Apocalypse

nyarlothothep

The Mayan calendar predicts the end of the world in 2012. The Western economy is in decline. China is emerging as a world superpower. Muslims are pissed. Global society has arrived. Do you think theres some catastrophic war around the corner?

Are ghosts time travellers from the future who pretend their ghosts so they don't violate the temporal prime directive?

Ciaran500

WTF does the last sentence have to do with everything

Gurgle

nyarlothothep wrote: »

Do you think theres some catastrophic war around the corner?

Theres always a catastrophic war around the corner.

nyarlothothep wrote: »

Are ghosts time travellers from the future who pretend their ghosts so they don't violate the temporal prime directive?

No, ghosts are figments of your imagination.

GhostInTheRuins

nyarlothothep wrote: »

The Mayan calendar predicts the end of the world in 2012. The Western economy is in decline. China is emerging as a world superpower. Muslims are pissed. Global society has arrived. Do you think theres some catastrophic war around the corner?

No

nyarlothothep wrote: »

Are ghosts time travellers from the future who pretend their ghosts so they don't violate the temporal prime directive?

wtf? There's no such thing as ghosts. or time travelers.

nyarlothothep

There'll be a mad max style apocalypse with demons in 2012 you can count on it.

Ghosts exist! People see them and time travellers exist because in the future humanity will have reached a level of technologial sophistication venture into the past or future. They disguise themselves as aliens to monitor us in the pre apocalypse era.

GhostInTheRuins

nyarlothothep wrote: »

Ghosts exist! People see them and time travellers exist because in the future humanity will have reached a level of technologial sophistication venture into the past or future. They disguise themselves as aliens to monitor us in the pre apocalypse era.

Why would they disguise themselves as ghosts to monitor us? Surely their results wouldn't be great from the castles, mansions and graveyards that "people see them" in, no?

nyarlothothep

Theyre invisible most of the time. They want to weave a spirituality into the human timeline so that we can fight the demons in the final battle in 2012. People can choose to believe in ghosts.

They also need to power down their invisibility cloaks sometimes so they go to the nearest mansion or graveyard and pretend they're ghosts. I know this because I wrote a letter to the future asking for an xbox 360 when they'll be dirt cheap and I got one from a temporal renegade who wants to bring down the project.

Caoimhín

nyarlothothep wrote: »

Theyre invisible most of the time. They want to weave a spirituality into the human timeline so that we can fight the demons in the final battle in 2012. People can choose to believe in ghosts.

They also need to power down their invisibility cloaks sometimes so they go to the nearest mansion or graveyard and pretend they're ghosts. I know this because I wrote a letter to the future asking for an xbox 360 when they'll be dirt cheap and I got one from a temporal renegade who wants to bring down the project.

Quite.
And the neighbours cat is the ring leader presumably?

nyarlothothep

Im serious, in 2012 there is going to be a catastrophic war, the clues are already here now, this is like Twelve Monkeys except its real!

Caoimhín

well then, you have 4 years to enjoy yourself and spend any money you have. Indeed why not borrow a few 100k and go totally mad since the banks wont exist after the Apocalypse/Neighbours cat puts an end to the world.

nyarlothothep

You'll be eating your own words in 2012 I guarantee you

jd83

ah i love some of the crap people post here its funny, someone get the op a tin foil hat

Caoimhín

nyarlothothep wrote: »

You'll be eating your own words in 2012 I guarantee you

Indeed.

DarkJager

I think the whole idea of an Apocalypse with demons and other suitably scary sh1t is a load of bollix tbh. 2012 will come and go just like every other year the world was predicted to end, nothing to see here, move along.

Caoimhín

rory1983 wrote: »

ah i love some of the crap people post here its funny, someone get the op a tin foil hat

Poor fellow may be in need of serious mental health care.

nyarlothothep

The demon lords (they're not actually demons but higher dimensional aliens who want to destroy mankind) are leading us on the path to obliteration. I have evidence and will post it up here. But I have to go for now, the forces of darkness are approaching, I must move to a safer location. They dont want the truth to get out!

Caoimhín

Poor chap.

Profiler

nyarlothothep wrote: »

The demon lords (they're not actually demons but higher dimensional aliens who want to destroy mankind) are leading us on the path to obliteration. I have evidence and will post it up here. But I have to go for now, the forces of darkness are approaching, I must move to a safer location. They dont want the truth to get out!

:mad:

No we don't, I've warned you before about letting the secrets out. As Demon Lord most high I shall be dispatching my most loyal troop of flying monkey assassins to deal with you.

Moving to your safer location, the garden shed lined with tin foil and egg boxes, will be no defense...

FLY MY PRETTIES FLY...

Mahatma coat

Wait, AH now, hang on a sec.

There are temporal Renegades handin out free XBoxes


I wants me some in on this.



