I hate women

LegacyUser

Hi All

6 months ago I broke up with my Girlfriend of a year and a half as I was being basically walked all over. I did love her but it was just to stressful as she was very high maintenance and towards the end of the relationship she was treating me like property.

Anyway, all my friends are seeing people so I have spent most of the time on my own. So I decided after 3 months to get back out there and meet people. But I'm having real trouble.

The Girl I broke up with was my first Girlfriend ever (I'm 25 btw) and not to sound big headed I now see myself as an excellent judge of character. I feel I can tell exactly what a girl is like after talking to her for just 15 min. And the prognosis is not good. Of all the women I have met and talked to they are all like my previous Girlfriend (thats out of approx 10 women all from different groups of friends with different backgrounds and met them in different places) The Characteristics that I see in all of them straight away are as follows:
Controlling
Moany when they don't get there own way
Materialistic
Shallow
and Self absorbed

And they above seriously put me off, it doesn't matter to me how good looking the girl is or even if she just wants a one nighter (I'm not into that anyway) I'm terrified of ending up where I was this time last year and the scariest thing of all is that it seems all women are like this. I can't go back to that.

And even MORE worryingly I'm not a big going out person anymore. so its even more difficult to meet good people.

It's gotten to the point where I just do not like, trust or have respect for women anymore. And I know that a terrible thing but its the truth. For example last night I was in a club with two Lads and their Girlfriends (I was a total third wheel) anyway I'm at the bar and this very good looking girl starts talking to me, after about 2 min I had her figured out and I know the inevitable question was coming "will you buy me a drink?" I got her a Pint of water, told her she was a slag and then told her to F-Off.

Now that is unbelievable for me! I couldn't believe I said that, I would NEVER have said something like that to anyone a couple of years ago. but here I am now, this angry person

I don't wanna be like this, but unfortunately I just can't do Irish women
Is there any other guys that feel this way or did feel this way?
How do I stop this?

MIN2511

1. Don't generalise all Irish women, they are not all the same
2. Because one woman used you and left you in pieces does not mean all women would do the same.
3. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and make an effort to socialise, pity most of your mates are in relationships but you can make new friends(work, boards beers, gym)
4. You are only 25, what is the hurry? Do you really need another relationship? Why not just enjoy the single life?



Foreign women can be bitches too! Some of them are the biggest spongers ever! No kidding, i wont genaralise but i have heard a few about some foreign wimmins... They also mess with your head if you are not careful

Miss Fluff

Unregistered wrote: »

I now see myself as an excellent judge of character. I feel I can tell exactly what a girl is like after talking to her for just 15 min. And the prognosis is not good. Of all the women I have met and talked to they are all like my previous Girlfriend (thats out of approx 10 women all from different groups of friends with different backgrounds

Highly coincidental that each and every girl was the same eh?:rolleyes:

15 minutes would definitely give you ample opportunity to make a full unbiased judgements on every dimension of one's character too it seems.;)

You have A LOT of growing up to do buddy. I'd advise being single for a year or two, get to grips with who you are and then you may be in a position to enter an adult relationship. As it stands, you come accross as way too juvenile to enter into or sustain any kind of mature relationship.

LegacyUser

Miss Fluff wrote: »

15 minutes would definitely give you ample opportunity to make a full unbiased judgements on every dimension of one's character too it seems.;)

Well they say first impressions are everything right?. I will admit that of the 10 or so I've talked to 2 seemed down to earth(ish) but they just seem so "fake". If ya know that I mean?

Miss Fluff wrote: »

You have A LOT of growing up to do buddy. I'd advise being single for a year or two, get to grips with who you are and then you may be in a position to enter an adult relationship. As it stands, you come accross as way too juvenile to enter into or sustain any kind of mature relationship.

Perhaps your right. but personally I wouldn't consider myself to be juvenile. The being single thing is probably the correct route but as most of my friends are seeing people it means I'm going to be spending a lot of my time on my own. which is ok but not great really ya know?
But I do think I will have t figure out what I want, How can I not trust women but yet want to be seeing one? Its a contradiction on itself!

Piste

Have you considered maybe you're not the excellent judge of chaacter you thought you were? It seems that because your ex messed you around you're looknig for the same characteristics in other girls, so you could be taking a perfectly innocuous statement or action and seeing it as a symptom of them being stuck up. Maybe don't be so quick to judge girls and look at the girls you meet from different angles.

