I'm upset after a driving lesson.

sunnyside

I'm just learning to drive, can stop and start, change gears ok but still do it wrong sometimes. The usual learner situation.

Today was my 3rd lesson with an instructor, my 2nd lesson with this instructor. One of the lessons I did with someone else.

The guy has managed to upset me and I think he's slowing my progress down.


On the first lesson he asked "why doesn't a good looking girl like you have a boyfriend?" Now I thought this was way out of order and it made me uncomfortable. So uncomfortable that I really wanted to cancel the next lesson but I didn't because it's been kind of difficult to even get the appointments.


Today when I made a friendly comment about how this job must be really boring sometimes he replied "It's ok when I'm giving lessons to a good looking girl like you" He also commented on my tan.

Now I'm not overly sensitive but this really is out of order. If he was closer to my age and chatty in general I'm sure I'd be more than happy to discuss my relationship status with him but he made me uncomfortable.


As well as this I feel he's putting no effort into my lessons, today we drove around a housing estate in circles for 15 minutes less than the hour I paid for. There was no traffic and I did very little gear changing. I feel he's slowing me down by getting me to do far less than I'm able for. The other guy made a real effort to help me improve and was really professional and encouraging so I'm definitely doing more lessons with him.


But back to today's guy, he knows I'm working as opposed to a younger person who's parents might be paying and he appears to be seeing me as easy money. The less he lets me learn the more money he thinks he'll get from me. Today he tried to book me more lessons but I made an excuse about not knowing when I could do them.

I'm almost 30, have got to driving a bit later than most people posting here. He appears to be in his mid 50's. As well as being annoyed for myself I hope he's not doing the same to 17 year old girls who he probably meets more of than older people like me who can look out for themselves.

As far as I know this guy is RSA approved and I think the other guy who was brilliant isn't.

Not looking for advice, I know what to do- I'm going to cancel the final booking I have with him and get my lessons from someone else. I'm really annoyed that I've given him €80 and have learned nothing helpful. In fact I feel I was doing better before I got in his car because he's knocked my confidence a bit.

I don't have a car to practice in any more so I need a lot of lessons, I plan on getting my own car in September.

I've read advice in this forum from people saying that 10-20 professional lessons would get you to test standard or almost anyway and that was my plan. I want to do 4 lessons a week but having to cancel lessons and re-book more is slowing my plan way down. There are waiting lists for appointments and there's a chance I could get someone else equally useless.

Any similar stories or general encouragement appreciated.:)

Fighting Irish

Tell him you hate getting driving lessons, and if he asks why, tell him you don't like "ugly SNIP driving instructers "

If he was the tester i'd say some completely different

Caychadh

I booked a course of ten with a Dublin driving school. My instructor was a nice guy, but I just didn't gel with him. So I got a second lesson with someone else, but he doesn't know my area too well so I asked for someone else the third time who I liked a lot. However, when I booked my fourth they said 'he's on holidays, do you want to pospone a week?' I said 'no, sure just give me anyone'. Bamn! Fourth lesson and I got instructor who ticks all the boxes.. nice bloke, friendly but not intrusively so, knows his stuff, my test route etc. I'm now really happy and just finishing the course. The first three lessons weren't wasted as it's a reputable school and they seem to have good instructors, all RSA approved. It took me a while to get the perfect instructor but once I did I made grand progress and really enjoy my lessons.
Not being stuck with the one teacher is a great benefit of a driving school. Find the one you like, then keep them! Perseverence is the key!

You don't have to take this crap from an instructor. Go back to your old one, find a female teacher or change to a different school. You shouldn't have to spend money on lessons you don't enjoy and aren't making any progress with.

Nickibaby*

Don't let him knock your confidence, he sounds like a complete twat.

Still going around a housing estate after 3 lessons :eek:

I was lucky enough to get an excellent instructor first time, keep changing until you find one you like that gives you confidence. Your paying them at the end of the day and it's up to you if you want to continue taking lessons with them.

