Dear Santa...

Terry

All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth.

Captain Darling

Dont empty your sack anywhere near my house ever again.

AlmightyCushion

New surround sound and pc as it would save me having to buy them.

still want the Buddah Bag I wanted in the last thread!!!

A whole new wardrobe - and I don't mean fitted by a carpenter, I mean filled with lot's of lovely clothes!

dr.bollocko

Girlfriend in a Mrs. Santa costume.
3 nights in a hotel in Paris.
One of them vouchers to do some racing at Mondello Park.
Someone to fix my strat.
A new practice amp with at least 4 different distortion effects that emulate vintage amp distortion.
At least 4 war movies.
One bottle of single malt Irish whiskey.
A box set of Carol Vorderman's best bits from Countdown.
A box of tissues.

4zn76tysfajdxp

Fúck it, none of you people know me: I just wanna get laid. There, I said it.

m5ex9oqjawdg2i

A job...

javaboy

Money. Lots and lots of money. At least a million euro but preferably a lot more.

antomorro-sei

(1) New phone
(2) One of them new iPod nano's...in, red :cool:
(3) Clothes etc

cocoa

a pork pie hat, so I can be sophisticated, and hang on to my hat when advised to do so...

darling.x

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl all year.

This year i would like a full driving license, a new car preferably a ford focus in pink or purple, a hot young mechanic and a surprise.

Captain Darling

Nathalia Loose Pasture wrote: »

Fúck it, none of you people know me: I just wanna get laid. There, I said.

Please let Nathalia Loose Pasture get his hole.

themadchef

Dear Sata:

Wear a condom this year ffs. Once a year ca still get me pregnant ya know!

PurpleBerry

Dear Santa,

Due to economic collapse in my household, this year there will be a charge for your milk and cookies.

Please feel free to smoke with your meal. The smoking charge is €3 per cigarette. Ashtrays and lighter can be rented for a small fee.

If Rudolph or any of his collegues require a treat, these can be purchased on request.

If you or one of your reindeers need use of the bathroom please note that the bathroom is available for paying visitors only. Toilet paper may be purchased in advance.

Thank you for your co-operation.

Neesa

Neesa wrote: »

Dear Santa,

Due to economic collapse in my household, this year there will be a charge for your milk and cookies.

Please feel free to smoke with your meal. The smoking charge is €3 per cigarette. Ashtrays and lighter can be rented for a small fee.

If Rudolph or any of his collegues require a treat, these can be purchased on request.

If you or one of your reindeers need use of the bathroom please note that the bathroom is available for paying visitors only. Toilet paper may be purchased in advance.

Thank you for your co-operation.

LOL - Santa gets the Ryanair treatment!

Ghost Train

I want nothing :pac:

darling.x

Neesa wrote: »

Dear Santa,

Due to economic collapse in my household, this year there will be a charge for your milk and cookies.

Please feel free to smoke with your meal. The smoking charge is €3 per cigarette. Ashtrays and lighter can be rented for a small fee.

If Rudolph or any of his collegues require a treat, these can be purchased on request.

If you or one of your reindeers need use of the bathroom please note that the bathroom is available for paying visitors only.

Poor santa

galwayrush

Dear Santa, please let me have my bank overdraft back, if that's impossible, i'll settle for something easier ,the wining lottery numbers.:rolleyes:

humbert

If the OH comes over it will be the best Christmas since I was an ikkle wan.

randylonghorn

Those blonde twins I saw on the internet the other night would go down very nicely ... they seemed to be well practised at it ...

Kiera

Dear Santa

Please send me a Terry doll this year. The princess innocent knickers doll i got last year broke (after i pulled his head off)

Kind Regards

Kiwi x x

staker

Dear Santa,

This year I want you to clean up the mess you left last year.
That was my Penthouse mag!:mad:
W****R!!

Terry

Kiera wrote: »

Dear Santa

Please send me a Terry doll this year. The princess innocent knickers doll i got last year broke (after i pulled his head off)

Kind Regards

Kiwi x x

The Terry doll comes in real life size and with an exact replica of my 4" penis (erect).

Enjoy.

PurpleBerry

Dear Mr. Claus,

I will not respond to threats or blackmail. Your ransom demands will not be entertained. If you do not return my dog within the next 24 hours I will be forced to contact the police.

