Clarification/Apology.

TerrorFirmer

There's been an awful amount of mis-interpretation regarding my post relating to a certain member of the boards.ie community who passed away last year. True, I posted it in the worst place possible, and for that I am incredibly remorseful and accept that the ban was deserved for sheer insensitivity. I regarded the thread as a commentary thread, forgetting to realize that it was not such a thread but a remembrance one - it was not an intentional effort to blacken an otherwise positive thread and it is incredibly embarrassing for me to have to deal with having done that in the face of so many friends and even family. I feel it's pretty important that I clarify this; I post here enough and I respect the community, even if it appeared otherwise yesterday.

The issue for a lot of people, was not that I posted it in a wholly inappropriate place, but that I was even daring to speak about it - some people seem to believe that you simply can't speak of the dead. Someone actually used 'speak ill of the dead', but that's an unfortunate and totally misleading phrase - nowhere did I attempt to insinuate that the person in question was not the outstanding, general all around friendly character that he was to everyone who knew him. That's the sad underlying message - victims of drugs and substances are not simply faceless individuals of an apparently lower worth that the media and general conditioning would have us believe. They are people like you and me. This whole issue was never about logic as a person, it was never about anyone in particular who takes drugs, or attempting to 'force' a moralistic message - it was simply a sad, and equally jarring warning over the potential dangers of taking up recreational drugs. I bear no ill will towards anyone who takes drugs, in any capacity, I simply believe that the more people are aware of the potential devastation they cause, the better our country and society are for it. There was a complete and utter tendency to regard my comments as personal attacks on the individual in question, which is about as far away from the truth as possible. I only had minor interaction with Logic1, true, only in the most casual of senses, but always found him a good laugh and in particular, we shared a good laugh over the fictional 'Caucasian Boards Beers' two or three years back. I was stunned by his passing as was everyone else, in fact, it actually plagued me for a long period of time, mulling over the tragedy of a such a young, fit man passing before his time. Did the details of his passing alter my opinion of him? Not in the slightest bit. I would even go so far as to say I lost a little sleep over it, and that's the honest truth. It simply made me sad that his life had to end in such an avoidable manner. As someone else said, there were so many other things he could have done with his life, and such an awful turn of events reflects the experiences of many families throughout the country.

Was I personally attacking logic1 in posting the conclusions of his death? Absolutely not, in any capacity. I only hoped that such a sad case that struck a nerve with so many people would present an even greater and further reaching message about the dangers of drugs. Logic was no doubt a great person, and regardless he always will be to those who know him - I would never, ever attempt to change that viewpoint for any reason, but people seem to think that was my intention. It was not. Nothing will change who he was as a person.

When Katy French died, when the young men from Waterford died from ingesting excessive cocaine, boards.ie was rife with wholly inappropriate commentary on both sides of the fence - good versus bad, deserving versus undeserving, and so on - which was generally allowed continue, with some members even going as disgusting far as propagating the law regarding defamation of the death. To say I was disgusted is an understatement, I felt repulsed. Katy French was a human being, but even that fundamental dignity was robbed from her over those initial weeks. True, she may have been in the public eye, but to her family and those that knew her, she was just a daughter and friend, who had to suffer such dreadful abuse by those who never knew her outside of the media circus. That is not the aspect I take - no one deserves to die, no one earns a 'told you so'. They can only provide tragic examples and hope that others will learn from their mistakes, even if it is too late for them. I do not judge someone on their private habits - but I do point and say that where he went wrong, the next potential victim can go right and avoid the same pitfalls. I never intended the thread about logic1 to be dragged into another predictable argument regarding drugs and drugs users ala Katy French, I would have been the first to be sickened by negative comments against him as a person - I feel this is where the highpoint of misreading my intentions surfaced. I felt discussion about it should have been allowed, but now that it has been deemed inappropriate, I accept that.

I hope that goes a little way to clarifying my actual intentions - and my most sincerest apologies to friends and family of logic1.

Thank you.

Boston

Oh for the love of god. If you where actually sorry you'd give it a rest and stop trying to vindicate yourself.

