how far is too far

taidghbaby

i need some advice on how much injury/hurt/revenge/death i should inflict on someone:

last night i brought home a girl who i'd been out with a couple of times, for the first time, for a night-cap and maybe more.

anyway i got home to find one of my housemates havin a party (about 6 people)-after dinkin all my alcohol-he had none of his own.
i could live with the drink havin been drank-i mean share and share alike.

however the girl i was with then asked me to come see something in the bathroom-when i got there i was disgusted to find sh1t all over the floor,sink and the toilet! also there were used toilet roll in the sink & bath-basically if you locked a pig in there for a week they wouldn't have made as bad a mess!!

at the time i decided not to say anything because 1. it could have been an accident and the person could have been intending to clean it up and 2. i was more interested in the girl!

looking at it now i think that whoever did this, actually did it on purpose!!

i then woke up in the morning to find the girl had left in the middle of the night, not saying a word (i would have too if i was in her shoes) and also neither the bathroom had been cleaned nor the kitchen which had half eaten kebabs and other stuff covering it!!

also a couple of others in the house would have had to used that bathroom to get ready for work thismorning.

basically i have spent most my day wondering what to do: should i find out who did this and return the favour, kick my housemate out, or wait for him with a 4 iron and inflict a lot of damage/death when he gets home, etc.

anyone have any ideas,advice,comments or even experience in such matters that they would like to share with me??

Nichololas

Poop in a tortilla wrap, garnish with some peppers and then leave it on a plate beside his bed.

biko

Kick him out, the toilet thing is too far imo

kraggy

Kick him out.

You insulted pigs when you mentioned them in the same context as your flat mate.

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

John_Mc

Couldn't live with someone like that - he'd be getting kicked out for sure

taidghbaby

kraggy wrote: »

Kick him out.

You insulted pigs when you mentioned them in the same context as your flat mate.

i dont actually think he did it-i think it was one of his friends, but if one of my friends did that i'd kick their head in and make them clean it or else clean it meself!!

STUBBORNGIRL

Find out who did it and ask them to clean it up and then tell them to find somewhere else to live (after they have cleaned it up) they may not clean it up if you tell them to leave firstly! That is not acceptable!

What normal person would Sh!t around the place! sorry all i can say is you are very patient because i would have screamed the place down when i came home to that! oh Good God i dont think anyone would have wanted to be in the house had i come home to that sh!t!!!!!

STUBBORNGIRL

taidghbaby wrote: »

i dont actually think he did it-i think it was one of his friends, but if one of my friends did that i'd kick their head in and make them clean it or else clean it meself!!

Okay just read this now! Well you tell him to clean it he had the party in there in the first place and you ban all his friends from coming around again! who is to say they wont do it again if let into the house! Let him move out if he thinks its unreasonable!!! PIGS! (sorry i insulted pigs!)

HJ Simpson

There is no too far in this situation. However he must have brought some poeple back to the house that he didnt know. Make him clean up and then show him the door.

c - 13

Make him clean the place, then kick him the **** out

briantwin

probably the best thing you could do is wait till his friends are around again, when there are women present and bring it up as a "funny" story. get pissed off and just ask which one of the "hilarious" bunch shat all over the floor and left it there like a f*ckin animal. Im sure some of the group will let slip who did it. Mortifying them and also letting you know who's going to help you with your golf swing!!

taidghbaby

HJ Simpson wrote: »

There is no too far in this situation. However he must have brought some poeple back to the house that he didnt know. Make him clean up and then show him the door.

i think your right-we've been living here for over two years and ive never seen those people before!! plus they were mid twenties at best and he's late thirties.
i just cant understand how someone would do this! if it was an accident fair enough but why not clean it up......and if they did it on purpose then what kinda sick twisted demented fcuk are they????

c - 13

taidghbaby wrote: »

i think your right-we've been living here for over two years and ive never seen those people before!! plus they were mid twenties at best and he's late thirties.
i just cant understand how someone would do this! if it was an accident fair enough but why not clean it up......and if they did it on purpose then what kinda sick twisted demented fcuk are they????

You'd be very surprised what some people do in others houses simply becasue they can ...

Also brace yourself in case the same guy decided to play hide the ****e somewhere in the house. Check theres nothing in your cistern by the way.

connundrum

Shit in his mouth as he sleeps, then kick him out.

Boom_Bap

I had something similar happen before. One of my housemates had one too many sherries and decided that he thought he was going to die and wanted to go out with a bang. So he locked himself in the pot and decided to sheet and pee pee and puke all over the bathroom. He even took a dump on the floor beside the door so that when it open it left a snail trail along the lovely tiled floor. He was drinking bottles of red wine too (by the neck) and his puke was a lovely purple colour....there's probably still some of it encrusted behind the radiator in the bathroom.

