Managers

isyoumad?

Anyone any experience with dealing with a bastard of a manager.

Just after starting a graduate program and my manager has called me slow now twice within the last few months. She then gives out about my body language in our 1:1 meetings, that I come across as defensive and abrupt.

Really like the work I do, but my manager is really getting me down about it.

Karoma

Do you want helpful / serious answers or AH answers?
AH scripted response: Get (her) laid, get drunk, and/or get stoned together.
AH scripted response: Maybe you are slow?
AH scripted response: Maybe it's them immigints showing you up.

Owen

Well, first of all, I hope you're not in the Graduate Program with Gallop marketing, if you are, do a search on boards for those 'companies' any get out. Secondly, there is no excuse for your Manager's behaviour, even if he is correct. A good Manager should take you to one side, explain what you're doing wrong, and give you the opportunity to correct it. Your one, just sounds like he's bordering on bullying in the workplace.

My advice? If there's someone above him, approach them calmly, and explain your situation. Otherwise, if he's top of the food chain, get out. There's plenty of other jobs out there.

star-pants

Called you slow as in 'dunce' or slow as in you're going slow with work?
Because if it's the former then that's a bit out of line.

She might be mentioning that your body language indicates you're defensive etc, and perhaps is trying to find out why you're feeling that way?

isyoumad?

Karoma wrote: »

Do you want helpful / serious answers or AH answers?
AH scripted response: Get (her) laid, get drunk, and/or get stoned together.
AH scripted response: Maybe you are slow?
AH scripted response: Maybe it's them immigints showing you up.

Era anything at all. Stories, advice I don't mind. I'm not the brightest graduate in the program, but I wouldn't say I'm that bad that results in her calling me slow

isyoumad?

In a financial company in the IT department. Called me slow as in stupid. Says my work is very good on projects, but 'you're kinda slow really aren't you'. No wonder I'm defensive.
Now I don't mind criticism, if it's helpful and something I'm doing wrong I'd like to know to take measures, but just think that being called slow is a bit far

Dord

You've just got to pork her, that'll shut her up!

isyoumad?

Joe Robot wrote: »

You've just got to pork her, that'll shut her up!

She's rough out though, Christmas party tomorrow night. Would have to be fairly hammered to even consider

Karoma

isyoumad? wrote: »

In a financial company in the IT department. Called me slow as in stupid. Says my work is very good on projects, but 'you're kinda slow really aren't you'. No wonder I'm defensive.
Now I don't mind criticism, if it's helpful and something I'm doing wrong I'd like to know to take measures, but just think that being called slow is a bit far

The next time that she says it, confront her (in a non-aggressive manner - well, try) and ask her to explain the remark. Don't let her brush it off either. Make her explain.

aidan_walsh

Karoma wrote: »

The next time that she says it, confront her (in a non-aggressive manner - well, try) and ask her to explain the remark. Don't let her brush it off either. Make her explain.

And then complain to her manager.

Rob_l

Bring a sword to work!
problem solved

RxQueen

pfffft managers , mise thinks it the people you work with one needs to be looking out for imo..


*note this not included my worike mates that use boards.ie ... phew covered myself there!*

Pherekydes

isyoumad? wrote: »

...but just think that being called slow is a bit far

Make a written complaint. See who's defensive then!

Karoma

aidan_walsh wrote: »

And then complain to her manager.

Aye. If needs be. One step at a time though.

Jigsaw

isyoumad? wrote: »

She's rough out though, Christmas party tomorrow night. Would have to be fairly hammered to even consider

Buy a pile of laxatives and put them in her drink tomorrow night. Watch and laugh as the crap flies out of her ar5e like a flock of starlings. That'll learn her.

isyoumad?

Karoma wrote: »

The next time that she says it, confront her (in a non-aggressive manner - well, try) and ask her to explain the remark. Don't let her brush it off either. Make her explain.

Cool thanks.

Already been put into my review for this year anyway.

Wompa1

isyoumad? wrote: »

In a financial company in the IT department. Called me slow as in stupid. Says my work is very good on projects, but 'you're kinda slow really aren't you'. No wonder I'm defensive.
Now I don't mind criticism, if it's helpful and something I'm doing wrong I'd like to know to take measures, but just think that being called slow is a bit far

Maybe she was joking around and you were to slow to realise it?

aidan_walsh

Karoma wrote: »

Aye. If needs be. One step at a time though.

