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Night terrors of a 24 yr old

  • 22-07-2008 10:22am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I have had this problem for quite a while and I would like to know what others think, or if they have overcome it?

    I turn 24 this weekend, I have a good life and not a lot of worries. When I go to bed at night I do be lying there,trying to sleep, and I hear noises. It could be a click, a bang, or movement, and my body goes rigid with fear. My heart starts beating faster and faster and I lie there rigid in the bed, unable to move, temples throbbing and heart beating faster, until I eventually fall asleep. I think it’s the fear of someone trying to break in, yet everything’s locked up. When my boyfriend and I moved in together early this year, he would jump up with me, I would be soaked with sweat at that stage and could not even touch him or wake him.

    This may all sound like I’m a bit messed up! But, very honestly, I’m a normal happy girl, I’ll admit, I have notice I get anxious, but you learn a bit about yourself as you go forward. My friend thinks its anxiety, but surely, I don’t know, I try my best to block out the sounds but then I hear one bang, etc.. and my heart begins to beat faster and faster, and it hurts! Your lying there, so afraid you can’t move sweating and shaking… it’s a messy state to get the body into.

    The question is, does anyone know what the appropriate route of action is? Some people might say a counsellor, but is there a sleep specialist? I don’t know what I’m picking at, but we’re all human here, maybe someone else is experiencing this fear at night?

    One thing I think bothers me when he falls asleep straight away is his snoring – how is he going to hear any trouble if it starts? But I’ve had this a very long time now, I did it all through my childhood, and now here I am, about to turn 24 and I’m a quivering mess come night time. I don’t know.. I just really tried my best last night, but the only way I got asleep was by pulling the duvet sheet as close to my ears as I could get it.

    I would love to hear if anyone else gets as frightened as I do at night.

    On another (far out) note, I consulted a psychic last year and she believed I was psychic and hearing ‘things’ at night, but I didn’t want to go down that route in case I opened a jar of worms.


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Comments

  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,362 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    I consulted a psychic last year and she believed I was psychic and hearing ‘things’ at night, but I didn’t want to go down that route in case I opened a jar of worms.

    Psychics (read bunch of chancers) who prey on the weak should be put up against a wall and shot.
    I have no time for them and more to the point, I consider that sort of carry on to be nothing more than a bunch of crackpots.

    The fact that you even consider these kind of people as a sorce is part of your problem. You must be susceptible and it's time to see the difference between what is real and what is not.
    You're letting your imagination get the better of you, if you hear a noise, that's all it is, a noise.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,371 ✭✭✭✭Zillah


    You're not suffering night terrors, you're experiencing frequent sleep paralysis by the sounds of it. There are many potential causes, stress and irregular sleeping patterns being the main ones. It usually kicks in when waking but it can happen while one is falling asleep.

    You could probably help get rid of it by dealing with your anxiety issues. If you have a strong irrational fear of someone breaking in I think thats an issue you should probably explore for its own sake, maybe speak with a counsellor. Is there anything in your past that would cause such a strong fear?

    If speaking to a counsellor sounds like a bit much you could probably help yourself by taking a mild sedative, maybe doing a security ritual around the house before you sleep making sure everything is locked up tight.

    Also, don't sleep on your back, for some reason that position is conducive to sleep paralysis, sleep on your side if you can. Don't go down the psychic route, those people are professionals in nothing but nonesense. See your GP if you want to consult an authority.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 139 ✭✭newname


    I used to get them after heavy weekends drinking, always on a monday or tuesday night, unable to move and trying to shout but can't and have to sort of wriggle out of it. My heart would be beating like mad - really horrible. Haven't had them in years now tho.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Thanks Zillah, but I dont think its sleep paralysis, I followed the link.

    A bit of background - my house was never broken into ever, throughout my life, Im trying to explain this as best I can, but its a fear I probably should see a counsellor over, to help overcome it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,371 ✭✭✭✭Zillah


    Beruthiel wrote: »
    You're letting your imagination get the better of you, if you hear a noise, that's all it is, a noise.

    Also, to be fair this may not be the case. If she is suffering sleep paralysis (which she almost definately is) she may actually be hearing noises. In the most literal sense her imagination is getting the better of her: the brain can generate dream elements while you are still largely concious, one can see and hear things that are created within the brain.

    And no, as amazing as this sounds, its a real phenomenon thats well documented, I've also experienced it myself twice. Luckily for me I had previously read about it so I wasn't scared.