Dear mr Future Renegade,

if ya could please see yer way to sendin me back a few Lazer guns and whatever sort of flyin tank ye may have invented, heck, hows about ya just give me one a them time travel machines and I'll take care of the rest meself, in preparation for this 2012 holocaust


Yours muchly in anticipation

Podge

Gurgle

Profiler wrote: »

As Demon Lord most high I shall be dispatching my most loyal troop of flying monkey assassins to deal with you...

FLY MY PRETTIES FLY...

em, sorry boss thats going to be a problem.
Several of the monkeys have bird flu & the rest are looking a bit shifty.

Can we go with the big slavering hell-hounds on this one?
I know they're a bit old fashioned but they're the best we have available at the moment.

Profiler

Gurgle wrote: »

em, sorry boss thats going to be a problem.
Several of the monkeys have bird flu & the rest are looking a bit shifty.

WHAT? Damn and blast it to hell ... have the research team burnt at the stake...

Gurgle wrote: »

Can we go with the big slavering hell-hounds on this one? I know they're a bit old fashioned but they're the best we have available at the moment.

:rolleyes: you and your big slavering hounds... I'm sick and bloody tired of the Anti flying monkeys pro slavering hounds agenda on this place... :mad: fine... if they are all we have then send them...

Sigh... mutter.... bloody humans holding me back... mutter mumble gripe... I'm a blinkin Demon Lord... mutter... I should have an Army at my disposal... :mad::( ...
effin budget cut backs...

nyarlothothep

Now that I'm safe I can get the truth out to the world

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VrnKYFSMAo

heres a transcript of a letter I obtained from the future

Dear Judith,

Our plans are almost complete, I am travelling back in time to give an Xbox 360 to one of our ancestors. No doubt this will constitute another blow to The Project. We can defeat them, we can bring eternal darkness to humanity.

I will tell him everything, about the travellers, the cover up and the events that will soon visit his people in 2012. Rest assured once the new American president is elected global unification will be inevitable, so sayeth the old ones of the ancient prophecy. The cycle will be completed and we are part of it, we must play our unholy roles, to ensure in part that all races and creeds are united. Then we will welcome the coming of our dark lord as he reigns in chaos and terror over humanity for a thousands years of night. But remember, for our plans must suceed you must continue to disrupt the project. I will return. Oh and I've included the theory for time travel here, just in case this message is intercepted by anyone from 1998.

ds^2= - c^2 dt^2 + dl^2 + (k^2 + l^2)(d \theta^2 + \sin^2 \theta \, d\phi^2)

[message cuts off at this point, possibly due to alteration of the timeline by project spies as they don't want the equations for time travel to be leaked into the past!]

....
Take care Judith, may the Dark One be with you

Sincerely
Matthew Dedalus

and this, a picture of a temporal matrix with a demon lord trying to breach into our universe, they were trying to attack me

Profiler

that's a fake :rolleyes:

our temporal matrix's turn green when they interact with your atmosphere, everyone knows that

toiletduck

So time travellers are 360 fanboys?? :eek:

nyarlothothep

hello my fellow believers, I've just escaped from the clutches of an evil succubus, she ensnared me with her demonic charms and forced me to have sex with her, but punished me because she was displeased. I spent all last night in a dungeon but escaped, so now I can tell what I've learned. I am the temporal renegade from the future! Thats what the succubus told me, Im going to bring about the apocalypse by sending back an xbox360 to myself!!!, How I become this dastardly agent of darkness I do not know, but I must fight the future!!!!

Kernel

Cuckoos nest is thataway.

---

>

Mahatma coat

ah so you asked yerself to buy yerself an X-box, that makes sense, no really it does, this is a perfectly cromulent thread

Nerin

this thread is full of win

???

To actually answer the guy's initial question...

The entire thing is based on a false premise, that the end of the calender signified the end of the world. It didn't. That is a modern invention, the Mayans never ever wrote anything about the end of the world in 2012!

The Mayans used to calenders, a short yearly (ish) one and a long astronomically based one. They are just calenders! Most of the calenders found have just the 13 bak'tuns on them though ones with 'future dates' have also been recorded. It's like our yearly calender, 99% of them show 12 months! It doesn't mean when you turn the last page the world ends!!!

That is pretty much what it comes down to, that some morons make the assumption that because the Mayan Calender is ending the world is ending. Bit of a leap? Most likely outcome if the Mayans had still been around? Big millenium style piss up and they'd have to produce next years calender!!!

Mahatma coat

I think a lot of this has to do with the fact that many ancient civilisations were aware of the 'procession' of the constelations (that being the bit where they move backwards by one 'symbol' every 2000 odd years, this mayan Calender is probably givin their date for the procession to Aquarius.

bible equates the same thing with regard timelines

dunno where twins (gemini) come into it, maybe Cain and Abel

but, timeline ish

1) moses' people worship golden Bull (Taurus)
2) moses sez now we worship the Ram (Aries)
3) along comes the Late JC and starts shoitin on about fish (pisces)
4) the musical hair is released singin about, yes you guessed it (Aquarius)

???

Sorry what does Maya have to with the bible? Or are you taking the piss? I'm totally confused!!!