Best pick up lines

BrowneusMaximus

Prob been done before ....but whats the best pic up lines u heard.

____________

CarefulNow

Does this smell like Chloroform to you?

BrowneusMaximus

walk up to girl say if u were a pirate would u have your parrot on this shoulder (put your hand on her shoulder the one closest 2 you) or this shoulder (ur arm is now around her shoulders)

Peared

"The chopper's waiting out back"

Kold

"Have you seen the search function in this forum? If so you might've seen this topic come up about 2 weeks ago."

The Queen

Kold wrote: »

"Have you seen the search function in this forum? If so you might've seen this topic come up about 2 weeks ago."

I'm so hot for you right now.

"I lost my phone number, can I borrow yours?"

Profiler

"Hello, I'm <tell her your name>,"

best line ever

BrowneusMaximus

"your Hot"

Tak3n

"Bless you my child"

Jonathan

"Give us a shot of that tongue ring there will ya?"

Adam

Suck me off?

At least if it works you know it's going somewhere.

The Walsho

Lick your fingertip and touch her with it - "Let's get you home outta those wet clothes"

Mirror

Mirror wrote: »

Suck me off?

At least if it works you know it's going somewhere.

Are you sporting any minor injuries from Paddys weekend.
I think I met you....

Wacker

"I must say, that top looks most becoming on you. And if it were me on you, I'd be coming too."

tolosenc

"Me and my mate are having this bet. I say it's impossible to touch your elbows together behind your back. Can you?"

vektarman

Kold wrote: »

"Have you seen the search function in this forum? If so you might've seen this topic come up about 2 weeks ago."

I tried that one, she just gave me a blank look.

Volvoboy

''Giz a shot of yer box''
''Will ya come to the bower''
''Do ya have any Irish in ya? NO?! do ya want a bit more Irish in ya!!''
''Whats the diffrence between me and all the other blokes here? im the only one talking to you''*


*Not a good one, have scar to prove.



-VB-

Adam

Moonbaby wrote: »

Are you sporting any minor injuries from Paddys weekend.
I think I met you....

Are you mad woman? It's Paddy's weekend! Mans sole purpose is to get drunk, not to chat up women! You can't chat and swallow at the same time*, thereby getting less drunk. Pfft, you wimminz think you're the centre of attention...




*does not apply to certain porn stars

Ruu_Old

So how big is your post count then*?


Never tried it but I'm sure someone tried it at one of the beers.

Davidius

"Hey babeh, wanna have sex?"

Gummy Panda

Chat up lines... Meh

*drops trousers and does the windmill*

MizzLolly

Not so much a chat up line but I was pushed into a ditch and had three cans of beer thrown over me....


You'll be surprised to hear that we ended up having a relationship.. Aww I miss that fella... :rolleyes:

phantom_lord

they all suck.

Volvoboy

MizzLolly wrote: »

Not so much a chat up line but I was pushed into a ditch and had three cans of beer thrown over me....


You'll be surprised to hear that we ended up having a relationship.. Aww I miss that fella... :rolleyes:

Hmm kinky!!;)

Lockstep

*slap on arse* don't make this rape turn into a murder.

Schism

"Ten tonnes of polar bear"

....

"Breaks the ice doesn't it"


pure gold, feel free to use it

Y2J IS GOD

My name is Gillette because i'm the best a man can get

Pen1987

^^^ its "how much does a polar bear weigh? enough to break the ice... hi Im..."

"Do you know Leona Lewis? Yeah? Whats your favorite song or hers? Oh yeah, mines "bleeding love", seriously, yeah... and give me five minutes alone with ye and I'll have ye bleeding... love."

Jesus Wept

BrowneusMaximus wrote: »

walk up to girl say if u were a pirate would u have your parrot on this shoulder (put your hand on her shoulder the one closest 2 you) or this shoulder (ur arm is now around her shoulders)

Great way to get a restraining order/knee in the nuts tbh.

Lockstep

Can you give me a hand moving something?
What?
One and a half ounces of fluid sperm.


Steve Katz, Neither Here Nor There, Bill Bryson.

deaddonkey

kickoutthejams wrote: »

Can you give me a hand moving something?
What?
One and a half ounces of fluid sperm.


Steve Katz, Neither Here Nor There, Bill Bryson.

ahaha i love bill bryson, he's a genius

sullivk

Him:Excuse me, but I think you've dropped something...

Her:What?

Him:My heart

:rolleyes:

Volvoboy

sullivk wrote: »

Him:Excuse me, but I think you've dropped something...

Her:What?

Him:My heart

:rolleyes:

Isnt that an insult?


-VB-

AckwelFoley

What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.






Am I cute enough yet? Or do you need more to drink?






You know what would look great on you? Me.







.. im blind..Can I read your T shirt in brail?









Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.









I have Skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?







If you were a new sandwich at Mcdonalds, you’de be called McGorgeous

sullivk

Volvoboy wrote: »

Isnt that an insult?


-VB-

Hmmm... possibly!

Marksie

Hi my name's <insert name>

Remember it, you'll be screaming it later

AckwelFoley

Marksie wrote: »

Hi my name's <insert name>

Remember it, you'll be screaming it later

Yea.. to the cops...

"His name was marksie"

timmywex

"lets play army, i'l ly on the ground and you can blow the f*ck outta me"

The Walsho

Wanna go halves on a bastard?

tech77

"You're so hot I forgot my pickup line".

Tanabe

それは天へあなたのタイツまたは階段の梯子であるか。

Jonathan

Tanabe wrote: »

それは天へあなたのタイツまたは階段の梯子であるか。

In english?

KTRIC

Tanabe wrote: »

それは天へあなたのタイツまたは階段の梯子であるか。

Something about the stair way to heaven. My japanesse is a bit rusty.

MizzLolly

Volvoboy wrote: »

Hmm kinky!!;)

It worked though - so if there's any lady you have your eye on just push her into a ditch an pour a few cans on her!

Jesus Wept

Tanabe wrote:

それは天へあなたのタイツまたは階段の梯子であるか。

KTRIC wrote: »

Something about the stair way to heaven. My japanesse is a bit rusty.

Is that a ladder in your tights or a stairway to heaven?

ShayK1

Not exactly pick up lines but funny anyway....

Girls comes to talk to my mate, he turns to her and says "Can't ya see I'm busy drinking??"
She left.....

Another mate was seeing a girl for awhile and kept forgetting here name, she wasn't very happy so he said "Look, from now on I'm just gonna call you Heineken!"

PullMyFinger!

Well there's the always stalwart: "Can I buy you a drink or will I just give you the money?"

Dont think Ive ever used a line before in my life but if I did it'd be along the lines of "Can I stick my penis into your vagina??"

And Id say it with a straight face too

St Bill

Good idea...it's easier to slap a straight face

deise_boi

Overheard this before..

"My name's Barney Rubble and i'm going to make your Bedrock"
I lol'd

Black Swan

Saw a custom chevy pickup with grand lines the other day...

Ballerina

"ill have a pint of budweiser and your number please"

maybe i should ad that i was working in a club at the time...

im ashamed to say it worked....ahh accents you can't resist.he'd been sitting at the bar chatting to me so it wasnt totally random!