Condom disposal

LegacyUser

It's been so long since I've been with a woman, it's beginning to scare me. I had sex on a few occasions in college, but from there the trail runs cold, and we're talking just over a decade now. Like I say, really bad.

But now, maybe the planets are in the right alignment or some such muck, and I have my eye on someone and I think she's got her eye on me.

Running through all the scenarios in my mind, so I'm prepared, I've thought of where I'd go with her for a drink, maybe for dinner if we get to a second date, and bought the johnnies, since it would be wildly irresponsible not to be prepared if the best came to the best, so to speak, after a few dates.

A question though: what's the appropriate way of getting rid of a used condom? Do I wrap it in tissue and lash it down the jacks, or is that a serious environmental no-no? Should I fire it in the bin? Won't it smell?

I know there are people out there now bursting their sh1te reading this, but it's a real stumper for me and I want to at least give the impression that I have SOME idea of what I'm doing if we end up together. I honestly can't remember what my two conquests and I did with our used johnnies back in college, but I fear that disposal was, shall we say, the woman's job!

Nevyn

It should be check to make sure that it has not torn or burst and then wrapped in tissue and put in the bin.

http://www.durex.com/uk/needtoknow/howtouseacondom.asp

IANAL (hullaballoo's test a/c)

Snake-warmer wrote:

I know there are people out there now bursting their sh1te reading this, but it's a real stumper for me and I want to at least give the impression that I have SOME idea of what I'm doing if we end up together.

I really hope you're not running along the logic that you'll be able to establish yourself as a stud muffin by means of your condom-disposal techniques. I'd be more intent on making sure you get the basics right first.

dudara

Don't flush it down the loo.

Electric

Yeah definitely put it in the bin!!! No one wants to have to clean up after that!

LegacyUser

IANAL wrote:

I really hope you're not running along the logic that you'll be able to establish yourself as a stud muffin by means of your condom-disposal techniques. I'd be more intent on making sure you get the basics right first.

Hehe, far from it. I'm just trying to make sure I don't inadvertently look like a total spazz, cos as far as I'm concerned, this is part of the basics. I'd have flushed the thing in a tissue paper, and judging by the responses to my original post, that would have been a breach of condom etiquette!

Thanks all for your posts, particularly the Durex one, Thaedydal.

Firetrap

From my experience, used condoms have always ended up in the bin, preferably wrapped in tissue. I don't think there are condom recycling facilities just yet...

cowzerp

Firetrap wrote:

From my experience, used condoms have always ended up in the bin, preferably wrapped in tissue. I don't think there are condom recycling facilities just yet...

Where do you think you get your chewing gum?
i used to tie a knot in them after putting some water in them and they would flush easily.

mcauley

cowzerp wrote:

Where do you think you get your chewing gum?

aaaaaaaaarrrrhhhhhhhhh!!!! :eek:

JuJuYNWA

cowzerp wrote:

i used to tie a knot in them after putting some water in them and they would flush easily.

Hilarious, im gonna try that right now!

I usually just wrap em up in tissue and dump them.

When i was younger i used to just throw thwm on the floor and clean up later, then i had the lucky experience of finding a few month old smelly condoms under my bed...........never again.

projectmayhem

i usually wrap the end around itself, fold it and put it back in the wrapper before putting tissue around it and lumping it in the bin. that way there's no leak, and no one has to know anything other then a lump of tissue is there

azezil

Do they actually sink? I've never flushed them out of fear they wouldn't, plus there was that time I found one of my flatmate's floating in a toilet! >_<

Drift

Don't flush them down the toilet. 8 inches of stringy rubber is not good for the four inch sewer pipe that leaves your building ... nor is it good for the pumps that pump sewage to the treatment plant.

Condoms then have to be removed at the initial screening stage from sewage at the treatment plant because they can't be processed. In some cases this is done mechanically but because of their shape and rubbery nature they sometimes get stuck and have to be removed manually. So don't flush it down the toilet unless you're willing to volunteer to head down to the sewage treatment plant a few times a day and manually remove all the used condoms from the screening grates .....

Put it in the bin - thats what the guy at the sewage treatment plant does when they get there anyway. You're just being a lazy git by flushing it.

Same goes for fag butts btw.

