What's your BEST back packing story?

Snickers Man

Calling all unwashed back packers who have spent any time seeing the world, or even just a little part of it, from the bottom up.

Just to really piss Pighead off, got any really good adventure stories that you experienced on your travels that you probably wouldn't have if your method of travel was Plane-taxi-hotel-pool-taxi-plane.?

Do share. Don't worry about making them melodramatic. Or even a little boring. You're among friends here.

After all, back packing is an attitude; not an alternative to the package holiday.

Pighead

Can a Mod lock this thread please? Its stinking the place out.:mad:

Snickers Man

OK I do tongue in cheek.

You do finger on nose.

Sam Vimes

not a very interesting story but i thought it was funny and its the first one that popped into my head

i was in switzerland with a few mates. i'd paid for the hostel with my c/c and they'd all paid me back in euro which was useless in switzerland. i didn't want to carry it around with me so i hid it under the mattress (€300)

anyway, we were there two days and then went to the train station for a ten hour train journey to vienna. we arrived at the station a bit early and decided to have lunch. it was after lunch when i went to pay that i realised i'd left the money under the mattress. the train was in 20 minutes and the taxi journey to the hostel was about 15 minutes

the lads told me to just leave it but it was about half the money i had for the trip. i ran to a taxi, quickly explained why i had to be back in the station ten minutes before i could be and the nice man broke the limit the whole way there (swizz cyclists cycle in the middle of the road btw)

i got to the hostel and there was no one to be found so i ran around shouting for someone. i found a cleaner and the slow bitch sauntered up the stairs.

my heart sank when i found the room had been cleaned and the beds made. it rose again when i saw the money was still there.

i legged it out to the taxi that had turned around and was waiting with the door open, got back to the station expecting to have to find the train but one of the lads was waiting at the entrance. we ran to the train and the doors closed 5 seconds after we got on. a fun day

Saint_Mel

Not the best story of all time (Brian Denehy might play me in the movie
adaptation) but in 2003, just after landing in Hong Kong in the height
of a SARS "crisis" ...

So there I was, in bits with a headcold/chest infection ... which was
starting to cause a minor asthma attack ... walking through customs
coughing and spluttering after handing in the health decleration to say
I hadnt any SARS symptons.

All of a sudden a uniformed soilder hops up and points a gun to the side of
my head!!

Turned out that it was just a thermometer gun to check my temp!

Of course all I saw was a soilder taking out a gun and making a bee line for me! Needless to say I almost filled the pants!

Actually, the more I think of it, thats not a great story at all.

Sorry about that!

biko

Not the best but a short one.
Getting a lift from Israeli soldiers going home for the weekend. Driving through the Negev desert on small roads and the driver with coke bottle glasses on him drinking a six-pack while driving. Halfway there he ran out of beer and pulled in to a station to get more. Then sits down, next six-pack in lap, turns around and smiles at us in the back. "He he, I like beer". He he indeed.

zuutroy

I was going to see my wife in LA in at Christmas at her work party in a skyscraper in Century City, and it turned out the building was being hi-jacked by a group of German terrorists. I took them on one-by-one, and ended up throwing the leader out the window and saving the day. Made friends with a nice police man called Al aswell. Oh no, wait...that was some other guy

ScumLord

I went for a walkabout the redlight district with a bunch of folks from the hostel late one night. One of them was this awful chirpey young English lad that looked like a Channel 4 reality tv presenter. He was hopping and leaping about the place making stupid jokes anoying the hole off everyone.

Then he started dancing infront of the doors shaking his ass at the lovely ladies and running away. Eventually one smiled and called him over to the door as soon as he was in range the door flew open and gave him a nice good box in the face and knocked him on his arse, I gave her a round of appluase.

Burning Eclipse

My bestest backpacker story...

I was in this pub in the middle of nowhere (Herbertstown, I think) and a smelly apple eating backpacker came in asking for directions, so one of the locals beat him with a pool cue till he got detached retinas...

True story

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

Salthillwarrior

This is my best and its not very nice....
Was out at a full moon party in thailand a while back. Great location, vibe everything. Then out of nowhere a blood curdling scream from a little shack near by. We run over to see what the hell was wrong and there was a guy on the ground, naked with blood all over him and a ladyboy beside him. She had ripped out part of his intestines presumably while fisting him because he/she said he was cheating. Never going back to that place again.

