Guys, Thoughts on women chatting you up?

Mackleton

Hey so Im wondering where guys come down on the whole women chatting men up issue. What do you honestly think of women who do it? Freaked out, turned on, turned off by her pushiness.... I want honest serious answers here by the way, not the first thing that pops into your heads, ie. being jumped by some hottie in a bar without warning. Would you respect the girl or think her desperate? Or would you imagine she must be gagging for it or something?

aidan_walsh

Really, why should it be any different for women to chat men up than for men to chat women up?

Personally, I'd have no problem with it at all.

For me theres a huge difference between chatting up and chatting to.. but that might just be me

Karl Hungus

No problems here.

Mackleton

Hmmm good difference or bad difference? As in if you didnt pursue her yourself then you have no interest?

is_that_so

No problem with it at all although desperation you can see a mile off.

WindSock

How else are Women here going to get to speak to someone they find attractive at the bar? Wait for him to come over to you? AHhahahahhaaaaa

Ruu_Old

No problem with it though it rarely happened.

pclancy

I wish it happened to me more often! The times that it has the girl has always been "i seen ya smiling at me, why didnt you come over?"

Never have the balls!

humbert

I think it would be great....would be:(

PeakOutput

no problem with it

Drift

I think its great ....... although an extremely rare occurance. Not so rare on foreign soil though so it must be an irish cultural thing.

Pigman II

Bloody unnatural behaviour! Next it'll be raining cats and dogs that want to sleep together.

Sputs-Lover

I'd love it

constitutionus

its wonderful. one of the best things about the imbalance between the genders now. i remember in the late 80's women were completely up their own arses because there were so many men out there . now a girl has to chat ya up if she's to be in with a chance.

theyre still not the best at it. some girls still resort to "acidently" bumping into you to get your attention and hope you'll take it from there but more and more will actually buy you a drink and take the initiative.

personally i dont see how anyone could be against it.:D

and hey lets say she is gagging for it, since when is that a bad thing ! this might shock the girls out there but its nice to be thought of as attractive and certainly does the ol ego no harm

Sputs-Lover

I'd love it!

Pigman II

constitutionus wrote:

some girls still resort to "acidently" bumping into you to get your attention

Is that what that was about? Wish I had known I had all these women throwing themselves at me. I just assume they are drunk and/or clumsy and go about my way.

xebec

Far too rare IMO, I love it when a girl does the chatting up! Although it does get me in trouble with the gf sometimes!

the_syco

About time. Never seen it happen, tho.

Procrastinator

Mackleton wrote:

Hey so Im wondering where guys come down on the whole women chatting men up issue. What do you honestly think of women who do it? Freaked out, turned on, turned off by her pushiness.... I want honest serious answers here by the way, not the first thing that pops into your heads, ie. being jumped by some hottie in a bar without warning. Would you respect the girl or think her desperate? Or would you imagine she must be gagging for it or something?

This is an awkward question. The answer depends on lots of variables, but what I will say is this: Women are not skilled in chatting people up…they’re more used to having it done to them.
This means that women are unskilled in this area. As any woman will tell you, when sober, it takes a good deal to be chatted up properly, and those men who are funny, witty, and audacious do quite well for themselves. But women are not used to doing this the other way around, ie they have had very little practice.
I really appreciate guys’ guts to chat women up, because it’s a hard thing to do and I really appreciate the good chat ups. It must be difficult to gague someone and then give her what she wants…tell her what she wants to hear…something I find difficult to do.
I have an even greater appreciation of this because of my behaviour last Friday night. I got hammered, but not so as was really noticeable to others; I’m a quiet drunk who feels that if I’ve lost the power of speech, its not worth drinking at all. Alcohol should open the conversation, not shut it down. But this fact was also, unfortunately, my downfall. I kept bloody talking in an effort to impress this guy; and was a gibbering, opinionated mixture of arrogance, bigmouth-ed-ness, conceit, and stupidity. From liking me in the first 10 mins, a half an hour later he literally ran away…and when I think of the sh**e I was coming out with, I don’t really blame him. I would have done exactly the same!

