What's the most idiotic drunk text message you ever sent?

dee8839

Mine was probably the regular old "trick" I used at 17 - sending a blank text to the guy I liked in the hope of "accidentally" striking up a conversation... I was sure at the time that it was as subtle as it got. I was so thick...

Or there was the charming one I sent to a friend:

"Wher d fuvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvk dya gpp, bigg frkn gby"

I think I was upset...

Steve_o

I asked ex to come down to the pub to marry me one night in very broken drunken english... it was a humurous situation i though... I had a jelly ring for her and everything!!!

Flashraziel

The night before Slane 2004 I was camping nearby and got very drunk. I texted my mam and asked her to text me a clean pair of trousers.
The spelling and grammar were impeccable though.

Steve_o

Flashraziel wrote: »

The night before Slane 2004 I was camping nearby and got very drunk. I texted my mam and asked her to text me a clean pair of trousers.
The spelling and grammar were impeccable though.

Did she?

Delirium

Sent 'I am the human animal' to a friend one night after a few too many.:D

anonymous_joe

Told my ex I loved her, and that I was having a great time without her, but that the girl I had just f*cked meant absolutely nothing to me. Went down very well.

This being all of a month after we broke up. :P

Flashraziel

Steve_o wrote: »

Did she?

She did not. I ended up wearing a tux to Slane that year and doing Meatloaf impressions for apple schnapps.

L1011

More cases of sending texts to the wrong people - too many dave/davids, gar/garys, johns, etc.

Have ended up with some VERY dodgy texts going to the wrong people before...

Got sent a relationship-style "We need to talk" by a mate once when he was drunk. He to this day can't remember what it was we needed to talk about so urgently - considering I was out of the country at the time!

Steve_o

Flashraziel wrote: »

She did not. I ended up wearing a tux to Slane that year and doing Meatloaf impressions for apple schnapps.

lol, sounds like an interesting experience!!

chickenhawk

A friend of mine (a guy) wanted to text another friend of mine to ask her out. I was drunk and accidentally sent him the next number down on my phone rather than the girls no.

The next number down was my aunt.

And no him and my aunt did not go out on a date!!

elmyra

MYOB wrote: »

More cases of sending texts to the wrong people - too many dave/davids, gar/garys, johns, etc.

I'm ridiculous for that! In particular, I just can't become friends with any more Johns or Eoins.

Worst was probably texting my bra size to my male friend instead of my Mum who was buying stock at the time. Wasn't even drunken, just stupid!

Flashraziel

elmyra wrote: »

I'm ridiculous for that! In particular, I just can't become friends with any more Johns or Eoins.

Worst was probably texting my bra size to my male friend instead of my Mum who was buying stock at the time. Wasn't even drunken, just stupid!

What did he say about it?

Sherifu

I txt the wrong person once. Worst feeling when you realise it. Time to make up a good story at that point. Hasn't happened since thankfully.

elmyra

Flashraziel wrote: »

What did he say about it?

Me: "I'm a [insert bra size]"

Him: "Well that was direct. Where should I meet you?"

Aurora Borealis

God my life was a serious of idiotic texts there for a while. Some sent intentionally and a few by mistake too. I am like a demon sometimes with a phone in my hand, well was with one certain individual. Poor sod!

Life's much simpler if you just talk to the person I find. Texts are the mother of all misunderstandings!!

Beerlao

i sent my mum a message by mistake saying "i can't wait to get home and f*ck your brains out"

if you're going out with a girl who's name begins with N or M, pay close attention when you're texting!

jigglywoo

It's worse when you're ranting about someone and accidentally send the text to the person you were ranting about

Kold

When I was 16 I accidentally sent a text saying "She's alright lookin but seems a bit of a mentalist, don't think I really want to be going out with her" to the girl I was talking about.


Jeez, with the drought as it is I wouldn't mind a mentalist now.

taidghbaby

once after a long day on the sauce i texted three women i had recently been seeing were they out and like to meet etc, giving details where i was....thinking that i had a 33% chance with each, so i might get one!!

only problem was two of them text me back telling me they were on the way!!