Kirnsy

Unregistered wrote: »

I now see myself as an excellent judge of character.

I feel I can tell exactly what a girl is like after talking to her for just 15 min.

contradiction much??:rolleyes:

girls seem to you as:

Unregistered wrote: »

Controlling
Moany when they don't get there own way
Materialistic
Shallow
and Self absorbed

but yet apparently you...

Unregistered wrote: »

do not like, trust or have respect for women anymore.

FINALLY

Unregistered wrote: »

For example last night I was in a club with two Lads and their Girlfriends (I was a total third wheel) anyway I'm at the bar and this very good looking girl starts talking to me, after about 2 min I had her figured out and I know the inevitable question was coming "will you buy me a drink?" I got her a Pint of water, told her she was a slag and then told her to F-Off.

..... maybe YOU are coming across in a slightly negative way??


i think you need to grow up. when you're mature you can date nice people

cantdecide

Waggy fingers- my favourite.

OP, you are being unreasonable. The 'slag' incident? Whoa bud, time for a time out! Not all women are the same so don't let one bad one turn you into a misogynist. If the same pulling practises are turning up largely similar traits in your prospects 1) change the location and 2) change the type of women you are looking for.

Buzz Buzz

Mate, I'd take a long look in the mirror and realise your the common denominator between all these women.. and your blaming them!? You sound fairly moany, self absorbed and shallow yourself, and pretty arrogant to boot. And calling a girl you have just met a slag and telling her to fu@k off, with no real cause to do so, displays a real lack of maturity and respect for others.

I suggest you start examining the emotions that have developed from ending your past relationship as it seems the resentment your holding for your last girlfriend is spilling over into your relatioships with other women.

You know, despite what you think, its not them that has the bad attitude.. its you.

herya

You need to go out more.

OR

Go ghey!

LostinBlanch

Well I wouldn't put it quite that way. But I'll say that the op sounds like he still hasn't got over the last gf. Nothing wrong in that, time will sort him out there. But right now he's projecting his feelings about his previous gf onto other women he knows. And do you know what? Right now it looks like he's getting exactly what he's looking for.

OP as facetious as this may sound right now, chill out and stop looking for a direct replacement for your last gf. If you do this, the chances of you finding someone as good as, or even better than your last gf increase big time. I can't say when you'll meet her, that's down to you, but good luck with it.

towel401

Unregistered wrote: »

For example last night I was in a club with two Lads and their Girlfriends (I was a total third wheel) anyway I'm at the bar and this very good looking girl starts talking to me, after about 2 min I had her figured out and I know the inevitable question was coming "will you buy me a drink?" I got her a Pint of water, told her she was a slag and then told her to F-Off.

Now that is unbelievable for me! I couldn't believe I said that, I would NEVER have said something like that to anyone a couple of years ago. but here I am now, this angry person

I don't wanna be like this, but unfortunately I just can't do Irish women
Is there any other guys that feel this way or did feel this way?
How do I stop this?

i like your style. this was actually a good idea. any girl who tries to mooch free drinks in such a way deserves that. but they not all like that. just most of them. especially in those sort of places

Pyr0

The problem isn't the women you've been talking to, sadly its you ! Jesus christ, yeah you've been treated badly by your ex but does that give you an excuse to treat other "similar" women like sh1t based purely on a 15 minute conversation you have with them ?

Perfect judge of character ? Get over yourself. I can make a pretty good judge of character based on your post, not very fair is it ? No one becomes an expert judge of character after having their heartbroken by the first love, 25 years old or not.

LegacyUser

Ah young skywalker, young you are,much learning you have to do.What is the lowest common denominator in all of the scenario's YOU have encountered to date??? The answer lies within YOU.You can only change one person...

May I make a suggestion and please feel free to reject it.

Teach others how to treat you, how you would like to be treated.
ie Treat yourself as you would like others to treat you.

Finally one last question? Making comparsions, what does it get for you, what purpose does it ultimately achieve for you.

You now know what you don't want a in partner, the question now becomes what do you want.And really really really really go for it.

Tired now, sleep must I do now.

