Tony Quinn.. another story

yomchi

As some of you would have known from before, I like stop at the Tony Quinn Kiosk's in town just to hear his little elves use their NLP and special sales tactics.. especially when the Mrs is in Roches

Anyway, I saw they have this new weight gainer out or 'Mass Builder' as its called. So I walked over to have a pike a it.
As soon as I picked it up, your wan on the counter started into her garbage - 'thats the best muscle builder on the market'
Really I said.. I had a look at the back of it, and was I shocked? Well no.. not at all. Per serving was a whopping 9g of protein and 17g of carbs :rolleyes:
Should I say anyhting? Like how does 9g of protein and 17g of carbs work towards putting on weight.. I thought na, why bother.
Then she started into, your guaranteed no whey protein in that product... you know whey protein is scientifically proven to be useless for muscle building. Should I say anyhting? - Na why bother

Then this little Spanish woman came over and started to ask about looking for a product to gain weight and give her more energy. (im still reading the back of the other product)
The elf started into her drivvle-

"O you come to the right place. Tony has developed Casein protein for weight gain"

Should I say anything.. Na why bother

The spanish woman said, a friend said I need a carbohydrate drink for enegry.

The elf - "oh no, carbohydrate makes you feel sleepy"

Should I say anything? - the bloodometre is rising.

Spanish woman says, "o..... o...k, well can you give a product that will help me gain weight but not fat"

Elf " of course Tony's Casein is just for you" ...then wait for it.... "Have you heard of Jennifer Aniston?"

Spanish woman - "yes"

Elf "well this product will help you look like her" (i kid you not)

Should I say anything.. damn right!

"Excuse me" says I, " but thats the worst bit of advice i've ever heard anyone being given by you lot, you have no morals. Stupid woman"

She points to a card board pic of the guy who runs TQ's gym for him, guy with red hair and a mediocre build and says "but he uses it"

Pathetic! The woman ended up not buying anything but just watched us argue LOL. They really are a pathetic bunch of loosers in that TQ camp.
All they are interested in is filling TQ's treasure chest and rubbing each others ego's. Man i despise them :mad:

Anyway, im thinking of starting an under ground army who's sole objective will be to go around and annoy TQ sales people

Who's in :cool:

King of Kings

i'm in.

also please go back more often as your tales amuse me greatly.

tribulus

hehe nice one Jon. A few times i've been in the jervis with the gf and all she hears from me is angry grumbling under my breath when we walk past the little shack - i'm still working up to actually going in and teling the guy he's a gobsh1te of the highest order.

brianthebard

Will you video it next time? Sounds brilliant, I love it when brainless sales staff are put in their place. (don't have a problem with sales staff if they know what they are talking about obviously!)

empirix

In fairness the dude in the pic is in pretty good shape, his a small guy i believe, but an aquaintance tells me who is in the gym says he(pic guy) is obsessed with Tony Quinn and has gone on his seminars to the Bahamas or wherever 3 or 4 times - mental, they cost a fortune, just another very lost soul or disciple as i like to say,
i actually went to a kiosk about 6 months ago because a few years back(or maybe even later) they used to sell eas products, the guy said they stopped selling them because they were no good and recommended a tq product and was a bout to blather on, i just looked him in the eye and just said no, he didn't know what to say - brought a smile to my face as i walked away. I think some of his workers have doubts about the products themselves.

Easygainer

Haha - I always go in and pretend I'm a vegan to see what **** they'll spew out. I claim I need more size...

(Funnier if you knew me)

iregk

I'm in. Oh I feel a short trip to Stephens Green center on lunch is needed

Jak

Personally I find TQ, the stores, gyms, 'mind training seminars' and assosciated hard sell pyramid approach pretty offensive.

I'd expect nothing more from their stores than what you posted there.

Dragan

Tony Quinn is a visionary. What he has done for the fitness industry in Ireland and how he has improved peoples lives cannot be described in mere words. In fact, the only way I could tell you how fantastic a man he is would be to sing to you in "Angel Voice", which Tony taught to me personally for the low low price of 200,000 euro. Sadly, this beautiful angelic tongue, which Tony uses to deliver his messages to the chosen, would crush your puny whey loving minds!

