Using a prostitute

LegacyUser

I am in my late 20's. I have never kissed a girl. While other posters here in lheir late teens & early 20's talk about their woes being a virgin, I have never even kissed a girl!

This is too old to have absolutely 0 sexual experience. Thats why I am thinking of using a prostitute, Not for sex. Just for kissing. But I have doubts about how right it is . Unfortunately, it seems I have morals. If I was to use one, I would choose somebody in their 30's from somewhere like England so that there is a good chance they are in the sex trade because of their own choice. But I am so torn... I dont think it is right. But then again, is it right that I have missed out on so much?

Sherifu

Hmmmm. I'm gonna say don't do it. Try to find a nice girl instead.

pvt.joker

ah for f*ck sake lad. You dont want your first kiss to be with a whore


You ever been to Copper Face Jacks?

Talliesin

So you'll change from being someone who hasn't kissed anyone to someone who has only kissed a prostitute.

What is this meant to do?

dr.bollocko

I think you are confusing your desperation for physical affection with your genuine need for female approval and someone to share with. While a considerate callgirl might help you out for an hour, the root need and cause of your desperation will never be fulfilled by a woman you have paid to give you that affection you desire, regardless of whether it's sex or kissing.

If you do proceed with a prostitute, try and keep it emotionally detached so that you don't confuse your physical needs with emotional ones. Even if it is a one-off it could have a knock-on effect with women you see in the future.
Keep your wits about you and don't fall in love too easy because right now you are emotionally vulnerable is all I'm saying.

Dude, go out and flirt with every girl all night and you'll get a girl to kiss you. U may come across desperate but itd be monkey off your back. Jesus u could even use it as a line FFS. Its not rocket science. Jesus, why oh why would u want to KISS a hooker? Think about that from a hygiene perspective alone, feck thats disgusting!

Dathai

Just out of curiosity, is there any particular reason why you haven't "gotten any" (as it were), or haven't had the chance to be with a woman? Is it a confidence issue? Surely if you're in your late 20's you've had lots of chances.. I assume your friends have kissed girls, and done more..

But regarding the prostitue route - I wouldn't do it. You put yourself at risk of STDs, STIs and more than likely emotional consequences due to having your first sexual experience with a prostitute.

Have you tried going out with friends to the pub, clubs, and trying to flirt / chat up women?
I know it seems daunting, and is very difficult for some people to do, but if I was in your position I'd go down that route before I ever got a prostitute.

Caoimhín

Dont mind the kissing. If you pay good money, go straight for the good stuff. Loads of time for kissing.

It may be a good boast too. That you had sex before you even kissed a girl.

Karen_*

And the vast majority of them don't kiss, OP.

Is there any reason why you haven't kissed a girl? Are you very shy or feel intimidated by women? Because I've said this once and I'll say it again, don't measure yourself on what everyone else is doing. I know a few guys who never had a girlfriend until in their thirties and are now happily married.

A prositute isn't a good idea because you won't feel any better about yourself and it won't solve your problem or how you're feeling. Don't pay someone to kiss you. I'm sure you don't need to.

Can you elaborate a bit as to why you think you haven't had a snog?

pvt.joker

Deleted User wrote: »

Think about that from a hygiene perspective alone, feck thats disgusting!

Jesus I didn't think of that. Sick!:eek::eek::eek:

dr.bollocko

Dathai wrote: »

Just out of curiosity, is there any particular reason why you haven't "gotten any" (as it were), or haven't had the chance to be with a woman? Is it a confidence issue? Surely if you're in your late 20's you've had lots of chances.. I assume your friends have kissed girls, and done more..

There could be a million reasons I can think of off of the top of my head.

Dathai wrote:

But regarding the prostitue route - I wouldn't do it. You put yourself at risk of STDs, STIs and more than likely emotional consequences due to having your first sexual experience with a prostitute.