Don't be too hard on the wimmenz, we all mirror each other.
evol dna ecaep htiw uoy gninraw mI

RedXIV

sorry OP, but as Pyr0 says, the issue here sounds like you. There are plenty of women out there who would make any guy happy and by the sounds of your handling of the drink situation, you're in no mood to meet any of them. There are a wide variety of ways i could nit pick at your post but i think you're best bet is
1. don't believe you're an excellent judge of character, especially on nights out, most people change.
2. get over the damage your ex did, i know it's tough but you aren't gonna give any woman a chance till you do.
3. learn to enjoy yourself again. and to trust women, there's not ALL bad

MagicMarker

Sorry OP, but you're completely and utterly delusional. You were treated like crap and now you're projecting the feelings you have for your ex onto all women.

Methinks it's time for you to stop wallowing in self pity and grow up, the only person you're hurting in the long run is yourself.

banshee_bones

cantdecide wrote: »

1) change the location and 2) change the type of women you are looking for.

+1

go join some clubs, get out more, broaden your social circle, oh and try and give someone longer than 15 minutes okay?

Kintarō Hattori

Unregistered wrote: »

I got her a Pint of water, told her she was a slag and then told her to F-Off.

OP you know not every woman is bad, things just don't work like that. Many people are involved in long happy relationships where they treat each other with respect and get along just fine.

You say you can size any woman up in 15 minutes, you say that you hate women, you buy a woman a pint of water, tell her she's a slag and then to f*ck off.

I can only surmize that the problem lays firmly at your door. You had a bad previous relationship and you are letting this one woman cloud your view of every other woman. If you want things to change you will need to look yourself in the mirror and see what you can start changing about yourself.
Your perception of the ladies is not accurate. Perhaps you move in a bad social circle? Alot of guys will tell you that they never met their partner at a club. They meet someone through friends or through a hobby. A club is not really the place to go and look for potential girlfriend material.

If you want things to improve you are going to need to change your perception and how you do things socially.

pseudonym1

I'm sorry your ex hurt you so! Maybe disbandon the notion of starting a relationship. Get to know someone become friends first. As for tarnishing all women with the same brush- its not fair on them or yourself.
Take some you time develop and get to know yourself all over again- it will be time well spent. IF it is consuming you this much perhaps a professional is the best person to help you atm

Best of luck

Leprachaun

Unregistered wrote: »

The Characteristics that I see in all of them straight away are as follows:
Controlling
Moany when they don't get there own way
Materialistic
Shallow
and Self absorbed

Oh so the same traits as the entire human race then?

Dublinstiofán

Listen to 'Galway Girl' and take the hint.Lot to be said for a good owl Country girl.
From what ive seen they treat guys a lot better. Maybe its because they don't have the same selection of guys as the girls in Dublin, i don't know.

Not that i'm knocking the Dubs theres plenty of good ones too, just might need a change if you have been with a Controlling, Materialistic, Shallow and Self absorbed Dub.

unhappycamper

Sorry to hear you are sick of woman at the moment but really it is not just Irish woman or woman for that matter it's just your experiences with the people you have already dated. I know you know you over reacted with the girl talking to you at the bar scenario but if you would consider this for a moment. Firstly, not many guys have girls chatting to them so be happy about that and secondly in the Irish pub scene buying a girl a drink is a way of spending time talking to the girl within the club or social scene, look at it like an excuse to get to know one-another. Please OP don't make it out like every girl wants something just because she expects you to buy her a drink. It is courtesy to buy your friends or a new acquaintance a drink after all. Anyway I chat people up from time to time and offer to buy them a drink, what's the big deal? What is really getting to you is there something else?

metrovelvet

First of all, you should not be dating, scoring, whatever while you are feeling like this. You may actually fall for someone and lash out at them unbenknowingly.

I can understand how this is happenning. When you are with someone, something archtypal happens where they start to embody all of their gender and you see their gender through the prism of that person. So this seems quite normal to me for you to be angry at women, since your ex treated you so badly.

It will take you a long long time to disentagle your feelings for her from all other women, your rage, your need for petty little revenges, your desperation for one woman to prove you wrong about your prejudices.

Also believing is seeing. You will seek and find things to back up your perceptions. Take a time out - a long one. Be good to yourself.

wylo

Op you must be bad at talking to women because most other people get different traits out of women,
Emotional
Thoughtful
Smart
Considerate
Funny
Look good!!!

Yes your a great judge of character alright.

Caryatnid

OP you consider yourself an excellent judge of character, yet you seem to be bad at time calculations.