However, Tony and I will pray for you, asking the Almighty Bank Balance to look kindly on those who turn their back on Tony's greatest invention "Casein" in favour of it's lesser performing foe, "whey".

Disclaimer : the poster may or may not be taking the piss, that depends solely on your sense of humour. If you laughed while reading this then rejoice, knock back a whey shake and hit the weights. If you nodded in agreeance at any point then please, feel free to throw yourself from something really high, onto something really hard.

rubadub

I wonder what is real reason is for ditching the whey?
It would be like obriens offy turning around and saying they are only selling whiskey, no vodka here, its crap!

Anybody buying in TQ's obviously doesnt have a clue about prices, so they are being ripped off, why doesnt he sell cheaper whey at the same price as the casein?

turbot

Rubadub,

TQ's stores are actually good value when you consider that when you buy from his stores, not only are you getting the products, but you are also receiving Tony's "mind power".

Legend has it that Tony's mind power is so strong that, like Jesus turning water into wine, he is able to transmute high priced, medium quality products into the finest products in the World, bar none. Obviously, because of this miracle, you too can achieve miracle results with his products. If you don't believe me, ask the people who work in his shops!

With Tony's products in your tummy, and his mind power driving your muscles, and his prayers adjusting the scientific laws of anabolic response for you personally, you can feel: strong enough to bench press a locomotive, run fast enough to actually go back in time, and actually hang off a cliff with one arm, holding someone of your same body weight with your other arm and pull them up (like in the movies).

Ranked, by some, as only third in sheer mind power to Chuck Norris, and then Jesus, TQ can help you achieve your destiny and become one of the people featured in his advertorials, and maybe even work in his shops.

But wait... there's more.

When you buy from his shops, not only do you get the products itself, but you also get the opportunity to be convinced by the sales assistant that you too can develop similar mind power, for less than the second hand price of a 2 year old, well maintained coupe. This is obviously a bargain.

Thats right, such knowledge is only available from Tony, and a mere 25,000 euros can start you on the road to not only having the body of your dreams, but may also lead to ancillary benefits such as being able to control the weather with your mind, recharging your mobile phone by holding it in your hand, and lighting fires using your eyes.

Disclaimer : the poster may or may not be taking the piss, depending soley on your metaphysical, philosophical and ontological versatility or indoctrination. If you believed all of the above and couldn't understand the last sentence at all then congratulations, it's your lucky day: if you send 100 euros by paypal, in the afterlife you will be reborn onto a planet that continually indulges your best sexual fantasies over and over - GUARANTEED (or double your money back. Terms and conditions apply).

brianthebard

That's tony's new shopping channel spiel, well done turbot!

yomchi

turbot wrote:

Rubadub,

TQ's stores are actually good value when you consider that when you buy from his stores, not only are you getting the products, but you are also receiving Tony's "mind power".

Legend has it that Tony's mind power is so strong that, like Jesus turning water into wine, he is able to transmute high priced, medium quality products into the finest products in the World, bar none. Obviously, because of this miracle, you too can achieve miracle results with his products. If you don't believe me, ask the people who work in his shops!

With Tony's products in your tummy, and his mind power driving your muscles, and his prayers adjusting the scientific laws of anabolic response for you personally, you can feel: strong enough to bench press a locomotive, run fast enough to actually go back in time, and actually hang off a cliff with one arm, holding someone of your same body weight with your other arm and pull them up (like in the movies).

Ranked, by some, as only third in sheer mind power to Chuck Norris, and then Jesus, TQ can help you achieve your destiny and become one of the people featured in his advertorials, and maybe even work in his shops.

But wait... there's more.

When you buy from his shops, not only do you get the products itself, but you also get the opportunity to be convinced by the sales assistant that you too can develop similar mind power, for less than the second hand price of a 2 year old, well maintained coupe. This is obviously a bargain.

Thats right, such knowledge is only available from Tony, and a mere 25,000 euros can start you on the road to not only having the body of your dreams, but may also lead to ancillary benefits such as being able to control the weather with your mind, recharging your mobile phone by holding it in your hand, and lighting fires using your eyes.

