Coping With V-Day

Volvoboy

Yes i know i shall have a pain in my spoke by the end of Saturday, as will may others.

My Plan;

Morning, sleep in till 1pm.

Daytime, look on this thread to reinforce my haterid.

Evening, load up the I-pod will break up songs (he's a cheating foooker songs) head out to work, play them to the smoochie couples that get in, then promptly tell them that 89% of the population has a STI*




*probably not true



How will you cope with the day?

*cry and fap*

phasers

I don't get bothered by a non-holiday. Why aren't you sad about being painfully single for the other 364 days?

arybvtcw0eolkf

Volvoboy wrote: »

How will you cope with the day?

*cry and fap*

I'll have a **** and confess my undying love for a cock, who at almost 43yrs old still never fails to shine.



.

Creamy Goodness

Mairt wrote: »

I'll have a **** and confess my undying love for a cock, who at almost 43yrs old still never fails to shine.



.

here here,

this is me although alter the age a tad.

Michellenman

Valentines days and V-day are actually completely different things.

By sheer coincidence, it would seem, TODAY is v-day, apparently unbeknownst to you. What're the chances?!

V-day is a day marked to raise awareness of violence against women. They're holding charity events and what not in college today.

Kinda off topic but oh well: Saw a chap in college today, well into his 40's, strolling around, heavily obese, acne, greasy, sweat patches, the lot. Wearing a t-shirt in aid of V-day sporting the slogan ''Vagina Warrior''. Don't think he'll be battling any vaginas anytime soon.



Edit:http://newsite.vday.org/

Local-womanizer

Mairt wrote: »

I'll have a **** and confess my undying love for a cock, who at almost 43yrs old still never fails to shine.



.

Hit the nail on the head.Thats what I'll be at.

MagicMarker

Local-womanizer wrote: »

Hit the nail on the head

You did!?!:eek:

That's just mean.

Sir Gallagher

I'm gonna pop over to the girlfriend's, give her her card and chocolates and sit in with a nice bottle of wine.
As the evening progresses, i will then proceed to give her the most loveless ride possible.

arybvtcw0eolkf

Imagine that - I get 'thanked' for posting about having a **** by a user named 'creamy Goodness'

Brilliant!.

.

arybvtcw0eolkf

Sir Gallagher wrote: »

I'm gonna pop over to the girlfriend's

What time are you planning on getting there?...

Local-womanizer

MagicMarker wrote: »

You did!?!:eek:

That's just mean.

It was sore aswell.I was in A+E all evening:(

Creamy Goodness

Michellenman wrote: »

Valentines days and V-day are actually completely different things.

By sheer coincidence, it would seem, TODAY is v-day, apparently unbeknownst to you. What're the chances?!

V-day is a day marked to raise awareness of violence against women. They're holding charity events and what not in college today.

Kinda off topic but oh well: Saw a chap in college today, well into his 40's, strolling around, heavily obese, acne, greasy, sweat patches, the lot. Wearing a t-shirt in aid of V-day sporting the slogan ''Vagina Warrior''. Don't think he'll be battling any vaginas anytime soon.



Edit:http://newsite.vday.org/

get back in the kitchen or feel the back of my hand.

Sir Gallagher

Mairt wrote: »

What time are you planning on getting there?...

About 8, so you better be gone by 6 just so she can wash herself.

m5ex9oqjawdg2i

Bottle of vodka, razor blades and a pair of rists....

Tea-a-Maria

A dictionary might be useful too.:pac:

super_furry

It's Saturday, get drunk.

Davidius

What is this 'wuv' you speak of!?

The_Minister

This 'wuv' enrages and confuses us!



Oh, andd we should have had a boards singles night again.

Piste

I'll be sitting an exam, being taken out to lunch by my mum, taking my boyfriend to the cinema that night, and be taken to dinner by him.







/smug.

Kinetic^

Watch the footie and rugby, then when she gets home......have food and watch a romantic movie, hopefully Star Wars.

WoollyRedHat

I propose a ban on Valentine's day.

Who said that?

Sleipnir

Kinetic^ wrote: »

Watch the footie and rugby, then when she gets home......have food and watch a romantic movie, hopefully Star Wars.

Awww, Star Wars. That big wookie would would get anyone all gooey.

I'm celebrating by going on a big bender with a load of mates. My girlfriend will drop me off but as I won't be finished till the next day (probably) she needn't pick me up. I'll make my own way home.

Professey Chin

WoollyRedHat wrote: »

I propose a ban on Valentine's day.

Who said that?

I did :mad:

WoollyRedHat

Well kill him then!

qz

Kinetic^ wrote: »

Watch the footie and rugby, then when she gets home......have food and watch a romantic movie, hopefully Star Wars.

Can I be your girlfriend

tolosenc

Coppers...

Thrill

Kinetic^ wrote: »

Watch the footie and rugby, then when she gets home......have food and watch a romantic movie, hopefully Star Wars.

Who said romance was dead.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Porn, football, hookers, mass, coke.

The_Minister

obl wrote: »

Coppers...

You genius.

Tom Trojan

Buy her perfume. Then you get to enjoy it too.

Working the night shift and staying 130km away, the missus wont be happy...