6th

Could someone siteban this guy t il he gets over it?

R0ot

Please stop the attention seeking MI

TerrorFirmer

Attention seeking? I want to apologize, and I have done. There's no hidden agenda - I know your blind hatred of me struggles to continue to insult me but that's all I have and that's all I'll give. Whether or not you accept it is up to you, clearly you haven't, but what more can I do other then try.

pvt.joker

You've apologised. End of. Now stop f*cking posting here please.

challengemaster

Ah lads give the guy a break, he's trying to right his wrong. Would be hell of a lot worse if he didn't care about it.

Fair play dude.

Overheal

It seems the community finds you to be in the Doghouse.

R0ot

TerrorFirmer wrote: »

Attention seeking? I want to apologize, and I have done. There's no hidden agenda - I know your blind hatred of me struggles to continue to insult me but that's all I have and that's all I'll give. Whether or not you accept it is up to you, clearly you haven't, but what more can I do other then try.

You apologised in the first thread you created, other than an apology the boards community needed neither another thread stating your apology or a clarification of why you posted what you did in that thread, hence creating this thread is attention seeking as it was not required by anyone else but yourself.

Hagar

Where's all the anger coming from?
TF posted the wrong thing in the wrong place. It has obviously troubled him greatly and has made a very sincere apology.
We seem to able to forgive the dead their mistakes, how about trying it with the living?

pwd

ya people are too quick to gang up on individuals on this site.

311

Decent post from OP ,I know a couple of people who have died before 30 myself.

Some people don't like to talk about it and some do.

Marcus.Aurelius

I'm glad to see an apology, but perhaps a post in Helpdesk would have been better, there's a lot of animosity here in Feedback on the subject.

I think you should leave the apology as is and move along, I can't help but say sorry in some ways for the stick you have and are no doubt about to receive!

r3nu4l

Hagar speaketh the truth! Leave the guy alone. TF, let it go, you've aologised, good stuff.

Overheal

well concerning the hypothermia step-mother I myself let slip a couple Yore Ma jokes to the son for a while afterward - force of habit

Boston

I'm sorry is two words. This is I'm sorry but blah blah blah. TF has made apologies like this before, they're not sincere.

Dudess

How do you know they're not sincere?
They're probably far more well intentioned than constantly keeping an eye on Feedback (and next to no other fora) for opportunities to pounce on people.

TerrorFirmer wrote: »

There's been an awful amount of mis-interpretation regarding my post relating to a certain member of the boards.ie community who passed away last year. True, I posted it in the worst place possible, and for that I am incredibly remorseful and accept that the ban was deserved for sheer insensitivity. I regarded the thread as a commentary thread, forgetting to realize that it was not such a thread but a remembrance one - it was not an intentional effort to blacken an otherwise positive thread and it is incredibly embarrassing for me to have to deal with having done that in the face of so many friends and even family. I feel it's pretty important that I clarify this; I post here enough and I respect the community, even if it appeared otherwise yesterday.

The issue for a lot of people, was not that I posted it in a wholly inappropriate place, but that I was even daring to speak about it - some people seem to believe that you simply can't speak of the dead. Someone actually used 'speak ill of the dead', but that's an unfortunate and totally misleading phrase - nowhere did I attempt to insinuate that the person in question was not the outstanding, general all around friendly character that he was to everyone who knew him. That's the sad underlying message - victims of drugs and substances are not simply faceless individuals of an apparently lower worth that the media and general conditioning would have us believe. They are people like you and me. This whole issue was never about logic as a person, it was never about anyone in particular who takes drugs, or attempting to 'force' a moralistic message - it was simply a sad, and equally jarring warning over the potential dangers of taking up recreational drugs. I bear no ill will towards anyone who takes drugs, in any capacity, I simply believe that the more people are aware of the potential devastation they cause, the better our country and society are for it. There was a complete and utter tendency to regard my comments as personal attacks on the individual in question, which is about as far away from the truth as possible. I only had minor interaction with Logic1, true, only in the most casual of senses, but always found him a good laugh and in particular, we shared a good laugh over the fictional 'Caucasian Boards Beers' two or three years back. I was stunned by his passing as was everyone else, in fact, it actually plagued me for a long period of time, mulling over the tragedy of a such a young, fit man passing before his time. Did the details of his passing alter my opinion of him? Not in the slightest bit. I would even go so far as to say I lost a little sleep over it, and that's the honest truth. It simply made me sad that his life had to end in such an avoidable manner. As someone else said, there were so many other things he could have done with his life, and such an awful turn of events reflects the experiences of many families throughout the country.