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  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Politics Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators, Regional East Moderators Posts: 12,110 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dizzyblonde


    Zillah wrote: »
    If she is suffering sleep paralysis (which she almost definately is)

    I'm not so sure - she said she hears a noise and then goes rigid with fear. Sleep paralysis is an inability to move and that's different.This doesn't sound like sleep paralysis, it sounds more like anxiety.
    OP if I were you I'd have a chat with your GP about this.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,496 ✭✭✭Mr. Presentable


    My sister went through that at about your age. The solution for her:

    No alcohol or tea or coffee in the evening.
    Sleep with the light on, even a side light will have the effect of reassuring you (your bf can wear a mask)
    Mentally run through the story of a favourite book.

    Some or all of this may help you. Good luck, and remember, it's all in your own mind so you are master of it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    nipplenuts wrote: »
    My sister went through that at about your age. The solution for her:

    No alcohol or tea or coffee in the evening.
    Sleep with the light on, even a side light will have the effect of reassuring you (your bf can wear a mask)
    Mentally run through the story of a favourite book.

    Some or all of this may help you. Good luck, and remember, it's all in your own mind so you are master of it.
    Well at least now I know that someone else has gone through this at my age, thanks nipplenuts.

    Dizzyblonde, I am planning to go talk to the GP but Im afraid of being prescribed medication, and not being taken seriously, and coming across like a loo-laah.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,371 ✭✭✭✭Zillah


    Sleep paralysis is an inability to move and that's different.This doesn't sound like sleep paralysis, it sounds more like anxiety.

    She said "I lie there rigid in the bed, unable to move, temples throbbing and heart beating faster, until I eventually fall asleep."

    1 - Sleep paralysis is way more complex that simply not being able to move. It can be a full blown waking nightmare of any intensity, from outright alien abductions to a more minor episode, like the original poster describes.

    2 - Night terrors is a different but also very intense sleep abberation, the fact that she would use this to describe it would tell me its more than a simple "too scared to move" situation.

    3 - If her heart is pumping and her temples throbbing do you think she's be able to fall asleep unless something else was going on? With sleep paralysis the body would have already entered a different state of conciousness. If it was a mere case of panicing I can't imagine she'd just fall asleep after a while.

    But the original poster could clear this up herself: When you say you can't move, do you mean it literally?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 220 ✭✭amy85


    ya this doesnt really sound like sleep paralysis as i get this a lot of the time and its completely different.. i usually get it more often when im stressed out over different things.. its the scariest thing ever.. i wud hallucinate that there wud be someone in the room with me trying to hurt me or that,and i wud be paralysied to the bed with fear,not able to scream or shout for help..nothing..then after a few seconds i would wake up out of it in a complete state..sometimes i would get it so regular i would be nearly afraid going to bed at night by myself for fear of it happening again!!.... neways nightterrors,just to let u no,ur not the only one who gets stuff like this and its definetly not uncommon..go to ur doc,tell her bout it,she mite refer you on to a sleep specialist or sumething...get to the bottom of it.!! good luck with it ok..in the meantime try not drink to much tea/coffee before bed,try sleep on ur side or front,not on your back as this seems to make it happen more easily i think,and definetly refrain from watching scary films etc before bed if possible!! :)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Zillah wrote: »
    But the original poster could clear this up herself: When you say you can't move, do you mean it literally?

    Yes, pretty much what happens is, I hear something, I try to brush it off, tell myself its nothing but my hearing becomes intensified X 1000 and I almost hear everything then. When I'm frightened, when the heart is going ninety, I can't move for at least 15 minutes, I am literally rigid with fear. If I move, my heart beats faster and my eyes are wide with fear. I feel like such an idiot trying to explain this! Argh!

    When the episode is over and I begin to fall asleep, I can move again. My body is sore from the tension, and Im exhausted the following morning when I wake up.