Caliden

I usually just tie it off and put back in the wrapper, then wrap it up in tissue and put in the bin. I'm deathly afraid of a spillage at some stage, it's just waiting to happen!!

sitout

the traditional way of getting rid of a condom was in fact invented in 1434bc by a hungarian hair dresser called horas hillario, basically after one has ejaculated into the rubbery vessel and one has managed to remove it (spillage free) from the now ever deflating penis. one must hold it upside down ensuring all liquid flows to the base, wherapon a knot must then be tied (a variety of knots are premissible horras ,invented many knots in the day but that is not really relevent here). when this task has been completed swallow said item ! yes swallow! aprox 7/8 you will excreate said item and after foraging through your fases you can then dispose of the condom in the privacy of your own home!

Nevyn

sitout unhelpful posts will get ou banned from this forum.
Read the charter and abide by the rules while posting.

Gary ITR

Just throw it out the window of your car when you're finished

Seriously though don't flush it, just putit in some tissue and pop it in the bin or if you're worried about smells etc just put it in tissue then into one of those small little bags and then into the bin.

sitout

Thaedydal wrote:

sitout unhelpful posts will get ou banned from this forum.
Read the charter and abide by the rules while posting.

alright man im only having a laugh! dont bar me i have no life as it is!

Talliesin

Drift wrote:

So don't flush it down the toilet unless you're willing to volunteer to head down to the sewage treatment plant a few times a day and manually remove all the used condoms from the screening grates .....

Given that they can get stuck a lot earlier along the line than the screening gates people who flush condoms can find themselves doing just that.

It'd be bad enough if it gets stuck in the U-bend and it's only after there is some faeces in there that the blockage gets bad enough to stop it. It'd be even worse if you were a guest at the time (in particular, imagine blocking your partner's parents' toilet with a used condom - I don't think Emily Post could think of a polite way to smooth that one over).

WindSock

I once knew a woman in thailand who asked her promiscuous male neighbour for his used condoms each morning. Apparently she used to dring them like a mr freeze. For good power and energy I was told. I myself, stuck to coffee. Maybe you know some nice asian women that would take them off your hands?

Magic Eight Ball

First check it for rips or bursts, tie it in a knot, and sling-shot it out the window.

Ekancone

I think the council say dont flush them down the toilet as they can clog up things. Could be a myth, but i reckon it is better to wrap it and throw it in your sisters face, oops i mean the bin!

Nevyn

The next smart arsed post will get the person banned.

Ekancone

Ah come on, he has gotten good advice too. Whats the harm in an ol'laugh?

cowzerp

JuJuYNWA wrote:

Hilarious, im gonna try that right now!

Did you try it yet?

comongethappy

Seriously, don't flush it - it can clog the toilet and it would be an even more embarrasing experience! Take it off, wrap it in toilet tissue, and throw it in the bin. I doubt she'd think anything of it, as most women wrap sanitary towels or tampons in toilet tissue before binning them. I'm happy your being responsible and practising safe sex Enjoy!

ptashka

Drift wrote:

Don't flush them down the toilet. 8 inches of stringy rubber is not good for the four inch sewer pipe that leaves your building ... nor is it good for the pumps that pump sewage to the treatment plant.

Condoms then have to be removed at the initial screening stage from sewage at the treatment plant because they can't be processed. In some cases this is done mechanically but because of their shape and rubbery nature they sometimes get stuck and have to be removed manually. So don't flush it down the toilet unless you're willing to volunteer to head down to the sewage treatment plant a few times a day and manually remove all the used condoms from the screening grates .....

Put it in the bin - thats what the guy at the sewage treatment plant does when they get there anyway. You're just being a lazy git by flushing it.

Same goes for fag butts btw.

drift, you couldn't get it more right. same goes for ladies hygiene products. aren't there enough signs "DO NOT FLUSH" in the toilets???!!! removing screenings is bad, but blocking pumps is much much worse

uberwolf

if everyone is so concerned about spillage, and is equally appalled by flushing it, here's a compromise. Rinse it out in the sink, then fold, wrap, bin.

Talliesin

uberwolf wrote:

if everyone is so concerned about spillage

Why be concerned about spillage?

Firstly, didn't everyone learn how to tie an overhand knot as a child?

Secondly, there's already likely to be more fluid to clean up from her than from him anyway. If it did spill, get a kleenex and wipe it up already. :rolleyes:

ravima

Binning???

Could som stalker remove it, artifically inseminate themselves, then seek maintenance?

paranoia is frightening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ravima

Binning???

Could som stalker remove it, artifically inseminate themselves, then seek maintenance?

paranoia is frightening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!