Degsy

Was driving along one day on the road to Kinsale when i saw a backpacker holding up a sign for Cork.It was a hot day and there was a long way to go so i pulled over,once the bloke was in the car i pulled out a gun,drove him to a remote location,shot him and buried him in some nettles,i then sold his packpack in a local pub for the price of a cornish pasty and a pint.
There you have it..a backpacker story with a happy ending!!:D

ShowUsYourXbox

My plane crash landed on a desert island... the rest is too confusing.

TerrorFirmer

Degsy wrote:

Was driving along one day on the road to Kinsale when i saw a backpacker holding up a sign for Cork.It was a hot day and there was a long way to go so i pulled over,once the bloke was in the car i pulled out a gun,drove him to a remote location,shot him and buried him in some nettles,i then sold his packpack in a local pub for the price of a cornish pasty and a pint.
There you have it..a backpacker story with a happy ending!!:D

Pighead

Degsy wrote:

Was driving along one day on the road to Kinsale when i saw a backpacker holding up a sign for Cork.It was a hot day and there was a long way to go so i pulled over,once the bloke was in the car i pulled out a gun,drove him to a remote location,shot him and buried him in some nettles,i then sold his packpack in a local pub for the price of a cornish pasty and a pint.
There you have it..a backpacker story with a happy ending!!:D

Beautiful Degsy, just beautiful.

event

mine is the day i decided to go backpacking

then i realised i wasnt a gimp, so i decided not to go

the end

The Hill Billy

If I was a real bad person* I would say that this was a good backpacker story.





* But I'm not, so I won't.

Degsy

This film should also serve as a warning against such behaviour..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolf_Creek_%28film%29

Snickers Man

"Wikipedia does not have an article with this exact name. "

Hey, good link, Gimp. No wonder you've never been backpacking. You probably wouldn't know a zipper from a granny knot.

"Oh like, sod this packing lark. I'll just get mumsie to Fed-Ex my gear where I'm going. Oh and Mumsie, please try not to get my best Hugo Boss jacket creased"

Snickers Man

Salthillwarrior wrote:

This is my best and its not very nice....
...out of nowhere a blood curdling scream from a little shack near by. We run over to see what the hell was wrong and there was a guy on the ground, naked with blood all over him and a ladyboy beside him.etc etc etc .

Eeeuwwww.

And I thought my best one was too crude to list here. And indeed it is. It involves a very public act of love in broad daylight by a busy highway by two living creatures.

Only they weren't from the same species, if you get my drift.

The Hill Billy

Snickers Man wrote:

Hey, good link, Gimp. No wonder you've never been backpacking. You probably wouldn't know a zipper from a granny knot.

"Oh like, sod this packing lark. I'll just get mumsie to Fed-Ex my gear where I'm going. Oh and Mumsie, please try not to get my best Hugo Boss jacket creased"

You're heading towards personal abuse there Snicky. If backpacking is so dear to you - take a hike.

Degsy

Snickers Man wrote:

"Wikipedia does not have an article with this exact name. "

Hey, good link, Gimp. No wonder you've never been backpacking. You probably wouldn't know a zipper from a granny knot.

"Oh like, sod this packing lark. I'll just get mumsie to Fed-Ex my gear where I'm going. Oh and Mumsie, please try not to get my best Hugo Boss jacket creased"

I've never met a poor packpacker.They can afford to go because they have the support of mumsie and dadsie back home.Not only t hat none of them have the guts to go anywhere they might be in the slightest bit of danger in.They go to tourist traps,live like bums,meet other bums and bore everybody to death later with thier stories.My travels would scare the Ross O'carroll-Kelly right out of you!

shrapnel222

two short but true stories:

travelling through Laos with my wife, we need to get from A to B. Two buses leave in the morning. One at 4am and one at 7am. We decide to go for the 7am as 4 seems a bit early for us. 3 hours into the journey, we stop in a village and stay there, wondering what's going on after we've been there for half an hour. someone explains there's been some kind of incident in a bus ahead of us. when we finally leave, ten minutes down the road, we finally see what the incident was: the 4 am bus had been attacked, all the passengers killed and the bus had been set alight. As we pass the smoking remains of the bus, 30 charred corpses have been lined up on the ground.