Oh, of course. I didn't mean to do it immediately, but rather if it keeps up. There should be no call for that type of thing, especially if its phrased as the OP suggests. Its nothing more than workplace bullying.

isyoumad?

isyoumad? wrote: »

She then gives out about my body language in our 1:1 meetings, that I come across as defensive and abrupt.

Did you stick your middle finger up at her or give her the backwards 'V' sign?

Terry

She totally wants you.

ScumLord

Maybe she just see's the potential in you and is pushing you harder than anyone else to make you the best damn whatever you do that ever did it.

If she says your defensive again get offensive and run around the office shouting who's slow now cuntytits. Then sue the company for making you mental. It's all in my new book, available in all piss poor book shops.

shrapnel222

lol 1040 and already posting on boards. Of course you're slow, you're on ze internet all day doing fcuk all work!!!:D

biko

Go postal!*

*don't go postal!

arybvtcw0eolkf

Slow coach wrote: »

Make a written complaint.

Eh, HELLO, I mean ... HELLO ... He's slow :rolleyes:

OP, seriously I'd nail her on those 'your slow' comments. Get her to commit herself and nail the bitch/chap.

Best of luck, I've had to work under some right bastards, they can really get you down.

ejmaztec

She probably has severe psychological problems associated with herpes and the OP probably bears a striking resemblance to the one who caused it.

Pherekydes

Mairt wrote: »

Eh, HELLO, I mean ... HELLO ... He's slow :rolleyes:

Yeah, so am I.

marcsignal

What's the deal with female managers, and male subordinates ? This is the 3rd post I've read, relating to such a matter involving a female manager in the last month or so.
I had a similar experience with a female manager in a car hire firm I worked for about 10yrs ago. She was useless, but a family friend of the boss, and there was no point going over her head, so I was f*cked either way.
I wanted to really f*ck her over, so coming up to peak time in the summer, I just worked like a bollix for 4 weeks flat, and brought in as many bookings as I could, and then left, leaving her with the can to carry. Dropping her right in the sh*t was sweet.

isyoumad?

Mairt wrote: »

Eh, HELLO, I mean ... HELLO ... He's slow :rolleyes:

OP, seriously I'd nail her on those 'your slow' comments. Get her to commit herself and nail the bitch/chap.

Best of luck, I've had to work under some right bastards, they can really get you down.

I'm going to demonstrate some of my slowness here and ask who / what is OP?

Was sitting at my desk one day, kind of share same cubicle space. But backs are to each other, had a cold and sneezed a couple times. She turns around and said to me not to sneeze in her direction because she doesn't want to catch the germs I have. She's great

Karoma

"What would Terry Tate do?"

aidan_walsh

isyoumad? wrote:

who / what is OP?

Original Poster, i.e. you.

isyoumad?

aidan_walsh wrote: »

Original Poster, i.e. you.

Ah right, makes sense now.

Another 9 months here and I'm gone. Counting down the months

arybvtcw0eolkf

Karoma wrote: »

"What would Terry Tate do?"

Now there's slow if ever there was slow.

But I don't think he'd cough and sneeze all over ya like the OP does in work.

growler

shrapnel222 wrote: »

lol 1040 and already posting on boards. Of course you're slow, you're on ze internet all day doing fcuk all work!!!:D

what he said

work faster and stop your idle studenty dossing about, welcome to the real world, if you're that slow you'll get the boot anyway.

why not ask her the next time when a project id due to be finished by and make sure you get it done on time !

Karoma

Mairt wrote: »

Now there's slow if ever there was slow.

But I don't think he'd cough and sneeze all over ya like the OP does in work.

What do you mean?.


I gave a smart answer, a genuine answer, and now I'm back to smart arse mode...We knew it couldn't last, didn't we?.

isyoumad?

growler wrote: »

what he said

work faster and stop your idle studenty dossing about, welcome to the real world, if you're that slow you'll get the boot anyway.

why not ask her the next time when a project id due to be finished by and make sure you get it done on time !

Not slow work wise, I get everything in on time, usually before it. She's nothing bad to say about my work, got praise there. Just called slow in the intellectual sense

growler

organise a pub quiz, bribe the quizmaster to give you an advance copy of the questions, make sure teh manager is on your team, ensure the questions are incredibly hard and make her rethink her lowly opinion of your intellect by quickly answering questions on particle physics, obscure poetry, advanced technology, burmese tribal customs and the geography of the bolivian interior.