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

sunnyside

Caychadh wrote: »

It took me a while to get the perfect instructor but once I did I made grand progress and really enjoy my lessons.
Not being stuck with the one teacher is a great benefit of a driving school. Find the one you like, then keep them! Perseverence is the key!

You don't have to take this crap from an instructor. Go back to your old one, find a female teacher or change to a different school. You shouldn't have to spend money on lessons you don't enjoy and aren't making any progress with.

Thanks for your replies. This is exactly what I want to hear.

I'm not in Dublin and could find only 1 female instructor in my area. I rang her, she asked what level I was at and I said I'd had a few lessons with someone else. Then she didn't want to know, told me it was best to do all my lessons with the one person and wouldn't give me any lessons. I'd have expected her to take the booking anyway, don't these people need the work?

Actually everyone apart from you guys wants me to do all my lessons with the same person.

I have another lesson booked with the nice and really good instructor for next week but I'm so desperate to make progress I'm really annoyed at having to cancel the other lesson this week.

I'd almost do it anyway for the practice but I just know it would knock my confidence even more. By the end of the lesson in the housing estate today I felt miserable. I just wanted to get out of the car and away from him. Then he gave out to me for not looking around enough when turning right, in an area where I hadn't met more than 3 moving cars in the entire lesson.

I'm still really annoyed, I need to be doing lessons in the sort of area where people actually drive.

Caychadh

sunnyside wrote: »

booked with the nice and really good instructor for next week but I'm so desperate to make progress I'm really annoyed at having to cancel the other lesson this week.

Don't be annoyed. You tried an instructor that's a bit of a prat, now you are going back to the good one who will hopefully build your confidence and get you driving! Don't be miffed at missing out on a lesson this week. You say you want to make progress but you don't make progress with this other instructor anyway. Don't waste any more money on him! Start next week in a better frame of mind and you'll do fine!

sunnyside

Thank you. I know it's not worth being upset about, I just needed someone else to tell me that. Will have to forget about it and wake up tomorrow in a better frame of mind.

Hope you're making good progress:)

Wishbone Ash

We've had a few similar threads over the past couple of years. I'm wondering if it's the same instructor!

sunnyside - sorry for your hassle.

Is he working independently or is he with a 'school'?

You should consider reporting him (either to his employer or the RSA). It's totally unacceptable and, as as you say, if he tries this with a 30 year old, what about vulnerable 17 year olds.

Good luck with your lessons.

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

Ah-Watch

what area are u looking for lessons in? are maybe it might be easier just say what county, people could give you an idea who may suit you, and you could take it from there

sunnyside

Wishbone Ash wrote: »

We've had a few similar threads over the past couple of years. I'm wondering if it's the same instructor!

sunnyside - sorry for your hassle.

Is he working independently or is he with a 'school'?

You should consider reporting him (either to his employer or the RSA). It's totally unacceptable and, as as you say, if he tries this with a 30 year old, what about vulnerable 17 year olds.

Good luck with your lessons.

Thank you:) He works independently in Cork city.

donegalfella wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

It's Cork city so not a small town but I'd say a lot of the instructors do know each other. When you call them they seem obsessed with finding out who else was giving you lessons. They seem to take it very personally whereas the learners ringing up mostly don't know one of these people from the next so it's not personal at all. Have learned that it's easier to lie.

I don't doubt that most of them are professional, as I said the other guy was great and I have another lesson with him next week. I'm just cranky tonight because I paid for the service and all I got was the hassel of dealing with the person providing the service.:mad:

Feel free to recommend people to me or pm because I expect it's not ok to post personal details here.

And a nosey question:pAre some of the people who post here or the Mods driving instructors? Just asking because there's loads of excellent advice in the older threads I was reading.

Thanks for your support guys:)

Tan Princess

That's disgraceful poor you. You should report him to whoever monitors driving instructors as he could be worse to someone else. My sister had a sleazy driving instructor who tried to grope her and resulted in her refusing to take lessons for years after it and not learning to drive until her 30s.

munsterlegend

so why doesn't a good looking girl like you not have a b/f? and is the tan real?

surprised an instructor would be so forward in whats supposed to be a profession environment. what age is he?

sunnyside wrote: »

I'm just learning to drive, can stop and start, change gears ok but still do it wrong sometimes. The usual learner situation.

