Girlfriend always wants hug,cuddles etc..is this normal or clingy ?

LegacyUser

Hi
this may sound a bit strange but it's something that I've been thinking about over the last weeks or so i.e is my gf becoming needy or clingy ?? my gf always wants hugs and kisses and cuddles etc,like after sex she always wants me to hold her and cuddle her in my arms and when I get up to go the next morning she nearly always asks me to leave a tshirt or something with my scent on it.
I've asked her why and she says she wants to be able to have something of mine with her later that night if we won't see eachother.
She hugs the pillow I'd sleep on too as it has my aftershave/deodourant smell on it .
Now don't get me wrong I think it's lovely that she does all this but I'm wondering if I let it go on and don't say anything about it will she become clingy or does she sound clingy as it is ?
This is my first girlfriend so I've nothing to compare her behaviour to,anyway so I'm just wondering is this ok for her to do or is it weird ?
Thanks for any replies

taram

Wanting hugs and cuddles is perfectly normal, and a lovely way to show affection to each other. She seems very interested in you, and seems to miss you when you're not with her, both normal things to do.

Clingy in my opinion (what I've seen with friends) is ringing/texting non-stop, begging you to stay over, following you around like a puppy etc. So relax, enjoy your relationship

Latchy

It's when the hugs cuddles stop .....that's the time to worry

MysticalSoul

Girls need affection after sex, as it is quite vulnerable for females to sleep with someone. Cuddling after sex, can IMHO sometimes help build a stronger relationship too. I think it is a good thing that she can be so honest with you about what she wants/needs.

AnonoBoy

Perfectly normal. Go with it dude.

Hold her after sex. Let her keep a shirt of yours.

She digs you.

Enjoy it.

barbiegirl

She's defo ok. I'm the very same, have been since the begining with the OH and I'm not at all clingy, well unless it's that time of month, then I just want to sit and cuddle all night, only lasts 24 hours though.
Clingy would be not letting you see your friends. Insisting on sitting beside you all teh time in the pub when you're out. Not letting you out on your own. etc.
Sounds to me like she's just in love.

KTRIC

OP, you're well in there. What ever you're doing keep it up.

Burial

I'd find the t-shirt and pillow hugging weird.... However, I'd still give her the t-shirt and I'd slag her over the pillow thing... Thats just me though...

SarahJ

This isn't weird at all, its lovely!!

i love to have my boyfriends tshirts that smell like him when he's not around, its a comfort thing

MikeHoncho

Eh. am I the only dude that actually enjoys that too. Not the T - Shirt and pillow thing but I find cuddling etc with my girlfriend after sex to be just as rewarding as the actual act. Does that make me ghey?

TheDriver

Your not the only dude who likes that, big into it myself. Shes big into ya, keep her!

superjosh9

OP I want what you've got! You're incredibly lucky.

jim o doom

Nothing wrong with that dude - me an my fiancee are going out 7 years and we still hug and cuddle all the time. In fact we've both been late for work several times a month because getting out of bed in to a cold room instead of hugging the other person in bed is so much crappier an option

Plus she (despite having plenty of her own, many purchased by me) prefers to wear my hoodies around the house because they are bigger, warmer & smell like me. Personally I love hugs & things so it doesn't bother me in the slighest, and I'm amazed you brought it up - seems to me that if you said it to her or tried to "put an end to it" it would create a rift in your relationship - and you don't want that now do ya? :P

ven0m

my missus is the same, & yes it annoys me, as I'm not really a huggy person (and no, it's not an issue that needs sorting out!), but meh, it's not gonna cause any harm or whatnot so I usually just give her the hugs, saves the long faces or upset & it's not doing any harm to anyone.

LegacyUser

Hi, thanks so much for all your replies they're great .
I love the way she does all that stuff makes me feel wanted and appreciated but I was just thinking that maybe it's over the top and if I show that I like it it might make her like that but it's cool to see that it's all good ,thanks again.

One question though why does she always want to be cuddled/held after sex ? I know a poster said women feel vulnerable etc but is this not the same for guys then ?

Brady

Your on a winner there!

Money Shot

MikeHoncho wrote: »

Eh. am I the only dude that actually enjoys that too. Not the T - Shirt and pillow thing but I find cuddling etc with my girlfriend after sex to be just as rewarding as the actual act. Does that make me ghey?

I wouldn't say it makes you ghey, but I think most blokes just want to turn over and get some sleep post deed. It's all about the main course for me, she likes desert, I can take it or leave it.
Personally, I can't actually get a sleep with anyone near me. I'm not cold, and you can have a hug, but then I need my space ...
Maybe I'm weird
In relation to the OP, I think it's cool - most men would love to get anywhere near that kind of attention from their other half.

SarahJ

Money Shot wrote: »

I wouldn't say it makes you ghey, but I think most blokes just want to turn over and get some sleep post deed. It's all about the main course for me, she likes desert, I can take it or leave it.
Personally, I can't actually get a sleep with anyone near me. I'm not cold, and you can have a hug, but then I need my space ...
Maybe I'm weird
In relation to the OP, I think it's cool - most men would love to get anywhere near that kind of attention from their other half.

agree with ya on the 'needing yor space' thing. Might have a cuddle for a bit, but I really, really like to sleep on my own tbh, That sounds bad, but I'm just like that

Silverfish

Unregged guy wrote: »

Hi, thanks so much for all your replies they're great .
I love the way she does all that stuff makes me feel wanted and appreciated but I was just thinking that maybe it's over the top and if I show that I like it it might make her like that but it's cool to see that it's all good ,thanks again.

One question though why does she always want to be cuddled/held after sex ? I know a poster said women feel vulnerable etc but is this not the same for guys then ?