    Another thing I might add is that I have the most amazingly lucid dreams, I record them, and I love going to sleep at night, my dreams are fantastic. Im also very good at the piano, I write alot, Ive been playing since I was 5..maybe a part of my brain developed more with all the writing, I dont know, just throwing things out there to help.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,380 ✭✭✭chuckles30


    OP - I went through months of this after there was a break in our house one night. I couldn't believe that I hadn't heard anything when it happened. Afterwards I became extremely conscious of every 'noise' that happens in a house at night and I'd be lying there just like you, sweating, heart pounding etc.
    I eventually just worked through it myself, but it did take time. Here are some things that worked for me: relax before you go to bed and be careful about what you watch on tv late at night.....no crime based programmes. Read a book.....some chick-lit is ideal as you can think about their 'problems' when you turn off the light. Then I used to leave on the radio on the sleep function, as that blocked out the other noises.
    And most importantly, if you do hear a noise, you just have to tell yourself that it is just that, a creak or click and nothing to worry about. Just take a couple of deep breaths.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Amy - thank you so much! x


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 71 ✭✭Wotzit


    I could have written this post myself. I lie in bed, trying to sleep, hear one noise (and I KNOW it's nothing) and just go rigid with fright. Then the sweating starts. weekends are the worst. I say in my head constantly 'it's nothing, go to sleep' but I just can't relax. It's like I have two people in my head, one is saying 'it's a rapist, a murderer, run for your life' - btw I know how silly that sounds - and the other is saying 'stop with the drama'

    Like the OP I've never experienced a break in at my house, I live in a very safe estate and I always make sure the house is locked up tight. But will this fear go away??? hell no!!! irrational fear - it's the pits.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,371 ✭✭✭✭Zillah


    How strange, I had no idea so many people experienced this much fear at night.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,181 ✭✭✭LouOB


    What is happening to you sounds like myself

    BF is lying next to me I am waiting until he starts snoring
    And therfore i cannot relax

    Try afew early nights in the spare bedroom with earplugs
    After long hot bath - you will be counting the zzzzzz's in no time
    Its sounds like sleep depravation than anything else - you might be making things worse in your own head.


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Politics Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators, Regional East Moderators Posts: 12,110 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dizzyblonde


    Dizzyblonde, I am planning to go talk to the GP but Im afraid of being prescribed medication, and not being taken seriously, and coming across like a loo-laah.

    Don't worry, I doubt your GP would prescribe medication unless it was really bad and other things didn't work.
    The trouble with a problem like this is that the more you stress about it the more it happens so you need to break the cycle. You could try relaxation/meditation for a start - there are good cd's you can get.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 23,718 ✭✭✭✭JonathanAnon


    have you tried listening to audio books or something, or late night talk shows.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    No johnathon, I did listen to a hypnotist's cd for quitting smoking though and that got me off to sleep.


    Im going to try, reading in bed, listening to radio /music... relaxation and other suggestions you guys have offered.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,636 ✭✭✭✭fits


    Well I've been broken into loads of times (sometimes while i was in the house) and I sleep like a baby these days. The reason being that I know if someone were to break in, either the alarm or the dogs would go off. Could you get an alarm installed? (I dont recommend getting a dog unless you've thought it through). Is the house secure?


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    nightterrors11 have you considered getting a dream catcher ?

    I agree and disagree with Beruthiel.

    I don't think they are all crackpots but I do think that who ever you dealt with was wrong in how they treated you.

    I would suggest that you look at changing your diet, changing your room around, look at all the factors that effect you physically, your routine, how much exercise you get, go the dr and if and when you have exhausted all the practical options only then contact Irish Spiritual Centre 30 -31 Wicklow Street
    Dublin 2.

    http://www.irish-spiritual-centre.org/Default.htm


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,371 ✭✭✭✭Zillah


    I feel like such an idiot trying to explain this! Argh!

    Don't worry, this sort of stuff is always difficult to explain.
    Yes, pretty much what happens is, I hear something, I try to brush it off, tell myself its nothing but my hearing becomes intensified X 1000 and I almost hear everything then. When I'm frightened, when the heart is going ninety, I can't move for at least 15 minutes, I am literally rigid with fear. If I move, my heart beats faster and my eyes are wide with fear.

    When the episode is over and I begin to fall asleep, I can move again. My body is sore from the tension, and Im exhausted the following morning when I wake up.

    I'm still not quite clear though, is it that you're too scared to move or is it that your body seems to be physically paralysed, like you couldn't move even if you tried?

    Either way, whether its sleep paralysis, anxiety attacks or just plain old regular fear, relaxing and reassuring yourself sounds like a good plan either way.