Today was my 3rd lesson with an instructor, my 2nd lesson with this instructor. One of the lessons I did with someone else.

The guy has managed to upset me and I think he's slowing my progress down.


On the first lesson he asked "why doesn't a good looking girl like you have a boyfriend?" Now I thought this was way out of order and it made me uncomfortable. So uncomfortable that I really wanted to cancel the next lesson but I didn't because it's been kind of difficult to even get the appointments.


Today when I made a friendly comment about how this job must be really boring sometimes he replied "It's ok when I'm giving lessons to a good looking girl like you" He also commented on my tan.

Now I'm not overly sensitive but this really is out of order. If he was closer to my age and chatty in general I'm sure I'd be more than happy to discuss my relationship status with him but he made me uncomfortable.


As well as this I feel he's putting no effort into my lessons, today we drove around a housing estate in circles for 15 minutes less than the hour I paid for. There was no traffic and I did very little gear changing. I feel he's slowing me down by getting me to do far less than I'm able for. The other guy made a real effort to help me improve and was really professional and encouraging so I'm definitely doing more lessons with him.


But back to today's guy, he knows I'm working as opposed to a younger person who's parents might be paying and he appears to be seeing me as easy money. The less he lets me learn the more money he thinks he'll get from me. Today he tried to book me more lessons but I made an excuse about not knowing when I could do them.

I'm almost 30, have got to driving a bit later than most people posting here. He appears to be in his mid 50's. As well as being annoyed for myself I hope he's not doing the same to 17 year old girls who he probably meets more of than older people like me who can look out for themselves.

As far as I know this guy is RSA approved and I think the other guy who was brilliant isn't.

Not looking for advice, I know what to do- I'm going to cancel the final booking I have with him and get my lessons from someone else. I'm really annoyed that I've given him €80 and have learned nothing helpful. In fact I feel I was doing better before I got in his car because he's knocked my confidence a bit.

I don't have a car to practice in any more so I need a lot of lessons, I plan on getting my own car in September.

I've read advice in this forum from people saying that 10-20 professional lessons would get you to test standard or almost anyway and that was my plan. I want to do 4 lessons a week but having to cancel lessons and re-book more is slowing my plan way down. There are waiting lists for appointments and there's a chance I could get someone else equally useless.

Any similar stories or general encouragement appreciated.:)

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

sunnyside

munsterlegend wrote: »

so why doesn't a good looking girl like you not have a b/f? and is the tan real?
what age is he?

:P I'm no supermodel or anything- I used to have a boyfriend, he cheated on me, I dumped him. It's no big secret but I don't want to discuss it with a driving instructor. Even stranger there is no tan that I'm aware of, I don't use fake tan and haven't been on holidays anywhere hot. He's about 55 I'd say.

donegalfella wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

I agree it's strange, you'd think it'd be no problem to get lessons in Cork. I called loads of numbers and left messages but very few of them rang back.

I don't specifically need a female instructor , have no issues with men in general, just that one guy.

munsterlegend

he obviously couldn't help himself..User name: sunnyside...and no tan? its hard enough learning without listening to that..ever think of learning outside cork city? i live approx 20 to 30 mins away and could give you the name of a good one.

towel401

ah jeez, doesn't take much to upset a little girl these days. i'm not saying the OP is like this but most of them are oul shlags that get pissed every day, shag everything that moves but as soon as something like this happens or they get a text from someone they don't know then they're all bent out of shape.

last time I was in this forum I saw a thread almost exactly like this one

Wishbone Ash

towel401 wrote: »

ah jeez, doesn't take much to upset a little girl these days. i'm not saying the OP is like this but most of them are oul shlags that get pissed every day, shag everything that moves but as soon as something like this happens or they get a text from someone they don't know then they're all bent out of shape.

last time I was in this forum I saw a thread almost exactly like this one

Take a little break towel401 - you're banned from this Forum.

