he has a new gf

LegacyUser

I just found out my ex bf has a new gf, he told me himself. We broke up a few months ago and were together four years, we remained friends but i never got over him. He met a girl (he claims shes a friends sister) over the weekend and he is smitten, he wont shut up about her, hes given up smoking for her and she wants him to stop drinking and he is.

He is making plans with her and they are planning to go to asia next year on holidays, hes been with her 3 days.

Im heartbroken, he knows i still love him and he knows how hard it is for me to hear all this, he texts me all the time going on about how happy he is etc. I told him to stop that it was hurting me and he apoligised.

Then today i saw them together at the bank and i actually ran to a pub and got sick in the loo. Im in bits. I text him and told him i cnt know him anymore that it hurt way too much and i cant take it, and he didnt even answer me.

Im in bits here!!

togster

This happens when you stay friends. Cut all contact.

Femelade

Sorry to hear that OP
If this is hurting you so much then you do need to avoid him, delete his number etc.
He has clearly moved on, its time you do too.

redfacedbear

Very insensitive of him to be giving you all the details of the new relationship. It sounds as if he has very definately moved on and sees you as nothing more than a friend.

You sound as if you haven't moved on at all. Now that you can clearly see that the relationship is over, cut all contact, properly grieve what you have lost and begin to move on.

I wish you all the best, you have tough times ahead of you but it will get better.

RedXIV

Yup, everyone goes through this so don't think you're alone in this experience. Def the "friends" idea was not a good one, especially if your were still good enough to be texting on a regular basis. In fairness, he may not have realised that you still weren't completely over it yet and is trying to involve you in his life as a friend.

As said above, cut all ties, go out and concentrate on making yourself happy. go on a holiday with mates, go take up a sport or somthing. And ask (nicely) of your ex to refrain from contacting you unless absolutly necessary while you deal with this.

It will pass so all you need to do is give it time. best of luck

LegacyUser

RedXIV wrote: »

In fairness, he may not have realised that you still weren't completely over it yet and is trying to involve you in his life as a friend.

He knows he asked me a month ago if i still love him and i told him i did, at that stage he said he was thinking of giving us another go , hence why im so upset:(

Hitchhiker's Guide to...

RedXIV wrote: »

In fairness, he may not have realised that you still weren't completely over it yet and is trying to involve you in his life as a friend.

I think this is probably the truth of the matter, although it's fairly dumb of him

smellybiker

RedXIV wrote: »

Yup, everyone goes through this so don't think you're alone in this experience. Def the "friends" idea was not a good one, especially if your were still good enough to be texting on a regular basis. In fairness, he may not have realised that you still weren't completely over it yet and is trying to involve you in his life as a friend.

As said above, cut all ties, go out and concentrate on making yourself happy. go on a holiday with mates, go take up a sport or somthing. And ask (nicely) of your ex to refrain from contacting you unless absolutly necessary while you deal with this.

It will pass so all you need to do is give it time. best of luck

+1

the sad fact of the matter is that you probably hoped deep down that by staying friends, you too would find your way back together - i was in the same situation and was convinced that my ex would fall back in love with me. it didn't work and i only hurt myself more in the long run seeing him being completely and utterly over me!!

you don't need that so just cut ties!!

niavie

Cut ALL contact with him. Keep yourself busy, call your friends, go out with them, take up a new hobby, try and meet new people so you won't find yourself thinking about the past all the time. If you see him with her again hold your head high.

MonkeyTennis

nothing much to add here. Definitely start making some plans of your own. Book some tickets to a concert, go for a trip/little holiday. Start filling your calendar. I absolutely guarantee 100% you will feel better!!;)

Wibbs

I agree with those before me. Cut contact as doing so will speed up the process. I know it may sound counterproductive but it's not. While some can remain friends after a split, most don't or are kidding themselves. It can only happen if both have mutually decided on the split, which is rare enough or both have moved on, even then there is the risk of re surfacing emotions is still there. Life's too short.

You will have a hard time emotionally for a while. You can take that to the bank, but it will pass with time, if you do one thing. It's a hard thing but you need to truly accept it's over. If it helps to think that you never know what'll happen in the future fine, but you have to accept it's over for the foreseeable future. You need to move on.





