Do you have a phobia that seriously affects your life?

a4775

nothing wrote: »

I also suffer from agoraphobia and social phobia, and it affects my life so badly. Because of it I haven't worked in 2 years, I constantly miss college lectures and I have had to repeat so many times due to falling so far behind. It's cut me off from many friends since I can't go to the pub without having a panic attack. It's been a real struggle but I'm coping a lot better with CBT, anti anxiety meds, and plenty of help from college.

i know exactly how you feel and let me tell you, the fact that you can get to college or the pub at all is a really good sign
that and the fact that you can go to therapy too
you have to make sure to keep that up or you will end up a recluse like me
or like what i used to be

i work full time now because i was kinda forced into going for the interview
i hate my job though, and i have hated it since i started
but almost 5 years later im still there because i cant face having to start new someplace else

having to do an interview and meet the new people at work
its not nice having to tell other people that you have dont absolutely nothing over the weekend, no drinking or going anywhere
and having to turn down invitations to nights out isnt nice either
i cant learn to drive, i cant move out to my own place (even if i could afford it), i cant travel, i cant go out at all and even if i could i have nobody to go out with

at least i get to indulge in delicious self pity on a regular basis

a4775

a4775 wrote: »

having to do an interview and meet the new people at work
its not nice having to tell other people that you have done absolutely nothing over the weekend, no drinking or going anywhere
and having to turn down invitations to nights out isnt nice either
i cant learn to drive, i cant move out to my own place (even if i could afford it), i cant travel, i cant go out at all and even if i could i have nobody to go out with

at least i get to indulge in delicious self pity on a regular basis

This is gonna sound bad, but I'm so happy there's someone out there like me, even if it is a minority.


I used to work in Dunnes Stores, and surprisingly, once I got to know the staff (which was incredibly tough)
I had no problem dealing with customers (even though i spent most of my time in the stock room on my own). Yet, the minute i finished work, it would all come flying back to me.

Right now im at a stage where I have been out of a job for a while (started to affect me at work, so i couldn't handle it and walked out) and i have no intention of even looking for another job, solely because I know the thoughts of the interview or meeting new people in the unlikely event i do get the job are just insanely annoying.


I reckon i appear calm outdoors (when i rarely go out, i never, ever went out on a night out or anything though, and i never intend to) but im always very alert of whats going on around me. Who's doing what who is where and what time. Its such a killer. My 20th birthday is the 5th of june (thursday) and my brother/sister etc. keep saying "aw you should do this and that etc". even though i couldnt make it any clearer that i really have no interest, and just want to be left alone.



I've practically lost all but one friend because of it, and thats just because she only texts me a lot and calls around to my house every now and then.

Whenever i have to go somewhere i'll time it so i go at a time when there'll be very few people around (eg. if i have to go to the post office or something i'll go early whilst everyone is at school and work) but yeah... It totally ruins everything.


And i hate being on the dole. I'd love to be able to get up to an anyway near half-decent job and have a few €€ in my pocket each week. Right now Im in debt to the credit union, which will take me a year to clear, and when i clear that loan my brother is going to get married in spain so i have to spend a lot of money to go to that. So not only is it costing me more, i'm absolutely dreading the thoughts of it and have no interest in going at all. sooner im dead the better.


This thread is good though. I never knew of Agoraphobia before. By that I mean I didnt know it was an actual common problem people had.

Trinity

jimpe wrote: »

I find driving very difficult, particularly dual carriageways and motorways, which I have completely avoided for the past year. I can't fly anymore either, because I'm terrified I'll have a panic attack and there's nowhere to escape to.

Ditto. Let me know how you get on.

The Bollox

BigPhil wrote: »

This might sound silly to some people but job interviews are a huge phobia of mine. Okay I know nobody likes going to interviews but I have a stammer so it is 100% times worse for me. It's got to the point where if I am offered an interview I cannot sleep or eat or even think straight for the days building up to it. Then when I go for the interview I am so nervous that I usually can't get a word out. It's like getting dressed up to go and make a fool out of yourself in front of complete strangers! I really despise it.