And the moral of the lesson was this: chatting up, or in my case allowing someone to do it eloquently and without interruption, is a skill of balance, timing, charm gab and luck. And practice makes perfect. Done correctly, there’s no reason why women can’t do it as well as men. Mind you, I said done properly, because there is a bad way to do this too. (With my own Friday night’s debacle being an example of what not to do). I think the key is to listen. Chatting up is just really good conversation + lust!

Good luck to you all!

constitutionus

constitutionus wrote:

some girls still resort to "acidently" bumping into you to get your attention

School yard tactics y'see. You're supposed to shove them back.

Nevyn

the_syco wrote:

About time. Never seen it happen, tho.

It happens I have asked people out in the past and would do so again.
I certainly would not be with my current partner if I had not have had a gumption to ask him out and to kiss him when he hesitated.

Hagar

Ruu wrote:

No problem with it though it rarely happened.

Same for me, funny enough it's happening more often of late.
They must think I'm a rich eccentric or something.

randylonghorn

Doesn't happen half often enough, imho.

WindSock

Of course blokes are going to love the Idea of it. Especially Irish blokes, too feckin laid back and lazy to do it themselves. I'm surpised have of ye don't have yer Mammys out with you to do it for you.

''Look Ma, ders a girl I like..''

''Ah will you go and say hello to my Son, He's only gorgeous..."

BopNiblets

I had a girl pouring one or two pints of beer into my mouth one night... seemed to do the trick (would you say "I can do it myself!"? )

Except I had to get sick soon after we were kissing.

Savman

Come n get me ladies

rannerap

i asked my bf lol its been 2 yrs now:)

Flukey

It would be good to see more of it.

Call Me Jimmy

I wouldn't mind it if it only happened every once in a while but every day is a bit too much for me to take.

constitutionus

Deleted User wrote:

School yard tactics y'see. You're supposed to shove them back.

was down goldsmiths one night when this brunette kept banging into me as i stood at the railings by the dancefloor and shouted "EXCUSE ME! im trying to drink a pint here!!" right at her . poor girls face just dropped ,went bright red, and wouldnt stop apologising to me till i told her i was only messing and took it from there.

bad i know, but it was fecking obvious she wanted to talk to me. why the hell is it so hard for them? all i can do is say "no". its not like theres not another bloke in the world. if men gave up as easily as women half the planet would be barren

at the end of the day were not that different. blokes dont want to be rejected anymore than girls do and its just as tough for us as it is for you. if some twat thinks your desperate or loose feck him and move on to a guy who'll appreciate it

melekalikimaka

tis the only way i pull, and its nice, tho i can't be half as picky, i give off weird girl pheromones i think

445279.ie

boreds wrote:

''Look Ma, ders a girl I like..''

''Ah will you go and say hello to my Son, He's only gorgeous..."

V9

Wouldnt mind it at all.

NutJob

About time.:D

CathyMoran

OK, know that I am a girl on this thread - the nearest that I did to chatting a guy up was ringing home and getting him to take down my number, he had chatted me up previously...we are now married.

jester77

I've had a few women chat me up but most would give the eye and leave it to me do the chatting up! I've had some crude chat up methods, pinching the bum is a common one, even had a girl come over to me and grab my crotch before saying anything :eek:

The_B_Man

women are generally crap at chattin up, tho they get results. The way women do it is initiate the convo in some way, be it by showing you one of the toys they bring out on girls nights out, like whistles, pacifiers, glow in the dark thingys, whatever, but they show you it as in a kinda "Look at this! ps come over here!" in which the bloke is expected to go over and then chat HER up. Or, she can come over to you at the bar when ur buyin a drink and maybe initiate conversation in which you have to take on and carry on the conversation. depending on drunkeness, its rarer to see girls chattin up fellas in the same way as we do. ya'd rarely see a girl comin over and bein pushy and goin in for the kiss too soon, they mostly wait for the bloke to take the lead. In sayin that tho, girls on here have taken the lead when the fella has been too shy. problem with girls chattin fellas up is that, as a bloke, if ya turn down a ride, ur mates might give ya abuse or slag ya or some other random man ritual, so its known for fellas to actually go off with girls that chat them up and shag them even if they dont want to! though in sayin that, theres also the blokes who would go off with anything, however, they;re not usally the type that get chatted up.

