Are parents letting their daughter wear to little to young??

hattie-f

Recently i have stepped back and taken a look at the world, one of the things i have noticed is that the 'fashionable' teenage clothes seem to be getting smaller.

Now i dont want to be a kill joy to any teenagers out there but the lack of clothes worn by teenagers can be a show.

Ive seen girls of 11 years of age go out to the local non alcoholic discos wearing no more than what looks like a belt, a bra and a pair of 6 inch heels.

I no that there are some bad people out there no matter where you go but i do believe that some girls put themselves on plates for some beasts without realising it. Although 1 sound like an old one babbling on im actually still a teenager myself and enjoy going out, but the differance with me is that i didnt give in to peer pressure to go and dress like that and had no choice through my mam even if i wanted to.

for instance i rember on year when i was 13 and my friends were 12 we went out to our first disco.
i wore a black tee shirt and jeans with boots, but my friends wore micro mini skirts and boob tubes which showed their stomachs. One then told me that her mam picked it for her!!:eek:

Needless to say my friends got allot more male attention than me which shows the peer pressure end of it.

"non alcoholic discos"

The_Conductor

To be honest- a lot of parents these days simply don't know any better. Yes- teenagers or even younger kids are going out to discos/cinema/shopping (and elsewhere) wearing totally inappropriate clothing- micro minis that leave nothing to the imagination, tops with provocative slogans, tops that are so low cut as to in some cases expose breasts to the extent that you're left wondering how they don't simply fall out. I'm not a prude, but often the thought "if a prostitute was dressed like that you'd know she was really desperate", does come to mind. Yes, it is totally inappropriate- and pitiful that some kids seem to think its trendy to show off their bodies. It does desensitise both genders to sex at an unrealistic age. I'm not so sure whether paedophiles (or other beasts as you put them) are particularly an issue or attracted to this sort of thing- perhaps I'm unrealistic? I feel sorry for the kids (who for the most part don't know any better) and a bit angry towards the parents who in some cases do appear to be actively encouraging this "fashion", if this is what it is.......

Some areas have different trends- if you go to Clarehall you can see hoardes of teenagers in pyjamas (at least they got over the shiny tracksuit phase I guess)- they think they are being trendy? Maybe they are to themselves and their friends? Perhaps its a demographic thing- a lot of people our age group were goths and massively into body piercings etc- some still are. Some people like to dress up as stuffed animals and attend parties in costume- so be it. Others are happy with clubs such as Nimhneach. But the vast majority of all these people are all in their 20s and 30s (some older). Kiddies showing off their bodies is not cool, regardless of what they think- if anything its shameful that things have gotten to that level.

Well done for not simply falling into step with peer pressure- there can be a bit of a herd mentality particularly with impressionable teenagers and kids who feel the need to subscribe to whatever everyone else is doing. It shows that you are more mature than those who do wear their boob tubes (or whatever). Don't worry about the lack of male attention- it'll come in due course- and perhaps if you're not dressing in such a provocative way, you might actually end up with a guy who admires you for who you are- and not because you enjoy showing off your tits (or even worse feel the need to show off your tits because everyone else is)?

Sorry for being blunt mods.

Phlann

Totally, the amount of kids you see around Dublin looking like cheap hookers is ridiculous. This weird sexualisation of children is possibly the most disturbing trend of the last ten years.


Actually, I've been meaning to vent this for a while but I haven't really had the opportunity: There's a group of girls that live near me (they're all about 13) who hang out outside my house and every time I step outside for a smoke they sit up on the wall, backs to me, pull their g-strings (g-strings on 13 year olds ffs) about half way up their backs and start giving me looks over their shoulders!

I don't know where the feck to look when it happens!! I'm just scared somebody will come along and think I'm perving on them so I usually just go straight back inside.

I mean, I feel pretty sorry for them, but I wish they'd bugger off...

**Caroline**

I totally agree! I think there's nothing wrong with young girls being fashionable and wearing really nice and trendy skirts etc. once it's tasteful - there's being ladylike and then there's being tarty and the parents should have enough cop on to judge which is which!! Unfortunately some of them don't...:(

fits

Those girls who go to the bective (?) discos in Donnybrook just make me want to cry. I just dont understand why they dress like that.

Nevyn

Have you any idea how hard it is to get modest clothes for an active girl ?
pre teen now starts at age 8 and it is a nightmare to try and get suitible clothing the shops are stocking all manner of horredus stuff.

gcgirl

Deleted User wrote: »

"non alcoholic discos"

pics or it did not happen:D

gcgirl

I may order 2 of these for my 2 girls !! I'm dreading them going past 10 years of age!!

