Harney the Blimp

dublinario

I was staring slack-jawed at the telly the other day, when politico Stegosaurus Mary Harney sloped onto the screen. I was bored, and briefly flirted with the idea of using her as inspiration for a ****. She's just too ugly though, and it got me thinking: how absurd is it for our Minister for Health to be, not only unwankable, but clinically obese?

What kind of message does that foster, particularly in the age of pandemic obesity? The woman is clearly not a healthy weight; therefore she is clearly not healthy. How then can she be an appropriate figurehead for our health system?

helimachoptor

dublinario wrote: »

I was staring slack-jawed at the telly the other day, when politico Stegosaurus Mary Harney sloped onto the screen. I was bored, and briefly flirted with the idea of using her as inspiration for a ****. She's just too ugly though, and it got me thinking: how absurd is it for our Minister for Health to be, not only unwankable, but clinically obese?

What kind of message does that foster, particularly in the age of pandemic obesity? The woman is clearly not a healthy weight; therefore she is clearly not healthy. How then can she be an appropriate figurehead for our health system?

Dude to even think of that you need to be shot, seriously I'd rather get up on a dead donkey in the Afghan mountains while being hunted by Talieban crackpots and having a my a$$ used as the designation point for a US laser guided fuel air bomb

KnifeWRENCH

The second part of the OP's post reminds me of 2nd Year CSPE - our teacher asked why it was a risky move for Bertie Ahern to make her Minister for Health.
The answer he was hoping for was "She was the Tanaiste and leader of the PD's so she had a lot to lose if she didn't do well as Health Minister."

Girl in my class puts up her hand: "Is it because she's so fat?" and everyone just burst out laughing.

I cannot relate to the first part - Harney as **** material??!! :eek::eek:

thelordofcheese

dublinario wrote: »

I was staring slack-jawed at the telly the other day, when politico Stegosaurus Mary Harney sloped onto the screen. I was bored, and briefly flirted with the idea of using her as inspiration for a ****. She's just too ugly though, and it got me thinking: how absurd is it for our Minister for Health to be, not only unwankable, but clinically obese?

What kind of message does that foster, particularly in the age of pandemic obesity? The woman is clearly not a healthy weight; therefore she is clearly not healthy. How then can she be an appropriate figurehead for our health system?

Wow, i never noticed that before.
You're so clever, this certainly hasn't been brought up ad nauseam at all!

Huzzah for you!

Kold

She's a beacon of hope for ignorant aul' bitches nationwide.

dublinario

helimachoptor wrote: »

Dude to even think of that you need to be shot, seriously I'd rather get up on a dead donkey in the Afghan mountains while being hunted by Talieban crackpots and having a my a$$ used as the designation point for a US laser guided fuel air bomb

You're right, I don't know what I was thinking. I'd give that Mary Hanafin one though. I'd lay money that she's into all kinds of freaky S & M, and you'd need to establish a "safety word" in advance.

dublinario

thelordofcheese wrote: »

Wow, i never noticed that before.
You're so clever, this certainly hasn't been brought up ad nauseam at all!

Huzzah for you!

Oh no thelordofcheese, for you are the clever one, having harnessed the awesome power of 'sarcasm'. You must be a God amongst Generation X. I imagine mortals quiver beneath the weight of your mighty irony. "He's saying one thing, but he means another...how...how...how does he do that?" Such intellectual chicanery, surely you are cut from the cloth of Gods?

KnifeWRENCH

dublinario wrote: »

You're right, I don't know what I was thinking. I'd give that Mary Hanafin one though. I'd lay money that she's into all kinds of freaky S & M, and you'd need to establish a "safety word" in advance.

tut-tut.
You'll never be one of Dudess' Men of Honour with that attitude!

Dubh Geannain

Harney for finance minister!!

Well we could use some buoyancy in the financial system

thelordofcheese

dublinario wrote: »

Oh no thelordofcheese, for you are the clever one, having harnessed the awesome power of 'sarcasm'. You must be a God amongst Generation X. I imagine mortals quiver beneath the weight of your mighty irony. "He's saying one thing, but he means another...how...how...how does he do that?" Such intellectual chicanery, surely you are cut from the cloth of Gods?

Try harder, be better.

Nehaxak

I dunno, she's not a regular plain faced inbred, seems to have a bit of prettiness to her face at least.
Not that I'd go out of my way now to look for a shag from her but I wouldn't say no either.

I do though think it strange that we have a big fat clinically obese woman (who does not seem to be doing anything about it at all) at the heart of our health system.

If she was going out of her way to get rid of the fat, big of jogging even, she'd get some respect for it.

BTW, Pat Carey and Mary Hannafin are shagging each other - just thought I'd mention that one there now seeing as how you're looking for **** inspiration.

dublinario

Dubh Geannain wrote: »

Harney for finance minister!!

Well we could use some buoyancy in the financial system

Twink for Minister for Health (mmmm, Twink). There's nowt wrong with a little coffin-dodging punani.

dublinario

thelordofcheese wrote: »

Try harder, be better.