If you are having sex with anyone there is always a risk of these things. Dont assume that its a greater risk just because it's with a hooker. You dont know the history of any of your sexual partners and unless you demand a test before you do have sex, you will never know.

johnnyq

Op wrote:

But I have doubts about how right it is . Unfortunately, it seems I have morals.
But I am so torn... I dont think it is right. But then again, is it right that I have missed out on so much?

You don't think that using a prostitute is right. I think you've answered your own question here. Tbh, I think it's something you would regret.

So about 'missing out' and how to help that.
If you're into the pub scene then keep trying!
Otherwise, internet dating is very popular amongst the 30's age group so that would be an option too.
Again other options - weddings, social occasions, misiltoe/spin the bottle at staff christmas party etc...

When you do meet your life partner would you tell them that your first kiss was with a prostitute? If it is something you're going to be ashamed of don't do it.

MIN2511

Whats wrong with sleeping with a prostitute?

Dathai

dr.bollocko wrote: »

There could be a million reasons I can think of off of the top of my head..

Yes, that'd be why I'm asking him. Everyone has their reasons..

Karen_*

MIN2511 wrote: »

Whats wrong with sleeping with a prostitute?

Nothing at all. Its a personal choice. But I don't think it would be a good idea for that to be the OPs fisrt experience of sex or kissing.

Caoimhín

I sort of wish my Da had brought me to a prostitute when i was 12 or 13. It would have gotten rid of a lot of stress about getting laid for the following 4 years.

Monkey61

Definitely must tell us why you haven't kissed anyone OP. That's either a chronic lack of confidence or a hell of a lot of social scene avoiding.

Anyone can kiss anyone, it's really true - no matter how much you think you can't.

How do you get on with girls in general? Do you have female friends?

It would definitely be worth while just going out to a complete meat market and hitting on everyone - it may not be pretty, but once you break past that mental block it will get a lot easier. (Coppers coppers coppers!)Much better idea than a prostitute too. I shudder at the thought.

It would also be a fantastic line to use on all your prospective ladies!!

LegacyUser

Monkey61 wrote: »

Definitely must tell us why you haven't kissed anyone OP. That's either a chronic lack of confidence or a hell of a lot of social scene avoiding.

Anyone can kiss anyone, it's really true - no matter how much you think you can't.

How do you get on with girls in general? Do you have female friends?

It would definitely be worth while just going out to a complete meat market and hitting on everyone - it may not be pretty, but once you break past that mental block it will get a lot easier. (Coppers coppers coppers!)Much better idea than a prostitute too. I shudder at the thought.

It would also be a fantastic line to use on all your prospective ladies!!

i love coppers and the thought of you comparing it to a whore house just isnt really on to be honest! i have great nights there, mind you i wouldnt bring a hand bag out of there cause all the guys are after one thing in there and thats what gives the place its reputation!!

Op it will happen when it is meant to happen! dont you be getting worried about it! Make sure its for all the right reasons and make sure you make it a kiss to remember!!

Good luck to you!

lee1234

Monkey61 wrote: »

Definitely must tell us why you haven't kissed anyone OP.
Anyone can kiss anyone, it's really true - no matter how much you think you can't.

It would definitely be worth while just going out to a complete meat market and hitting on everyone - it may not be pretty, but once you break past that mental block it will get a lot easier.

God if it were only that simple

I think late 20's is long enough to wait. Prostitute is not ideal but its progress, and by way of confidence it may help you to get closer to engaging with the meat market method monkey61 is so fond of.

Refresh

as part of your problem is that you have little confidence with women, how do you think that you have the ability to ring a prostitute and visit her at her place or have her visit you at your place?

to me, that is a far bigger issue or at least a far scarier and more intimidating thing to do that to go out to a night club and start talking to random women about any topic under the sun and kiss them when the time comes.

Overheal

Dr. Bollocko is right here I think. Going to a prostitute is only going to satisfy a temporary physical need. Kissing is all well and fine but its only a prelude to the actual emotional gratification of the whole experience; I don't see how you are going to get that from hiring a hooker.

