It's that time of year again..

Peared

mutant f*cking spiders the size of turnips crawling out of everywhere and in to my house.

Every September, feckers are early this year. Gets to the stage where I cant even watch tv without looking like yer man from the ad with one eye going in a different direction CONVINCED that every small movement and dark spot is another one.

What to do? Is there some kind of, I dunno, shield or powder or something I can put around the house?

Helps.

One jumped on my head last night:(

Peared

LittleNipper wrote: »

One jumped on my head last night:(

:eek:

Don't say that!

chem

is this the type?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-bmK2ACWhc

Common house spider. They appear because they are looking for a mate this time of the year!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/nature/wildfacts/factfiles/348.shtml

Peared

chem wrote: »

is this the type?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-bmK2ACWhc

Common house spider. They appear because they are looking for a mate this time of the year!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/nature/wildfacts/factfiles/348.shtml

I'm sorry but there's nothing common about them.

There's no way they used to be that big when I was younger.

And I was smaller then.

Mutants. Is what they are.

Jimbo

Buy a bag of snakes

demanufactured

ah spiders are ok , they kill flies you see

Spiders are my Kryptonite

chem

Peared wrote: »

I'm sorry but there's nothing common about them.

There's no way they used to be that big when I was younger.

And I was smaller then.

Mutants. Is what they are.

The girlfriend hates spiders (even the little ones). Last summer she wa sitting out the front relaxing, in the sun. She feels what she thinks is one of them fluffy seed things, that blow in the wind on her arm. Looks down to see. Oh YES its a massive house spider, on her arm:D

She ran for hours:pac:

javaboy

Peared wrote: »

What to do? Is there some kind of, I dunno, shield or powder or something I can put around the house?

Helps.

A ring of salt and an oul Latin incantation is your only man. Maybe light some candles too. Preferably citronella as that keeps away flies and indirectly, spiders too.

Peared

javaboy wrote: »

A ring of salt and an oul Latin incantation is your only man. Maybe light some candles too. Preferably citronella as that keeps away flies and indirectly, spiders too.

Ya reckon? K. Hmm.

Think I should be naked for the chanting? I'm thinking that might help. Except for wellies obv.

antodeco

chem wrote: »

Common house spider. They appear because they are looking for a mate this time of the year!

*unzips fly and sits back* Me thinks its time to make a spider baby!

Ruu_Old

I thought it was going to be a thread about Smyths Christmas toy catalogues advertised on telly.

red_ice

last week i saw one standing still on the floor beside my bed just after i dropped me kaks. I got in to bed and turned off the light, waited about 5 minutes because it was on my mind that he was there. so i turned on the light, looked and he was gone. Decided to lie down and there he was above me on the roof right above my feckin bed!

Decided to leave him alone - he was harmless.. then the next day i was in the shower. As i was washing shampoo off my head i looked up and there he was again, so i flicked water at him and he fell into the bath! i got him out, but it was too late - or so i thought! Cleaned him off with toilet paper, left him too dry for 10 minz while i showered, then came back to the tissue and flipped him onto the floor and he scuttled off.

Graaand! I hate spiders, but i wouldn't kill one.. Its bad luck :]

chem

antodeco wrote: »

*unzips fly and sits back* Me thinks its time to make a spider baby!

You think?

Reproduction
After a male has located a female's web he will stay with her for some weeks. During this time he will mate with her a few times before eventually dying. The female does not kill the male, but after he dies she eats him. In this way, the male can contribute to the health of his offspring even after his death.


This sound like any student party ive been at:D

Males of the species are often found trapped in baths in houses. They fall in after wandering around searching for a female, and can't get out

antodeco

chem wrote: »

You think?

. The female does not kill the male, but after he dies she eats him.

Giggidy

Peared

chem wrote: »

You think?

Reproduction
After a male has located a female's web he will stay with her for some weeks. During this time he will mate with her a few times before eventually dying. The female does not kill the male, but after he dies she eats him. In this way, the male can contribute to the health of his offspring even after his death.

Males of the species are often found trapped in baths in houses. They fall in after wandering around searching for a female, and can't get out

Yeah and they're so big that even after you try wash them down the drain you have to poke them down the plughole with cotton buds cos they are freaky huge. It's disgusting. But the option is let them be or *shudder* pick them up. Feck that sh!t.

javaboy

chem wrote: »

Males of the species are often found trapped in baths in houses. They fall in after wandering around searching for a female, and can't get out

We've all been there. Am I right?