Twee.

Thaedydal wrote: »

Have you any idea how hard it is to get modest clothes for an active girl ?
pre teen now starts at age 8 and it is a nightmare to try and get suitible clothing the shops are stocking all manner of horredus stuff.

Oh I hated shopping between the ages of 9 and 11! Clothes were either too childish or too grown up, no happy medium.
I used to work at all-ages gigs and the outfits some of the girls would be wearing! It's not just those going to discos that, em, slut it up! Lots of tiny tartan skirts, fishnet tights and cut up Metallica or whatever t-shirts.

LadyMayBelle

It's shocking what clothes are on sale for children these days, mini skirts and teeshirts with slogans far too inappropriate.
my little sis adores dresses, the more frills the better! But recently i have noticed her wanting to wear baggy jumpers and jeans like some of the older girls in the estate, which drown them out and while i wouldnt want her wearing skintight clothes, I would like her to grow up embracing her feminimity, not in a preteen tarty way, but in a respectable fashion(and no i don't expect her to love frills forever!)

LolaLuv

My cousin bought her 4-year-old daughter a pair of high heels, and lets her wear them out in public. I can not for the life of me understand that.

jellie

I worked in Adams, the kids clothes shop, for a couple of years during college. Some of the clothes for the kids kinda shocked me. the thing in adams is they do the same style from age 4-12/13. so some of the clothes that would be slightly in with the trends for the older girls would also be made for 4 yr olds. id be horrified at some parents buying miniskirts for their 4 yr old. they did stock more child-like clothing too, but you cant really blame them for making it when its selling. there were also shoes with heels, though i cant remember how small they went, maybe a childs size 12. still too young to be wearing heels.

i feel like an old woman writing that.

Reku

As long as it's considered ok for women to dress like this you'll have girls also wanting to do so, just as with alcohol, make-up, dating, sex, etc... Being a teenager is often about trying to prove to the world how "grown up" you are, though most unfortunately miss the point that it's not about doing a certain something but rather about how you go about doing it and why you do it.

While part of me does think that they shouldn't be wearing overly skimpy clothing I also wonder if this is perhaps just my own fault in that I've allowed my mind to somehow connect these with sexual awareness/availability? Do the teenagers make this same connection or do they just think it's funny the looks they get when they wear them, much as a child who overhears a bad word will supposedly repeat it just to see the horror on peoples' faces, if you don't pay any notice the child gets bored and gives up using it (no idea how true this is TBH, just something I read). In naturalist communities it's not like they make the kids wear clothing until they become adults, they don't have this association between the vision of certain regions of skin and sex, then what about when the girls go swimming, to do ballet/gymnastics, rather figure revealing outfits there too yet it is ok due to context? I don't really know as this is a complicated issue, I'm just putting the thought out there.


The one that bothers me is parents getting their baby's ear(s) pierced, definitely don't think that's appropriate for simple safety reasons since babies will pull at anything and everything, and at that age if the earring/stud does come out the child will undoubtedly try to eat it which could be VERY dangerous.

Curvy Vixen

Sure they sell g-strings for 8 and 9 year olds ffs! There was a woman on Gerry Ryan or the like about 6 months ago defending the fact that her 6/7 year old daughter wears them...because she see's her mum wearing them and wants to be like her :eek:

I remember a couple of years ago seeing a t-shirt on a stall in Windsor Market that was lovely and pink and sparkly ~ size was aged 5. When I went over to look properly I realised that the slogan said 'Some Girls Do...Some Girls Don't...But I Might!' FOR A 5 YEAR OLD :eek::mad:

Macha

farohar wrote: »

As long as it's considered ok for women to dress like this you'll have girls also wanting to do so, just as with alcohol, make-up, dating, sex, etc...

That's true. I remember being 8 years old & going through my mum's make up & trying on her high heels. But there was no way I would go out of the house with any of that on. Plus you can't climb trees in high heels!

My friends & I didn't really start on the real dressing up until around 15.

farohar wrote: »

While part of me does think that they shouldn't be wearing overly skimpy clothing I also wonder if this is perhaps just my own fault in that I've allowed my mind to somehow connect these with sexual awareness/availability? Do the teenagers make this same connection or do they just think it's funny the looks they get when they wear them, much as a child who overhears a bad word will supposedly repeat it just to see the horror on peoples' faces, if you don't pay any notice the child gets bored and gives up using it (no idea how true this is TBH, just something I read)...