And yes, thank you, I did enjoy the selection box.

Blush_01

Australia, please, please, please! Roll on €2,000,000.

Agonist

All I want for Christmas is a reconditioned Atari Jaguar.

Fizman

Dear Santa,

I hear Rudolph has a dodgy ankle, and I'm stuck for work. Any chance?

randylonghorn

Fizman wrote: »

I hear Rudolph has a dodgy ankle, and I'm stuck for work.

Lord, you're innocent!!

SoWatchaWant

Dear Santa,

I want a Martin acoustic. And a new economy.

Cheers,

SoWatchaWant.

SeekUp

Take me with you.

xo,
Me

Fizman

randylonghorn wrote: »

Lord, you're innocent!!

Wrong. Ankle is actually Mandarin for sphincter valve.*



*Ankle may not actually be Mandarin for sphincter valve.

Kdub

Dear Santa
Please i am in need of yo help i have 20 billion euros in my account that i need to send to someone i trust,please send your bank details and admin fee of €100 to this address
Thanks santa
kdub

Kiera

Terry wrote: »

The Terry doll comes in real life size and with an exact replica of my 4" penis (erect).

Enjoy.

Meh!

Hi Santa

Me again. Can i change my Terry doll for a Karoma doll please?

K

TPD

Kiera wrote: »

Meh!

Hi Santa

Me again. Can i change my Terry doll for a Karoma doll please?

K

You know, sleazing on the mods won't make them any less likely to ban you..

brianthebard

javaboy wrote: »

Money. Lots and lots of money. At least a million euro but preferably a lot more.

Can I come over and play with your presents on christmas day???

Dudess

TPD wrote: »

You know, sleazing on the mods won't make them any less likely to ban you..

Pffft... shows how little you know...

Sharpshooter

Nathalia Loose Pasture wrote: »

Fúck it, none of you people know me: I just wanna get laid. There, I said.

Dear Santa ,
Please bring Nathalia Loose Pasture a Designer Batman carpet so he can
at least say he got laid.;)

javaboy

brianthebard wrote: »

Can I come over and play with your presents on christmas day???

Awesome! A new friend. Money can buy happiness.

Fizman

Dear Santa,

Could you please adopt a different approach to my house this year. My roof needed to be re-slated for each of the past three years now and to be quite honest, i'm sick and tired of the labour.

brianthebard

javaboy wrote: »

Awesome! A new friend. Money can buy happiness.

Of course it can, if you share.

javaboy

brianthebard wrote: »

Of course it can, if you share.

Of course I'll share. If Santa gives me the money I'll be more than happy to share it with all my friends!

That was just for the fat man's benefit so I stay on the nice list. That money is mine.

Sharpshooter

Fizman wrote: »

Dear Santa,

Could you please adopt a different approach to my house this year. My roof needed to be re-slated for each of the past three years now and to be quite honest, i'm sick and tired of the labour.

Aw , are you sick of the rain dear....

javaboy

sharpshooterH wrote: »

Aw , are you sick of the rain dear....

Naughty List:

• sharpshooterH

Nice List:

• Everybody else

Sharpshooter

javaboy wrote: »

Naughty List:

• sharpshooterH

Nice List:

1. Everybody else

I'll stay on the naughty list , no fat old man in a red costume is cuming anywhere near me tbh...

_blank_

Santa?

It's Santy

Zzippy

Dear Santa

Sorry its back to just milk and cookies this year, there's a recession on here and we just can't afford the coke and hookers anymore.

Happy Christmas!

TPD

Dudess wrote: »

Pffft... shows how little you know...

Maybe I should try me some o' this sleazin'....

randylonghorn

Kiera wrote: »

Meh!

Hi Santa

Me again. Can i change my Terry doll for a Karoma doll please?

K

S'funny, I never thought you would opt for the smaller-dicked ones ...

Terry

Des wrote: »

Santa?

It's Santy

It's only Santa if you're, ya know, posh loike.

Shut up. I was going with the original thread title.

AlmightyCushion

I' willing to bet 6th has already put the AH modship on his christmas wish list. :pac:

javaboy

Under the new measures, you're all spending a few nights in the cells and being fined €700 for begging.