Jimbo

chem wrote: »

You think?

Reproduction
After a male has located a female's web he will stay with her for some weeks. During this time he will mate with her a few times before eventually dying. The female does not kill the male, but after he dies she eats him. In this way, the male can contribute to the health of his offspring even after his death.


This sound like any student party ive been at:D

Males of the species are often found trapped in baths in houses. They fall in after wandering around searching for a female, and can't get out

Sounds like alot of work alright. I also have a tendancy to get stuck in the bath

javaboy

Ruu wrote: »

I thought it was going to be a thread about Smyths Christmas toy catalogues advertised on telly.

Smyths are slow off the mark compared to Park Christmas Hampers. Sure I saw an ad for Christmas 2012 there. No joke.

Uthur

it was a mild winter last year so many more survived than usual. there will
be millions of them by september - each bigger than the last :eek:

Horsefumbler

yep its auguest again... :rolleyes:




Deal with them sweetheart.

truecrippler

I hate the feckers. Can't sleep if knowing one is in my room.
Ugly fookers they are. Probably saying the same about me but I'm not the one with 6 legs.

Couldnt kill one though.

javaboy

truecrippler wrote: »

I hate the feckers. Can't sleep if knowing one is in my room.
Ugly fookers they are. Probably saying the same about me but I'm not the one with 6 legs.

Couldnt kill one though.

Neither are they. Well they do have 6 I suppose but then they also have an extra 2.

KBarry

Spiders make me scream like a girl. Try burning incense. Failing that, stand on the fcukers.

redshoulder

I don 't mind them, they keep the moths away.

Dave!

This thread has made me lift my feet off the ground. Thank you. I'll be having nightmares tonight.

AlmightyCushion

It's that time of year again..

What? But I had my shower nearly 2 months ago.

Davidius

I can't say that I've noticed more spiders than usual.

rororoyourboat

There's a spray in Aldi or Lidl that you are meant to put all around the windows and doors and it apparently keeps them all away. I've never used it myself though. I'm thinking, most of them are born in the house, aren't they? So it's not much good really! You just need someone brave to pick them up and let them out the window!

Jay P

Ruu wrote: »

I thought it was going to be a thread about Smyths Christmas toy catalogues advertised on telly.

Lol! Me two! Although I did see that there are christmas trees and decorations in argos now

As for spiders I was painting outside for a few days....it was horrible. They are feckin everywhere. The most frightening thing ever, especially for an aracnophobe like my good self.

xOxSinéadxOx

why does everyone have a problem with spiders?

MOTHS FFS!

MagicMarker

Just be thankful you don't have mosquitos!!

Dinxminx

There's this one little f*cker in my room. I woke up one morning only to find him crawling on my pillow. I flicked him away in my half-asleep, merciful state and I haven't seen him since. He's clearly seen me though -

He's bitten me THREE TIMES since I saw him*. He's like the Vampire Spider! Next time I see him he won't be so lucky...

Anyone know how to make a spider trap?

*No, I haven't developed any special abilities. I checked.

Captain Ginger

xOxSinéadxOx wrote: »

why does everyone have a problem with spiders?

MOTHS FFS!

Yeah I fu<>ing hate them, it's been pretty hot at night so I have my window open, and because I have my computer screen on they all fly in, and the other nigth a massive one entered, I sprayed it with anti wasp spray and it took it down.

Killed a few spiders as well as of late.

KnifeWRENCH

We have a thing that catches them:
http://www.gadgetshop.com/media/gadgetshop/products/ProductGalleryImage3/233460.jpg
My Dad got it for my sister. It comes in handy.

And my Gran is terrified of them, so she has this beeping thing in her hall. Apparently, the noise keeps them away.

I'm not too scared of spiders but I'm not a fan of them either.
Still, I'd prefer to be in a room with 10 spiders than be anywhere near a wasp *shudders*

christeb

Groundskeeper Willy on seeoing the alien: "Kill it, kill it, kill it"
Lisa shines light on alien: "Wait, it's only Mr. Burns"
Willy: "Ahhhh, it's Mr. Burns. KILL IT, KILL IT, KILL IT"

Same appproach to spiders. I don't mind the ones that look slike Daddy Long Legs* with no wings, but the meaty little feckers that you know are just filled with venom and speed, I hate them.

*And yes, I do realise that DDL's are supposedly the most venomous...

