with prostitutes and if I should be worried. And I'm also just wondering if it's a concern for any future relationships as currently not involved with anyone.

Bluefoam

shellyboo wrote: »

Yeah, this "omg prostitues are dirty" malarkey really baffles me. Prostitutes are more aware and careful of their sexual health than anyone else out there - you're far safer STI wise having sex with someone who insists on protection and gets tested every six months routinely than you are some random punter who thinks they're invincible.

I heard recently that 35% of prostitutes in Dublin have AIDS

LegacyUser

Above post of 16%...~1 in every 5...sounds about right to me.

Personally wouldn't do it, but out of every five lads I know, I'd say one of them has got a b.j. or whatever from a prostitute.

One guy I know used to have one visit him on Friday evenings. He would never join us straight away for pints after work, but would go home, have sex with the prostitute and come back in to the pub. Sad, but true.

LegacyUser

i went to amsterdam with about 40 other lads, on the flight over about 7 or 8 were all talkin about going to see them, after we got there the lads doin all the talkin had to get pissed to go in while the majority off the lads just snuk off to do the deed on the first night. after that night everyone of us walked around regularlly visitin them on the way to the pub or cafe. i think a lot off men deny it ive never seen one in this country but visited two in amsterdam and all off the lads went at least once. all in our early 20's

Iago

Bluefoam wrote: »

I heard recently that 35% of prostitutes in Dublin have AIDS

I heard recently that 86% of men said that they either had been with a prostitute or would be in the future[size=-12]*



*may be made up on the spot[/size]

If you ask most guys have/would they be with a prostitute/escort they'll say no, even if it's only their mates asking. I would hazard a guess (and that's all it would be) that a much higher % of men than you would expect already have or will sleep with a prostitute/escort at some point in the future.

I've no idea what that % is, and to be honest neither does anybody else who might reply here, but it could well be the closest answer you'll get.

Carsinian Thau

No.

Rb

Depends on the prostitutes really. Some high class whores in Vegas, for example, can make more in a month than most will in a year and are generally visited by lonely nerdy types or businessmen whos own sex lives in their relationships have either ground to a halt or have gotten stale.

The tramps you find down the canal/on leeson street at night...well...they're visited by the type of man you really don't want to be near. And drunks, I'm sure they get plenty of business from drunks.

Personally prostitutes disgust me and I believe they deserve whatever they get, and I know a lot of other people (both men and women) feel the same.

sarmer wrote:

Is it something a girl needs to be seriously concerned about when getting into a relationship (in terms of stds etc)?

At the start of every relationship, whether they've been with a prostitute or not, you should be concerned about STDs and use all protection available until you've both got tested.

Otis Driftwood

Never have never will.Alot of my friends have (while on holiday) but Ive never been that hard up.

Seriously,if you need sexual release that much have a ****.

I personally find the idea of prostitutes repulsive.

LegacyUser

Check out the WHO stats on HIV and STD rates. They particular note that in regulated areas and Germany is used as a particular example that the rate of HIV infections in commercial sex workers is comparative with that of the general population. About .1%. Generally in the US it is believed that the rate of HIV in commercial sex workers (those operating legitimately) is about 0.5 to 1 % which is slightly higher than the average of the normal population (.1%)

Also, Asia and particularly Thailand have been pro actively persuing the sex trade in the last 10 years with regarding to regulating it and bringing down the rate of HIV. I can't remember the figures, but I am sure they are on the net, the rate of HIV in the workers there has dropped substantially and is not that far above the rates in the industrialised world.

To answer the OPs question, no most men do not use sex workers, I think a good proportion do at some stage in their lives but most do not. As regards STIs, well it depends, if someone goes to a sex worker in regulated industry and uses a condom (99% of workers will insist anyway) then generally speaking the risk is extremely low. Any single protected sexual encounter carries very little risk of any exposure but HPV and HSV are always a possibility when you have sex with anyone. That risk is probably elevated with a Sex Worker. But double a low risk activity e.g. .1% chance of getting HSV becomes .2% still not very high.