I have a pretty bad stammer aswell. it doesn't always happen, like I can go for days and not stammer once, but out of nowhere it will strike. it is the most frustrating thing in the world, I know exactly what you mean by knowing exactly what you want to say but just can't and have to think of another word for it.

thankfully in my case it rarely, if ever, pops up in job interviews or other high-pressure situations, mostly it will pop up if I am trying to tell the punchline to a joke or if I think of something witty to say :mad:

I do find however that people acknowledging it helps. the lads I hang around with sometimes rip on me for it, but they know I can take a slagging, and it actually helps me relax around them and so it doesn't pop up as often as it might if I was too self-concious of what they might think (it's kinda hard to describe the frame of mind)

giddybootz wrote:

my fear of helicopters can be annoying....i live in dublin so they are always around. im alot better about it than when i was a child but still its pretty obvious that i have a fear of them so EVERYbody gives me stick about it

dunno if it has a name???!

my mam suffers from this. if she is out in the front or back garden and heard the sound of a helicopter she has to run inside

Fatloss08

i have a anxiety or social phobia

long story short

im from finglas and had a gf from artane ( 4 miles away ) and suddenly i came down with everything , sweats , dizzyness , pins n needles in hands and face , weak , etc etc all i wanted to do was get home asap to a safe place

took me 2 hours getting home , getting bus , walking etc and it it scared me so much that it was 2 or 3 years b4 i got any help ( my own mistake ) i never went on a bus again to artane etc

that was 10 years ago and i still have it , i live in a safe zone and if i go outside it i get all choked up and difficult to breath etc

went to numerous people etc and was told i know more about my condition than most , i know exactly whats happening and what to do , but just cant seem to get hold of it and beat it

i have a pack called the linden method and its class and a must for people with a phobia

watna

Fatloss08 wrote: »

i have a anxiety or social phobia

long story short

im from finglas and had a gf from artane ( 4 miles away ) and suddenly i came down with everything , sweats , dizzyness , pins n needles in hands and face , weak , etc etc all i wanted to do was get home asap to a safe place

took me 2 hours getting home , getting bus , walking etc and it it scared me so much that it was 2 or 3 years b4 i got any help ( my own mistake ) i never went on a bus again to artane etc

that was 10 years ago and i still have it , i live in a safe zone and if i go outside it i get all choked up and difficult to breath etc

went to numerous people etc and was told i know more about my condition than most , i know exactly whats happening and what to do , but just cant seem to get hold of it and beat it

i have a pack called the linden method and its class and a must for people with a phobia

Maybe you could tell us a bit more about the linden method. Sounds really interesting.

Fatloss08

its all common knowledge but phrased to make you understand

like

1) dont research your condition on the net or go the doctor , you have panic disorder and the more you research it the more your keeping it in ur head

2) its like being in a car accident , the longer you leave it to get into a car the harder it is , its just a bad habit thats hard to shake

im not good at giving examples but you'd have to read it

maybe i'll scan it and email it to people who want it , it comes with cd's that you listen to on a daily basis for 20 mins , and doing it long enough it generates new thinking paterns etc


heres the link to the website , just read it and see what u think and make ur own mind up

http://www.thelindenmethod.co.uk/

af_thefragile

I'm scared of the dark. I don't know what its called but i get absolutely terrified when i'm alone in the dark. Though if there's someone with me, i can manage through the creepiest of places, but alone, i can't even imagine how i can survive in the dark!

nothing

@ Fatloss08, KKV, a4775 - it's a hard life to lead.

a4775 - I have all those can'ts too, it's hard enough to get to the shops like a normal person. I had the pressure of not knowing if I was going to have to move this year, and it almost tipped me over the edge just thinking about it.

KKV - I'm on disability and I know what you mean about money, it sucks just living off week to week, not being able to splash out on anything. I do the same when I have to go somewhere, pick the time when it's least busy, and if I can avoid it at all. I shop online, bank online, live my whole life from the sofa.

Fatloss08 - the worst times, and unfortunately for me, most likely times to get a panic attack is when I'm not home, and the further I am, the worse the attack is.

I'm going up to see my nana tomorrow, 2 bus journeys of over an hour each, but I have to go because I've avoided it for months now, always having one excuse or another.

