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Sum the opposite sex up in one paragraph

  • 22-04-2009 2:59pm
    #1
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭


    Man is in pub with friends.
    Man meets woman. Friends leave.
    Man talks to woman for 2 minutes, she leaves, he goes home seperately.
    Man's friend 'How did you get on with your one last night?'
    Man: 'Ah jays sure I left her with a face...... LIKE A PAINTERS RADIO!!!
    Man's friend: G'way, your a legend!
    :D:D:D


Comments

  • #2
    Professey Chin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,054 ✭✭✭✭Professey Chin


    Women anywhere: "bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip"

    Nothing else needs to be said :D


  • #3
    0ubliette
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,643 ✭✭✭0ubliette


    women: insane


  • #4
    Cuddlesworth
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,012 ✭✭✭✭Cuddlesworth


    Ultimate Chin wrote: »
    Women anywhere: "bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,do I look fat in this?,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip"

    Nothing else needs to be said :D

    fixed it for you.


  • #5
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    Cuddlesworth wrote: »
    fixed it for you.

    I never ever say do I look fat in this.........!

    Cuz I is in good shape. you could crack a nut with my thighs.

    Methinks there be too many men on this forum.....ladies where are you!!


  • #6
    Overheal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 86,729 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    Trouble.


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  • #7
    Kinetic^
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,249 ✭✭✭✭Kinetic^


    Volatile


  • #8
    twinytwo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,410 ✭✭✭twinytwo


    midlandsmissus wrote: »
    I never ever say do I look fat in this.........!

    Cuz I is in good shape. you could crack a nut with my thighs.

    Methinks there be too many men on this forum.....ladies where are you!!

    test is needed:pac:


  • #9
    Professey Chin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,054 ✭✭✭✭Professey Chin


    midlandsmissus wrote: »
    I never ever say do I look fat in this.........!

    Cuz I is in good shape. you could crack a nut with my thighs.

    Methinks there be too many men on this forum.....ladies where are you!!
    Lies.All women do.

    And the ladies lounge


  • #10
    Vain
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,689 ✭✭✭Vain


    Sexy;)


  • #11
    ibarelycare
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 58,456 ✭✭✭✭ibarelycare


    Hairy & yummy :pac:


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  • #12
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    In possession of a penis and testicles. Produces the hormone testosterone.


  • #13
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Soft. Smell Nice. Lovely Hair and Smiles.

    WILL LIE THROUGH THEIR TEETH TO YOUR FACE ABOUT EVERYTHING UNTIL YOU'RE LEFT A BROKEN, HOLLOW SHELL OF A MAN!!!!

    Pretty dresses and lovely laughs too. :)


  • #14
    Lollipops23
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,420 ✭✭✭Lollipops23


    baffling,sexy, sport obsessive, computer game obsessive, flatulent, waaay to comfy with being naked.


  • #15
    OldGoat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,639 ✭✭✭✭OldGoat


    "But we can still be friends"
    :(

    I'm older than Minecraft goats.



  • #16
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    Soft. Smell Nice. Lovely Hair and Smiles.

    WILL LIE THROUGH THEIR TEETH TO YOUR FACE ABOUT EVERYTHING UNTIL YOU'RE LEFT A BROKEN, HOLLOW SHELL OF A MAN!!!!

    Pretty dresses and lovely laughs too. :)

    Ah young love :D


  • #17
    DARKIZE
    Closed Accounts Posts: 79 ✭✭DARKIZE


    Women......you can't live with 'em and you can't kill 'em.


    Still love them though.


  • #18
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    Dudess wrote: »
    In possession of a penis and testicles. Produces the hormone testosterone.

    I likes yore style


  • #19
    allabouteve
    Closed Accounts Posts: 844 ✭✭✭allabouteve


    Self-misrepresenting manipulators feigning interest in lasting relationships while seeking short-term (very, very short) sexual gratification.


    Not all, but many.


  • #20
    MilkyMOOO
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5 ✭MilkyMOOO


    Women........ If they did'nt have a fanny they would'nt have a friend in the world..(runs for hills)


  • #21
    veryangryman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,660 ✭✭✭veryangryman


    OldGoat wrote: »
    "But we can still be friends"
    :(

    That one always kills... :pac:


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  • #22
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    Ultimate Chin wrote: »
    Women anywhere: "bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip,bitch,gossip"

    Nothing else needs to be said :D

    Men anywhere: Either bïtching about women or trying to lamp 'em.




    ;)


  • #23
    Inter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 635 ✭✭✭Inter


    All but one are completely friendly and forgiving.


  • #24
    itsallaboutheL
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,333 ✭✭✭✭itsallaboutheL


    Wonderfully caring creatures especially fond of feeding toothless donkeys


  • #25
    Kieo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 441 ✭✭Kieo


    diy course and a vibrator
    ( how to replace a man) :cool:


  • #26
    stevelknievel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 170 ✭✭stevelknievel


    allabouteve wrote: »
    Self-misrepresenting manipulators feigning interest in lasting relationships while seeking short-term (very, very short) sexual gratification.

    Anger, fear, aggression; the dark side of the Force are they. If once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will....Apparently.

    Women! You can't beat them.....Unfortunately:D


  • #27
    taidghbaby
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,746 ✭✭✭taidghbaby


    tits & ass


  • #28
    Inter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 635 ✭✭✭Inter


    Human after all :eek:


  • #29
    p1akuw47h5r3it
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,001 ✭✭✭p1akuw47h5r3it


    MilkyMOOO wrote: »
    Women........ If they did'nt have a fanny they would'nt have a friend in the world..(runs for hills)

    Best sayin I've heard ina while... nice one.

    And come back from the hills.


  • #30
    Fago!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,647 ✭✭✭✭Fago!


    midlandsmissus wrote: »
    I never ever say do I look fat in this.........!

    Cuz I is in good shape. you could crack a nut with my thighs.

    Marry Me


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  • #31
    Lobelia Overhill
    Closed Accounts Posts: 704 ✭✭✭Lobelia Overhill


    men like to drink the beer, watch the football and look at the boobies

    (with thanks to Joss Wheedon)


  • #32
    colrow
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭colrow


    I think there are all lovely


  • #33
    cherryghost
    Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 17,137 Mod ✭✭✭✭cherryghost


    confusing, demanding, over-emotional, yet smart, sexy, funny and everything else thats good in the world :pac:


  • #34
    stevelknievel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 170 ✭✭stevelknievel


    As a species, you are beautiful, you're amazing, you're fantstic. But individually, you're focking hard work

    (credit to Tommy Tiernan. I think)


  • #35
    randylonghorn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,509 ✭✭✭✭randylonghorn


    Dudess wrote: »
    In possession of a penis and testicles. Produces the hormone testosterone.
    In possession of a vagina and ovaries. Produces the hormone oestrogen.

    :p


  • #36
    Black Swan
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,537 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    Ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny


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  • #37
    MonicaBing
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 611 ✭✭✭MonicaBing


    Lollipops23 wrote: »
    baffling,sexy, sport obsessive, computer game obsessive, flatulent, waaay to comfy with being naked.

    Em, hello baby, i didnt know you were a member of Boards......:p


  • #38
    randylonghorn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,509 ✭✭✭✭randylonghorn


    Swallows dictionaries, talks double-dutch! >.<


  • #39
    Black Swan
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,537 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    randy long horn


  • #40
    Inter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 635 ✭✭✭Inter


    Unpredictably unpredictable - which I suppose is the same as predictably predictable.


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