Wishbone Ash

sunnyside wrote: »

And a nosey question:pAre some of the people who post here or the Mods driving instructors? Just asking because there's loads of excellent advice in the older threads I was reading

I'm not a driving instructor, nor do I have any connection with the RSA/SGS. I just have an interest in the subject over many years. As far as I know Alanstrainor isn't an instructor either, nor does he have any connection with the RSA/SGS either (AFAIK).

There are some driving instructors who post occasionally and some ex-examiners AFAIK. (PS - it can be difficult to know if a poster is an instructor as we do not permit them to 'pimp' their own business in their posts).

wil

OP The key to passing your test quickly and first time is to find a good instructor.
As this guy is obviously anything but a good instructor in every sense of the word, dont waste another moment with him.
Try as many instructors as it takes (within reason) until you find one that is both good and right for you. You will thank yourself for it.

I too am not an instructor or in any way connected with any driving school. I have done a fair bit of driving in almost every condition for quite a while now and I'm still learning. I did have the benefit of an excellent instructor after trying 2 rubbish ones. The difference is immense. I also had the benefit of learning in the UK. (the rubbish ones I tried in Ireland before going there) He got me from 0 to pass in less than 6 weeks without any other access to a car. Years later I still hold him in high regard as I certainly would not consider myself a gifted or natural born driver. Most of my UK friends are technically way better drivers than I, because they started much younger and are naturally adept behind the wheel.

When trying out other instructors, just tell them you are starting, dont tell them about other instructors, that's none of their business. You could in fact use 2 different instructors on alternate days, so what is it to them, you are not entering in to a binding contract for your business. Let them operate according to their own merit and reputation. A good instructor should have your best interests in mind, not whether he is taking away business from a mediocre one.

And learning to drive should in fact be a bit fun

Alanstrainor

Wishbone Ash wrote: »

I'm not a driving instructor, nor do I have any connection with the RSA/SGS. I just have an interest in the subject over many years. As far as I know Alanstrainor isn't an instructor either, nor does he have any connection with the RSA/SGS either (AFAIK).

There are some driving instructors who post occasionally and some ex-examiners AFAIK. (PS - it can be difficult to know if a poster is an instructor as we do not permit them to 'pimp' their own business in their posts).

Yup, i have no connection with RSA or SGS. Just a regular joe who has an interest in the subject.

SeanW

Sunnyside, don't let that numbskull get you down - you've just faced the perennial problem faced by many learner drivers - crap driving instructors. The carry on of this particular individual was beyond uncalled for, to say the least.

Count yourself lucky you didn't do like what I did - I paid €400+ for a bunch of lessons only to have to change driving schools after failing 3 test, the day before the last one, a substitute instructor from that school, while preparing me for the theory part of the test, asked me about the old end-of-posted-speed-limits signs. This was in 2007.

After changing to a better instructor, I found out why I was still stalling the car at junctions and making 'jumpy' transitions on the gears after 6-12 months driving (didn't know that I should ease off the clutch), didn't know how to do the turnabout properly (had been turning the wheel when the car was stopped ) etc.

Passed the next test with only 1 Grade 2 fault.

Moral of the story: when you recognise you're using a bad driving instructor/school, dump them like a hot potato, then forget about it and move on.

For obvious reasons I won't be naming the driving school in question but I do recommend the better instructor from time to time.

the corpo

if you can you should try and block book the instructor you like too?

fasterkitten

sunnyside wrote: »

Today when I made a friendly comment about how this job must be really boring

Well that was pretty rude and condescending.

If you don't want to stand up to him, don't have any more lessons with him. There's no reason why you should feel you have to pay to be made feel uncomfortable.

wil

SeanW wrote: »

Moral of the story: when you recognise you're using a bad driving instructor/school, dump them like a hot potato, then forget about it and move on.
.

Exactly. very good advice.