Disclaimer : the poster may or may not be taking the piss, depending soley on your metaphysical, philosophical and ontological versatility or indoctrination. If you believed all of the above and couldn't understand the last sentence at all then congratulations, it's your lucky day: if you send 100 euros by paypal, in the afterlife you will be reborn onto a planet that continually indulges your best sexual fantasies over and over - GUARANTEED (or double your money back. Terms and conditions apply).

LMFOA

TerrorFirmer

turbot wrote:

Rubadub,

TQ's stores are actually good value when you consider that when you buy from his stores, not only are you getting the products, but you are also receiving Tony's "mind power".

Legend has it that Tony's mind power is so strong that, like Jesus turning water into wine, he is able to transmute high priced, medium quality products into the finest products in the World, bar none. Obviously, because of this miracle, you too can achieve miracle results with his products. If you don't believe me, ask the people who work in his shops!

With Tony's products in your tummy, and his mind power driving your muscles, and his prayers adjusting the scientific laws of anabolic response for you personally, you can feel: strong enough to bench press a locomotive, run fast enough to actually go back in time, and actually hang off a cliff with one arm, holding someone of your same body weight with your other arm and pull them up (like in the movies).

Ranked, by some, as only third in sheer mind power to Chuck Norris, and then Jesus, TQ can help you achieve your destiny and become one of the people featured in his advertorials, and maybe even work in his shops.

But wait... there's more.

When you buy from his shops, not only do you get the products itself, but you also get the opportunity to be convinced by the sales assistant that you too can develop similar mind power, for less than the second hand price of a 2 year old, well maintained coupe. This is obviously a bargain.

Thats right, such knowledge is only available from Tony, and a mere 25,000 euros can start you on the road to not only having the body of your dreams, but may also lead to ancillary benefits such as being able to control the weather with your mind, recharging your mobile phone by holding it in your hand, and lighting fires using your eyes.

Disclaimer : the poster may or may not be taking the piss, depending soley on your metaphysical, philosophical and ontological versatility or indoctrination. If you believed all of the above and couldn't understand the last sentence at all then congratulations, it's your lucky day: if you send 100 euros by paypal, in the afterlife you will be reborn onto a planet that continually indulges your best sexual fantasies over and over - GUARANTEED (or double your money back. Terms and conditions apply).

Quality post turbot

amazingemmet

BEST. POST. EVER. @ turbot

rubadub

turbot wrote:

develop similar mind power, for less than the second hand price of a 2 year old, well maintained coupe. This is obviously a bargain.

Classic, I saw something similar on another site about him, "your life is worth more than a car, so pay me the price of a car" or some similar warped logic, nutcase!

Bottle_of_Smoke

I'm sure there's some truth in what you're all saying but I went to that gym & I've seen people get very good results on 3x 20 minute sessions per week.

So must be doing something right. The guy mentioned (Conor) as pointed out is quite a small guy 5'6 I'd say, excellent trainer.

Spanish woman - "yes"

Elf "well this product will help you look like her" (i kid you not)

She could just have been being light hearted. Like in a "I'm saying this because you'll know I'm joking" way

rubadub

Bottle_of_Smoke wrote:

I'm sure there's some truth in what you're all saying but I went to that gym & I've seen people get very good results on 3x 20 minute sessions per week.

So must be doing something right.

I have no doubt people can do well in the gym, people are just opposed to the TQ bullshi t and overpriced products, dismissing of other products and the ridiculous pricing of the seminars. I dont think many are moaning about the gyms.

I wonder if his fans use the internet or has he condemed it or something! type his name into goggle and 1/2 the sites are ridiculing and exposing him.

yomchi

Bottle_of_Smoke wrote:

I'm sure there's some truth in what you're all saying but I went to that gym & I've seen people get very good results on 3x 20 minute sessions per week.

So must be doing something right. The guy mentioned (Conor) as pointed out is quite a small guy 5'6 I'd say, excellent trainer.



She could just have been being light hearted. Like in a "I'm saying this because you'll know I'm joking" way

You go to any gym and you'll get results. Im sure Conor is a good trainer, as I didn't say he wasn't. She was just using him to sell her ware.

