I got felt up last night!

brianthebard

:eek:

From now on, keep your hands to yourself wimmin, I am not an object!

Berty

Where do you go?

I would not mind getting felt up by some slut.

you loved it, I could see the happiness in your eyes

Kinetic^

Did she have a long stick and sunglasses?

c'mon, dont slag the blind people, they'll get offended when they read it

stovelid

Touching yourself doesn't count.

brianthebard

Berty wrote: »

Where do you go?

I would not mind getting felt up by some slut.

I stood there, horrified! (waiting for my drink) And she wasn't really a slut, I don't think so anyways. She was quite a bit older though. She made her friend touch me too, oh its all coming back to me now! *sobs in the corner*

Trinity

brianthebard wrote: »

I stood there, horrified! (waiting for my drink) And she wasn't really a slut, I don't think so anyways. She was quite a bit older though. She made her friend touch me too, oh its all coming back to me now! *sobs in the corner*

Bingo club?

speaktofrank

brianthebard wrote: »

:eek:

From now on, keep your hands to yourself wimmin, I am not an object!

Good night in the George was it?
You sure it was a woman? :cool:

themadchef

But youre supposed to think of it as a compliment right?

Your jeans were a little too tight, it just needed adjusting. Youre only up set because i found the pair of socks. It's ok. Not like i'll tell anyone

Any way, if youre going around singing Sam foxes "Touch me, touch me" and thrusting like you have a baby elephant down there...you were begging for it baby lol.

Mimikyu

This post has been deleted.

brianthebard

themadchef wrote: »

But youre supposed to think of it as a compliment right?

Your jeans were a little too tight, it just needed adjusting. Youre only up set because i found the pair of socks. It's ok. Not like i'll tell anyone

Any way, if youre going around singing Sam foxes "Touch me, touch me" and thrusting like you have a baby elephant down there...you were begging for it baby lol.

This is a very elaborate post, you must have been touching someone last night, although I don't think it was me.

Are you sure it wasn't an accident.
I was just walking down the street, minding my own business with swingy arms.
There is a guy trying to overtake me.
Next thing I'm a molester and he is disturbed.
Awkward.

brianthebard

Lolz she wasn't touching my junk...at least I don't she did. I was drunk, everything is hazy...shotgunnin is baaaad.

monkeyfudge

Check your underpants.... are they still on the right way around?

themadchef

brianthebard wrote: »

Lolz she wasn't touching my junk...at least I don't she did. I was drunk, everything is hazy...shotgunnin is baaaad.

Do you have a chunky bum? If it was a two handed "fwarrrr" job... missed opportunity on your part .


And the reason you didint turn around, put both hands in the air and say "help yourself" was? Your letting the lads down here Brian

S.I.R

brianthebard wrote: »

:eek:

From now on, keep your hands to yourself wimmin, I am not an object!

Them grannys at bingo are feisty i tells ya :rolleyes:

brianthebard

themadchef wrote: »

And the reason you didint turn around, put both hands in the air and say "help yourself" was? Your letting the lads down here Brian

Cause I'm not a piece of meat! Damn drunken sleazy women. She wanted me to shave as well, cheek!

projectmayhem

Why are you assuming it was a girl? Did you feel back to make sure?

S.I.R

projectmayhem wrote: »

Why are you assuming it was a girl? Did you feel back to make sure?

hmmm the kinda girl who you have to givea flaming zambooka or such to get the top lip hair off her/him.... ??? :pac:

dlofnep

monkeyfudge wrote: »

Check your underpants.... are they still on the right way around?

..or replaced with granny-panties.

DarkJager

brianthebard wrote: »

Cause I'm not a piece of meat! Damn drunken sleazy women. She wanted me to shave as well, cheek!

Shave your balls or your face?

brianthebard

dlofnep wrote: »

..or replaced with granny-panties.

I have neither on!

DarkJager wrote: »

Shave your balls or your face?

Maybe both! :eek:

trout

so ... did you get her number ?

minidazzler

Did ya go back to her gaff????

She felt you up, you talked to her, she started telling you how you should look. The is obviously your future ex wife.

Trinity

trout wrote: »

so ... did you get her number ?

He can look her up

http://www.goldenpages.ie/search/dublin_/nursing_home.html

Steve

brianthebard wrote: »

I was drunk, everything is hazy...shotgunnin is baaaad.