I'm surprised people are so shocked about the 'good looking girl' comments. I don't think it's all that inappropriate at all. My instructor is always saying stuff like that, I just take it as a joke. He's otherwise an excellent instructor. The other guy I sometimes get is the same. There's a difference between silly comments and feeling your leg! Maybe it's just me but I hardly ever meet any man over 50 who doesn't make comments like that. Happens to me at work, in college and randomly. If it makes you uncomfortable, fair enough, but I think it's a bit of an overreaction. I'd be more worried about him making it too easy for you - I started with an instructor like that and it was so frustrating until I finally changed instructor and realised I could do so much more than driving around housing estates and quiet roads.

Wishbone Ash

[quote=[Deleted User];57128396]I'm surprised people are so shocked about the 'good looking girl' comments. I don't think it's all that inappropriate at all. My instructor is always saying stuff like that, I just take it as a joke. He's otherwise an excellent instructor. The other guy I sometimes get is the same. There's a difference between silly comments and feeling your leg! Maybe it's just me but I hardly ever meet any man over 50 who doesn't make comments like that. Happens to me at work, in college and randomly. If it makes you uncomfortable, fair enough, but I think it's a bit of an overreaction. I'd be more worried about him making it too easy for you - I started with an instructor like that and it was so frustrating until I finally changed instructor and realised I could do so much more than driving around housing estates and quiet roads.[/QUOTE]I presuming that you are a female! What on earth has your 'looks' got to do with Learing to Drive?

If you went to your GP for a breast examination and the GP said "that's a nice pair you have there" (or something similar) wouldn't you consider it to be unprofessional?

It's no different for a Driving Instructor. He should not treat a male learner any differently from a female learner and I find it incredible that you find it acceptable from an older man. If anything, it should be even more unacceptable from an older man.

I work with a lot of young girls and there is not way in the world that I would even contemplate saying anything remotely like that! :eek: :eek:

sunnyside

Wishbone Ash wrote: »

He should not treat a male learner any differently from a female learner and I find it incredible that you find it acceptable from an older man. If anything, it should be even more unacceptable from an older man.

I work with a lot of young girls and there is not way in the world that I would even contemplate saying anything remotely like that! :eek: :eek:

Anna Miniature Varnish I would say you're welcome to my old instructor but I'm still so annoyed with him I wouldn't want anyone else giving him any business. I am surprised you think it's ok, I'm not that sensitive but something about him made me feel uncomfortable. It wasn't the age thing, a few years back I went out went a lovely man who was 20 years older than me but I definitely wouldn't make an exception for someone's inappropiate behaviour because of their age.

And just to update the story, he called me to ask if I wanted to book more lessons. Number was blocked when he called so I had to speak to him. I said no obviously.

meremortal

Thats awful about that instructor - know what you mean - I could handle myself but it could really turn a younger girl off driving. In terms of using different instructors - I had a few lessons with one originally, then moved so did 5 lessons with another one - was really interesting to see the different tips etc they gave me.

Have my test on Friday so have done two pre- tests with two completely different instructors who work on the route where my test is to make sure that its not just one opinion I'm getting, and also so I'm used to someone I dont know testing me. I found with the guy I had for 5 lessons - I felt as though when I made a mistake he'd know it was a once off, or would be accepting or would know how far I had come - its good to go with people who have no idea of your skill or bad habits!!!! Good luck with the test!!

jobucks

Hi Sunyside,

I've just PM'd you with details of the guy I've been getting lessons with lately... Not female but I found him very helpful. Doing my test tomorrow so I'll let you know then just how good he was

towel401

Wishbone Ash wrote: »

Take a little break towel401 - you're banned from this Forum.

is that what you do with everyone who doesn't go along with the popular opinion ?

gone are the days when you actually had to sexually harass someone before you got in trouble for it. now oversensitive & paranoid types make a big deal about every little remark and just can't take it as a complement so then they feel the need to go on and discredit the guy and try to get him sacked. What the hell is wrong with people these days? The amount of paranoia surrounding stalkers, paedophiles and dirty old men in general has got way out of hand.

Call someone from a blocked number / different phone - you're a stalker.