Was I personally attacking logic1 in posting the conclusions of his death? Absolutely not, in any capacity. I only hoped that such a sad case that struck a nerve with so many people would present an even greater and further reaching message about the dangers of drugs. Logic was no doubt a great person, and regardless he always will be to those who know him - I would never, ever attempt to change that viewpoint for any reason, but people seem to think that was my intention. It was not. Nothing will change who he was as a person.

When Katy French died, when the young men from Waterford died from ingesting excessive cocaine, boards.ie was rife with wholly inappropriate commentary on both sides of the fence - good versus bad, deserving versus undeserving, and so on - which was generally allowed continue, with some members even going as disgusting far as propagating the law regarding defamation of the death. To say I was disgusted is an understatement, I felt repulsed. Katy French was a human being, but even that fundamental dignity was robbed from her over those initial weeks. True, she may have been in the public eye, but to her family and those that knew her, she was just a daughter and friend, who had to suffer such dreadful abuse by those who never knew her outside of the media circus. That is not the aspect I take - no one deserves to die, no one earns a 'told you so'. They can only provide tragic examples and hope that others will learn from their mistakes, even if it is too late for them. I do not judge someone on their private habits - but I do point and say that where he went wrong, the next potential victim can go right and avoid the same pitfalls. I never intended the thread about logic1 to be dragged into another predictable argument regarding drugs and drugs users ala Katy French, I would have been the first to be sickened by negative comments against him as a person - I feel this is where the highpoint of misreading my intentions surfaced. I felt discussion about it should have been allowed, but now that it has been deemed inappropriate, I accept that.

I hope that goes a little way to clarifying my actual intentions - and my most sincerest apologies to friends and family of logic1.

Thank you.

Fair play TF - that to me looks extremely sincere and heartfelt. What I took from the post in question was simply that you used a platform inappropriately to make a point. But you've realised your mistake and you're obviously extremely sorry.

There's no need for the witch hunt. He clearly feels crap and that's punishment enough.

Cuddlesworth

Who's hunting what now?

Who cares what you posted a year ago, christ nobody cares what your posting now. Un-needed drama.

Bob the Builder

Hagar wrote: »

Where's all the anger coming from?
TF posted the wrong thing in the wrong place. It has obviously troubled him greatly and has made a very sincere apology.
We seem to able to forgive the dead their mistakes, how about trying it with the living?

Whilst i disagree with the OP's actions, He has made an apology, and I think it's in everyone's best interests to accept that - whether sincere or not. There's a lot of sense in what hagar has just said.

A bit of advice I got when two of my two friends died this year;
You will never and can never get over death like this, you can merely come to terms with it. You will hear stuff and see stuff that will make you sick to the bottom of your stomach, but at least you'll know that you're lucky enough to be still alive to hear it. Hating those people only fills you with insecurity, so you might as well accept it as experience, and move on, learning from the mistakes from others.

i still remember what that counsellor said, word for word. and dammit, she was right.
She also said that when you see a RIP message, and you also see the dates of that persons date of birth, and the date of death, but the only dates that really matter are the dates in between.

nesf

Hagar wrote: »

Where's all the anger coming from?
TF posted the wrong thing in the wrong place. It has obviously troubled him greatly and has made a very sincere apology.
We seem to able to forgive the dead their mistakes, how about trying it with the living?

The anger would disappear if he just shut up about this. The only person still starting threads about this whole incident is him.