    I'd reccomend getting a motion sensor alarm system. Sounds high tech but they're actually really easy to set up. Put one in every room but your bedroom and you can be guaranteed 100% that if anything moves in the house an alarm will start screaming, so you can be sure that if the alarm isn't going off then the house is secure.
    Another thing I might add is that I have the most amazingly lucid dreams

    Thats actually kind of interesting, my sleep paralysis experience happened when I was learning lucid dreaming a couple years ago.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Cringe... I lived with my parents and they had an alarm, and I still was like this.

    Heres the thing, you can move, but you just can't, because, the fear takes over. Your simply too afraid to move.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,168 ✭✭✭Kazobel


    Hi OP, it is sleep paralysis, normally what should happen is we fall asleep and 90 minutes later we go into REM sleep and start dreaming, our body releases melanin which paralysis us (so we don't act out our dreams) and induces a dream state. Sleep paralysis is a form of narcolepsy, melanin is released to soon so we're half awake, half asleep and concious dreaming but the dreams are dictated by you. If you're anxious then that's what will come across in you're half dream. Medication wouldn't help, it's one of those things where you have to learn to control it.

    Firstly stop sleeping on your back (for some reason lying on your back increases the chances of it happening), secondly when you hear the noise it's already to late so instead of panicing calm yourself down, realise the fact that you are concious and what you see is what you're imagining so think happy thoughts instead <-- it sounds silly I know but your waking dreams are a product of what's going on in your head and the fact that you're conciously dreaming means if you try you can control what you see, it'll take a while before it goes away but in between you don't have to only see horrible stuff.

    When you hear the noise you know it's going to happen but don't dread it or fight it, let it happen but be aware that you're concious of it, you're still awake, you're just dreaming awake so think of something nice to dream about, I found unicorns and teddybears helped me :o (Ironically now that's most likely what you'll think about next time :p )


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 21,730 ✭✭✭✭entropi


    Zillah wrote: »
    Also, to be fair this may not be the case. If she is suffering sleep paralysis (which she almost definately is) she may actually be hearing noises.
    The documented triggers are sound and touch, and the OP can actually move once they wake, which would twist the diagnosis away from sleep paralysis and into something else.
    And no, as amazing as this sounds, its a real phenomenon thats well documented, I've also experienced it myself twice. Luckily for me I had previously read about it so I wasn't scared.
    I have had this at minimum of 6 times and each time was as scary as the last, yet i managed to find a solution to make it stop altogether. And i mostly experienced it from sleeping on my stomach.

    As for the OP herself, alot of psychics do prey on stories like this, i would recommend not visiting them again and maybe see a counsellor or see if you can get advice from the HSE or have them refer you to someone qualified to talk about such things.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,371 ✭✭✭✭Zillah


    The documented triggers are sound and touch

    No, they're not. There's no distinct triggers. It can happen for no apparent reason whatsoever. I don't know where you might have gotten this.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,226 ✭✭✭taram


    I suffer from a similar problem OP, I'm 22, had it bad at 18, only started getting the episodes again in the last year. Stress I think played a factor for me. Never had break in or anything particularly traumatic happen to me.

    Try get your bf more involved in helping you? During a particularly bad week my bf stayed up with me until I fell asleep, telling me random stories about going to tesco :D If we could hear a tree tapping on a window something dramatic would happen in his story to distract me. I've also done breathing exercises (effective if only jumpy, not if fullly terrified), and had a lucky Russian doll to protect me (silly, but effective), she's on my desk so the first thing I see when I open my eyes is her. Hot baths, lavender oil on your pillow, hot milk before sleep etc, all these help too. Good luck.


  • Registered Users Posts: 227 ✭✭Fly High


    I would also be of the thought that this is not sleep paralysis, being too afraid to move though you physically can is not being paralysised... With sleep paralysis you can't move your muscles no matter how hard or long you try so I would rule that out in this case...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    From what the OP has said I don't think it is sleep paralysis as she appears to be awake in the first place ( sleep paralysis only happens when you are first asleep and then wake up unable to move due to the hormones released during REM sleep not fully having worn off yet, bloody terrifying when you are trapped in your own body ) What the OP descibes doesn't match up to that, she describes lying awake hearing a noise and then being paralyised with fearm, this is much more akin to a panic attack i.e. the fear inducing the paralysis rather than sleep paralysis which is paralysis causing the fear.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,371 ✭✭✭✭Zillah


    sleep paralysis only happens when you are first asleep

    No it doesn't, sleep paralysis can happen as you are falling asleep. People really need to stop spouting misinformation about Sleep Paralysis.


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