I will say that he sounds a bit extreme in his emotions if after only three days he's giving up fags and booze and planning big trips away with someone he basically doesn't know from adam. Emotionally mature people are aware that love requires time and don't jump so hastily. I have found those that jump so quickly into love are just as likely to jump out of love just as quickly. The fact that he's telling you all this also shows he's moved on and at this stage isn't taking into account your feelings on the matter and keeping his trap shut.

Wibbs

HEARTBROKEN:( wrote: »

He knows he asked me a month ago if i still love him and i told him i did, at that stage he said he was thinking of giving us another go , hence why im so upset:(

He was hedging his bets basically. Now something shiny and new has come along he's jumped with both feet.

Dragan

With all due respect the two of you are not friends. If you were friends you would want to see each other and accept whatever it was that made the other person happy. That is what friends do.

What you need to do is take some time with him out of your life and get your head together and then decide if you can do the above.

towel401

he is just trying to rub it in your face. he is a douche, nothing more. I can't stand people like that and I know a few of them in real life

6th

He might just be on the rebound. If it all fell apart with the new girl could/would you take him back?

cjmcork

OP - been there done that and we all worked together - get rid of his number from your mobile and cut all contact - it's the only way - it's hard enough to get over a long-term relationship without having daily contact - by the way, hello - REBOUND! they never last (except for my ex - he married his - they are miserable though )........sorry, that's bitchy, but still.........

100gSoma

togster wrote: »

This happens when you stay friends. Cut all contact.

yep. I think probably everyone learns this the hard way...Total cut off. no text, no email, nothing. Sounds like you have never accepted its over, thats why your still feeling sick etc. cutting all contact will help you along the recovery path.

LegacyUser

Sabotage wrote: »

He might just be on the rebound. If it all fell apart with the new girl could/would you take him back?

I dont know, i love him so much but we fought all the time and annnoyed the hell out of each other, It had to end sometime and i could never fully trust him so i prob wouldnt

Rare Man Fidlle

Everyone before me is totally right, but I'm guessing you already know all these things, after all it's common sense. But common sense goes out the window when you're feeling the way you are.....! What you need to do is force yourself to move on, get a new outfit, new hair do, nice little sexy outfit and go out there and get your Mojo working again...!!! I bet that if he sees that you've moved on as much as he leading you to believe he has, he'll be sniffing around, especially if you get that hot little outfit......but don't fall for it..!!

LegacyUser

cjmcork wrote: »

hello - REBOUND!

i dont think hes on the rebound, this is his 1st gf since me and he had the chance to get back with me about a month ago when i told him how i felt

Wibbs

It may not be a rebound, but it has a fair few of the hallmarks of it. Overly quick attachment for a start. Rebounds could be defined as entering a realtionship while the feelings, bad or good from the previous relationship are still in play. The old relationship and it's demise has not been processed yet. Some do this ll their lies, then end up hitched and wonder how they got there. Not good.

The obvious one is a person who is dumped going straight into a new relationship to get over the old, but there are variations. Those who do the dumping do it as much. Diving headlong into a new relationship soon after the end of a serious long termer is another obvious one. Add in that he was still "confused" and was considering going back with you and I reckon it is a rebound.

As I said I reckon he's not the most emotionally mature person judging from what you've told us.

How Strange

OP, I'm sorry that you're in this mess right now. It's cruel and awful. I think everyone has experienced this at some stage.

I agree with what everyone else has already said.

I also think your ex is acting like a prat and is trying to prove to you that he moved on first. He may be a nice guy most of the time but right now he's acting like an ar5e. I think he's enjoying rubbing your face in it which is particularly cruel considering you spent 4 years together.

OP, as everyone has said cut contact completely. Don't be his shoulder to cry on if this infatuation goes belly up. Think about what you would like to do over the next few months to mend your broken heart. Be completely indulgent and focus on making yourself happy again. Then do it.

Wagon

Sorry to hear that OP. But I agree with everyone else. Cut all contact, there's nothing else for it.

Nevyn

HEARTBROKEN:( wrote: »

i dont think hes on the rebound, this is his 1st gf since me and he had the chance to get back with me about a month ago when i told him how i felt

So you let him know you wanted back with him and still had feels and not only did he not get back with you he promptly went and got with someone else.

So you upset, feeling betrayed and your hopes were dashed, pretty much for you it's like you have just broken up with him all over again.

You need to take a deep breath and cut contact with him.
Let him do what ever he wants with his life, make his own mistakes and learn from them and you have to do the same for yourself.

What are you going to do next ?