Needles to say, he didnt die and woke up the next morning covered in his bodily mess and was a wee bit embarrassed.

Looking back now, i think it was hilarious. At the time, i was an angry angry man. Forgive him and move on.

I too did not get the girl that night, mainly because i passed out from drinking too much Jim Beam while peeing out my bedroom window.

BOOM

CtrlSource

Maybe she only drew your attention to the bathroom because she's into that sort of thing? heh heh..


But seriously, your best options are:

A) Kick him out.
Find new digs for yourself.

Yep, A or B tbh

Dord

taidghbaby wrote: »

i dont actually think he did it-i think it was one of his friends, but if one of my friends did that i'd kick their head in and make them clean it or else clean it meself!!

Kick him out, he's responsible for his friends if he invites them around.

Ruu_Old

I'd be well shot of him, make sure he cleans it and tell him to leave when he is finished.

ART6

He took your drinks and shared them with a gang of scumbags, who then went on to foul your bathroom and cause your date to abandon ship, and you want to know what to do? Me, I'd have kicked the bl**dy lot of 'em including him out on the spot, with a few broken noses to help 'em on their way:mad:

eldeabroad

maybe she did it herself....

taidghbaby

eldeabroad wrote: »

maybe she did it herself....

hmmmmm...didnt think of that

Abi

taidghbaby wrote: »

anyone have any ideas,advice,comments or even experience in such matters that they would like to share with me??

Instant chuckable-outable offence. You are responsible for yourself and whomever you bring into it, as is he. Fuck him out. And on the day that hes leaving when his back is turned, shit in his suitcase.

Ring your girl and tell her you apologise for the scenes she saw, and that hes been given his notice to gtfo.


Bang out of order tbh.

Black Swan

taidghbaby wrote: »

i then woke up in the morning to find the girl had left in the middle of the night, not saying a word (i would have too if i was in her shoes) and also neither the bathroom had been cleaned

Maybe she had to go?

taidghbaby

Abigayle wrote: »

Instant chuckable-outable offence. You are responsible for yourself and whomever you bring into it, as is he. Fuck him out. And on the day that hes leaving when his back is turned, shit in his suitcase.

Ring your girl and tell her you apologise for the scenes she saw, and that hes been given his notice to gtfo.


Bang out of order tbh.

she's just txt me and made a joke about it so that miten't be too bad!!!

im gonna wait here until he gets back from to see what he has to say for himself!!!

Dragan

taidghbaby wrote: »

i dont actually think he did it-i think it was one of his friends, but if one of my friends did that i'd kick their head in and make them clean it or else clean it meself!!

Bingo. My general rule is that you are responsible for whoever you bring into the house...if it was one of his mates that did it then he needs to clean it up.

If i was you, and it wasn't done quickly the guy would be given two choice, either to clean it up and leave, or to get kicked out and watch some of his possession burn in the street.

Abi

taidghbaby wrote: »

im gonna wait here until he gets back from to see what he has to say for himself!!!

You do that, and dont hold back now. Take no shit off him :pac:







Im sorry.

Wertz

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

Maybe she had to go?

Yeah but all over the floor and walls?

Loopy

What a shithead. Kick his ass out pronto.

Before he goes though make a big BEEF Curry and take a dump in it. Invite his mates too, let them all dig in..

mahamageehad

looptheloop wrote: »

What a shithead. Kick his ass out pronto.

Before he goes though make a big BEEF Curry and take a dump in it. Invite his mates too, let them all dig in..

and also film it and put it on youtube as an everlasting tribute to your revenge!!

Rb

Tie him up and leave him in the bathroom, then move out and leave him there to rot in his own/his friends mess.

Maddison

Im assuming you know who did it so heres what to do:
Take the bulb out of his bedroom when you know hes on the beer, and have a number 2 in his bed, exit & lie in wait for the screams. Revenge is best served cold!!

The Bollox

what is wrong with people? what kind of sick, twisted individual would do that? find out who it is and kick the living daylights out of him

x in the city

the replies on this are freaking gas.....




but yeh, kick the n0b out.

if he has a car leave dog poo all over the seats also

Steve_o

kick him the f**k out.... what sort of assh*le would do that in fairness!!!

GirlInterrupted

To call the culprit an animal is an insult to animals - dogs don't **** in their own space..

Boom_Bap

Here's what you do, get his tub of dairygold, carefully remove the full slab of butter. Take a dump in the empty tub, a good solid one is prefered so eat a power bar earlier in the day....consistency is the key.
Place the slab of butter ontop of the lovely poo ensuring that it is hidden. Put butter back to where you found it and advise other housemates not to touch it.
He'll eventually scrape down to the glorious brown sausage.
Mission Accomplished.