Auldloon

Woken up by "I miss you" from a workmate recently v late on saturday night(were both male).
Replied Ah thats nice, sure you will get to see me on monday:D

AckwelFoley

i was drunk..

sittin on the toilet.. in the girlfriends apt

sent a txt to the then girlfriend "im going to stick my cock in your ear"

Realised the next morning when i got a reply.. that it was my sister i sent it to.

Her answer was simple..

"not tonight, im busy - maybe tomorrow."

tuxy

jigglywoo wrote: »

It's worse when you're ranting about someone and accidentally send the text to the person you were ranting about

I know how to stop this from happening. Stop being two faced.

mumhaabu

Sent a text to a girl a few yars back whom I was mad after while rather inebriated saying "you have great child bearing hips" not the best chatup line! :pac: However it went to my rather prudish (hotish MILF) Female boss; however even though she was a prude she decided that the best punishement for me was public humiliation and showed it to everyone I work with. I still call her "sexy hips" whenever I meet her, mind you I'm higher ranking than her now within the company lol! I know a guy who sent a message after the xmas office party to a former managing director and received the P45 upon January's arrival. :eek:

giggii

i once sent a very provocative text(complete with picture) to my mother-her number was one number different to that of my boyfriend at the time. there were a few rather awkward days afterwards...

chickenhawk

giggii wrote: »

i once sent a very provocative text(complete with picture) to my mother-her number was one number different to that of my boyfriend at the time. there were a few rather awkward days afterwards...

Why? Was she turned on and kept hitting on you?

jigglywoo

tuxy wrote: »

I know how to stop this from happening. Stop being two faced.

never!

giggii

chickenhawk wrote: »

Why? Was she turned on and kept hitting on you?

eeww!

orestes

Snyper, what's your sisters number? :cool:

fitz0

jigglywoo wrote: »

It's worse when you're ranting about someone and accidentally send the text to the person you were ranting about

Zzippy

snyper wrote: »

i was drunk..

sittin on the toilet.. in the girlfriends apt

sent a txt to the then girlfriend "im going to stick my cock in your ear"

Realised the next morning when i got a reply.. that it was my sister i sent it to.

Her answer was simple..

"not tonight, im busy - maybe tomorrow."

Where can I meet your sister?

Edit: Damn you Orestes! Beaten to it...

Turd Ferguson

I accidently sent a txt to my granny that was meant for a girl I was seeing saying "My place for a fcuk tonight?"

Needless to say my granny turned up half an hour later wearing knee pads and with a tub of vasaline....best night of my LIFE!!!!

AckwelFoley

Zzippy wrote: »

Where can I meet your sister?

She being treated in the "eye and ear" hospital in Dublin.

Bring grapes and 7 up.

L1011

elmyra wrote: »

I'm ridiculous for that! In particular, I just can't become friends with any more Johns or Eoins.

My rule is I'm not allowed go out with someone who has the same name as any of my mates any more... writing off half the availables in one fell stroke there probably!

Mimikyu

This post has been deleted.

PeakOutput

about a year ago i told an ex i still thought about here all the time which was a drunken horny lie that probably caused alot more pain then was necessary for everyone involved

edit; actually there was a much recent one that was way worse. i was asking an old friend an opinion on a so called 'casual' relationship i was having about 4/5 months ago while i was at work. their opinion was that the girl was getting more attached then she should be for a casual relationship so i replied 'well thats the end of that then but i better wait till next week so i dont mess up the ball for her' of course i sent it to the girl and not my friend.

i was stone cold sober at the time aswell and damn sagem phones dont have a cancel button after you hit send so all i could do was watch it complete its sending and awake the hysterical phone call which took about 30seconds and then my battery died.....twas a fun night

truecrippler

Accidentally broke up with a girl I was seeing a few months ago. I hadn't seen her in two days. Was pizzled one night and was texting stuff like:

"I have seen you in ages, why do you avoid me"

Then another

"I've just thought about it, its over, dont want to see you again"

Was waiting at me phone for 2 weeks for a reply. She sent me a drunk one along the same lines as mine.