other one: arriving in colombia by the southern border at around 7pm after a gruelling days travel. We try to get onto the next bus out of there to get to san agustin but the guy at the bus terminal says no foreigners allowed on the bus after dark because there have been too many hijackings, and when there are foreigners, they often kill a few people. result is we have to stay in this nice dodgy border town for the night. we find a crappy hotel, go out for food at the local market and head back for a nice sleep. We're woken up a couple of hours later by a woman screaming. we go in the corridor to check what's going on, and we see a man with a machette, covered in blood run down the stairs.we go back to our room, and five minutes later, police arrive, 10 minutes later, we hear them shovelling sand upstairs. We found out the next day, the woman was a prostitute and the guy an unhappy client- welcome to colombia!!! (this was day 1- the rest of the time spent there was just as eventful)

Snickers Man

Hill Billy wrote:

You're heading towards personal abuse there Snicky. If backpacking is so dear to you - take a hike.

oh come on. you're not taking too many of the postings here seriously are you?

you could ban the whole lot of them if so.

Snickers Man

Degsy wrote:

I've never met a poor packpacker.

Hi, I'm Snickers Man. I'm fat and comfortable now but in my backpacking days it was boats, trains and thumbs.

Degsy wrote:

They go to tourist traps,live like bums,meet other bums and bore everybody to death later with thier stories.

Not all of us. Most "Tourist Traps" would be beyond our price range anyway. They're for grown ups.

degsy wrote:

My travels would scare the Ross O'carroll-Kelly right out of you!

Go on then prove it:

bog snorkelling in Offaly?
Paintballing in Wicklow?

Do tell.

MikeHoncho

shrapnel222 wrote:

two short but true stories:

travelling through Laos with my wife, we need to get from A to B. Two buses leave in the morning. One at 4am and one at 7am. We decide to go for the 7am as 4 seems a bit early for us. 3 hours into the journey, we stop in a village and stay there, wondering what's going on after we've been there for half an hour. someone explains there's been some kind of incident in a bus ahead of us. when we finally leave, ten minutes down the road, we finally see what the incident was: the 4 am bus had been attacked, all the passengers killed and the bus had been set alight. As we pass the smoking remains of the bus, 30 charred corpses have been lined up on the ground.

other one: arriving in colombia by the southern border at around 7pm after a gruelling days travel. We try to get onto the next bus out of there to get to san agustin but the guy at the bus terminal says no foreigners allowed on the bus after dark because there have been too many hijackings, and when there are foreigners, they often kill a few people. result is we have to stay in this nice dodgy border town for the night. we find a crappy hotel, go out for food at the local market and head back for a nice sleep. We're woken up a couple of hours later by a woman screaming. we go in the corridor to check what's going on, and we see a man with a machette, covered in blood run down the stairs.we go back to our room, and five minutes later, police arrive, 10 minutes later, we hear them shovelling sand upstairs. We found out the next day, the woman was a prostitute and the guy an unhappy client- welcome to colombia!!! (this was day 1- the rest of the time spent there was just as eventful)

Sounds like fun times:eek: . Id say you count your blessings every day about the first one.

event

shrapnel222 wrote:

two short but true stories:

travelling through Laos with my wife, we need to get from A to B. Two buses leave in the morning. One at 4am and one at 7am. We decide to go for the 7am as 4 seems a bit early for us. 3 hours into the journey, we stop in a village and stay there, wondering what's going on after we've been there for half an hour. someone explains there's been some kind of incident in a bus ahead of us. when we finally leave, ten minutes down the road, we finally see what the incident was: the 4 am bus had been attacked, all the passengers killed and the bus had been set alight. As we pass the smoking remains of the bus, 30 charred corpses have been lined up on the ground.

but perhaps if you had got on the bus, it never would have happened

Chucky the tree

Its like a big bell-end convention.

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

cold_filter

More of an airport story really but i was on my way backpacking... Dulles airport washington DC, catching a connecting flight to LA, go through metal detectors Beep, went to hand my wallet to the cop "sorry sir its not that easy, take a seat" so sat on a bench with 2 cops and a soldier within 5 years ( oh did i mention i september 12 2002, anyway the soldier had a german shepherd dog bomb sniffer i presume, he starts stiffing away i went to pet him " sir i would stongly advise you do not do that i cannot be held accountable for the dogs actions if you make a phyiscal threat to him" WTF??? Anyway then this big black guy comes over with rubber gloves on (im almost crapping myself!!) Anyway he uses the paddle metal detector, had to take of shoes and socks looked at my watch and my neck. Have a couple of piercings, nipple and knob... he got a perplexed look on him when they beeped, so i basically had to whip my c*ck out at the security gate, mental!

