Question for the Chicks.

Pighead

Pighead has a question for the chicks.

Pighead innocently walked down to the Spar today to get a pint of milk for his bowl of Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes. It takes approximately 3 minutes to walk to the shop. En route I passed 7 chicks all in various states of skimpy attire, revealing tops, short skirts, tight jeans and see through socks. This resulted in a full on boner by the time I'd made it to the milk fridge in the spar

Why do you wear these flimsy garments so early in the morning?
To gain the attraction of a potential partner? Is it to make yourself feel young, free sexy and confident? Or is it simply to laugh at my funny boner walk on the way back from the shops?

boneless

I hate chickens that dress sexy too. Feathers were good enough in my day.

Nehpets

Pighead wrote:

bowl of Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes.

i approve

Jesus Wept

Pighead wrote:

Pighead has a question for the chicks.

Pighead innocently walked down to the Spar today to get a pint of milk for his bowl of Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes. It takes approximately 3 minutes to walk to the shop. En route I passed 7 chicks all in various states of skimpy attire, revealing tops, short skirts, tight jeans and see through socks. This resulted in a full on boner by the time I'd made it to the milk fridge in the spar

Why do you wear these flimsy garments so early in the morning?
To gain the attraction of a potential partner? Is it to make yourself feel young, free sexy and confident? Or is it simply to laugh at my funny boner walk on the way back from the shops?

Where do you live? I need to relocate.

Dudess

Pighead wrote:

En route I passed 7 chicks

by the time I'd made it to the milk fridge

laugh at my funny boner walk

That's three uses of the first-person. You're still nursing that boner, aren't ya, Piggie?

Pighead

Dudess wrote:

You're still nursing that boner, aren't ya, Piggie?

Sure am my little pork chop, need to get rid of it though as I have to work soon. Just out of interest, what you wearing at the moment babes?

monkeyfudge

Dudess wrote:

That's three uses of the first-person. You're still nursing that boner, aren't ya, Piggie?

Give him a break.. that third person sh*t is hard... I had a go at a first person plural posting style last night and it just ended up confusing everyone.

Dudess

Pighead wrote:

Sure am my little pork chop, need to get rid of it though as I have to work soon. Just out of interest, what you wearing at the moment babes?

If I told you, you'd have to ring in sick.;)

Pighead

monkeyfudge wrote:

Give him a break.. that third person sh*t is hard... I had a go at a first person plural posting style last night and it just ended up confusing everyone.

Pighead agrees with this statement, and so do I.

Anyway back on topic, Pigheads not giving out about chicks who dress skimpily. Far from it, theres restraining orders and night vision goggles in my attic that prove Pigheads a pervert of the lowest order.

But do you think that women who try to attract a man by these mens are gonna increase their chances of attracting a sleazy old so and so. Men who are after one thing and one thing only.

Or perhaps thats what you're looking for. A sleazy bloke who's gonna make you're front bum fart. After all nice blokes are boring aren't they?

Dudess

I just dress like that sometimes because I suppose I enjoy celebrating my femininity or whatever. Dressing sexily (not tackily, mind) is good for the ego - in my case anyway. Nope, I certainly wouldn't be interested in attracting a sleazebag. Sure, it might "arouse" their interest, but they can **** off.
If I knew Pighead was in the neighbourhood though, I'd certainly dress that way purely to impress him. Pighead's hot!

Kinetic^

Pighead wrote:

Men who are after one thing and one thing only.

A nice home cooked meal?

Pighead

Kenny 5 wrote:

A nice home cooked meal?

No, to insert their penis into the hot womans vagina.

Kinetic^

Meh, home cooked meal would be nice though.

AlmightyCushion

monkeyfudge wrote:

Give him a break.. that third person sh*t is hard... I had a go at a first person plural posting style last night and it just ended up confusing everyone.

Yeah I was reading that alright. Everyone thought you were in a cubicle with a bunch of guys.

Steoob

Dudess wrote:

If I told you, you'd have to ring in sick.;)

yowzah

seamus

Women aren't wearing less; You're just getting older and dirtier.

jester77

7 chicks...hmm... I think photo evidence is required, you need to repeat this exercise again tomorrow and bring back the proof!

Rabies

All those chicks and you never got to pluck a single one. Just a quick choke before work

JPA

Kenny 5 wrote:

Meh, home cooked meal would be nice though.

Some day I'd like to wear something that's been ironed. that'd be sweet.

scojones

Three words: Walk of shame.

DarkJager

Simple remedy is to tuck your rigor mortis afflicted snake into the waistband of your pants!

brianthebard

monkeyfudge wrote:

Give him a break.. that third person sh*t is hard... I had a go at a first person plural posting style last night and it just ended up confusing everyone.

Pfft, De Gaulle was able to do the fifth person.

rachums

girls like to dress nice because it makes us feel good! better than looking like ****e! plus who doesnt love attention frm the opposite sex?!

AlmightyCushion

DarkJager wrote:

Simple remedy is to tuck your rigor mortis afflicted snake into the waistband of your pants!

Yeah this is the best way to hide it.

6th

rachums wrote:

girls like to dress nice because it makes us feel good! better than looking like ****e! plus who doesnt love attention frm the opposite sex?!

Gays? ...... no offence to them of course.

NotMe

Maybe they're showing off boobs and legs to take the focus off their arms? :rolleyes:

Anti

It has just come to my attention. They all them 7 wimmin could be whores... plausable?