I think its about intent and function. Young kids wear swimmers because they're in the pool or at the beach. It is totally innocent & they're normally very unselfconscious.

I think the problem lies with young girls thinking that they HAVE to appear sexually attractive. It's linked to the whole sexual objectification of women in our media, which is at insane levels. I remember hearing that a Christina Agueilera ad for shoes being criticised because she was sitting there in a school uniform, short skirt & sucking a lollipop. I mean you hear statistics that a majority of 11 year olds are unhappy with their bodies and are on diets. WTF is up with that?? The problem is that our society isn't happy with sexually objectifying grown women, we have to do it to girls as well and thus blur the line for everyone involved. This leads to them examining their bodies critically & measuring them against the images they see. They also link success with being sexually attractive and react accordingly.

I don't blame teenagers for wanting to dress provocatively. They are simply responding to the messages that are given to them through the media.

whiskeyman

It's so fecked up.
I get the bus home sometimes, and pass by either Wesley on a Friday or Barcode some other evenings... and seeing all the young ones wearing next to nothing it mad.

On the flip side, I wonder what its doing to the mind of young lads?
Do they 'expect' this now?
When I was young, girls wouldn't dress so scantly, and as you grew older (and became more sexually aware / aroused), you then came into contact with girls / women who dressed sexy, and it was all part of the attraction game.
Those years were great, as you got to see women in a 'sexy' light... but 14/15 year old lads are getting that now?
I know it did go on when I was younger to some extent, but it's just mad now.

Macha

whiskeyman wrote: »

On the flip side, I wonder what its doing to the mind of young lads?
Do they 'expect' this now?
When I was young, girls wouldn't dress so scantly, and as you grew older (and became more sexually aware / aroused), you then came into contact with girls / women who dressed sexy, and it was all part of the attraction game.
Those years were great, as you got to see women in a 'sexy' light... but 14/15 year old lads are getting that now?
I know it did go on when I was younger to some extent, but it's just mad now.

So true, it just perpetuates it for both sides. Girls feel its expected of them & guys expect it. It's also a horrible way to view sexiness. I heard them talking on the radio the other day about the muslim scarf & guys were coming on saying that they thought the women covered up were sexier than women showing everything.

Plus I know rape is never the woman's fault but these girls are not doing themselves any favours...

Dragan

Phlann wrote: »

I don't know where the feck to look when it happens!! I'm just scared somebody will come along and think I'm perving on them so I usually just go straight back inside.

My normal response is just to tell them they will acheive the status of single mothers without any help from me now get the **** off my wall.

Personally i find the whole thing a bit too disturbing for words.

Edit : The most disturbing thing that has ever happened to me personally was being asked would i like a blowjob by a lass who couldn't have been more than 16 outside a ****ing shop in Sandyford. She was actually dressed like a hooker.

I'm sorry, but what the ****?

LolaLuv

farohar wrote: »

Do the teenagers make this same connection or do they just think it's funny the looks they get when they wear them, much as a child who overhears a bad word will supposedly repeat it just to see the horror on peoples' faces, if you don't pay any notice the child gets bored and gives up using it (no idea how true this is TBH, just something I read).

I used to dress pretty provocatively as a teenager, and that's exactly why. Interesting insight, I had never thought of it really.

A_M101

My mother used to kill me for wearing slutty clothes, as a result I'd always only try one thing at a time i.e short skirt and conservative top and flats or some other combo.

Thank God she did though, I would have worn anything otherwise.:D

(Mind you she still rolls her eyes to heaven at my outfits when I go out with friends from home, I love my short dresses and at my height I just look all leggy and kinda slutty!)

Black Swan

It's part of materialistic western culture where young birds are sex objects, youth is worshiped, and aging is a sin. Because youth is in, models are thin. Consequently, teen models are in greater demand than those in their early 20s, where they dressed and made us up to look adult. So peer conscious pre-teens, and unfortunately their out-to-lunch parents, are following suit (excuse the pun).

hunter164

taconnol wrote: »

So true, it just perpetuates it for both sides. Girls feel its expected of them & guys expect it. It's also a horrible way to view sexiness. I heard them talking on the radio the other day about the muslim scarf & guys were coming on saying that they thought the women covered up were sexier than women showing everything.

Plus I know rape is never the woman's fault but these girls are not doing themselves any favours...

But in all honesty you're not going to go for a bird that's dirty but is dressed like that when you could go for one that's good looking nd dressed moderately.

xzanti

gcgirl wrote: »

I may order 2 of these for my 2 girls !! I'm dreading them going past 10 years of age!!