It all depends on the person and what they risk etc and what activities they engage with. You can't generalise too much on this.

Liam Byrne

Re the OP's question:

I can't speak for most men, but the answer here is a definite no, and have never.

How many replies like that do you think would alleviate your worry, and cover the word "most", OP ? And why would you even think this way anyway ?

It's like a "do most men cheat" or "are most men curious about homosexuality" question - both of which appear here regularly......any posters can only - genuinely - speak for themselves.

The Big Red Button

You know, the STI risk wouldn't be much of an issue with me, as there is always a chance of a partner having an STI - whether he's slept with one girlfriend, or twenty prostitutes.

What would bother me is the probability that, if a man would sleep with a prostitute, chances are he would have very different values and morals to me. This might affect the chances of the relationship working in the long term.

Having said that, for me at least, it wouldn't be a dealbreaker. Young lads do a lot of silly things, sometimes under peer pressure, and people can change.

sarmer wrote: »

And I'm also just wondering if it's a concern for any future relationships as currently not involved with anyone.

I think that potential STDs should be a concern for you in any relationship - whether the man has slept with prostitutes or not.

And yes, for me anyways, the fact that he had sex with prostitutes and the reasons behind it would be a concern - but it wouldn't be a concern for everyone, and it's up to you to decide if it's something that would bother you.

LegacyUser

ok I'm I the only guy reading this who finds this attitude of 'all mean are the same and thus must use prostitutes' insulting and annoying ? U know what some if not most mean actually have respect for their own bodies and their own health. Some if not most actually have enough self-respect to never consider going to prostitutes. Personally I find the idea repulsive. I do know some guys who have used them, but everyone of those guys had major self-esteem issues which they tended to dress up in disguises like 'i work too hard to have a GF'. b*ll**ks

So, if you are seriously concerned that your ex's may have been with prostitutes, and if you have real worry you might have picked something up, don't post your worries and sweeping generalisations on a web forum - go to a doc/std clinic and get yourself tested and have your mind set at ease. because you really really won't find any peace on here asking questions like do all guys use prostitutes

reprazant

Rb wrote: »

Personally prostitutes disgust me and I believe they deserve whatever they get, and I know a lot of other people (both men and women) feel the same.

Really? You think that prostitues deserve to get beaten, splashed, raped, murdered because you find their job disgusting?

Prostitutes generally don't choose to become prostitutes but are forced into it due to financial needs, drug needs or actually just being forced into it.

I find attitudes like yours disgusting.

Dexterm99

sarmer wrote: »

Also should it be assumed that if a guy has been on a lads holiday to Thailand/Amsterdam that he's been with one?
!

Have you seen the quality of prozzi's in the red light district of Amsterdam? They are dreadful! I wouldent go near them with someone else's.

shellyboo

Gyalist wrote: »

Your assertion is not necessarily factual.

Do you really believe that sex workers in an unregulated market have a strict incentive to have regular checks?

They do if they want to hang onto their fertility and health, yeah. Based on my own experience with men, particularly in Dublin - the amount of people out there having unprotected sex is HUGE. I can count on one hand the number of men I've slept with who've put a condom on voluntarily without me having to ask - I'd need to borrow some hands to count the number who were fully prepared to have sex with no condom, not knowing my sexual history or if I'd been recently tested.

I would see sex workers as women (and men) with a little more savvy and gumption than that, people whose sexuality and sexual health is their living - from my own experience, I'd say they're much more safe than most people out there.

Jumpy wrote: »

Yer in Ireland now girly. Lots of Catholic history here. Very backward attitude to sex and sexual freedoms.