Dudess

Sometimes though, if guilt is gnawing at you, you're driven to doing something like this. Plus, while he may have apologised, he hadn't really clarified things - not a bad idea to set the record straight. I know I'd hate to be thought of as someone who was having a go at a young person who died tragically, which is what people were thinking, and this post counters that. Sure, there'll be people who'll continue to WANT to think he was having a malicious go at Niall, but **** them - most people realise now he wasn't.

But I agree, time to leave it at that, so might I suggest that this thread be locked?

Sherifu

I hope this will be an end to it and everyone puts it behind them.

Gone West

Terrorfirmer/havok/mobileinfantry/whatever you're having your name changed to after this:

Just let it go, and go away before one of the smods makes you go away.
You're digging deeper into a hole thats harsh on yourself and hurtful to a family.
Theres no point in it all.
Just. Let. It. Go.

thanks.

Talliesin

TerrorFirmer wrote: »

There's been an awful amount of mis-interpretation

No there hasn't.

Why don't you find some other high horse to jump on?

KnifeWRENCH

Oh for the love of God.
He did a tactless insensitive and stupid thing and he's now apologised - there's no need for the constant attacks.

TerrorFirmer feels bad for what he's done and just wants to say he's sorry. You'd swear none of ye had never made a mistake before, or posted something you shouldn't.

Boston I'm amazed you haven't been banned from Feedback due the constant barrage of childish insults you've thrown at him.

Hagar wrote:

Where's all the anger coming from?
TF posted the wrong thing in the wrong place. It has obviously troubled him greatly and has made a very sincere apology.
We seem to able to forgive the dead their mistakes, how about trying it with the living?

Absolutely spot on.

Now someone PLEASE LOCK THIS THREAD.

Bob the Builder

square_igloo wrote: »

Now someone PLEASE LOCK THIS THREAD.

This issue is way too sensitive now, and things are gone beyond a joke. Time to lock it up, throw away the key, and move on, however difficult that may be.

FruitLover

Mate,

You've realized the error of the original post and are at least trying to give an apology, but this has already been done in the other Feedback thread, and at this point I think it would be best if you just dropped it (and especially if you didn't keep trotting out the 'I'm trying to save lives' pony). That would be the quickest way for everyone to forget all about this.

Adam

square_igloo wrote: »

Oh for the love of God.
He did a tactless insensitive and stupid thing and he's now apologised - there's no need for the constant attacks.

TerrorFirmer feels bad for what he's done and just wants to say he's sorry. You'd swear none of ye had never made a mistake before, or posted something you shouldn't.

Boston I'm amazed you haven't been banned from Feedback due the constant barrage of childish insults you've thrown at him.


Absolutely spot on.

Now someone PLEASE LOCK THIS THREAD.

+1

Lock and load baby :cool:

KnifeWRENCH

nevf wrote: »

This issue is way too sensitive now, and things are gone beyond a joke. Time to lock it up, throw away the key, and move on, however difficult that may be.

Ah dammit. Why did you have to quote me when I messed up the size tags?
I agree though - this issue should be forgotten about and everyone just move on.

Trinity

They should be deleted full stop. All threads besides the memorial one.

I'm not taking sides but up until these threads started i had no idea who logic1 was, the name was vaguely familiar, i had no dealings with the guy.

Now i know his name,where he lived, his brothers name and what he 'allegedly' died from. I am sure anyone can come on here and do the same.

I dont think this is how his family will want him remembered.

If they choose to tell his story to put a message across that should be their choosing.

Dudess

TerrorFirmer wrote: »

There's been an awful amount of mis-interpretation

Talliesin wrote: »

No there hasn't.

- Yes there has...

Boston

Dudess wrote: »

- Yes there has...

Dudess, I never thought he was having a dig at Neil. In order for that he would have had to take into consideration someone else's feelings. No I don't think he considered anyones feelings besides his own before he made that post. Yes, I definitely think it showed a complete lack of thought, even the tiny amount required to intentionally insult someone.

Talliesin

Dudess wrote: »

- Yes there has...