OMG.. Are those perferations for what I think they're for????? Eeeeeeeewww :eek:

sam34

Curvy Vixen wrote: »

Sure they sell g-strings for 8 and 9 year olds ffs! There was a woman on Gerry Ryan or the like about 6 months ago defending the fact that her 6/7 year old daughter wears them...because she see's her mum wearing them and wants to be like her :eek:

in fairness what sort of a muppet was that mother? as kids we all wanted to wear stuff like our mothers, usualy high heels, and while you'd be let wear them indoors, we were never left out of the house in them. thats proper order. whatever happened to parental cop on and instilling a bit of discipline in kids? whatever happened to saying "no you can't" or "you will be able to when you're older" to kids?

CDfm

there is a lot of pressure on teenage girls.

my daughter is 15 and doesnt dress like a slut - i dont always like what she buys but tell her what looks nice and never criticize

my point- dont be afraid to use non- pc terms to girls to describe clothes and other peoples behavior. it makes you more human

Macha

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

It's part of materialistic western culture where young birds are sex objects, youth is worshiped, and aging is a sin. Because youth is in, models are thin. Consequently, teen models are in greater demand than those in their early 20s, where they dressed and made us up to look adult. So peer conscious pre-teens, and unfortunately their out-to-lunch parents, are following suit (excuse the pun).

Yeah, sometimes I feel like I'm supposed to look like a pre-pubescent boy...

I think the thin thing also has to do with the simple fact that it is really, really hard for the majority of women to look like that. Cue diet magazines, diet pill, diet shakes, diet programmes, diet....ad nauseum. You can't sell something to someone until you convince them there's something wrong with them/something they're missing.

hunter164 wrote: »

But in all honesty you're not going to go for a bird that's dirty but is dressed like that when you could go for one that's good looking nd dressed moderately.

True. And I don't think teenagers understand that.

SarahJ

I swear to God above, if i have girls when I have kids, the are not stepping foot out of the house until they're 21.

I heard the other day that in the under 18 Wesley, the girls tie their underwear around their wrists!

Phlann

They're out there again :eek:

Was out for a smoke a minute ago and one of them came strutting up to me, eyelashes all a-flutter, asking me for a smoke. Then told me I was 'noice lookin'

Can I sue these preteen girls for sexual harassment or would I be laughed out of court?

Stheno

Phlann try Dragan's line on them?


Is part of this that parents actually let kids wear the stuff or do kids do the old trick of changing in a friends house?/

Blush_01

SarahJ wrote: »

I swear to God above, if i have girls when I have kids, the are not stepping foot out of the house until they're 21.

I heard the other day that in the under 18 Wesley, the girls tie their underwear around their wrists!

That's been going on for years.

It's funny, the slutty girls when I was at teenage discos (within the last decade, ta very much) couldn't have dreamed of being as comparatively slutty as the slutty looking girls APPEAR these days. I don't get it.

Piste

Girls in my year now (6th) cringe at some of the stuff they wore when they were in 2nd/3rd year, don't worry, they grow out of it!

Phlann

nouggatti wrote: »

Phlann try Dragan's line on them?

Be pretty harsh to say that to a 13 year old girl now, tbf.

They might look and act slutty, but they're still pretty innocent. They're just mimicking what they see on TV and in music videos.

They'll grow out of it, I'm sure.

I'm only pretending to be scared of them btw :pac:

Stheno

Phlann wrote: »

Be pretty harsh to say that to a 13 year old girl now, tbf.

True, I presume you've tried ignoring them?:D

Phlann

I'm just too polite. I can't just ignore somebody if they come up and talk to me. Although I make a point of giving only short and to-the-point answers so as not to leave any room to strike up a conversation.

And I finish my cigarette as quickly as possible and go inside.

Anyway, soon it'll be too cold out for them to hang around out there anyway. :pac:

hunter164

taconnol wrote: »

True. And I don't think teenagers understand that.

Well I'm 16 and that's with most of my mates aswell.

Macha

hunter164 wrote: »

Well I'm 16 and that's with most of my mates aswell.

Ah yeah, you're right sorry :pac: Should have qualified that statement with a "some". It definitely isn't ALL kids that are doing it. Plus it isn't fair to lump a 19 year old in with a 14 year old with the term "teenagers"

I'm just remembering my 15 year old self going to clubs & thinking that my life was over if the guys there didn't find me attractive. Maybe its just a phase you gotta go through.