Jumpy

I had a major problem at school due to the inability to stand someone writing with chalk on a blackboard.
I did very badly in classes with a blackboard and exceptionally well in classes with a whiteboard. People wouldnt believe me when I said I couldnt stand chalk as to why I may have done badly in some classes. The teacher considered me actually quite dumb due to my test scores.
However when I did a (written!) test to get into a selective high school I came in the top 1% of statewide test takers and was offered a choice out of any of them.

I wonder how long its going to be until teachers use Powerpoint in their classrooms.

stressed out

For all the people suffering with Social Phobia or Agoraphobia, please get help from a CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapist). I know this may be hard for you but do it like your life depends on it, because ultimately it does. Isolating yourself like this is unhealthy and can lead to depression and suicide.

I had social phobia. I got help. It was hard, but just by putting a name to what I was feeling ('normalising' it as a cousellor told me) helped.
CBT allows you to face your fears gradually, by taking small steps and gaining confidence and hopefully conquering your fear.
Right now I would say I am more outgoing than I ever was. I have travelled on my own, moved to another country on my own, done class presentations, etc. I would not be super-confident but I get by. I still have days when I 'avoid' certain situations but I try to do these things because in the end it will be good for my personal development and well-being.

So please get help because I know how easy it is to shut yourself away from the world and 'avoid' life. And I hope I'm not upsetting anyone by telling them to 'change their lives' because change is hard but with help it can turn your world around.

Please get help - you only live once and the world is a wonderful place Go out and enjoy it!

ASIL1983

I have a serious fear of things that make loud sudden noises- fireworks, balloons, party poppers, dogs suddenly barking,thunder, alarms... Its called Ligyrophobia. I have driven my boyfriend and family mad trying to avoid these things my whole life. Im already dreading Halloween, i only really leave the house around halloween to go to work. I dread when i have children and they want to have ballons,party poppers, fireworks etc

Frankie Lee

I have a terrible fear of onions, can't go near them, can't eat at the same table as some one else eating them, smell of them makes me feel sick.:(

nirelandguy

I have social phobia, Have done since I settled down with my GF some 7-8 years ago.

smelltheglove

What is the story with this social phobia a lot of people have? I hate meeting new people and I hate groups, I wear glasses and I could never go out without glasses or contacts for fear of someone looking at me and me not knowing!

Hubbie thinks I'm weird!

I have a huge phobia of the dark, I mean I would sob uncontrolablly if locked in a dark room, I'd probably faint, I also have a huge fear of aliens:eek: and gohsots / spirits, and psychos, I'm always afraid new people I meet are psycho maniacs just waiting to do something! Strange!

j0605

Probably sounds weird but i suffer badly from Coulrophobia- Fear of clowns. I even have constand nightmares about them which wake me and im afraid to go back to sleep, even ronnald McDonnald came to the opening of a new resturant near me house so I stayed in all weekend in case i dumped into him.

Ruthless26

Hi, i am afraid of crowds of people. im afraid of social situations, any social situation. and its affecting my life. im afraid to go out and try and make friends. i dont know how to make friends. i dont know what to do about it. i feel trapped and isolated. does anyone have any advice?

johanz

Ruthless26 wrote: »

Hi, i am afraid of crowds of people. im afraid of social situations, any social situation. and its affecting my life. im afraid to go out and try and make friends. i dont know how to make friends. i dont know what to do about it. i feel trapped and isolated. does anyone have any advice?

Holy s*** we totally should be friends.
I am very antisocial too.
A "nerd" if you might.

HereNorThere

It is with much bravery that I am admitting this cause it is a really embarrasing fear. But it effects my life tremendously. There is a name for it but I can't remember it. I have the fear that I smell bad. I am told by everyone I ask (and believe me, it's many) that I do not smell bad. Yet I never believe them. My record is 5 showers in one day. I very often ask doctors, nurses, people on the street, etc, if they notice any odor coming from me. I've even made 2 separate dr appointments to discuss my odor. When I told one my daily hygeine routine he called it excessive and gave me a prescription for my nerves.
On bad days I have to shower everytime I use the toilet.


