Punched in the face by Degsy

In All Fairness

Okay, in the spirit of the AH mini-beers and in deference to the man who organises these things, I would like to posit the question; what would you say to Degsy in order to get him to step over the other people he hates just to get to you?

I'll start the ball rolling;" Sorry,did they tell you it would be €22 they must have forgotten to include the garlic bread, it's actually €28.50. Have you nothing smaller?"

\Awaits obvious yet hurtful jokes

TwoShedsJackson

"Hi I'm a Lithuanian swan-eating immigrant, over here to take your job. Did I mention I was a rabid lefty?'

Jesus Wept

Ask him if he wants to buy some U2 tickets.

Duckjob

Put on a curly-haired wig, a prosthetic "beak" nose, and glasses and follow several feet behind him as he walks through town singing loud abusive songs about him on a guitar.

The_Minister

Casually let slip in the conversation that you are a notably industrialist, and that you are giving work visas to Nigerians, because "they need help, and someone has to care".












Then tell him you have to back to your caravan now.

stovelid

Be RB.

Xavi6

Tell him your name's Dave McSavage and that RB is your U2-fan boi love child.

Gummy Panda

Offer him a sandwich for lunch

4zn76tysfajdxp

Graffito (is that right?) a large "Howya Degsy" on the side of his house, surrounded by some pictures of floating sandwiches.

Nerin

Tell him youre RB,but on top of that,that you've been made mod of the cuckoos nest and thunderdome,and hes still banned from the nest,and now from the dome.

Instant nose danger.

My name is URL

Pretend you like Bono and offer to but him a breakfast roll from a Polski store

Red Hand

Invite him to become the meat in a human sandwich involving Bono and Dave McSavage.

Abi

Tell him we all want to change the dates for Karma again.

PeterLT

TwoShedsJackson wrote: »

"Lithuanian swan-eating immigrant"

What?

JC 2K3

"Hello, I'm a pedophile"

ronano

I'd sell him a sandwhich

Overheal

I'd just walk up to him, confirm that he's Irish and ask if he knows Seamus.

My name is URL

PeterLT wrote: »

What?

You eat our swans apparently, didn't you know?

Degsy

You fcuckin people arent right,you know that?:D

Overheal

Degsy wrote: »

You fcuckin people arent right,you know that?:D

Dont judge me!

*whack*!

PeterLT

My name is URL wrote: »

You eat our swans apparently, didn't you know?

No, but I have heard this story with Polish lads...

I would like to make an official announcement. Lithuanians do not eat Irish, nor other nationality swans. (it's really hard to pluck feathers from them...)

Though, there are written prove, that Lithuanians were eating crows in 1740, but saying this about swans is blasphemy and I request to stop it immediatlely.

*BTW Swans aren't so innocent, have you ever been attacked by them while canoeing? You can crap your pants how scary they can be...*

BaileysComet

PeterLT wrote: »

*BTW Swans aren't so innocent, have you ever been attacked by them while canoeing? You can crap your pants how scary they can be...*

I hate/am terrified of swans. They can be vicous b*st*rds when they want to be. All animals defend themelves to a certain degree but some creatures don't stop until they're sure you're never getting up again.

4zn76tysfajdxp

I would also offer him a scholarship to Ballymaloe Cooking School. Specifically, the sandwich making course.

Abi

PeterLT wrote: »

*BTW Swans aren't so innocent, have you ever been attacked by them while canoeing? You can crap your pants how scary they can be...*

Can't be having that. don't wear any.


Yore a real life.. wow. I always thought the LT was some sort of a reference to Volkswagon vans.



*Whoosh over head*

4zn76tysfajdxp

Abigayle wrote: »

*Whoosh over head*

I'd say there's all sorts of "whoosing" going on if you don't wear any trousers.

CianRyan

What the hell did i miss?!

projectmayhem

CianRyan wrote: »

What the hell did i miss?!

Exactly what I was thinking....

PeterLT

Abigayle wrote: »

Can't be having that. don't wear any.


Yore a real life.. wow. I always thought the LT was some sort of a reference to Volkswagon vans.



*Whoosh over head*

Yeah, don't wear any pants... And which part of my body will be chosen to be attacked first? Head? Don't think so...

Volkswagen van? Nah, they're for hippies. But you're close, VW Golf was called car of the nation at some stage in LT.

Abi

PeterLT wrote: »

Volkswagen van? Nah, they're for hippies. But you're close, VW Golf was called car of the nation at some stage in LT.

I know

Matthew Sticky Raccoon wrote: »

I'd say there's all sorts of "whooshing" going on if you don't wear any trousers.

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHOHOHOHOHO!


I look rather fabulous actually.

Earthhorse

What's Degsy's beef with sandwiches?

Overheal

Gluten?

Wertz

BaileysComet wrote: »

... can be vicous b*st*rds when they want to be. All animals defend themelves to a certain degree but some creatures don't stop until they're sure you're never getting up again.

But enough about Degsy...what about these swans?

BaileysComet

So we're out of Abbey's panties and back into Degsey again?

Abi

BaileysComet wrote: »

So we're out of Abbey's panties and back into Degsey again?

Someone was in my panties? I missed that.
























*Must have been Irish :pac:

FunkZ

Well in the spirit of my job I'd say...

'Hey there, would like a free day pass to Jacky Skellys?!' :P

Poor Uncle Tom

PeterLT wrote: »

..... Lithuanians do not eat Irish......

should bloody well hope not..

asdasd

..... Lithuanians do not eat Irish...

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

should bloody well hope not..

The recession is early days, yet.

Poor Uncle Tom

Ordering take-away in 2012....

I think I fancy thigh tonight...:D

PeterLT

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

should bloody well hope not..

Wha!? First you're accusin' us eating swans, now Irish... Hmmm, Irish...

*goes to the back yard, lets all the swans free and starts to build bigger cages...*