Problem solved.

you could always poke her afterwards too.

Kur4mA

Just say the following:

"I may be a little slow, but you're a cunt."

Then get a black marker and draw glasses around her eyes, a moustache under her nose and walk off.

thebman

Ask her to explain what she means next time and find out how quickly she thinks

MOH

Next time she calls you slow, explain that you're flattered but not really interested.

If she looks confused, explain that 'slow' is the new slang for 'I really fancy you'.

Disclaimer: Of course, it could backfire, if she actually does.

[edit]
That's bizarre, I just saw that slang terms thread now. For added legitimacy, you could post a new definition of slow in that thread, and then refer her to it next time she calls you slow. But then she might find this one, so maybe not.

Kipperhell

I once referred to myself as being slow and was reprimanded!

Me:" I know you are not slow like me and should be able to handle this easily"

The guy was a college graduate who had apparently been working with SQL the entire time. While I had only recently started using it for complex searches. So in theory he should have been much quicker.

He reported me to the MD for abusing him. I explained what I said and the MD said you can't talk to people like that because they could take offence. There was no question I said anything other than what I have stated.

The guy was always nervous of his work and ultra defensive. I eventually said I thought he was unable to do the job and said he needed a lot of hand holding. As he had made a complaint about me I was seen as the issue > left shortly afterwards and they guy was fired about a month later for gross incompetence.

OP you certainly should make a complaint it could really work out for you

isyoumad?

Well an update to this thread.

Was out tonight with my project customers. In the pub, big enough group of us. My manager starts harping on about the degree I did in college, how it was useless, not relevant to the field I'm in and generally the graduates out of it are overrated. Then she stops, and just stares at me. So naturally, everyone looks over to see what my reaction is. Pretty much didn't know what to do, or even say. And didn't want to make a scene in front of the customers, some of whom are fairly high up in the organisation. What kind of manager acts like this?

Thinking of going to HR over this now, don't know if it'll be of any help of not.

Suggestions or opinions to what I can do next?

Sangre

rape her.

isyoumad?

Sangre wrote: »

rape her.

Might leave that as a last resort. Thanks for input

bronte

honestly? I would report her....that was way out of line.

buckfast4me

Sangre wrote: »

rape her.

+1

isyoumad?

bronte wrote: »

honestly? I would report her....that was way out of line.

Have 6 more months with her, with no way of being transferred. Don't know if it's worth my while reporting her with the possibility of things getting worse, or just riding it out and counting down my time until I'm gone from this division

bronte

I know what you mean..it's not the best situation to be in, however if you find it unbearable, reporting her may be the only thing to do.
She's being very unprofessional.
You could also say that 'you don't appreciate her comments' to her .
You'd be surprised how quickly she could back down if you say that.
Might take the wind out of her sails , so to speak!

Terry

If you're still having trouble and want proper advice, I suggest taking this up in the Work & Jobs forum.

razorblunt

Come on lad you've got another 6 months of possible torture ahead of you, speak up now, otherwise you risk being viewed as a pushover. What's she going to say about you when you go looking for a transfer?


I'm still in college so havent gone working full time yet, but one of my part time jobs was in a sports shop that my uncle was involved in, my manager used to tell people to be careful of my as i tell him everything that goes on. The lads at the time knew it was bull, but the newbies would take weeks of convincing otherwise. Handed in my resignation to HR instead of to her and told them why.

She was a crazy bat though, she used to alwayslock her office door, she passed out one day in there and we couldnt get into her!

isyoumad?

razorblunt wrote: »

Come on lad you've got another 6 months of possible torture ahead of you, speak up now, otherwise you risk being viewed as a pushover. What's she going to say about you when you go looking for a transfer?

She's no choice about my transfer, already been decided long before I came into this graduate program. I'm gone anyway come September, so will never have to put up with her again.



How do you get a thread transferred into Work & Jobs forum?

knird evol

You can either
1. Smile at her abuse, and lick up to her, and work realy hard and maybe maybe not get a good reference after six difficult months.
2. Tell her and the company to go fvck themselves. and take your chances.

make up your mind.