You have to keep the outlook that it will happen when it happen. If you stop worrying about it, it stops being a problem; you'll no longer come of as desperate, and then one day it will just happen.

I don't imagine you will be any more confident after a prostitution experience; in fact I think at the end of the day you will only feel worse about yourself

Rb

MIN2511 wrote: »

Whats wrong with sleeping with a prostitute?

Nothing really, it's just a sign of a man at the very bottom of the pit of desperation.

itchy&scratchy

Rb wrote: »

Nothing really, it's just a sign of a man at the very bottom of the pit of desperation.

you have obvioubsly never seen the ones in amsterdam so...................................:eek: hot hot hot

Bottle_of_Smoke

itchy&scratchy wrote: »

you have obvioubsly never seen the ones in amsterdam so...................................:eek: hot hot hot

This is true. I'm eternally glad I ran out of money by the time I thought it might be a good idea.

OP, I'd see this as a no-brainer, a prostitute will just make you feel weird. Every kiss seems really different the first few times so it won't even be preparing you for anything.

Maybe try online dating, if you're not meeting success with current methods I'd see this as much better plan B

Best of luck.

RealistSpy

Oi lad if you still have no luck I will huck you up with couple of girls . Am serious like.

yummycake

Op you should be cherishing what you have now. Not many people can say what you've just told us. Cherish it because you will meet someone.

Please not a hooker

I firmly believe you will feel worse when you're done because for the rest of your life you'll always have to remember that you had to pay for you're first kiss. No-one wants that.

needhelpguy

I think its a great idea. But go the whole way with the "escort" since you might as well.

Remember you're getting too caught up in this "relationship" "kissing" "girl" thing. It really is only a small part of life and there are many people perfectly happy with being single for their whole life because they are happy in themselves. Despite what society tells you, you don't need a girl to make you happy. Remember that.

Anyway go for it if you want!

MJOR

I think that paying someone to have your first kiss with them would be pretty sad if i am honest. There is nothing wrong with not having kissed or been physical with someone... It'll happen but the more you sit an think about it the less likely it is to happen!

DAVE_K

nowt wrong with sleeping with a prostitute - i'd go escort though as opposed to prostitute - a mate of mine had his first sh@g with one and had only fond memories of it - or you could try selling your virginity on e-bay "buy it now for............................0 euros"

For a lot of guys it's not the pit of desperation it's a no-strings chance to bed a seriously fine sexually experienced woman.......you know the phrase "there's women you pay for and women you don't and the women you pay for are a hell of a lot cheaper in the end"

[Jackass]

You don't know where those lips have been fella. I wouldn't stick me todger near those lips, never mind my own lips!!

Try internet dating, speed dating, dating agency or night clubs...not a hooker though fella!!

Monkey61

lottowinner234 wrote: »

i love coppers and the thought of you comparing it to a whore house just isnt really on to be honest! i have great nights there, mind you i wouldnt bring a hand bag out of there cause all the guys are after one thing in there and thats what gives the place its reputation!!

What??? I never said you can't have a great night there. It does in fairness have the reputation of somewhere people go to score members of the opposite sex. I'm not quite sure why you find me saying that offensive. I'm not implying that everyone who goes there is a whore, if that is what you thought. It would be very unfair to as its not true.

It's equally not fair to suggest that "all the guys there are after one thing."

Anyway, my point being that it would be much easier for the OP to kiss someone in a place that's more reminiscent of a school disco than in Whelans or somewhere like that.


Unfortunately, as a lot of us probably learned when we were teenagers, sometimes things just don't happen, you have to actually go out there and do something about it. First kisses are rarely magical anyway and in this case I think any first kiss will do wonders for the OP's confidence. He just needs to get out there and put himself in situations where it might happen. He's not going to get his first kiss sitting at home in front of the tv at night. It would be unfair to peddle the myth that one day when the time is right it will just occur, because it may never unless he gets out there and does something about it!