Malari

christeb wrote: »

Groundskeeper Willy on seeoing the alien: "Kill it, kill it, kill it"
Lisa shines light on alien: "Wait, it's only Mr. Burns"
Willy: "Ahhhh, it's Mr. Burns. KILL IT, KILL IT, KILL IT"

Same appproach to spiders. I don't mind the ones that look slike Daddy Long Legs* with no wings, but the meaty little feckers that you know are just filled with venom and speed, I hate them.

*And yes, I do realise that DDL's are supposedly the most venomous...

More venomous than monster spiders but they can't bite you - not powerful enough to pierce human skin. Monster spiders however...it's like a wasp sting, bloody painful. So now when I pick them up to throw them out the window I make sure my fingers are nowhere near the fangs.

javaboy

christeb wrote: »

*And yes, I do realise that DDL's are supposedly the most venomous...

Malari wrote: »

More venomous than monster spiders but they can't bite you - not powerful enough to pierce human skin.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrjwaqZfjIY

Urban legend I'm afraid: http://www.snopes.com/critters/wild/longlegs.asp

Harvestmen or DDL as they are sometimes known aren't poisonous or venomous. I think Mythbusters covered it too.

token56

Are these the really quick feckers, I think there cool to be honest, they must be pissing themselves knowing the scare some many people, although then they just get stood on.

Only one way to overcome your fear, fill a bath with them and jump right in

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

What, spider on a beermat, beermat in the bath and see if he likes rafting...?

Malari

javaboy wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrjwaqZfjIY

Urban legend I'm afraid: http://www.snopes.com/critters/wild/longlegs.asp

Harvestmen or DDL as they are sometimes known aren't poisonous or venomous. I think Mythbusters covered it too.

Not to humans! But all spiders are venomous to some degree.

kmick

Dinxminx wrote: »

There's this one little f*cker in my room. I woke up one morning only to find him crawling on my pillow. I flicked him away in my half-asleep, merciful state and I haven't seen him since. He's clearly seen me though -

He's bitten me THREE TIMES since I saw him*. He's like the Vampire Spider! Next time I see him he won't be so lucky...

Anyone know how to make a spider trap?

*No, I haven't developed any special abilities. I checked.

Spiders can bite you but there jaws are so weak they cant break the skin. They are just curious not malevolent. Next time you see one say hello and leave it be. Its bad luck to kill one.

Steve_o

I don't mind them so much, its the moths i hate... evil baxtards!!!

javaboy

Malari wrote: »

Not to humans! But all spiders are venomous to some degree.

Yes true. I meant to say 'to humans'.

Malari

javaboy wrote: »

Yes true. I meant to say 'to humans'.

S'allright. I love mythbusters didn't see the DLL one yet

Dinxminx

kmick wrote: »

Spiders can bite you but there jaws are so weak they cant break the skin. They are just curious not malevolent. Next time you see one say hello and leave it be. Its bad luck to kill one.

Oh I wouldn't kill it. I just wouldn't allow him to live in my room any more. I can't kill things, and I actually like creepy crawlies (anyone else think Woodlice are the cutest things ever? No? Just me then..)

Also found this on a mythbuster site (just looked it up): "There are well-documented human bite cases from spiders as small as 3 millimeters long. (The bites caused no ill effects, of course!) It's not that spiders can't bite, but that they don't bite except very rarely."

My Charlotte was suffering some serious PMS last week, that's all.

Also, if it's not a spider biting me then what the hell else could it be? They're certainly not mosquito bites..

christeb

Bad luck to kill them is it??

How much bad luck have I brought on myself with the 6 I've killed in the last week?

javaboy

When I was a young'un my friend and I used to collect spiders from all around and transplant them to a massive bush in his garden. I got bitten on the palm of the hand once for my troubles by one of these girls: http://www.littlehistories.co.uk/images/2007/09/22/garden_spider_cr.jpg

We stuck to that type of garden spider. The "bite" didn't break the skin or hurt really but it did pinch and managed to hold on even when I turned my hand upside down. Them were the days.

RandolphEsq

KBarry wrote: »

Failing that, stand on the fcukers.

I couldn't do that. The crunch and squelch is too horrible . . . I'd prefer to just throw something heavy on it.
I also have a fear that they will jump up onto my face if I get to close and stare at them.
Last night I had a nightmare of big spiders. I was in my house when one big massive one appeared and then a few more crawled out of the floor so I turned to run and then ran into a giant web and got stuck. Then they all started crawling over my body and face rubbing their hairy legs all over me . . . . I still get hard thinking about it . . . . That was a joke there, it was awful

redshoulder

I just trap them and put them outside.