Has there? I think most people can see it as callous, ghoulish and pathetic. There were very few posts interpreting it any other way.

Kintarō Hattori

Look we're never all going to agree happily on this matter. What's done is done so why don't we all just move along and leave this matter behind us. If you have an issue with TerrorFirmer bitching about it here isn't going to help you or what's been already done.

Lock the thread, keep our opinions about the OP to ourselves and get on with things.

nesf

Talliesin wrote: »

Has there? I think most people can see it as callous, ghoulish and pathetic. There were very few posts interpreting it any other way.

You forgot "worthy of the deepest contempt" from the list.

Kintarō Hattori

nesf wrote: »

You forgot "worthy of the deepest contempt" from the list.

Give it a rest.

MagicMarker

I find it ironic that if TM were talking about any other randomer on the street then most would probably be giving him the thumps up.

He chose to post the wrong thing in the wrong thread. Big woop!

Chill.

Boston

Thats the entire point, he wasn't talking about some random bloke.

Dudess

For ****'s sake, this is just dancing on a man's grave. I hope to Christ none of his family are reading it.

Steve

Dudess wrote: »

For ****'s sake, this is just dancing on a man's grave. I hope to Christ none of his family are reading it.

I agree - so much for the new feedback mods.

Fair play to TF for the apology but letting this bickering continue is just downright disrespectful.

Trinity

Yes it is.

Both sides have spoken, everyone is raw, emotions are high. OP has apologised, it may not be accepted by some, but whats done is done.

If its not going to be locked or deleted can we at least let it die.

This is achieving nothing but highlighting and airing private and personal information regarding a member of the community on a public forum. There was almost 2000 people on boards last night, i think, a fraction would have seen this, if you keep the thread alive another fraction may see it tonight and so forth.

This is highly inappropriate and to echo Dudess i hope the fcuk his family are not reading this. There doesnt have to be a last word in this, all points are taken, the bigger person will let it go and if there has to be a last word let it be this.

Rest In Peace Logic1.

Kinetic^

Jesus, some saturday night you lot are having. Delete the threads imo. Respect.

nesf

Kintarō Hattori wrote: »

Give it a rest.

I agree.

muffler

The only person thats not dragging this sad issue along any further is TF. One post only in this thread.

It appears that it is others here who are hell bent on not giving it a rest.

Maybe a lot of you should practice what you preach.

Dudess

nesf wrote: »

I agree.

:rolleyes:

SteveC wrote: »

so much for the new feedback mods.

To be fair to them, it's the Saturday night of a bank holiday weekend. Obviously if even one of them were online tonight, something would be done about this.

nesf

Dudess wrote: »

:rolleyes:

I was indicating that he was right and I was taking it too far rather than just staying silent and not having to admit I was wrong. I can see how that was misread.

Dudess

Oh right, sorry.

GuanYin

Apologies and Clarifications are two very different things.

One is centered on other peoples feelings he other is centered on your own feelings.

If you want to apologize, then say sorry, I shouldn't have posted that and leave your feelings out of it.

If you want to defend yourself, done't dress it up to be an apology, it is insulting, in this context it is disrespectful and it just annoys people more and makes you look worse.

Adam

muffler wrote: »

The only person thats not dragging this sad issue along any further is TF. One post only in this thread.

It appears that it is others here who are hell bent on not giving it a rest.

Maybe a lot of you should practice what you preach.

.

AARRRGH

I've read TerrorFirmer's posts over the years on this site, and he seems to be a fairly level headed, honest person.

I don't think he meant anything bad at all. He was simply pointing out the reality of the situation. I don't think it was the right thread to do that, but he's hardly evil or a bastard for doing what he did. Maybe a bit insensitive, but that's hardly a reason to shun him.

Too many people take things way too personally on this site.

He's sorry. He acknowledges he was in the wrong. It's time to accept and move forward.

Dudess

Yep. And sometimes a clarification is simply an explanation to people who might want one - it's not always about someone only taking their own feelings into account. It smacks of cynicism to say that.
TerrorFirmer has never struck me as an unreasonable poster either.