Rozabeez

^ Haha, yeah that one's pretty f*cking funny.

andrew

People seem to hate backpackers because....?

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

shrapnel222

event wrote:

but perhaps if you had got on the bus, it never would have happened

yup, because i had my "never leave home without it" UZI in my bag:D

The Scientist wrote:

I misread that as 'travelling through Laois with my wife' thinking to myself i never heard of that!

LMAO

Mahatma coat

Dunno I have a few good ones meself, like the time I was in HK for PAtricks day, feckin crazy alcohol fueled madness, Climbing the Big rock in the middle of Oz and having a Joint, feckin difficult coming back down

but those are just Touristy things, strangest was when I was in PNG on Business, I was asleep at about 3 AM in my room when the door opened and 4 guys with AK47's and agitated looks on their faces burst in and started to interrogate me, remaining calm is a skill in itself I think.

that and a few car crashes are about as interestin as it gets.

oh and the 3som3 with the Japanese chicks in Perth was nice :P

Saint_Mel

Myself and a few mates got asked if we'd help set up the Faroese Republican
Army once when we were camping in the Faroe Islands!

Local lad asked if we'd help as he was sick of living under Danish rule. Said he
looks to the Irish for inspiration and when an English person dies he cheers, but
when a good IRA man dies he crys!

Then he asked if we'd help find him a woman who would clean his house, or
failing that if we could convince the woman travelling with us if she would
stay behind to clean his house.

Sad Professor

andrew wrote:

People seem to hate backpackers because....?

Jealousy.

Pighead

Sad Professor wrote:

Jealousy.

Jealousy? Are you having a fcuking laugh? Whats to be jealous about? A bunch of self important crusty dreamers with smelly ballsacks telling exaggerated stories to bored onlookers in a corner of a pub about the glorious summer of 95 when they drank opium tea with a 372 year old Tibetan monk. Fcuk that.

event

Sad Professor wrote:

Jealousy.

LOL

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

Pighead

The Scientist wrote:

In that case, would you like to inform us of your chosen topic of conversion in the corner of a pub.
The concept of velcro? sellotape dispensers? how geraldine in accounts is stealing staples?
Pighead you strike me as one fed up, lonely, sad old man who looks down on people who have their youth and have prospects ahead them.
A "Miss Havisham" of sorts who scorns anyone with a sense of adventure.
You've never done but yet you seem to have the right to knock it.
Deep down, you want to do it but you know its too late.
You're middle aged and you have responsibilities.

And you strike Pighead as a jumped up little cnut!

29 is far from middle aged you silly little boy. Third aged would be a far more accurate description. When Pigheads an old man he'll look back fondly at his younger years. There were ladies galore, adventures galore and stories from my travels that would leave you speechless.

Pigheads had more adventures than you've had lonely ****. And as your blistered mini cock will testify, thats an awful lot of adventures.

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

L31mr0d

lol... the degeneration of this thread is delightful. More flaming and less backpacking nonsense I say

ScumLord

Pighead wrote:

And you strike Pighead as a jumped up little cnut!

29 is far from middle aged you silly little boy. Third aged would be a far more accurate description. When Pigheads an old man he'll look back fondly at his younger years. There were ladies galore, adventures galore and stories from my travels that would leave you speechless.

Pigheads had more adventures than you've had lonely ****. And as your blistered mini cock will testify, thats an awful lot of adventures.

Like that time you went to..... Where did you go?

I didn't go anywhere mad, I just 2 months off work and did whatever I wanted around Europe. The backpacker route is much more fun than sitting in a hotel bar trying not pull your eyeballs out when some blue collar gobsheen tells ya all about how ****e his life is.

Pighead

The Scientist wrote:

Now now pigboy, remember where you are...

Still, I'm amazed by the anger and distain.
You should join a club piggy, or better still, Go travelling.