Give a younger girl a complement - you're a dirty old pervert.

Walk past a playground too slowly - you're a paedophile.

Posy

I don't think the OP was upset by someone paying her a compliment. I'm sure she'd be grand if a guy her own age was in a bar and said she's lovely looking. The point was the context of the remarks. The instructor is meant to be a professional and shouldn't comment on such things during a driving lesson- it's pretty inappropriate and he should have better discretion. Imagine if a bloke went to a doctor with a problem 'down there' and the older male doctor started saying 'wow, you're so well hung, you should have no problems getting a girlfriend..' It's not appropriate and would be pretty creepy, whereas if a girl said that on the night after your first date you'd probably be quite chuffed.

Alanstrainor

towel401 wrote: »

is that what you do with everyone who doesn't go along with the popular opinion ?

gone are the days when you actually had to sexually harass someone before you got in trouble for it. now oversensitive & paranoid types make a big deal about every little remark and just can't take it as a complement so then they feel the need to go on and discredit the guy and try to get him sacked. What the hell is wrong with people these days? The amount of paranoia surrounding stalkers, paedophiles and dirty old men in general has got way out of hand.

Call someone from a blocked number / different phone - you're a stalker.

Give a younger girl a complement - you're a dirty old pervert.

Walk past a playground too slowly - you're a paedophile.

Your post was both insulting towards the OP and way off topic, you deserved what you got. I'm not too sure what the point of that rant above was?
This is not After Hours, the OP came with a problem, and was getting constructive advise until your post. Your post added nothing to this thread.

towel401

Caderyn wrote: »

I don't think the OP was upset by someone paying her a compliment. I'm sure she'd be grand if a guy her own age was in a bar and said she's lovely looking. The point was the context of the remarks. The instructor is meant to be a professional and shouldn't comment on such things during a driving lesson- it's pretty inappropriate and he should have better discretion. Imagine if a bloke went to a doctor with a problem 'down there' and the older male doctor started saying 'wow, you're so well hung, you should have no problems getting a girlfriend..' It's not appropriate and would be pretty creepy, whereas if a girl said that on the night after your first date you'd probably be quite chuffed.

i wouldn't mind a bit a bit, probably just laugh at it - its not a negative remark so not the slightest bit offensive to me.

i wish people would just relax and stop taking this stuff so seriously the guy probably meant nothing by it. but you said if it's some guy her own age she wouldn't mind, so does that mean if it was someone older she would mind?

the only reason someone older can't say she's lovely is because of all the mass paranoia surrounding dirty old perverts.

Wishbone Ash

towel401 - Permabanned from Learning to Drive.

Kanney

sunnyside wrote: »

"why doesn't a good looking girl like you have a boyfriend?"

To be honest, I didnt read after this, all I came to say is that was extremely out of order.

sunnyside

Kanney wrote: »

To be honest, I didnt read after this, all I came to say is that was extremely out of order.

Thank you for understanding, I know some people here think I'm being oversensitive.


I'm very happy with my new instructor and am moving on to do pre-test lessons next week. Have a test appointment for November. I would love to pass, I only started in August so I might be a bit over-ambitious but at worst I'll fail so it's worth trying.

My main problem at the moment is reversing and parking. I'm moving too quickly when reversing. I have to reverse out of my drive so there's no way of avoiding it. It stresses me out.

This forum is so, so helpful. I want to say thanks again to everyone for posting here. I'm sure it helps lots of lurkers as well as the people like me who post their problems.

Wishbone Ash

sunnyside wrote: »

Have a test appointment for November. I would love to pass, I only started in August

Just checking sunnyside - are you on a 1st Learner Permit? and will you have had it for at least 6 months by November?

sunnyside

Wishbone Ash wrote: »

Just checking sunnyside - are you on a 1st Learner Permit? and will you have had it for at least 6 months by November?

No, 2nd. I did a few lessons on the 1st one in college but didn't have a car and the cost of lessons became prohibitive very quickly so learning to drive got abandoned. Now that I have the car I have to stick with it.