Thanks Confucius. Inspired words (cough). I can see why you're thought of so highly over in Thought Police headquarters. Still, thanks for stopping by...

This thread me lol

Danke op.

I'd need a bucket of LSD and a crate of Erdinger to mount that fucking bitch!

ScumLord

Nehaxak wrote: »

I dunno, she's not a regular plain faced inbred, seems to have a bit of prettiness to her face at least.
Not that I'd go out of my way now to look for a shag from her but I wouldn't say no either.

Her face looks like porridge with a few lumps of sheep poo in it.

When times get really hard though the nation can feast on her carcass.

dublinario

Nehaxak wrote: »

I dunno, she's not a regular plain faced inbred, seems to have a bit of prettiness to her face at least.
Not that I'd go out of my way now to look for a shag from her but I wouldn't say no either.

I'd definitely give Harney one, but I'd want the room to be more than dark. Ideally, I'd travel to Switzerland and mount her adjacent to one of the mini-black holes arising from those recent experiments. With luck, the black-hole would suck in every morsel of light, and the whole experience would therefore be more sensory than visual.

dublinario

ScumLord wrote: »

When times get really hard though the nation can feast on her carcass.

That's short-term thinking ScumLord. At best, Harney's carcass would tide the Leinster counties over for 6 months -- 12 months tops. Then what? No, I say treat her like a queen bee. We pump her full of fertility hormones and then hockey her round the clock, in shifts of 6 men at a time, and have her breed us an army of meat to see us through the recession. Granted, Harney-meat will likely taste chewy, and inferior to chicken. But can beggars be choosers ScumLord? Can they? Can they really?

4zn76tysfajdxp

Has anyone ever heard Harney talk about obesity?

Dinter

Whenever she brags about another failed negotiation with the HSE I imagine her lying out naked, her bags of fat rolling sweatily, covered in weeping bedsores, on a thick metal bed in a cave while Professor Drumm who's chained to her fist, pleads weakly not to be thrown to the Rancor.

dublinario

dublinario wrote: »

That's short-term thinking ScumLord. At best, Harney's carcass would tide the Leinster counties over for 6 months -- 12 months tops. Then what? No, I say treat her like a queen bee. We pump her full of fertility hormones and then hockey her round the clock, in shifts of 6 men at a time, and have her breed us an army of meat to see us through the recession. Granted, Harney-meat will likely taste chewy, and inferior to chicken. But can beggars be choosers ScumLord? Can they? Can they really?

This guy deserves a ****ing award. That has me in tears!

Dinter

Canaan Eager Scanner wrote: »

Has anyone ever heard Harney talk about obesity?

I'm sure she has but it's hard to understand her speaking with her mouth full.

dublinario

Dinter wrote: »

Whenever she brags about another failed negotiation with the HSE I imagine her lying out naked, her bags of fat rolling sweatily, covered in weeping bedsores, on a thick metal bed in a cave while Professor Drumm who's chained to her fist, pleads weakly not to be thrown to the Rancor.

Stop man, I'm pitching a tent here. I can't stand up now.

My own particular fantasy is specific, and takes place on the Serengeti: A sedated Harney is dropped off at a watering hole. Once awoken, she approaches a young, male hippo (downwind, obviously) and parades her baby-oiled ass in front of him. Naturally, the hippo will mount her (who wouldn't?). And BAM!!! That's when I, having been disguised as a hyena, slide in underneath and take her from the front. Budda-bing, Budda-bang. Your bog-standard, Harney-Hippo Menage de Trois Bestiality special.

patmac

This might help Dublinario in the hand shandy department:
mary3.jpg

Gyalist

I'd like to refer the Honourable Gentleman to this thread.

Het-Field

Who cares what weight she is.

She was the minister who deregulated the taxi market, achieved 100 % employment, removed smog from Dublin, set up the EPA, is attempting to free up beds in public hospital, is playing a huge role in the fight against cervical cancer, and has not been intimidated by the consultants.

Who cares if she is heavy, she is damn effective, in spite of what the media say.

FestivalFox

Every time I see Mary Harney on TV I think of Pearl from the 1st Blade film, You know the big huge vampire they burn with the UV torch.

Dinter

Het-Field wrote: »

Who cares what weight she is.

She was the minister who deregulated the taxi market, achieved 100 % employment, removed smog from Dublin, set up the EPA, is attempting to free up beds in public hospital, is playing a huge role in the fight against cervical cancer, and has not been intimidated by the consultants.

Who cares if she is heavy, she is damn effective, in spite of what the media say.

And if that wasn't enough she taught children to save their pocket money when she was modelling for Ulster bank.

thelordofcheese

FestivalFox wrote: »

Every time I see Mary Harney on TV I think of Pearl from the 1st Blade film, You know the big huge vampire they burn with the UV torch.[IMG]file:///C:/Users/Johnny/AppData/Local/Temp/moz-screenshot.jpg[/IMG]

you can't link us stuff that's on your hard-drive, Johnny.

Dinter

Dinter wrote: »

And if that wasn't enough she taught children to save their pocket money when she was modelling for Ulster bank.