PS: If you havn't already read it, I would definitely advise reading Neil Strauss' "The Game". It gives a lot of useful tips on how to talk to girls and get past the awkwardness. Obviously I'm not suggesting that you turn into some sort of monster, going round picking up girls for sport, but if you ignore the madness it does explain how attraction works and is perfect if your'e just looking to chat someone up rather than find the love of your life!

The Mighty Ken

[Jackass] wrote: »

You don't know where those lips have been fella. I wouldn't stick me todger near those lips, never mind my own lips!!

To be fair, most sex workers practice safe sex and, I would dare to say, most 'regular' people don't. You're just as likely to catch something off a receptionist from Baldoyle as you are a hooker from Bratislava.

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

craichoe

The Scientist wrote: »

Most Brassers wont do any 'normal kissing' anyway... so your probably not gonna get much luck.

She may do a portuguese breakfast though ..

WilmaRidesAgain

"You don't know where those lips have been fella. I wouldn't stick me todger near those lips, never mind my own lips!!"

Vast majority of street girls will not kiss punters OP, however I dont see anything wrong with getting an escort/call girl for the first time.

Its all very well us all being idealistic about the "first time" and how it should be but I know if it was me and I was in my late 20's and still had got nothing, well something is better than nothing, besides OP if you save up you will be able to afford a girl you probs would not be able to pull in real life and how nice will that be for your first time. Use condoms of course.

I think an escort would be nicer than a street girl for you especially if you are morally conflicted about it all. You can ask the escort to do "girlfriend experience" for you, if you pay enough some of them will stay all night, talk/kiss and all that.

It could well be that once you break that ice and get that monkey off your back you will be away on a hack, a lot more fellas use protitutes than admit it believe me and loads of late starters like yourself.

LegacyUser

ASadCase wrote: »

I am in my late 20's. I have never kissed a girl. While other posters here in lheir late teens & early 20's talk about their woes being a virgin, I have never even kissed a girl!

Never worry about other people's experience, 9 times out of 10 people are lying/exagerrating. Being a virgin at almost 30's fine, when it happens it happens

ASadCase wrote: »

This is too old to have absolutely 0 sexual experience. Thats why I am thinking of using a prostitute, Not for sex. Just for kissing. But I have doubts about how right it is . Unfortunately, it seems I have morals. If I was to use one, I would choose somebody in their 30's from somewhere like England so that there is a good chance they are in the sex trade because of their own choice. But I am so torn... I dont think it is right. But then again, is it right that I have missed out on so much?

Trying to get a hooker to kiss you wouldn't be wise, you may as well try and get her to put her shoe on her head.

Find your local meatmarket disco, get somebody drunk and have yer wicked way with her! you'll gain confidence and be a stud in weeks!

Swampy

caoibhin wrote: »

Dont mind the kissing. If you pay good money, go straight for the good stuff. Loads of time for kissing.

It may be a good boast too. That you had sex before you even kissed a girl.

here here.

Get your ass over to spain or somewhere it is legal first of all if your going to do it. Or else go to somewhere like Thailand. Trust me you will have a girlfriend in no time.

gogglebok

caoibhin wrote: »

I sort of wish my Da had brought me to a prostitute when i was 12 or 13. It would have gotten rid of a lot of stress about getting laid for the following 4 years.

I wonder about that. Wouldn't it just have replaced it with a lot of stress about getting laid again? Now if your Da had brought you to a sequence of prositutes several times a week from the ages of 12 to 18 or so....

OP, kissing is about intimacy. It's the intimacy you want to have, I feel, rather than the physical action. I don't think a prostitute is the answer.

Marksie

ASadCase wrote: »

I am in my late 20's. I have never kissed a girl. While other posters here in lheir late teens & early 20's talk about their woes being a virgin, I have never even kissed a girl!