Because the last thing you need is to be hearing about the new relationship and being asked advice about it.
It's not fair on you and it's not fair on your ex because you can not be his friend in this situation,
not while you are stilling hurting.

kittensoft1984

This happened to me before.

You need to cut contact straight away. For 2 reasons:

1. You wont move on unless you do cos he will always be around

2. It seems to me that he is trying to make you jealous of his new relationship. With the fact that you say he rings etc to tell you how great it is (i could be wrong on this)

But you need to cut contact - i know this is easier said than done! But it will be the best on the long run. And as Rare Man Fidlle get out there and start enjoying life again!

LegacyUser

Thaedydal wrote: »

What are you going to do next ?

In which sense? Well ive told i cant know him and i explained why and he didnt answer me, i hate how he treated me i bent over backwards for him and he always promised no one would come between us and he has allowed her to.

LegacyUser

kittensoft1984 wrote: »

2. It seems to me that he is trying to make you jealous of his new relationship. With the fact that you say he rings etc to tell you how great it is (i could be wrong on this)

I dont think hes trying to make me jealous, hed just text me and be like "just bk from town with the gf, shes so nice etc, and at one point when he text me he said "im not trying to make you jealous here" so i dont know what to think half the time

Im just sickned we were friends before we dated and even when we broke up we were still great mates and he has no prob letting me leave his life for someone he knows 3 days it makes me sick

Beruthiel

You are waaaay too emotionally involved with him to ever move on while still in contact.

You must cut ALL contact and have nothing more to do with him. Only then will you be able to get back to normal.

A.Partridge

HEARTBROKEN:( wrote: »

...., hes given up smoking for her and she wants him to stop drinking and he is.

Jesus...no drinkin... no smokin...she sounds like a barrel of laughs altogether.

On the other hand you sound normal. He'll regret this for sure.

Drummerboy2

Three days and he is planning so so much. Have seen these type of romances before, and they usually explode as quick as they began. Expect him to come back to you when he falls flat in his face.

LegacyUser

not wanting to hijack the thread in anyway but I just want to say it happens the other way about 2....my ex girlfriend is in italy studyin for the yr......bout 3 weeks ago i was dumped, saying she needed space. 2 days after she txts to say she went wit another fella and gradually since has seen him more often (she telling me this btw). im so gutted as it was the best 3 yrs of my life previous and then this happens i dunno wat to think.



again, apologies about butting into the thread here, just wanted to show it can happen from both sides.

BJC

togster wrote: »

This happens when you stay friends. Cut all contact.

Totally agree, I could never get over an ex if I stayed friends and I doubt he's so dense that he doesn't know it's hurting you. Ex's get a sick pleasure from sh*t like this From his point of view he feel's loved from you and his new bit of crumpet. I can assure you that if you got with a bloke now it would absolutely wreck his head.

HEARTBROKEN:( wrote: »

He always promised no one would come between us and he has allowed her to.

Been there aswell, they are always idle promises to make the break-up easier, whether you cut contact now or in ten years, you will not be life-long friends, what you had has now ended and for your own sanity you need to keep away from him, be heartless, delete all memories! (phone numbers, photos..videos...etc)

Drummerboy2 wrote: »

Three days and he is planning so so much. Have seen these type of romances before, and they usually explode as quick as they began. Expect him to come back to you when he falls flat in his face.

+1, totally agree again. These are usually chirpy but short lived relationships that explode in the faces of both parties involved.

But when/if it does, you should still stay away, don't comfort him, only sex and emotional turmoil will result! (did for me anyway)

Nevyn

HEARTBROKEN:( wrote: »

In which sense? Well ive told i cant know him and i explained why and he didnt answer me, i hate how he treated me i bent over backwards for him and he always promised no one would come between us and he has allowed her to.

I dont think hes trying to make me jealous, hed just text me and be like "just bk from town with the gf, shes so nice etc, and at one point when he text me he said "im not trying to make you jealous here" so i dont know what to think half the time

Im just sickned we were friends before we dated and even when we broke up we were still great mates and he has no prob letting me leave his life for someone he knows 3 days it makes me sick

Werther he is or is not trying to make you jealous he is being an inconsiderate prat. He may not be hurting you intentionally but he is certainly not thinking about how you maybe feeling.

It sounds like you think you were still in a relationship with him a emotional and intimate one and he had just gone back to seeing you as a friend.