I see what you did there lol :pac:

FestivalFox

Dinter wrote: »

And if that wasn't enough she taught children to save their pocket money when she was modelling for Ulster bank.

oops, didn't realise I did that! Decided not to attach the PIC, massive vampire boobs in it.

MOH

dublinario wrote: »

What kind of message does that foster, particularly in the age of pandemic obesity? The woman is clearly not a healthy weight; therefore she is clearly not healthy. How then can she be an appropriate figurehead for our health system?

I think she's very appropriate given the state of the HSE

Deleted User wrote: »

This thread me lol

Danke op.

I'd need a bucket of LSD and a crate of Erdinger to mount that fucking bitch!

You'd need more than that. Ropes, pitons, a team of sherpas, and maybe some oxygen.

ScumLord

dublinario wrote: »

That's short-term thinking ScumLord. At best, Harney's carcass would tide the Leinster counties over for 6 months -- 12 months tops. Then what? No, I say treat her like a queen bee. We pump her full of fertility hormones and then hockey her round the clock, in shifts of 6 men at a time, and have her breed us an army of meat to see us through the recession. Granted, Harney-meat will likely taste chewy, and inferior to chicken. But can beggars be choosers ScumLord? Can they? Can they really?

Beggars can be choosers, however I believe their called thieves at that point I'm not sure.

The problem is any children the Harney has, needs to be able to run out of the womb, she'll eat anything, it would only delight her to have food coming out of her hole.

Dudess

Nehaxak wrote: »

Not that I'd go out of my way now to look for a shag from her but I wouldn't say no either.

:eek:
You're finished now!

Nah, nothing particularly hideous about her face. It's just her excess weight that makes her unattractive.

As for being Minister for Health: meh, is the Minister for Sport sporty? Being a relevant role model isn't part of the job description afaik.

CtrlSource

dublinario wrote: »

I was staring slack-jawed at the telly the other day, when politico Stegosaurus Mary Harney sloped onto the screen. I was bored, and briefly flirted with the idea of using her as inspiration for a ****. She's just too ugly though, and it got me thinking: how absurd is it for our Minister for Health to be, not only unwankable, but clinically obese?

What kind of message does that foster, particularly in the age of pandemic obesity? The woman is clearly not a healthy weight; therefore she is clearly not healthy. How then can she be an appropriate figurehead for our health system?

Way to brighten up a dull afternoon! i salute you

ScumLord wrote: »

Her face looks like porridge with a few lumps of sheep poo in it.

When times get really hard though the nation can feast on her carcass.

LMAO

Nehaxak

Dudess wrote: »

:eek:
You're finished now!

I could go on but I'm in work and I don't want to get all horny thinking up Mary Harney erotica.

I bet she's a real durty bird though.

arybvtcw0eolkf

Kold wrote: »

She's a beacon bacon of hope for ignorant aul' bitches nationwide.

Fixed.

Prof.Badass

yo health minister so fat she....

The_Minister

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGHH!!!

How many of you said the same thing when a heavy-drinking, smoking fat man was Minister of health?

No-one.

Blazer

She's a fat fcukin bitch with not a clue.
Everytime I see the cvnt on TV I have to stop myself from throwing someone at it.
Then again I get that urge everytime I hear some politcian gimp on tv...especially that twat Wormley.

And as **** material?...god that's unthinkable..shame on you people.

hopalong85

thelordofcheese wrote: »

Try harder, be better.

fail.

DublinWriter

A morbidly obese woman as Minister for Health? Honestly it would be like having a Minister for Finance who didn't have his own bank account!.....opps.

Only in Ireland.

P.S. it could be worse, imagine if her husband was Chairman of FAS....opps!

104494431

square_igloo wrote: »

I cannot relate to the first part - Harney as **** material??!! :eek::eek:

Butch lesbians need apply, maybe?

Fulton Crown

104494431 wrote: »

Butch lesbians need apply, maybe?

All perfect here huh ? Lady has guts to take on the Health portfolio..imposssible job..won't deny she fills a pair if stockins fairly well...but is that a crime ?

What if she has an arse you play handball against..does that make her a bad Minister for Health ??

Wha ?

Kintarō Hattori

OK our health system is a joke but lets put that aside for a moment. It's not relevant that because she is the minster for health she should be a picture of health. It's about ability to do the job.

To think that because she is overweight makes her unable to do an effective job shows lack of common sense.

xOxSinéadxOx

she's a fatty

Kintarō Hattori

xOxSinéadxOx wrote: »

she's a fatty

Interesting insight there Sinéad... :rolleyes:

Fulton Crown

xOxSinéadxOx wrote: »

she's a fatty

Took you a while to think that one up OXY....?

xOxSinéadxOx

yes, fatty

galwayrush

The image is so wrong, i may never be able to **** again.

Lockstep

Is she fat? yes.

However, I would also view her as an incompetent minister for health and this would be my opposition to her.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

I've said it before, and I'll say it again:

YOu die the woman's hair red, slap some green facepaint on her and viola - Princess Fiona.