Its not so much 'vulnerable' but they would like to feel you wanted sex with them more than just wanted sex.

If you just roll over and go to sleep, it can send the message of 'I'm done with you now'.

Marksie

Unregged guy wrote: »

One question though why does she always want to be cuddled/held after sex ? I know a poster said women feel vulnerable etc but is this not the same for guys then ?

It part and parcel of lifting it above a biological urge.
In general guys have been conditioned, in my opinion, not to show vulnerability.
A man who can drop his defensive both during and post coitally will find that there is a really deep intimacy that develops

Silverfish wrote: »

Its not so much 'vulnerable' but they would like to feel you wanted sex with them more than just wanted sex.

If you just roll over and go to sleep, it can send the message of 'I'm done with you now'.

+1 agreed

String

My GF is the same and I love it. Its because we love eachother and nothing feels better tbh! How long have ye been with eachother? Could be a sign

LegacyUser

DrMorphine wrote: »

My GF is the same and I love it. Its because we love eachother and nothing feels better tbh! How long have ye been with eachother? Could be a sign

Not long just over 2 months now yea I love it too just you hear about these girls who become real needy etc and I was thinking is this how it starts with always wanting a piece of me around her but glad to see it's normal .

LegacyUser

Ahh sure ye're just starting out, of course she's still at that 'can't keep her hands off you' stage. She sounds like a lovely tactile and affectionate girl, you should be enjoying every minute of it. Have you asked yourself why you're not caught up in it too? You should be as enthusiastic at this early stage as she is! I'd say relax, stop worrying about the 'what ifs' and just enjoy being with your lovely girl...

Sephiroth_dude

god sake man be thankful your girlfriend is that affectionate ;-).

String

Unregged guy wrote: »

Not long just over 2 months now yea I love it too just you hear about these girls who become real needy etc and I was thinking is this how it starts with always wanting a piece of me around her but glad to see it's normal .

If its only 2 months then you should be happy She obviously very fond of you. I now what you mean about needed but I think thats more to do with not letting you go out with your friends cause wnats to see you etc. Btw in time you will want something with her perfume on it :P just wait and see

MizzLolly

Geez that's not weird at all OP!! It's always nice to have a tshirt or something close by when you're apart!! She sounds lovely!

Jack B. Badd

MikeHoncho wrote: »

Eh. am I the only dude that actually enjoys that too. Not the T - Shirt and pillow thing but I find cuddling etc with my girlfriend after sex to be just as rewarding as the actual act. Does that make me ghey?

Yep, cuddling with your girlfriend makes you very f*cking ghey! :P
Tbh, I'd say the t-shirt and pillow thing is just for comfort. I remember when I started going out with my boyfriend I used to love the smell of him from bedclothes, etc. Now that we've moved in together I'm so used to him that I can no longer consciously discern "his" smell. Can't remember any other guy that's happened with Of course, all this romantic drivel could be down to him changing his aftershave at some point over the past few years...

xfirefishx

I love having my boyfriend's t-shirts and stuff and yeah, sometimes if he has to go home early, I enjoy snuggling into his pillow - all warm and smelling of him! *hehe* There's nothing wrong with it.

You're lucky actually. She's just being open and honest about how much she likes you. I think it's much nicer that she's doing it, rather than acting cold and distant so you think she's 'normal'. I'm sure that would be much less pleasant.

And why not hold her after sex, she probably just wants to feel close to you after doing something so intimate. Perhaps you find that strange as for you it's a new relationship and therefore you haven't developed that feeling of sex as a connection or love (how cheesy). My bf likes cuddling after sex too (I think!) but re the own space thing... when I want to sleep, I want my own space!! Everyone is a little bit different!

McGinty

Hi Op

If you like it, then enjoy her open affection, it does mean she digs you big time.

von Neumann

Get out now, while you still can!!
Seriously it would weird me out a bit too.
But where all strange in our own way, You'll just have to try and get used to it.

Poloman

As a first girlfriend thats great! I have had a few girlfs and now its annoyingly funny when I go to put on one of my fav t-shirts she is on the couch wearing it!!! She robs all my socks/toothpaste/towels/stashed goodies/jumpers/sweatshirts. If i am not around (away) she puts some of my aftershave on her sleeve to sniff it until I get back from abroad or whatever.

Its cute dude. Say nothing and enjoy that someone is mad about ya!

Overheal

Unregged guy wrote: »

Hi
this may sound a bit strange but it's something that I've been thinking about over the last weeks or so i.e is my gf becoming needy or clingy ?? my gf always wants hugs and kisses and cuddles etc,like after sex she always wants me to hold her and cuddle her in my arms and when I get up to go the next morning she nearly always asks me to leave a tshirt or something with my scent on it.
I've asked her why and she says she wants to be able to have something of mine with her later that night if we won't see eachother.
She hugs the pillow I'd sleep on too as it has my aftershave/deodourant smell on it .
Now don't get me wrong I think it's lovely that she does all this but I'm wondering if I let it go on and don't say anything about it will she become clingy or does she sound clingy as it is ?
This is my first girlfriend so I've nothing to compare her behaviour to,anyway so I'm just wondering is this ok for her to do or is it weird ?
Thanks for any replies

How I envy your situation. Go with it ffs! :pac:

damienricefan

god i envy this topic

i'd settle for a thigh grope lol :P

entropi

It sounds like the girl is so into you, i'd be a very lucky man if i was in your position:) About the whole "why does she like to hug/cuddle after sex?" question, its mostly due to hormone differences in men/women not gonna bore you with reasons just be really happy it is there, along with the whole smelling your clothing. She is probably in love with you, i wish nothing but good luck there:)

primastar

latchyco wrote: »

It's when the hugs cuddles stop .....that's the time to worry

oh boy god u can sing it!!