And no she wasn't being light hearted, she was forcing a sale.

slicus ricus

LMFAO . I thought i was the only one that couldnt resist going into a Tony Quinn stall whenever im passing one to rip the piss. Some of the stuff they tell you when they think you're interested in buying a product is absolutely priceless.

I remember one time a couple of years ago, the sales person told me that Arnold Schwarzenegger got to the size he did in his prime by taking casein . I kid you not - i nearly pissed myself laughing! When i suggested that steroids may have helped Arnold achieve his multiple time Olympia winning physique, she tryed to say that Arnold never used steroids, only casein - more convulsions of laughing

yomchi

LMAO!

Seriously guys you should try giving it a bash. Just walk over, try keep a straight face and pretend to look interested, then just sit back and let the good times roll!!

A guy I once knew who worked with the TQ empire (and who was part of the team assigned to badger me into paying €18,000 for a seminar) has since fallen out with them and has told me how pressurised the sales people are into bringing in the dough. It happened to be the reason why he fell out with them, the pressure he was under to make the right sales and bring in the money, he said he was told that Tony 'wasn't happy' with his performances and that he wasn't playing as part of the 'team'.
They are seriously a scary bunch of lu la's.

rubadub

Jon wrote:

Tony's Casein is just for you" ...then wait for it.... "Have you heard of Jennifer Aniston?"

Spanish woman - "yes"

Elf "well this product will help you look like her" (i kid you not)

Thats it! next time I will go in asking for the stuff that makes you look like her, then tell them I work as a drag queen at the weekends and want it for that purpose.

slicus ricus

LOL - Best of luck with that rubadub.:D

You'd wanna be in fairly desperate nee of a job to work under those conditions - being under pressure to sell people sh*te!!!

brianthebard

slicus ricus wrote:

LMFAO . I thought i was the only one that couldnt resist going into a Tony Quinn stall whenever im passing one to rip the piss. Some of the stuff they tell you when they think you're interested in buying a product is absolutely priceless.

I remember one time a couple of years ago, the sales person told me that Arnold Schwarzenegger got to the size he did in his prime by taking casein . I kid you not - i nearly pissed myself laughing! When i suggested that steroids may have helped Arnold achieve his multiple time Olympia winning physique, she tryed to say that Arnold never used steroids, only casein - more convulsions of laughing

That is both dispicable and hilarious at the same time.

slicus ricus

brianthebard wrote:

That is both dispicable and hilarious at the same time.

Im assuming you mean it's dispicable that someone working for the cult of tony quinnism would attempt to rip off young aspiring lifters by feeding them with such rubbish.

When she saw my reaction to her saying Arnold never used gear, she knew i was never gonna buy it and backtracked in an embarassed manner saying: "ah well maybe he did, who knows". She was still adament that he supplemented with casein.

I wonder just how big Tony's profit margins are per tub of casein - i would guess 90%. Anyone know?

yomchi

slicus ricus wrote:

Im assuming you mean it's dispicable that someone working for the cult of tony quinnism would attempt to rip off young aspiring lifters by feeding them with such rubbish.

When she saw my reaction to her saying Arnold never used gear, she knew i was never gonna buy it and backtracked in an embarassed manner saying: "ah well maybe he did, who knows". She was still adament that he supplemented with casein.

I wonder just how big Tony's profit margins are per tub of casein - i would guess 90%. Anyone know?

Considering his products are choc full of..nothing I would say close to 90%

TerrorFirmer

Like....his stuff isn't even packaged well either, cheap and gaudy spring to mind as accurate descriptions but it really extends beyond that. The same people that package the likes of Euroworlds enticing electronics that are guaranteed to be already broken out of the packet probably designed all his labels too.

paddyc

jon


how you? I have to say although I know less about their stuff than you i used to lioe going in and doing the same as you...

one of their lads used to train thai and try sell all TQ products to the fighters... one lad trying to cut weight for a fight bought some stuff and put on weight... I kid you not... I had to sit in a sauna with him till he lost it all....


I was buying some viper and went to price it and he said its the cheapest in Dublin, I said i would try workout world ont he Quays, he said we cheaper ring them from my phone if you want to check....