Yep, the old 'I was drunk' excuse.:rolleyes:

So, did you have to chew your own arm off this morning or what?:D

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

JFC, 28 posts and noone asks for pics or tells him to GTFO....

Berty

I havent decided yet if I would shave my pubic area for a shag or was is the pubic area?

Your as*?

Your hairy hands?

brianthebard

SteveC wrote: »

Yep, the old 'I was drunk' excuse.:rolleyes:

So, did you have to chew your own arm off this morning or what?:D

Nope as soon as my pint came I was out of there.

javaboy

Ha! You just got pickpocketed by a sleight of hand merchant my friend. Have you still got your wallet, phone and kidneys?

Abi

brianthebard wrote: »

Lolz she wasn't touching my junk...

Strange girl. What exactly did she feel up then?

Trinity

brianthebard wrote: »

Nope as soon as I came I was out of there.

FYP

brianthebard

Abigayle wrote: »

Strange girl. What exactly did she feel up then?

My arms...

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

javaboy wrote: »

Ha! You just got pickpocketed by a sleight of hand merchant my friend. Have you still got your wallet, phone and kidneys?

In fairness, he never had any of those things in the first place.

Dord

brianthebard wrote: »

My arms...

Who are you, ralph wiggum?

EKRIUQ

Are you sure it wasn't Yore Ma when you came home?

sassa

brianthebard wrote: »

:eek:

From now on, keep your hands to yourself wimmin, I am not an object!

brianthebard wrote: »

I stood there, horrified! (waiting for my drink) *sobs in the corner*

brianthebard wrote: »

Cause I'm not a piece of meat! Damn drunken sleazy women. She wanted me to shave as well, cheek!

brianthebard wrote: »

Nope as soon as my pint came I was out of there.

brianthebard wrote: »

My arms...

are you used to having a chaperone with you when you go out?

Abi

Dord wrote: »

Who are you, ralph wiggum?

*snigger*

/raises eyebrow @ OP

.>.>

Trinity1

Trinity1 wrote: »

Bingo club?

O that comment reminds me of that epic thread.

*Goes and looks for it*

humbert

There's nothing worse than gropy auld wimmin. *Shudders

tipp86

Got felt up meself !!Pulled a young and brought her home, next morning her friend jumps in to the bed with a naked me and starts feeling ....... happy days

brag no 2 - The girl i pulled was bi sexual , wouldnt drop her or the friend home until they kissed full on.

Epic night had by all

humbert

tipp86 wrote: »

Got felt up meself !!Pulled a young and brought her home, next morning her friend jumps in to the bed with a naked me and starts feeling ....... happy days

brag no 2 - The girl i pulled was bi sexual , wouldnt drop her or the friend home until they kissed full on.

Epic night had by all

They were girl sheep weren't they tipp?

Abi

tipp86 wrote: »

Got felt up meself !!Pulled a young and brought her home, next morning her friend jumps in to the bed with a naked me and starts feeling ....... happy days

brag no 2 - The girl i pulled was bi sexual , wouldnt drop her or the friend home until they kissed full on.

Epic night had by all

Now thats what I expected when I opened this thread.

An enthralling read. Adventurous AND with sexy time.

Utter b0ll0x of course. ;-)

DarkJager

tipp86 wrote: »

Got felt up meself !!Pulled a young and brought her home, next morning her friend jumps in to the bed with a naked me and starts feeling ....... happy days

brag no 2 - The girl i pulled was bi sexual , wouldnt drop her or the friend home until they kissed full on.

Epic night had by all

Wait wait wait....you were balls naked, in a bed, with 2 bisexual women....and all you wanted to do was see them kiss??? WTF?

Dord

DarkJager wrote: »

Wait wait wait....you were balls naked, in a bed, with 2 bisexual women....and all you wanted to do was see them kiss??? WTF?

Yeah, that just proves that its utter crap!

Browney7

You should get onto Liveline on monday.
Joe will get to the bottom of this;)

Turncoat

Surprisingly there have been 47 posts and no one has asked the OP this -
"was she hot? was her friend hot? were they both swedish blondes?"

Harolds+

If you had 10 mickeys would you give her one

banshee_bones

what establishment were you in?

Trinity

humbert wrote: »

There's nothing worse than gropy auld wimmin. *Shudders

Oh i dunno, the fact that they can take their teeth out has to be a bonus.

Everyone knows the lemonade brigade are hoes when they go out in groups, and the fact that they are old means they can do what they like, old people always get their own way