WindSock

Or maybe the weather is fine.

brianthebard

NotMe wrote:

Maybe they're showing off boobs and legs to take the focus off their arms? :rolleyes:

Mmm, bingo wings....

*flap flap flap*

LadyJ

Men will always perv on you no matter what the hell you wear! I wear whatever the hell I like and then sift through the sleazes to find the decent bloke! Teehee.

Thing is though, it's not like everyone who dresses that way is single. I'm with someone and I still wear skimpy stuff sometimes. Mainly just because I think I look good in it. In fact Piggie, I'm quite disappointed! I've been out with you and have worn short skirts and there wasn't so much as a semi in sight!

*sobs bitterly*

phantom_lord

this thread is worthless w/o pics.

Kinetic^

phantom_lord wrote:

this thread is worthless w/o pics.

Em, I don't want pics of piggy's stiffy thank you very much!!!!

Pighead

LadyJ wrote:

In fact Piggie, I'm quite disappointed! I've been out with you and have worn short skirts and there wasn't so much as a semi in sight!

*sobs bitterly*

Oh but there was, what happened was you were probably looking at Pigheads groin for the bulge. Next time check out the area just above my knee. Now wipe them tears away girl!

Dudess

Piggie, since Beruthiel clearly has no interest, can I be your Boards groupie now?

connundrum

Wimmins are wearing less, but all wimmins are included in that.. even the wimmins who should not think of wearing any less that a double bed sheet (quilted that is).

Ya have to take the good with the bed though I suppose.

I blame the parents tbh

Pighead

Anti wrote:

It has just come to my attention. They all them 7 wimmin could be whores... plausable?

Definitely not. Pighead propositioned one of the skimpier outfitted ones, offering lots of money in exchange for sex. She told me to fcuk off. Definitely not a whore.

DublinWriter

Pighead wrote:

Why do you wear these flimsy garments so early in the morning?

Any you complain?!?

I think we should start a whip around to buy PH one-way tickets to Saudi Arabia.

elephant_juice

Pighead wrote:

see through socks.

I have to ask. Is this the latest in slutty clothing? and if yes, what are the characteristics of a sexy ankle and how much should be seen?

Pighead

DublinWriter wrote:

Any you complain?!?

I think we should start a whip around to buy PH one-way tickets to Saudi Arabia.

Not exactly complaining, just trying to get inside the womans mind to find out what their motivation is when they go out walking in their skimpies.

The day Pighead complains about a chick in skimpy clothes is the day my mind is no longer my own.

Pighead your threads never fail to brighten my day

cson

Pighead wrote:

The day Pighead complains about a chick in skimpy clothes is the day my mind is no longer my own.

Certain chicks in skimpy clothes are a cause for concern though. As connundrum has said there are those who should not leave their houses wearing anything less than a quilted double bed sheet.

Pighead

cson wrote:

Certain chicks in skimpy clothes are a cause for concern though. As connundrum has said there are those who should not leave their houses wearing anything less than a quilted double bed sheet.

Pighead hears what you're saying alright but I have to admit that even the more amply fleshed ladies get Pigheads loins rumbling during these hot summer months. Probably because sweat has always been sexy to me.

Oh and slightly off topic, but fcuk it, its Pigheads thread, a question for the 40+ year olds(ie Terry). Is the twitch in your underpants still as pronounced now when you see a hot chick or has it become less twitchy over the years? You'd imagine the feelings of lust would decline over the years but seeing as my dad won't talk to me about it I'm not really sure.

Dudess

Ah Pighead, it's the auld fellas who are the horniest!

copacetic

monkeyfudge wrote:

Give him a break.. that third person sh*t is hard... I had a go at a first person plural posting style last night and it just ended up confusing everyone.

what happened with that thread? I had a quick look but as far as I could tell you and you and a group of your 'mates' were in a cubicle together spying at other guys taking a piss?

it freaked me out big style, and i couldn't bring myself to read past the first post. I can't take a leak now without looking over my shoulder for spys. It's pretty messy...

cson

I believe monkeyfudge was attempting a pighead style story in the third person that didn't quite come off as spectacularly as he wished. I would complement Pighead on his abilities using the third person but I'm afraid of what feeding his ego will do. Very afraid.

Oman

Oman would like to compliment pighead on pigheads brilliant use of the third-person. oman is also using the third person and Oman will never do it again.
i'll stop now

jrey1981

I'm guessing there was no shortage of 'milk' for your corn flakes when you got home

copacetic

jrey1981 wrote:

I'm guessing there was no shortage of 'milk' for your corn flakes when you got home

you forgot about his crunchy nuts

jrey1981

copacetic wrote:

you forgot about his crunchy nuts

indeed

Black Swan

Pighead wrote:

Why do you wear these flimsy garments so early in the morning?
To gain the attraction of a potential partner? Is it to make yourself feel young, free sexy and confident? Or is it simply to laugh at my funny boner walk on the way back from the shops?

Pighead? Is this a multiple choice question? Where do I check (x) all of the above? Ha!

copacetic

Blue_Lagoon wrote:

Pighead? Is this a multiple choice question? Where do I check (x) all of the above? Ha!

i'm not sure that was worth a 'Ha!' at the end as if you have now silenced Pighead with you razor sharp retort..