In summary, its good if you actually are attracted to the girl that chats u up. else its kinda awkward, especially if shes desperate.

Hail 2 Da Chimp

constitutionus wrote:

some girls still resort to "acidently" bumping into you to get your attention

Or even pulling your hair in the play ground.

But girls chatting me up only happenes when I'm have a girlfriend as the reak of desperation has left...

NutJob

jester77 wrote:

I've had some crude chat up methods, pinching the bum is a common one, even had a girl come over to me and grab my crotch before saying anything :eek:

Just in case girls don't know grabbing a guy by the nads is not a good approach.
Though my friends thought it was hilarious when it happened to me even nicknamed the girl "patmacrotch" to this day.

But im glad to hear im not alone

Sleepy

Nothing better than a girl who asks can she buy me a pint

Well, except for the one girl who once approached me with the immortal line "If you make love the same way as you dance, I'm in for a great night...". Took a while for me to get my jaw back off the floor after that!

It's *FAR* too rare that a girl has the guts to approach guys though. It's a very attractive quality in a woman imho.

limklad

Mackleton wrote:

Hey so Im wondering where guys come down on the whole women chatting men up issue.
What do you honestly think of women who do it? Freaked out, turned on, turned off by her pushiness.... I want honest serious answers here by the way, not the first thing that pops into your heads, ie. being jumped by some hottie in a bar without warning. Would you respect the girl or think her desperate? Or would you imagine she must be gagging for it or something?

No problem, but it does depends on her approach, and if she willing to accept a polite rejection when there is no spark. I did come across women who were very very pushy and did not like rejection and reacted very very badly.
As long as they are confident and very comfortable with themselves,then I have no problems with them approaching me.

Drift wrote:

....... although an extremely rare occurance. Not so rare on foreign soil though so it must be an irish cultural thing.

I definitely agree.

constitutionus wrote:

some girls still resort to "acidently" bumping into you to get your attention

Light bumping is not desperate provided with a confident chat “hi,……..”, I did see a woman nearly plaster a fella just to get his attention. Poor guy ended on his arse. It certainly worked as she got his attention. That was desperation at it best! He gave her credit for trying and chatted for the night once she got over the .

Also I got so drunk once :rolleyes:(in college ragweek), sitting quietly (could not move), that this girl started talking to me, with no interaction from me for the entire time, continues with the chatting and after 1 hour she says in a genuine tone "Thanks for the chat, You are a very good listener, I enjoyed this chat, bye and I hope to see you around" My College friends burst into tears laughing once they heard this, because they knew the state I was in.

The best chat up line, I ever got from a girl, was with her confident sexy eyes (none of the eyes flashing thing) followed by kissing, nothing needed to be said from her to get my attention.
edit: (oooh I miss french women )

DarkJager

Most women only chat men up to get a free drink and play some mind games so they get a free night on the town. A man who thinks with his brain rather than his snake would tell such a woman where to go....

runswithascript

Women chat men up?

PeakOutput

jester77 wrote:

even had a girl come over to me and grab my crotch before saying anything :eek:

that happened me although it was more of a massage and although ud think i was in there .............apparently not... i went home a confused chappie

PeakOutput

Sleepy wrote:

Well, except for the one girl who once approached me with the immortal line "If you make love the same way as you dance, I'm in for a great night...". Took a while for me to get my jaw back off the floor after that!

i'd marry her personally luv someone who is oozing confidence

DarkJager wrote:

Most women only chat men up to get a free drink and play some mind games so they get a free night on the town. A man who thinks with his brain rather than his snake would tell such a woman where to go....

its so transparent when they are trying to do this though but just in case i have a rule never to buy someone a drink the first night i meet them ....saves me alot of money