S.I.R

Volvoboy wrote: »

Yes i know i shall have a pain in my spoke by the end of Saturday, as will may others.

My Plan;

Morning, sleep in till 1pm.

Daytime, look on this thread to reinforce my haterid.

Evening, load up the I-pod will break up songs (he's a cheating foooker songs) head out to work, play them to the smoochie couples that get in, then promptly tell them that 89% of the population has a STI*




*probably not true



How will you cope with the day?

*cry and fap*

atleast your not paying hundreds for a crappy meal in a over priced resturant, then going to a gig to which you hate the band, then off for drink, of whic are all on you, then if shes not too drunk you just might get laid...


Enjoy the single life while you can.

kowloon

Mairt wrote: »

I'll have a **** and confess my undying love for a cock, who at almost 43yrs old still never fails to shine.



.

Whose cock is this then?

Sex me up army boy :P.

Turd Ferguson

Bond marathon!!!!

Eric Cartman

get drunk and pick up ugly birds with low self esteem down the pub, then kick them out in the morning and tell everyone they were ****

davyjose

Deleted User wrote: »

Working the night shift and staying 130km away, the missus wont be happy...

Oh, I'm sure she'll be just fine.... :P (<----by the way, that's not for you )

LeahBaby

I'm cooking fillet steak and new york cheesescake for my boyfriend and watching the friday the 13th boxset I bought him and will probably do dirty things while he watches it.

I'm a good gf!!

*His name is Chris Brown.

davyjose

LeahBaby wrote: »

watching the friday the 13th boxset I bought him and will probably do dirty things while he watches it.

I'm a good gf!!

What, how shall I put it ... avant garde tastes you both have!!! :eek:

themadchef

Lads if yee have to say i love ya let me roide ya with €80 roses and a €200 dinner RUN while there's still time

I'm working thank God... but if you love her, it's the small things that count every day..not the big gestures.




Put your smelly sock in the washing machine, and every now and then switch the fecker on.

Put the toilet seat lid back down, and possibly improve your aim.

Smile through Cornation street for once it wont kill you...you know i want you to talk to me baby but does it always have to be now?

Sex..it's not a race.

Put the cordless drill down, you know you will hurt yourself.

Doing house work does not make ur dick shrink, wearing those rubber gloves may infact turn me on.

While i love your snoring dearly, i often think i may just smother you, please turn over after the second kick.

ejmaztec

LeahBaby wrote: »

I'm cooking fillet steak and new york cheesescake for my boyfriend and watching the friday the 13th boxset I bought him and will probably do dirty things while he watches it.

I'm a good gf!!

*His name is Chris Brown.

I can't think where I heard that name before - it just seems such a familiar name for a fella-ella-ella-ella. :P

Turd Ferguson

Mairt wrote: »

I'll have a **** and confess my undying love for a cock, who at almost 43yrs old still never fails to shine.
.

It's Valentines Day, you may as well have a posh ****. You deserve it :pac:

OldGoat

themadchef wrote: »

Put the toilet seat lid back down, and possibly improve your aim.

The aim is always good, it the viarable pressure that causes mishaps.
And when will women ever learn to lift the toilet seat up when they are finished using it?

themadchef wrote: »

Sex..it's not a race.

You're right, she is no competation at all, I always win.

themadchef wrote: »

Doing house work does not make ur dick shrink, wearing those rubber gloves may infact turn me on.

Works for me too.:rolleyes:

IvySlayer

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

It's Valentines Day, you may as well have a posh ****. You deserve it :pac:

What, stick the pinky out while ****?

OldGoat

IvySlayer wrote: »

What, stick the pinky out while ****?

No, just use your other hand. It's a whole new sensation, familar yet somehow different.

RxQueen

wont see himself, hate valentines anyways, what a load of crap ..

shall treat it as anyother saturday, why should it be soo different..

UGH hate that way people turn into bitches if they dont get flowers or whatever.. wrecks my head

homerun_homer

OldGoat wrote: »

No, just use your other hand. It's a whole new sensation, familar yet somehow different.

That's just cheating:eek:

Turd Ferguson

IvySlayer wrote: »

What, stick the pinky out while ****?

No no no, its **** while wearing a condom. Have you never done that before? You dont know what you're missing

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=posh+****

ejmaztec

emo!! wrote: »

wont see himself, hate valentines anyways, what a load of crap ..

shall treat it as anyother saturday, why should it be soo different..

UGH hate that way people turn into bitches if they dont get flowers or whatever.. wrecks my head

Sounds to me like you're fed up sending flowers to yourself every year 'cause your bf's got amnesia.

RxQueen

ejmaztec wrote: »

Sounds to me like you're fed up sending flowers to yourself every year 'cause your bf's got amnesia.

yeah your da , is getting on in age, he cant remember lil dates like V-day :rolleyes:

Dudess

S.I.R wrote: »

atleast your not paying hundreds for a crappy meal in a over priced resturant, then going to a gig to which you hate the band, then off for drink, of whic are all on you, then if shes not too drunk you just might get laid...


Enjoy the single life while you can.

Aren't you like 16 or something?

John Mason

i will be cooking a five course meal for 6 people

i cant believe i offered to do this, i feel knackered at the thought of it