You were with your gf for a year and a half, which actually consists of lots of fifteen minutes - yet you stayed with this person even though she 'walked all over' you. I suggest that actually you are not such a good judge of character as you think you are.

I agree with the sentiment of the rest of the posters. If all women were as you perceive them to be - they would all be single as the male population wouldn't be interested in such mean people.

Dragan

Unregistered wrote: »

Hi All

6 months ago I broke up with my Girlfriend of a year and a half as I was being basically walked all over. I did love her but it was just to stressful as she was very high maintenance and towards the end of the relationship she was treating me like property.

Anyway, all my friends are seeing people so I have spent most of the time on my own. So I decided after 3 months to get back out there and meet people. But I'm having real trouble.

The Girl I broke up with was my first Girlfriend ever (I'm 25 btw) and not to sound big headed I now see myself as an excellent judge of character. I feel I can tell exactly what a girl is like after talking to her for just 15 min. And the prognosis is not good. Of all the women I have met and talked to they are all like my previous Girlfriend (thats out of approx 10 women all from different groups of friends with different backgrounds and met them in different places) The Characteristics that I see in all of them straight away are as follows:
Controlling
Moany when they don't get there own way
Materialistic
Shallow
and Self absorbed

And they above seriously put me off, it doesn't matter to me how good looking the girl is or even if she just wants a one nighter (I'm not into that anyway) I'm terrified of ending up where I was this time last year and the scariest thing of all is that it seems all women are like this. I can't go back to that.

And even MORE worryingly I'm not a big going out person anymore. so its even more difficult to meet good people.

It's gotten to the point where I just do not like, trust or have respect for women anymore. And I know that a terrible thing but its the truth. For example last night I was in a club with two Lads and their Girlfriends (I was a total third wheel) anyway I'm at the bar and this very good looking girl starts talking to me, after about 2 min I had her figured out and I know the inevitable question was coming "will you buy me a drink?" I got her a Pint of water, told her she was a slag and then told her to F-Off.

Now that is unbelievable for me! I couldn't believe I said that, I would NEVER have said something like that to anyone a couple of years ago. but here I am now, this angry person

I don't wanna be like this, but unfortunately I just can't do Irish women
Is there any other guys that feel this way or did feel this way?
How do I stop this?

A couple of points.

You allowed yourself to be treated like property. Generally speaking after a break up is that painful time when you need to look at yourself in the context of that relationship and figure out what went wrong.

You are a big boy and well able to look after yourself. You just made the mistake of holding on for the sake of love, it happens, especially with first relationships.

My second point would be that you don't appear to have moved on much. Claiming every woman you have met is like your ex and mentioning that you are still obviously scared of getting hurt tells me your not over your old relationship. Hell, you even say you went looking for women because you were basically bored.

As far as the whole figuring people out in 15 mins thing, generally speaking when i meet someone i will know at a grass routes level what kind of person they are. I just have a gift for people, sometimes i'm wrong but mostly i'm right. It's something i have picked up through knowng a vast amount of characters and people and putting myself into situations where i would be dealing with massively varied personality types.

It's not the kind of things you get good at because you got dumped.

Now then, with regards to your behaviour that has shocked you, there is only one way to stop that and you know what it is.

So, my advices, get over your girlfriend and get over yourself. Because right now you are borderline asshole because you are still pining. Thats the kind of rubbish that needs to be knocked on the head.

madmik

a lot of women are arrogant greedy controlling bitches especially irish so i wouldnt give you 100% of the blame like some others have done but u do need to lighten up a bit

i also think i can judge a person pretty well on first and initial impressions and i think a 15 minutes chat will give you a good insight about a person

I worked in direct sales for years and we usually had less than 15 minutes to work with so guaging a person fast got to be second nature

where have u been meeting these women recently?

tommyboy2222

Correct ! You do hate women !

Don't tar all women with the same brush.

metrovelvet

Try men madmik.

goodcitizen

Forget about Irish women, a lot of them are like little dictators if you're stupid enough to get involved with them with this kind of " I'll do anything to survive" type of mentality which usually means being devious.
Foreign women are more easygoing and you tend to know where you stand with them.

madmik

metrovelvet wrote: »

Try men madmik.

my god,we have a genius in the house!

COH

The fact that you think you can judge all women after 15 mins says alot more about you than it does them. No offense but get over yourself.

You're just not over your past relationship. You'll have a differant perspective once you move on properly