OMG, really? I hadn't noticed :pac:

[quote=[Deleted User];61275065]Sorry but that just isn't true! Someone who has sex with strangers all day every day is far, far more likely to carry STD's than the average person, even someone fairly promiscuous. So what if they get tested every six months - if you're having sex with randomers every day of your life, six months is a very, very long time. It just takes the punter before you to have been infected with something and then you've got it as well. There are STD's you can get even with protection and some of them you can't test for. And this is talking about the likes of the regulated prostitutes in Amsterdam, not Bangkok or wherever else![/quote]

Six month regular checkups, as far as I know, are the norm for sex workers. There's no reason for anyone to have them with a higher frequency than that.

Like I said above Izzy, the chances of a prostitute having unprotected sex with someone is pretty damn low. They're aware of all the diseases out there, they know they have to be careful.

As for those STIs contractable even with a condom, you've got HPV - which everyone has anyway - and herpes. You're gonna notice if a sex worker or a randomer has big scabby sores all over their bits.

Yes, prostitutes have more sex than randomers. But I bet there are prostitutes out there who have never had unprotected sex once. I knew a guy who'd had sex with over 100 women and never once used a condom. He's not alone, either. Who do you think is more likely to have an STI there? The prostitute, just cos she's selling it? That's preposterous.

All I'm saying is - sex workers have more awareness of sexual health than the average population. It's their job. If I was working in an infectious diseases lab, I'd make damn sure I was well protected at all times so I didn't catch anything. What makes anyone think that prostitutes don't have the same sense of self-preservation?

sarmer

don't post your worries and sweeping generalisations on a web forum

Where exactly did I make a sweeping generalisation? I never said that all guys use prostitutes, I asked if it is something I should be concerned about because I have heard many instances recently of guys using them.

Adamisconfused

Never have been to any and never would go.

Wagon

If i was cheated on and dumped, hadn't had sex in a few years and was drunk and stoned and in Amsterdam i might just say "fúck it", i dunno. Apart from that, it's never been something id see myelf doing.

Something you need to remember is that a lot of men that might use prostitutes is because it's easier. For women, it's a lot easier to get a shag off some bloke when they feel like one. They just get approached more and have more oppurtunities. Men are a different case, certainly if you have a face like mine And prostitution isn't that differnt from a one night stand. I'm going to get absolutely slated for this but...

One night stand: Man meets woman, they have sex, leave the next day and never see each other again. (He wants sex and she wants sex and all are happy)

Prostitute: Man pays woman, they have sex, leave and never see each other again. (Man wants sex, woman wants money and all are happy)

LegacyUser

sarmer wrote: »

Where exactly did I make a sweeping generalisation? I never said that all guys use prostitutes, I asked if it is something I should be concerned about because I have heard many instances recently of guys using them.

To be fair i think some of the repsonders have made more generalisations but

Also should it be assumed that if a guy has been on a lads holiday to Thailand/Amsterdam that he's been with one?

Thats not quite a sweeping generalisaiton....but its pretty close to one - kind of an implied one i guess, like you are coming to that conclusion but haven't quite reached it yet.
I've been in that part of the world. yes there is a lot of that kind of stuff. None of the guys i was out there with went anywhere near a prostitute.

LegacyUser

Having lived abroad for years in places that include Amsterdam and Hamburg I would say most guys I have known in these places have done at least once and for many it would be a regular thing. Now back in rural Ireland where I come from hardly any would, mostly as they never had the chance when drunk enough or horny enough.

Latchy

Dexterm99 wrote: »

Have you seen the quality of prozzi's in the red light district of Amsterdam? They are dreadful! I wouldent go near them with someone else's.

That is very true ,many tarted up 50 year olds made to look like 25 year olds .

LegacyUser

my ex once went to amsterdam with him mates just before he met me. I asked about the red light district and what they saw etc. he said some of the prostitutes were amazing looking but they didnt use them. he said he wouldnt be that desperate to PAY for sex. and i think thats how most of his and my friends would feel. to have to actually pay someone for it! pretty desperate.

ynotdu

hi I made a point of reading every reply posted on this thread,only one seemed to come close to asking the question i am going to.