I know about the 6 month rule but thank you for pointing it out:)

Posy

sunnyside wrote: »

My main problem at the moment is reversing and parking. I'm moving too quickly when reversing.

Ugh, I'm the same, I either mount the path (oops) or do such a wide reverse that I end up on the other side of the road (double oops) but keep persevering. And I'm convinced that if I'm called for a test I'll bump the kerb when reversing- my instructor still tells me when to stop because I just can't judge how near or far I am to the kerb. Sigh.
This might sound bad but it's nice to hear other people talk about how difficult they're finding learning to drive on this forum. So many people I know just seemed to have breezed through it. ("I might learn to drive.. I've had three lessons, sure I'll apply for the test.. yay, passed.. just bought a car.. going on a driving holiday in Europe.." in the space of 3 months etc) It's good to know I'm not alone and there's other people who find it a frightening and frustrating experience but one which will gradually get easier and eventually be conquered..
I hope.

sunnyside

Caderyn wrote: »

So many people I know just seemed to have breezed through it. ("I might learn to drive.. I've had three lessons, sure I'll apply for the test.. yay, passed.. just bought a car.. going on a driving holiday in Europe.." in the space of 3 months etc) It's good to know I'm not alone and there's other people who find it a frightening and frustrating experience

I hear and read that everywhere and it's intimidating me. The usual thing seems to be 10 lessons and then apply for and pass a test with no further driving experience.

I started in August, have done 12 lessons and bought the car which is mostly sitting unused in my drive adding to the stress.

I have a test appointment for the start of November which is 3 months on from when I started but my confidence is pretty low at the moment.

I was much more confident when I started than I am now. I suppose I assumed it was going to be easy. If it was difficult there wouldn't be so many cars on the roads.

I can start, stop, change gears really well, do hill starts, left and right turns, I know how to use indicators at roundabouts but I'm bad at reversing and turning and parking. The budget was for 10 lessons (1 and a 1/2 hour lessons) but doing one lesson a week from now until the test nearly brings it to 20 lessons so the cost is adding to the stress.

I hate learning to drive. I also decided yesterday that I would never ever be able to teach someone else to drive, it's way too stressful.

:mad:

valer456

MOD EDIT>

Alanstrainor

valer456 Banned for a week.

nacho libre

Caderyn wrote: »

Ugh, I'm the same, I either mount the path (oops) or do such a wide reverse that I end up on the other side of the road (double oops) but keep persevering. And I'm convinced that if I'm called for a test I'll bump the kerb when reversing- my instructor still tells me when to stop because I just can't judge how near or far I am to the kerb. Sigh.
This might sound bad but it's nice to hear other people talk about how difficult they're finding learning to drive on this forum. So many people I know just seemed to have breezed through it. ("I might learn to drive.. I've had three lessons, sure I'll apply for the test.. yay, passed.. just bought a car.. going on a driving holiday in Europe.." in the space of 3 months etc) It's good to know I'm not alone and there's other people who find it a frightening and frustrating experience but one which will gradually get easier and eventually be conquered..
I hope.

It certainly is:) most of my friends tell me they never need to use the handbrake when driving. I know that's not good driving practice but it shows they have perfected the balance between the clutch and accelerator - something i still haven't mastered after nine months of driving. Which is extremely frustrating as i have driven a fair bit.
As a consequence of all this i dread seeing a line of slow-moving cars in front of me on a hill. You get away with less than perfect footwork on the flat but on hills you are found out which results in the odd cut out for me:(

-dmo7-

Han't read everybopdys thread now but don't go back to him, there are plenty more willing driving instructors around that will help you pass. If he makes you unconfortable don't go back to him, thats being unprofessional on his behalf. My instructor was being unprofessional imo by saying rude things about women and people of other nationalities, so I complained and never went back to him.

Pythia

I just had a very similar incident with a driving school in <SNIP>.

I have had a gigantic amount of lessons already and have a test coming up so I booked two lessons with a different school to see if there's anything someone else missed.

