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Punched in the face by Degsy

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  • 11-07-2009 7:53am
    #1
    In All Fairness
    Closed Accounts Posts: 515 ✭✭✭


    Okay, in the spirit of the AH mini-beers and in deference to the man who organises these things, I would like to posit the question; what would you say to Degsy in order to get him to step over the other people he hates just to get to you?

    I'll start the ball rolling;" Sorry,did they tell you it would be €22 they must have forgotten to include the garlic bread, it's actually €28.50. Have you nothing smaller?"

    \Awaits obvious yet hurtful jokes
    Tagged:


«1

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    #2
    TwoShedsJackson
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,438 ✭✭✭TwoShedsJackson


    "Hi I'm a Lithuanian swan-eating immigrant, over here to take your job. Did I mention I was a rabid lefty?'


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    #3
    Jesus Wept
    Registered Users Posts: 25,243 ✭✭✭✭Jesus Wept


    Ask him if he wants to buy some U2 tickets.


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    #4
    Duckjob
    Registered Users Posts: 2,859 ✭✭✭Duckjob


    Put on a curly-haired wig, a prosthetic "beak" nose, and glasses and follow several feet behind him as he walks through town singing loud abusive songs about him on a guitar.


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    #5
    The_Minister
    Registered Users Posts: 10,255 ✭✭✭✭The_Minister


    Casually let slip in the conversation that you are a notably industrialist, and that you are giving work visas to Nigerians, because "they need help, and someone has to care".












    Then tell him you have to back to your caravan now.


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    #6
    stovelid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    Be RB.


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    #7
    Xavi6
    Registered Users Posts: 40,861 ✭✭✭✭Xavi6


    Tell him your name's Dave McSavage and that RB is your U2-fan boi love child.


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    #8
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    Offer him a sandwich for lunch


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    #9
    4zn76tysfajdxp
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭4zn76tysfajdxp


    Graffito (is that right?) a large "Howya Degsy" on the side of his house, surrounded by some pictures of floating sandwiches.


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    #10
    Nerin
    Registered Users Posts: 10,523 ✭✭✭✭Nerin


    Tell him youre RB,but on top of that,that you've been made mod of the cuckoos nest and thunderdome,and hes still banned from the nest,and now from the dome.

    Instant nose danger.


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    #11
    My name is URL
    Registered Users Posts: 25,068 ✭✭✭✭My name is URL


    Pretend you like Bono and offer to but him a breakfast roll from a Polski store


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    #12
    Red Hand
    Registered Users Posts: 4,986 ✭✭✭Red Hand


    Invite him to become the meat in a human sandwich involving Bono and Dave McSavage.


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    #13
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    Tell him we all want to change the dates for Karma again.


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    #14
    PeterLT
    Closed Accounts Posts: 231 ✭✭PeterLT


    TwoShedsJackson wrote: »
    "Lithuanian swan-eating immigrant"

    What? :confused:


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    #15
    JC 2K3
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,794 ✭✭✭JC 2K3


    "Hello, I'm a pedophile"


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    #16
    ronano
    Registered Users Posts: 3,139 ✭✭✭ronano


    I'd sell him a sandwhich


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    #17
    Overheal
    Registered Users Posts: 82,253 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    I'd just walk up to him, confirm that he's Irish and ask if he knows Seamus.


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    #18
    My name is URL
    Registered Users Posts: 25,068 ✭✭✭✭My name is URL


    PeterLT wrote: »
    What? :confused:

    You eat our swans apparently, didn't you know?


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    #19
    Degsy
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,397 ✭✭✭✭Degsy


    You fcuckin people arent right,you know that?:D


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    #20
    Overheal
    Registered Users Posts: 82,253 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    Degsy wrote: »
    You fcuckin people arent right,you know that?:D
    Dont judge me!

    *whack*!


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    #21
    PeterLT
    Closed Accounts Posts: 231 ✭✭PeterLT


    My name is URL wrote: »
    You eat our swans apparently, didn't you know?

    :) No, but I have heard this story with Polish lads...

    I would like to make an official announcement. Lithuanians do not eat Irish, nor other nationality swans. (it's really hard to pluck feathers from them...)

    Though, there are written prove, that Lithuanians were eating crows in 1740, but saying this about swans is blasphemy and I request to stop it immediatlely.

    *BTW Swans aren't so innocent, have you ever been attacked by them while canoeing? You can crap your pants how scary they can be...*


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    #22
    BaileysComet
    Closed Accounts Posts: 56 ✭✭BaileysComet


    PeterLT wrote: »
    *BTW Swans aren't so innocent, have you ever been attacked by them while canoeing? You can crap your pants how scary they can be...*

    I hate/am terrified of swans. They can be vicous b*st*rds when they want to be. All animals defend themelves to a certain degree but some creatures don't stop until they're sure you're never getting up again.


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    #23
    4zn76tysfajdxp
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭4zn76tysfajdxp


    I would also offer him a scholarship to Ballymaloe Cooking School. Specifically, the sandwich making course.


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    #24
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    PeterLT wrote: »
    *BTW Swans aren't so innocent, have you ever been attacked by them while canoeing? You can crap your pants how scary they can be...*

    Can't be having that. don't wear any.


    Yore a real life.. wow. I always thought the LT was some sort of a reference to Volkswagon vans.



    *Whoosh over head*


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    #25
    4zn76tysfajdxp
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭4zn76tysfajdxp


    Abigayle wrote: »
    *Whoosh over head*

    I'd say there's all sorts of "whoosing" going on if you don't wear any trousers.


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    #26
    CianRyan
    Registered Users Posts: 14,721 ✭✭✭✭CianRyan


    What the hell did i miss?!


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    #27
    projectmayhem
    Registered Users Posts: 9,480 ✭✭✭projectmayhem


    CianRyan wrote: »
    What the hell did i miss?!

    Exactly what I was thinking....


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    #28
    PeterLT
    Closed Accounts Posts: 231 ✭✭PeterLT


    Abigayle wrote: »
    Can't be having that. don't wear any.


    Yore a real life.. wow. I always thought the LT was some sort of a reference to Volkswagon vans.



    *Whoosh over head*

    :) Yeah, don't wear any pants... And which part of my body will be chosen to be attacked first? Head? Don't think so...

    Volkswagen van? Nah, they're for hippies. But you're close, VW Golf was called car of the nation at some stage in LT.


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    #29
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    PeterLT wrote: »
    Volkswagen van? Nah, they're for hippies. But you're close, VW Golf was called car of the nation at some stage in LT.
    I know ;)
    Matthew Sticky Raccoon wrote: »
    I'd say there's all sorts of "whooshing" going on if you don't wear any trousers.

    HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHOHOHOHOHO!


    I look rather fabulous actually.


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    #30
    Earthhorse
    Registered Users Posts: 14,714 ✭✭✭✭Earthhorse


    What's Degsy's beef with sandwiches?


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    #31
    Overheal
    Registered Users Posts: 82,253 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    Gluten?


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