You can't make him want you, you can't make him choose you over this new person, you can't make things go back the way they were when you were dating or to how things were before you are dating.

You need to let him go and stop being around him and that way stop yourself form getting hurt and heal up. Maybe then you can be friends when all you want is friendship from him and his lack of consideration may not hurt you as much. Other wise you are going to end up very angry and very bitter.

smellybiker

whe my relationship ended, i tried to stay friends with my guy - however i just wanted him to be in touch so i could prance around with other guys to make him jealous - the plan backfired coz he never got jealous and while i was doing all of this, he was getting on with his life and moving onto the one place which took me longer to get to.

forget him, keep your distance an move on with your own life. put yourself first now coz it's clear he won't!!

Maggie Simpson

In my experience, tough as it is, you have to say goodbye to an ex when they become that - an ex. I had a long drawn-out thing with a guy once. He emigrated to the US so we broke up & stayed in touch by email, phone etc & would meet for coffee, drink whenever he was back in town. Nothing ever happened, but I suppose I thought that by keeping in contact it left the door open for something to happen in the future. A few times he did try & get back with me, but I knew it would only be short-term, for the few weeks he was home....anyway, one Christmas he's home & invites me NYE party he's having. So I told him it wasn't a good idea that we spent NY together....and he says, yeah you're probably right - I'm seeing someone in the States.

I was wretched for weeks after but after that I told him there was no point in us keeping in touch & it's remained that way. I've no doubt that one day I'll be walking down the street & run into him but there comes a time when you have to just get rid of people that don't make you happy.

smellybiker

very confused wrote: »

not wanting to hijack the thread in anyway but I just want to say it happens the other way about 2....my ex girlfriend is in italy studyin for the yr......bout 3 weeks ago i was dumped, saying she needed space. 2 days after she txts to say she went wit another fella and gradually since has seen him more often (she telling me this btw). im so gutted as it was the best 3 yrs of my life previous and then this happens i dunno wat to think.



again, apologies about butting into the thread here, just wanted to show it can happen from both sides.

it absolutely can happen both ways - as i said in earlier post - i did it myself - not something i'm proud of but was very immature at time!!

astrofool

If you want to cut contact, then cut contact, and don't be sitting on the edge of your phone waiting for him to text back agreeing/disagreeing to cut contact with you, exactly where do you want it to lead to?

You told him you wanted to get back together, he didn't, you wanted to remain friends, well being a friend means being told details of their other half, and taking the risk of seeing them together, I don't see why he's being inconsiderate, as it seems yourself is the one spending all your time obsessing about it, the fact he hasn't contacted you since you asking him to cut contact is a good thing, and he may have realised that you couldn't handle it.

Easiest thing to do is to block his number, or change your number, and stop obsessing, he's left you behind already.

The other situation is that IF he does break up with her, and then realises he wants to get back with you (and you still want to get back with him), then you breaking contact with him now cleanly and without an argument is by far the most conducive way to achieve that.

LegacyUser

astrofool wrote: »

You told him you wanted to get back together, he didn't,

.

Thats not what happened, he contacted me and told me he thinks he wants me back and asked how i felt about him, i told him i still loved him and he said he needed to think.

Then nothing more was said about it and all of a sudden he has a few gf

do you love it?

OP i feel your pain.
its HORRIBLE seeing the ex with someone new.
in my opinion i think he is probably just excited not to be in such a long relationship and the idea of someone new is just quite fresh but lets face it, she's his rebound.
he cant honestly love her after 3 days!
it will take a long time. i go by the sex and the city rule...it takes half the time you were dating the person to get over them.

sooooooo its gonna take him to years to get over you, where as that floozie will be forgotten within a day and a half!
hope it makes you smile!:)

af_thefragile

Get as far away from him as you can.
I was in similar situation, we tried the whole staying friends things. She gave me wayyy too many details about her new relationship which left me sick for days, if not weeks!!

So leave n go as far as you can from him. Try starting a new life. Forget him, he's history. Its hard i know. Its a horrible place to be in. But then sometimes all you can do is suck it up and try to move on with him.
Just stay away from him. The less you know about him and his relationship, the better off you are.

towel401

af_thefragile wrote: »

She gave me wayyy too many details about her new relationship which left me sick for days, if not weeks!!

.

thats quite a common thing it seems. they just want to brag about how happy they are with the new bf. this just friends **** just doesnt work when they find someone else.