The instructor kept touching my shoulder and called me a 'naughty girl' in a really pervy tone when I forgot to indicate. It really freaked me out. I had asked to do very specific things in the lesson as there are certain areas I'm keen to improve on (the 'normal driving' element of the test, not the 3 manoeuvres, rules of the road or bonnet checks).

He forced me to do all the manoeuvres even though I had specifically said I didn't want to do them. He tried to do the bonnet check with me twice, both times I refused. He then cut the lesson short 10 minutes early, told me I could get a different instructor and slammed the door. During the lesson, he had me drive around the same area again and again, even though I know the route and it's far bigger.

All I wanted was practice on the general driving element like turning normal corners etc because that's what I am weakest on.

When my boyfriend called the school, they claimed 'most people just go along' with the touching. Wtf?

Currently looking for a refund, manager will be in touch on Monday.

bstar

ive also had issues with a popular driving school in <SNIP>. finishes lessons ten mins early everytime, curses when i do something wrong like hit a kerb but doesnt actually correct my technique so i dont do it again:mad::mad::mad:

Susyblue

That instructor is VERY unprofessional! At least when all the instructors have to be approved soon they will be an official body to complain to. You were right to drop him sunnyside, learning to drive is hard enough without adding his sleeziness into the equation aswell!

I'm learning in cork city aswell and also had a useless instructor, almost 400 euro later i finally got a good one!! Its hard to know whether you're being ripped off or not!

Good luck with the test!

coolshark

sunnyside wrote: »

Thank you:) He works independently in Cork city.



It's Cork city so not a small town but I'd say a lot of the instructors do know each other. When you call them they seem obsessed with finding out who else was giving you lessons. They seem to take it very personally whereas the learners ringing up mostly don't know one of these people from the next so it's not personal at all. Have learned that it's easier to lie.

I don't doubt that most of them are professional, as I said the other guy was great and I have another lesson with him next week. I'm just cranky tonight because I paid for the service and all I got was the hassel of dealing with the person providing the service.:mad:

Feel free to recommend people to me or pm because I expect it's not ok to post personal details here.

And a nosey question:pAre some of the people who post here or the Mods driving instructors? Just asking because there's loads of excellent advice in the older threads I was reading.

Thanks for your support guys:)

Hi Sunnyside

I'm a driving instructor and own <SNIP>. I'm 31 myself so am one of the few younger driving instructors in the country plus I'm RSA Approved.

I hear this complaint alot. It is the job of the instructor to make the client feel comfortable and be professional at all times. Ok fair enough, we're all human but there is a line you do not cross and if you do expect the consequences. I'm paid to teach you to drive plus make learning to drive fun and practical. Ok later on in the lessons we can chat away when you get to a standard that you dont need so much supervision and need to be told to change gear etc. Its just a pity you dont live in North Dublin.

Some of the older instructors are a bit let us say "pervy" I heard one girl tell me hers used to comment on her clothes and lean across her for no reason. You could try and report him but like the others say just get someone else. There are plenty of instructors in any major city. Some women only want femaile instructors but I've taught so many men and women to drive so that should not be a major issue. If you are not getting the value for money or you are not developing or progessing then go somewhere else.

It used to be a done thing to just waste time and not teach someone too much too early to get more lessons out of them but those kind of instructors are just chancing their arm. Use your instinct.

Hope this helps.

sunnyside

coolshark wrote: »

I'm a driving instructor and own <SNIP>. I'm 31 myself so am one of the few younger driving instructors in the country plus I'm RSA Approved.


It used to be a done thing to just waste time and not teach someone too much too early to get more lessons out of them but those kind of instructors are just chancing their arm. Use your instinct.

Hope this helps.

Why are there so few young driving instructors? It's a good job, why doesn't it attract younger people. Don't lots of young modified car enthusiasts love driving and cars, it would be a good career for them.

The wasting time thing, I can totally understand the thinking behind it but:mad:

I have a good instructor now, he's male but that's fine because he's friendly and professional. But if female instructors were as plentiful as male I'd have chosen a female.