This is too old to have absolutely 0 sexual experience. Thats why I am thinking of using a prostitute, Not for sex. Just for kissing. But I have doubts about how right it is . Unfortunately, it seems I have morals. If I was to use one, I would choose somebody in their 30's from somewhere like England so that there is a good chance they are in the sex trade because of their own choice. But I am so torn... I dont think it is right. But then again, is it right that I have missed out on so much?

So what have you done that stops you actually getting to know girls? or what dont you do?

This isnt about stress relief losing your virginity or any other such thing..by your own admission all you want to do is kiss!

Morals have nothing to do with this..whatever is motivating you to not go and talk and go for a kiss at the end of the night is the issue here.

That will not be resolved by the route you are taking. It would be in fact a waste of time, you may as well practice on the miirror fgopr all the engagement you will get and it still wont solve your underlying issues

Lucy Locket

HI OP,

Nothing wrong with doing it if that is what you really really want to do. But do you also want that to be the memory of your first kiss??? When you get asked what was your first kiss??....errrrr.....

It really is your personal choice, but I'm sure if you just put trying to get the kiss out of your mind and just go out and meet a girl, do a bit of flirthing and chatting up it will happen for you and it will be alot better that the kiss with a prostitute.

Good luck with what ever you decide

geuro

[Jackass] wrote: »

You don't know where those lips have been fella. I wouldn't stick me todger near those lips, never mind my own lips!!

hmmm.. if i cold put me todger near my own lips i'd have called in sick this morning and stayed at home in bed for the day.

on a serious note op, i don't think being with a hooker is going to sort out your problem. You will still feel like you have never experienced your first kiss. The physical side of a kiss is great, bit it's all about who your kissing, about feeling wanted and about feeling affection.

Just don't panic, try to keep your confidence in a decent shape, and try to talk to women a little more. Feel no shame and don't feel you need to hide your inexperience. Don't obsess - i know it's easier said than done, but try your best.. and good luck

cocacola

Definitely get a prostitute. I dont bother just kissing. Have sex - you paid for it! Make sure she teaches you ... I'm sure she'd had loads of experience!

Dunno how much they cost but rip-off ireland means you would probably be
better off getting one in Amsterdam or something. 100% legal! While you are
there have a hash cake as well. It'll make you (and the prostitute) more relaxed!.

And seriously - copper face jacks - is the place if you just want a girl.
You definitely don't want to stay with her but it's good for building up
experience.

Once's you're not a n00b you'll see ... the beetches, they love the cheddar!:pac:

Irishcrx

I don't know I think this is being looked at the wrong way, OP I wouldn't go the route of getting a brasser for your first kiss or first time, your forcing yourself far too much and in the long run when you look back you will most likely regret it. Imagine your future girlfriend or wife asking you about your first time you'd be mortified telling them about it.

As said get the book "The game" and have a read of it, maybe have a look at www.okcupid.com which is a dating website chating to a few girls over it may help you practise your confidence, put yourself out there, go out with friends, try to spark even the simplist conversation with a girl and see how it goes and I guarentee you it will happen with a bit of time and effort and will get easier and you will look back and be glad you went that route.

Also maybe join a gym and lift some weights, work out may help your self confidence you'd be amazed what you can do in a few weeks when you put your mind to it, life won't show you the path unless you walk it. good luck.

Wagon

I'm thinking a prostitute isn't a bad idea. But keep it under your hat. At the very least, you can overcome this fear you seem to have of intimacy and once that mental block is gone you'll have enough self confidence to get out there and meet people (be prepared to be rejected though, it happens to all of us). It's entirely up to you though. There's a lot of people saying it's a bad idea and i can see where they're coming from but if you really want to go for it then do.

LegacyUser

I wouldnt kiss a prostitute.

However my first sexual experience was with a prostitute.
I was in a similar situation as yourself,but this wasnt planned.

A group of us were on holidays and went to the red light district.
Few of the lads were paying for sex and being a little drunk I decided to go along.

It was quick,easy and purely physical. I thought I would feel strange afterwards that my first time was with a prostitute but its just a physical thing. And I dont feels nervous about sex anymore.