Nevyn

It can do if they have some tact and consideration but often the bragging is them trying to convence themselves they have moved on.

af_thefragile

Thaedydal wrote: »

It can do if they have some tact and consideration but often the bragging is them trying to convence themselves they have moved on.

Could also be a way to make you jealous n stuff. Though i think its bout trying to convince themselves that they have found a brilliant relationship n have moved on. Especially when my ex used to go on about "i'm sorry what started off as a rebound turned into something this beautiful for me, i sometimes feel he's the guy i'm gonna end up marrying, he really loves me, i love him too" Yeah, had to listen to all of that with me dying slowly internally!!

She was trying to be "good friends" while still having the openness with one another we had during the relationship.:rolleyes:
Especially when she started to go on about how she had moved onto the pill and wasn't so sure if she was quite ready for it yet. That was the time i knew it was it and i couldn't take anymore of that crap and i decided to run away from her forever!!

I think the jealousy aspect of it works too. It worked especially well for me.
First made me jealous of her boyfriend who was regularly getting to share her bed (while i had hardly gotten anywhere with her!, i was taking it slow in a delusion thinking this relationship was eternal:rolleyes:).
And then again made me more jealous thinking how sad it was that i was still sitting in my room lamenting over my loss while she had moved on with a new bf and had completely forgotten about me (which is not entirely true cuz she periodically attempts to get back in contact with me which i try to reject away).

So yeah, the whole aftermath of the relationship had left me completely destroyed in every aspect. Only cuz i made the small mistake of trying to be friends with her after it all. Things would had been much better if i'ld have had walked a million miles away from her the day we broke up to never see or hear from her again.

smellybiker

sometimes people do things to make themselves feel better - the other people don't get a look in as long as they feel better!! i think that maybe he wanted to stay in contact coz he wanted to salvage something or have something from such a long time with the one person.

he obviously realises now with the way you cut him off that he was wrong to think he could salvage something and so, i think he will stay out of touch until you make the first move and we all know that it would be very wrong for you to get in contact!!!

there'll be alot of temptation to text him - especially if you don't see him - but just keep reminding yourself that it will only hurt you in the end!!

Aurora Borealis

OP haven't read all responses here but all horribleness aside if he's actually ready to love someone else again he's probably been out of love with you a long time and has just had difficulty letting it go. It's horrible I know but everyone deserves to be in something where their SO is there 100% which is quite obviously not the case here but will be with the right person, so chin up!! It hurts but in time if he really is someone you value you'll just be glad he's doing okay and glad you're in a position to meet someone who digs you as much as you do them.

Wibbs

af_thefragile wrote: »

Though i think its bout trying to convince themselves that they have found a brilliant relationship n have moved on. Especially when my ex used to go on about "i'm sorry what started off as a rebound turned into something this beautiful for me, i sometimes feel he's the guy i'm gonna end up marrying, he really loves me, i love him too"

That's a common one. Happened to me once way back and I've seen it with both men and women I know. In my experience it almost never works out. I say almost for balance as I've never seen it work. People who move on too quickly from one long termer to the next (without processing it first)rarely find solace in the long run. There are exceptions of course. Really long term relationships that have broken up long before it's official are a different thing.

She was trying to be "good friends" while still having the openness with one another we had during the relationship.:rolleyes:
Especially when she started to go on about how she had moved onto the pill and wasn't so sure if she was quite ready for it yet. That was the time i knew it was it and i couldn't take anymore of that crap and i decided to run away from her forever!!

That would be cake and eat it time. This may sound crass and harsh but if I fancy a woman then if she wants me as a shoulder to cry on, other parts of her body better be on the menu. OK there are exceptions like someone I may like and slightly fancy then fine, but if I have the actual hots for her? Nope. Thanks and goodbye. Ironically if you take that tack in those situations you are more likely to get more out of it. At least short term.

I would say exactly the same to women dealing with men, though usually it's the other way around in what they want. Men are more likely to want the legover without the hassle of emotional support. So in that case if he wants the other parts of your body, then make sure you're getting the shoulder to cry on too.

So yeah, the whole aftermath of the relationship had left me completely destroyed in every aspect. Only cuz i made the small mistake of trying to be friends with her after it all. Things would had been much better if i'ld have had walked a million miles away from her the day we broke up to never see or hear from her again.