Is the question by the OP a fair question to men?
Why not ask if Women sleep with male escorts?
this myth that women have NO sex drive is a myth in my experiance.
often women initiate sex as foolishly as guys do,add alcohol to the equation for either sex and..........

OP i do not mean any offense to you,you come across as a really lovely person:)

what bugs me is that this idea that men are sly and all are bastards as if it was endemic in only the male of the species.


safest attitude to std,s is surely to assume until you know diffrient for sure that anyone we have sex with is a carrier and take precautions as a matter of course?

Silverfish

Well, I presume the OP is female and was asking as it's an issue for her, rather than throwing out a general query. I doubt she's saying women wouldn't do it, just from her question it seems unlikely that she would be dating women, but dating men, and hence asked about them.

Latchy

ynotdu wrote: »

Is the question by the OP a fair question to men

Yes because OP is asking a question about a particular place known for it's sex buisness and were men of all ages and races frequent for weekends .

safest attitude to std,s is surely to assume until you know diffrient for sure that anyone we have sex with is a carrier and take precautions as a matter of course?

And you are probably more likely to contact it with a psotitute that has slept with maybe up to twenty or more guys a day ,many ( guys) of who will not give a hoot about contacting any sexual disease because the countrys were they come ie, Africa is highly infected with it anyway .

As mentioned , Postitutes being checked reguarly for std etc , doesn't mean many wont have it and pass it on just as some of their clients will to

peeka

Unregistered wrote: »

he said he wouldnt be that desperate to PAY for sex. and i think thats how most of his and my friends would feel. to have to actually pay someone for it! pretty desperate.

Everyman pays for sex one way or another!

LegacyUser

Here's to our wifes and girlfriends ,may they never meet

Groucho Marx

how very apt....lol

LegacyUser

Rb wrote: »

Depends on the prostitutes really. Some high class whores in Vegas, for example, can make more in a month than most will in a year and are generally visited by lonely nerdy types or businessmen whos own sex lives in their relationships have either ground to a halt or have gotten stale.

The tramps you find down the canal/on leeson street at night...well...they're visited by the type of man you really don't want to be near. And drunks, I'm sure they get plenty of business from drunks.

Personally prostitutes disgust me and I believe they deserve whatever they get, and I know a lot of other people (both men and women) feel the same.



At the start of every relationship, whether they've been with a prostitute or not, you should be concerned about STDs and use all protection available until you've both got tested.

You believe prostitutes deserve whatever they get? including murder, attack, rape, exploitation, humiliation and all kinds of abuse?

What about the women who have been trafficked here against their will and the women that are doing out out sheer desperation or women that have been bullied into or forced into it. Because I think that covers a great deal of them. Women don't just go into prostitution for a laugh, who the hell would sell their body to any passing sleaze bag, dirty old man or drunken scumbag and risk their safety into the bargain because they like it?

Many prostitutes have addictions, most have been abused as children or adults, many have grown up in care.

It's ok looking at those 'tramps' you see by the canal and blaming them for sexual behavior that you don't like (and I don't like it either) but I think you need to remember that these women are often the biggest victim of all.

I don't want to turn this into a debate on prostitution because that's not what the OP was asking about. Personally I wouldn't sleep with a man who'd been to a prostitute and I don't think 'most' men do. I do however suspect that more men have or would then they are prepared to admit.

ynotdu

Silverfish wrote: »

Well, I presume the OP is female and was asking as it's an issue for her, rather than throwing out a general query. I doubt she's saying women wouldn't do it, just from her question it seems unlikely that she would be dating women, but dating men, and hence asked about them.