Right, Pighead will say this one more time "TRAVELLING IS NOT THE PROBLEM HERE. ITS THE FCUKING BACKPACKERS THAT GET MY GOAT"

Jesus Christ for a lad that calls himself The Scientist you really are a touch dim. Travelling is great, Pigheads had many fantastic holidays. From the bustling smoggy cities of Mexico to the snow laden streets of Rochester, Pighead has been there done that.

Right then, lets sort this out once and for all. The Scientist, Pighead challenges you to regale him with one of your backpacking stories. C'mon give me all you've got buddy. Dazzle me.

CiaranC

Pighead saw a documentary on the BBC about Mexico City and now pretends to anyone who'll listen that hes actually been there, when in actuality, hes only ever been as far as Inchicore on the Luas and is desperately jealous of those who spent their youth being young and alive while he wasted his.

Naked Lepper

id say its more likely that he got a j1 visa before and went to new york and california, making a trip to T.J for a day while in san diego


sounds like a proper nob anyway!

Pighead

CiaranC wrote:

Pighead saw a documentary on the BBC about Mexico City and now pretends to anyone who'll listen that hes actually been there, when in actuality, hes only ever been as far as Inchicore on the Luas and is desperately jealous of those who spent their youth being young and alive while he wasted his.

He he he, documentary. You're killing Pighead CiaranC. Mexico City was visited back in the late Summer of 2001. Flew to Chicago and then straight on to the craziest city in the world.

The lack of a backpack on his back meant Pighead was forced to find comfortable accomodation in a city centre hotel. The Mexican pyramids was a particular highlight. However probably the most memorable aspect of the holiday was the way the lads were ripped of by the corrupt sneaky Mexicans. Heres the story.

Pighead and his buddy are in a Mexican Bar which is absolutely dead. We hit the street and hail a taxi. "Bring us to a place with lots of people" we tell him. He has no English but says "Chickitas?" We say yeah whatever, chickitas, just bring us somewhere a bit lively.

End up in this place with great looking chicks everywhere. We get very drunk and end up with two Mexican chicks on our knees. Pigheads feeling like Al Pacino at this stage. We buy the girls drinks and great fun is being had by all. Next thing the lights go down and chicks everywhere start taking their clothes off and dancing on tables.

The penny finally drops with the lads. We're in a lap dancing club. Those chicks weren't sitting on our laps out of love for an Irishman. They were after our money. The hungry double crossing bitches We look at each other and make for the door. 7 huge blokes block our path. Sorry gentlemen but you haven't payed the bill.

Bill was the equivelant of 370 Irish Pounds. Couldn't believe it. We had nowhere near that amount on us. The lads were getting heavy and insisted we apy our bill. We say all our moneys back in the hotel. Out of nowhere a taxi driver appears. The same driver that brought us here, only this time the cnut has perfect English. "I'll bring you to your hotel boys" he says like hes doing us a favour. One of you stay here "snorts the owner of the club. Pighead being a lot quicker of mind than his buddy shouts out "I'll stay"

Anyway my buddy gets back to the hotel with 4 big blokes and gets out the travellers cheques. The boys aren't happy with this and start pushing him around. One of them makes a phone call and next thing, they're driving to the airport at 3am. Taxi Man rings his mate in the Bureau De Change and tells him to open up as they're on the way, he'll make it worth his while(Or to be more accurate some of our travellers cheques would make it worth his while)

Final bill came to 460 quid. Pighead had to spend 2 hours on his own watching naked Mexican chicks strut their stuff whilst my buddy was being pushed shoved and robbed by heavy Mexican gangsters. But I had no regrets. Some have said to me that I'm the worst friend in the world. But thats not true. Truth is I never liked the cnut.

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

Pighead

The Scientist wrote:

I havent done it yet pighead, but i have every intention of doing it.

You haven't gone backpacking yet?:eek:

Holy fcuk, if your this insufferable at the moment, Pighead shudders to think what you'll be like with a years long worth of wankerness added to your personality.

No offence buddy.

the whole year inn

Not really a back packing story but here I go any way.

In New York 2 summers ago and after a few beers all day hit the town ,ended up in this bar packed full to the brim so spical offers where the pitchers me and my brother decided to go on rounds of them .After a couple of rounds of this and after kicking there ass in pool, the lads went outside to have a smoke when this fella comes running down the stairs shouting on his phone <american accent> "you got to come down here man the Irish are drinking like pigs "

Guess you had to be there but it was funny as hell considering there beer is pi$$ poor.