Had to go out and meet her in town to fix it up lol.

jellie

I shouldnt be allowed near phones when im drunk. keep ending up in stupid drunken text conversations with my ex. on monday i decided it HAD to stop & told him we couldnt be friends, no contact etc etc. then last night i get drunk & text him i love him - cant even f*cking remember doing it. then theres a text an hr or 2 later which is just jumbles of letters, i think its SUPPOSED to tell him hes an a**hole & i hate him & to just leave me alone but i actually have no idea.

have done the sending messages to the wrong people thing sober. once sent a msg to the ex (bf at the time) that was meant for my friend giving out about him. oops.

phones + alcohol = BAD

Adam

PeakOutput wrote: »

about a year ago i told an ex i still thought about here all the time which was a drunken horny lie that probably caused alot more pain then was necessary for everyone involved

edit; actually there was a much recent one that was way worse. i was asking an old friend an opinion on a so called 'casual' relationship i was having about 4/5 months ago while i was at work. their opinion was that the girl was getting more attached then she should be for a casual relationship so i replied 'well thats the end of that then but i better wait till next week so i dont mess up the ball for her' of course i sent it to the girl and not my friend.

i was stone cold sober at the time aswell and damn sagem phones dont have a cancel button after you hit send so all i could do was watch it complete its sending and awake the hysterical phone call which took about 30seconds and then my battery died.....twas a fun night

Nearly did this once, but I was quick thinking enough to TEAR the battery out of the phone before it sent!

Diarmsquid

I was meant to send this to a friend.

<<This is Ms. X's number: 086XXXXXXX. Text her this message "hey it's sorcha. i told ya i lost my old phone right? so what was that secret you wanted to tell me?" I'll explain later...>>

Straight to Ms X of course.

Krsnik87

I had a good rant one night, send everyone in my phonebook a big **** you message. Woke up but didn't remember sending it, when I went out to the lads everyone was in tears laughing, I asked what was going on, they had sent the messege to everyone on there MSN's, phones etc. Damn message got everywhere.

They still have a copy saved and are always threatening to send it out again. I can only pray it doesn't make its rounds again lol...

Vertakill

Had recently left a job where I got on fairly well with my workmates, who were mostly Polish.
One of the girls texted while she was in work (and obviously had very little to do) on a Saturday morning, inviting us to her going away party.

This text was at about 7am and woke up a very groggy and disgruntled me.
Later that day I sent a text to my mate, who also worked in the same place, saying:

"Jesus, X woke me up at 7am about some going away party. Whats goin on.. she gettin deported or somethin?".
Needless to say I sent this text to her... and received a reply:

"Wear your goddamn contact lens' when your sending txts!!".

Ahh, we had a bit of a laugh because thankfully she had a sense of humour. That and there was always a bit of banter between us all, and no I'm not a racist - it was just a joke in bad taste. :P

Good times!

PeakOutput

whats up vertakill long time no see pretty sure you told me that story while we were ****ing with nerds in work one time

david_the_great

mine has to be a holiday rtext i sent once-

i was very drunk and had to make myself sick

my friend sent-

how you getting on? x x

i sent back--

i am gotin grand- had to make de one sikto dk ur... hagail haklaklaklakla javgg b hood uime

that hagail part and haklak etc was supposed to be hahahahaha

needless to say i never got a reply

david_the_great

jigglywoo wrote: »

It's worse when you're ranting about someone and accidentally send the text to the person you were ranting about

yeah this is the worst- i was having an argument with someone i lived with and then text my friend saying- the bitch wont let m get a word in -and it got a bit heavier-

somehow i managed to turn it round and told her it was meant for her and that i was telling her what i thought of her!

Tar.Aldarion

Sent a lot of people the code to jurys inn bathroom for some reason, that and the occasional text about feelings.

dsmythy

dfnogu fspfidjosriq sfj sf psdgjoirhg sd sop

Now i don't remember the exact letters but it looked something like that.