And if you remember how you were at the start, so this is a lesson we all have to learn, hard though it may be.

smellybiker wrote:

sometimes people do things to make themselves feel better - the other people don't get a look in as long as they feel better!! i think that maybe he wanted to stay in contact coz he wanted to salvage something or have something from such a long time with the one person.

he obviously realises now with the way you cut him off that he was wrong to think he could salvage something and so, i think he will stay out of touch until you make the first move and we all know that it would be very wrong for you to get in contact!!!

there'll be alot of temptation to text him - especially if you don't see him - but just keep reminding yourself that it will only hurt you in the end!!

Nails it pretty much.

LegacyUser

Worst thing about going unregg is your posts come up late, could you guys read post 38 please i dont think any of you saw it

billymitchell

HEARTBROKEN:( wrote: »

Thats not what happened, he contacted me and told me he thinks he wants me back and asked how i felt about him, i told him i still loved him and he said he needed to think.

Then nothing more was said about it and all of a sudden he has a few gf

If I were you, I would tell him "f*ck right off". I know from your point of you view, you might be thinking "Yes, there still might be a chance of us getting back together, and it will go back to the happy old days".

But by the sounds of things, he just wants to make sure his safety net is still there. Just in case this new one isnt as good as he thinks, he will always have you to fall back on. But if he really wanted you back, what is he still doing with someone else?????

As everyone else said, cut contact. If he does contact you, just be cool and courteous. Dont make him think that you still want to get back with him. Make him believe that you have moved on, even if you havent. And after a while, you will find someone better who actually wants to be with you, and doesnt just want to play games with you.

Just take care of yourself now, and you'll be ok in no time!!

echosound

OK I read post no 38, and TBH it sounds like he was keeping you hanging on while he decided what he wanted to do. You were on the back burner as a safety net. You were dropped when this other girl came on the scene.

My advice? cut contact, it's still too raw for you to be friends. Perhaps in a few years when you've both moved on, you can be comfortable round each other, and be happy for each other. At the moment, you are cut up, and he is - consciously or not - kindof gloating about his new GF to try to make you feel low about yourself. It's part of human nature to be slightly smug about doing the whole "look how wonderful things are for me - aw poor you, you still stuck in the past and pining for me" routine. Some people can handle this well, and not rub your face in it, but many people can't help a little sneaking ego-boost at the expense of others, it's the thought that "oh I am so wonderful and unique that I have a wonderful new GF, and my old GF is so mad about me she is heartbroken without me cos I'm that special. I am clearly desirable and the ladies are falling all over me". It's just some people are slightly more decent that others and will make an effort to not come across like that and screw with a person's head, especially if they actually cared about them once upon a time.

I don't want to come across harsh, but that's my reading of it. He's secretly enjoying the attention and having two girls vying for his attention. Do yourself a favour and cut contact for a while to let yourself get over him.

You say that you knew it had to end sometime, so focus on that - clearly you weren't 100% happy in the relationship anyway, so why would you want to go back to it again?

I know it probably hurts right now but cut contact and make things easier on yourself to get over the relationship.

Karen_*

Heartbroken I don't have any great advice for you but I really really feel for you. As someone who is fairly gutted at present I hate to see anyone going through it. Hopefully, in time, you'll look back and it won't hurt so much or maybe not at all. I know its all very hard to make sense of and you are very very hurt. Really take care of yourself pet.
xx

smellybiker

HEARTBROKEN:( wrote: »

Thats not what happened, he contacted me and told me he thinks he wants me back and asked how i felt about him, i told him i still loved him and he said he needed to think.

Then nothing more was said about it and all of a sudden he has a few gf

my ex has done this a few times and if you don't cut contact, it will happen you again and again.

when my ex did it, i thought it was to hurt me and get me back but now, looking back, i don't think that was the case. he was confused - he loved me and wanted me back - the intimacy, the loss of lonelieness, the familiarity. however, the arguments stuck in his head, the constant fighting and it was these that won through in the end and made the decision not to take me back. i think your guy is having the same confusion. although he is with other girls, yeah it's nasty but his thinking is why not have a bit of fun while he makes his mind up about you.

i hung out waiting by the fon for my bf to make a decision - i'm not sure how much time i wasted - but it was alot more than i should have spent over one guy...my advice is to move on with your life. don't get sucked into his indecisiveness - give him an ultimatum - if you want me, take me now, if not, don't contact me again!! it'll be the hardest text you can send - to tell him never to contact you again - and you'll cry alot when sending it - but you need to do it - for yourself!!!