This phobia effects my life BIG TIME.
I didn't go to many of my daughter's school activities because of the imaginary embarrasment (or is it??) I spend tons of money on soaps, body sprays, expensive detergents, fabric softeners, air fresheners, scented candles, body detoxifying pills, and enemas, as well as have gone on numerous cleansing fasts. I sleep with my window open even on the coldest of winter nights to allow in the fresh air. I keep all my clothes in plastic bags, not the closet or dresser, so as to not absorb the bad odor I think is always in my house. I use to (but not anymore-I guess I'm getting a little better) wash my outfit for the day so as to be the freshest as posssible, and as soon as I threw it on would run out the door into the fresh air.....


I am told I wear way too much perfume (what I do to cover the odor), and that when people wave the air in front of them when I walk by it is because of that. But I think it's cause I smell so I just spray more on only to make it worse.

I think it stems from the fact that I was sexually abused as a child, so I never really actually feel clean. That's just my theory anyway.

SparrowTown

LadyJ wrote: »

Apparently a lot of people have the light bulb fear. No name that I can find, though my search wasn't too thorough. Electrophobia is the fear of electricity though but that was the nearest I found.

I knew a man who would not eat ice cream from a fridge in case there would be electricity on it, no joke

Paddy Fields

jph100 wrote: »

yeah ive a phobia of cats+dogs which makes it difficult walkin anywhere but i get through it by goin to the oppoiste side of the road

I just have the dog phobia, I believe it is called Cynophobia. I was attacked as one when I was a kid so that is really where it began. To make it worse I live in north eastern Thailand where packs of Soi (street) dogs roam around. They are typically starved, diseased and crazy from the heat. However I will avoid ANY dog. I can walk up my street and literally have an elephant walk towards me, I will casually walk around him but if I happen across a small dog asleep outside a house I will cross the street.

A tourist attraction here is to pose with a tiger in one of the tiger zoos. It wouldn't cost me a thought as everyone does it but if I see a Jack Russell I will cross the street.

Johnny Bitte

Phobia of being trapped, anywhere.

Bus, rain airplane, meetings, in traffic, in crowds, even when I have a drink I feel it it cause I can't jump in the car!
Severe anxiety when I attempts anything like it.
Completely changed my life for the past 10 years.:(

gypsy_rose

I'm just so afraid of sleeping in a house by myself, some are worse than others, but being in my dad's house in Mayo at night makes me absolutely terrified, I stay up drinking and watching the TV, listening out for any little sound. The last time I stayed there alone I vowed to never do it again after one of the lights went out in the room I was in at about 2 in the morning! Never been so freaked out

Artur Foden

I have school phobia and it has been a problem throughout my entire life, now finally turning 18 this month and will have given up school for good. I dont pretend it is as bad as phobias can be because I can still function perfectly well around people and it doesn't make me physically sick. But still, it made my childhood needlessly traumatic

polka dot

Papyrophobia anyone? (fear of paper)

Dr conrad murray

i have a phobia of the number 3 and anything that is in 3,s
for example if there was 3 items on a table i would have to remove 1 or add 1
also i have a phobia of anything that is not layed flat for example a knife turned on its edge would realy get to me.
also get very nevous when i sense someone walking closely behind me.

rustopher

Mine is being trapped- claustrophobic and this seriously effects my life if I want to feel free to do the things I enjoy. I haven't taken a proper holiday in 10 yrs as I wont fly. I had a panic attack on the plane and on a bus. I started to panic driving on d motorway and had to pull in to catch my breath, it was pouring down and my car was fogging up, and this made it worse. I panic in crowds and if I go to the cinema I need to sit on the end seat so I have easy access.

A friend is asking me to take the plunge and fly to Portugal but it freaks me out when I think about it, yet will annoy me if i don't.... any idea how I can get through this?? I have managed short flight recently so am trying to stretch it a bit. The problem is I will be dreading it instead of looking forward to it... and thats half the fun or in this case problem!

kyain

polka dot wrote: »

Papyrophobia anyone? (fear of paper)

I think my friend has it. He ask to remove tissue on the table when we eat at the restaurant. And he ask to remove all books, tissue, car service hanging etc when we driving a car. He can't touch money also. He can't even stand with my bag since I got tissue in it.

Anyone has the same problem? Can you share your daily life with no paper in it???

Thanks

old_aussie

I have Ritchie Valen's syndrome

Kiva.D

My phobia is aeronautical in nature. It's not the flying I have an issue with, it's the crash-landing.