BOOM

Maddison

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Here's what you do, get his tub of dairygold, carefully remove the full slab of butter. Take a dump in the empty tub, a good solid one is prefered so eat a power bar earlier in the day....consistency is the key.
Place the slab of butter ontop of the lovely poo ensuring that it is hidden. Put butter back to where you found it and advise other housemates not to touch it.
He'll eventually scrape down to the glorious brown sausage.
Mission Accomplished.

BOOM

But Boom surely the browness would show through, mabey a choc spread jar would be better, what do you think??:D

taidghbaby

have to say some very imaginative people on here

it now seems the culprit was so drunk that he fell off the toilet in the middle of sh1ttin!! they tried to clean it up (and said they got most of it) before i got home (i cant bring myself to imagine how it could of been worse)

anyone know of an airspray type disinfectant?

(also i still have revenge very much in my mind so keep suggestions coming!!)

Maddison

T-Baby, sorry forgot how to spell your first name!!When my OH makes a mess in the loo(When hes drunk & passed out) rather than waiting for him to get out of his coma I normally get a large towel & do a mummy type dressing over my head so I smell no evil, spray every surface with dettol(lots of it) wait til it is ''removable'' & with full gloves on I use an entire kitchen roll. Now in saying that the worst hes ever done was slight pebbledashing!!!But when hes drunk he sleep walks so any puddles are suspect.

taidghbaby

Maddison wrote: »

T-Baby, sorry forgot how to spell your first name!!When my OH makes a mess in the loo(When hes drunk & passed out) rather than waiting for him to get out of his coma I normally get a large towel & do a mummy type dressing over my head so I smell no evil, spray every surface with dettol(lots of it) wait til it is ''removable'' & with full gloves on I use an entire kitchen roll. Now in saying that the worst hes ever done was slight pebbledashing!!!But when hes drunk he sleep walks so any puddles are suspect.

actually ive just remembered another occassion when a drunken room-mate went sleepwalkin and mixed my room up with the toilet (and funnily enough a girl i'd brought home for the first time was with me), i wont elaborate anymore!

i'm begining to think it could be somethin to do with this house!!! :eek:

Maddison

Oh god this also reminds me of when my sisters boyfriend stayed over in my dads house with her, they were out having a few beers went home & her OH got up to go the loo, my sis was wondering what was going on when she heard the roars of my dad. THe OH had walked into the aul lads room, whipped it out & proceeded to p*ss on my dads bed.....CLASSIC!!:D

s14driftking

Maddison wrote: »

Oh god this also reminds me of when my sisters boyfriend stayed over in my dads house with her, they were out having a few beers went home & her OH got up to go the loo, my sis was wondering what was going on when she heard the roars of my dad. THe OH had walked into the aul lads room, whipped it out & proceeded to p*ss on my dads bed.....CLASSIC!!:D

ive done tat once before lol
your best bet is to tell him to clean it when he comes home and no more parties from now on if it happens again tell him hell have to move out

Sherifu

taidghbaby wrote: »

however the girl i was with then asked me to come see something in the bathroom-when i got there i was disgusted to find sh1t all over the floor,sink and the toilet! also there were used toilet roll in the sink & bath-basically if you locked a pig in there for a week they wouldn't have made as bad a mess!!

Epic. Maybe a dirty protest?

NorfolkEnchants

Simple - sh!t in his pillow case and say nothing to anyone

Zzippy

People, I think we're missing the point here.

The question should be: "OP, did you score anyway?"

MissHoneyBun

• Take 6 ounces of anger and add 8 large teaspoons of rage
• Sprinkle with a pinch of disgust.
• Mix well.
• Simmer for approx 24 hours.
• Allow to cool, then serve with a swift blow to the head.

Voila!

Bon Revanche mon cherie

blindpilot

Pop some hair removal cream in his shampoo. Works a treat believe me. Then whack him with a club and sh*t on his bald head.

goz83

Ok here's what to do. Take a dump into one of his socks and put it back into his sock drawer. Wipe your ass with his favourite shirt and piss into his bottle of cologne after you've emptied it down the toilet. Make dinner and put laxative into his portion. So when he comes home he will have a nice meal and the ****es for the rest of the night. His room will stink of poo and it will take him forever to find the source. His fave shirt will be needing a bin and he will be pissed off when he sprays his new scent on.

Then say....."your friends certainly get around the house don't they? Maybe you should keep them the fcuk out!!!"

He may get the message first time around. If not...Dump on his chest while he sleeps.

BraziliaNZ

when i shared a house with my brother and a mate back home, I had been seeing a girl for not long and took her home for only the 2nd or 3rd time. Anyway when I took her to my room they had covered the walls in pictures of bodybuilders torn out of FLEX magazine, even the ceiling. It was embarassing but funny. Never got revenge though .

lorna100

good god, the replies to this are absolutly hilarious!!!