Silverfish i realised that my post might be considered a bit off-topic,i posted anyway because SO many threads seem to be hostile to guys and go unchallenged.Sweeping statements against men seem to be fair game(it is obvious that political correctness allows women to basicly say anything about men and if it was vice versa the poster would be infracted,banned or post deleted or closed)

the sooner all the myths about men are challenged each time they appear the sooner the hidden agenda started by feminists are put to rest the better.
many broken relationships would i believe have been saved if propaganda had not got in the way of a person having the time to think for themselfs about what is best for them.
kind regards

Silverfish

ynotdu wrote: »

Silverfish i realised that my post might be considered a bit off-topic,i posted anyway because SO many threads seem to be hostile to guys and go unchallenged.Sweeping statements against men seem to be fair game(it is obvious that political correctness allows women to basicly say anything about men and if it was vice versa the poster would be infracted,banned or post deleted or closed)

the sooner all the myths about men are challenged each time they appear the sooner the hidden agenda started by feminists are put to rest the better.
many broken relationships would i believe have been saved if propaganda had not got in the way of a person having the time to think for themselfs about what is best for them.
kind regards

If you have an issue with a post, report it.

This is a forum for general discussion, and women will generalise about men and be corrected, and men will generalise about women and be corrected. I can think of several today alone where this ocurred and nobody was banned or infracted for it. The op used the phrase 'Do MOST men' not 'Do ALL men'.

Back on topic.

ynotdu

Latchy wrote: »

Yes because OP is asking a question about a particular place known for it's sex buisness and were men of all ages and races frequent for weekends .


And you are probably more likely to contact it with a psotitute that has slept with maybe up to twenty or more guys a day ,many ( guys) of who will not give a hoot about contacting any sexual disease because the countrys were they come ie, Africa is highly infected with it anyway .

As mentioned , Postitutes being checked reguarly for std etc , doesn't mean many wont have it and pass it on just as some of their clients will to

the OP used the word also about foreign destinations,the first part of her question was about guys in general.
regards

Nevyn

Most men don't some men do, if it's an issue or a deal breaker for you then talk to your partner/bf/person you are dating.

ynotdu

Silverfish wrote: »

If you have an issue with a post, report it.

This is a forum for general discussion, and women will generalise about men and be corrected, and men will generalise about women and be corrected. I can think of several today alone where this ocurred and nobody was banned or infracted for it. The op used the phrase 'Do MOST men' not 'Do ALL men'.

Back on topic.

Silverfish we will have to agree to differ as i dont agree with you that a 50/50 say is given on this type of issue in real life or on boards.ie(where threads of this type appear)

Nevyn

ynotdu banned for one week for persistently arguing with a mod warning which is off topic posting and as well all know
Unhelpful and off-topic posting will get you banned from this forum.
Do take time to read the charter which contains the rules and abide by them.
Have a nice day.
Thaedydal

sarmer

Is the question by the OP a fair question to men?
Why not ask if Women sleep with male escorts?
this myth that women have NO sex drive is a myth in my experiance.
often women initiate sex as foolishly as guys do,add alcohol to the equation for either sex and..........

Fair enough! Obviously cos I'm a straight girl I'm only asking cos I'm dating men. I'm sure there are some women who do hire escorts but it's safe to say that the majority of people who pay for sex are men. Can't say I've ever heard of a girl paying for it, although of course it happens. But obviously it's easier for girls to get sex without paying for it.
Dunno where the myth that women have no sex drive comes from!! But in fairness can you imagine a group of girls going to thailand on holiday and them all hiring male prostitutes?!

BraziliaNZ

i used to use them every now and again, even when i had gfs, but i have been free of them for a while! It's not a moral issue i have with it but i think i'm more inclined to make an effor to ask women out now that my hooker problem is curbed. Most friends i have have been with hookers, but we're not your everyday bunch i guess, and i am the only person i know that has used them here in Ireland.

finbarrk

Most men that have visited Amsterdam have used them no matter what they say when they come home.

aranrn

Thaedydal wrote: »

ynotdu banned for one week for persistently arguing with a mod warning which is off topic posting and as well all know
Unhelpful and off-topic posting will get you banned from this forum.
Do take time to read the charter which contains the rules and abide by them.
Have a nice day.
Thaedydal

Harsh but fair.