So i headed over anyways and the other place was cheaper.... headed back over to TQ and he was serving/bull ****ting to some one just poked my nose in the door and shouted...

"hey mate you told me a pack o lies... that stuff was cheaper in work out world" and walked off laughing to myself...


must head in again in the new year to annoy them

brianthebard

slicus ricus wrote:

Im assuming you mean it's dispicable that someone working for the cult of tony quinnism would attempt to rip off young aspiring lifters by feeding them with such rubbish.

Well not only that but the fact that the sales staff know fu|ck all about the product, bodybuilding or professionals like arnie. I mean children in the womb know arnie took steroids. Whatever about forcing a product on a person, not even knowing what the product is supposed to do or what is good or bad is even worse imo.

yomchi

paddyc wrote:

jon


how you? I have to say although I know less about their stuff than you i used to lioe going in and doing the same as you...

one of their lads used to train thai and try sell all TQ products to the fighters... one lad trying to cut weight for a fight bought some stuff and put on weight... I kid you not... I had to sit in a sauna with him till he lost it all....


I was buying some viper and went to price it and he said its the cheapest in Dublin, I said i would try workout world ont he Quays, he said we cheaper ring them from my phone if you want to check....

So i headed over anyways and the other place was cheaper.... headed back over to TQ and he was serving/bull ****ting to some one just poked my nose in the door and shouted...

"hey mate you told me a pack o lies... that stuff was cheaper in work out world" and walked off laughing to myself...


must head in again in the new year to annoy them

Hi Paddy,
I was talking to one of the lads from Bridgestone and he was telling me one of Tony's lads was training there and was trying to sell the fighters mind relaxing tapes..could be the same fella!
Someone told me Colin O Shoughnessy is advertising his products now? He was with AKAI not sure who now

Hail 2 Da Chimp

hahaha best thread ever. Stickie please!

J.S. Pill

Hail 2 Da Chimp wrote:

hahaha best thread ever. Stickie please!

Amen! I think we should call the sticky '101 reasons why Tony Quinn is Sh!t'. Why stop there, we could do one of those hard hitting investigative documentaries where we expose him for the shyster he most truly is.

Easygainer

http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=whey&word2=casein


/thread

Cravez

This thread is the best thread iv read in ages, its hilarious and every word is true. I also love the way they have labelled their protein "instant" when ironically its a casein product and its just gunk in a tub!

Tony Quinns 'Instant Protein', click if you dare!

I think somthing like a big group of people going to TQ's hut all at the same time and put pressure on the elves and correct every mistake they make, that should put some pressure on them and would be a right laugh.

yomchi

Michael Cravez wrote:

This thread is the best thread iv read in ages, its hilarious and every word is true. I also love the way they have labelled their protein "instant" when ironically its a casein product and its just gunk in a tub!

Tony Quinns 'Instant Protein', click if you dare!

I think somthing like a big group of people going to TQ's hut all at the same time and put pressure on the elves and correct every mistake they make, that should put some pressure on them and would be a right laugh.

Watch out for the word play and the subliminal messaging :eek:

slicus ricus

Michael Cravez wrote:

I think somthing like a big group of people going to TQ's hut all at the same time and put pressure on the elves and correct every mistake they make, that should put some pressure on them and would be a right laugh.

LOL.:D Thats a great idea dude - you can count me in for that one! We should all arrange to meet up in the ilac some saturday and work our way through all the TQ stores in town!!!

Jon, I went into your shop on Saturday morning to pick up some RAM. Was talking to your colleague - he said you wouldnt be in until later. Its a slick set up ya got there with loads of good products. I was impressed dude.

yomchi

Jon, I went into your shop on Saturday morning to pick up some RAM. Was talking to your colleague - he said you wouldnt be in until later. Its a slick set up ya got there with loads of good products. I was impressed dude.

Thanks man! Yeh he told me you were in! Did he try telling you you'll look like arnie after taking RAM for a week? Jennifer Aniston analogy's don't go down well with the blokes

slicus ricus

Jon wrote:

Thanks man! Yeh he told me you were in! Did he try telling you you'll look like arnie after taking RAM for a week? Jennifer Aniston analogy's don't go down well with the blokes

LMFAO