If you were Invisible....

Pighead

"If I was invisible, Then I could just watch you in your room" . Well thats what the pervs of boyband D-Side wanted to do if they ever got the chance to become invisible. To be honest that lines just plain creepy and the lads should be ashamed of themselves.

Anyway as this BBC report from last week tells us, http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/6064620.stm , those clever scientists are one step closer to inventing the art of invisibility. For those who can't be arsed reading the link it basically says that invisibility will be invented by the end of November and will be available to the public by early December (Just in time for the Christmas market)

If Pighead were invisible he'd spy on his buddy John for a while. I'm almost sure the fcuker talks about me behind my back and it would be lovely to find out once and for all how brilliant my instincts are.

A definite no no would be to check out chicks on the toilet or in various states of undress as that would be abusing my invisibility. Also i'd be afraid my mother would catch me at it as she would be using her invisibility to spy on me to find out for once and for all if her only son was a dirty rotten pervert.

So what would you use your invisibility for?

Agamemnon

I'd go on the Late Late Show and every time Pat Kenny opened his mouth, I'd punch him. Same goes for Ronan Collins and Derek Mooney. Should improve RTE ratings no end.
I'd go into women's dressing rooms but only to catch other invisible pervs and throw them out.

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

free2fly

If I was invisible I'd play Santa at Christmas and leave lots of presents for families that can't afford to buy things for their children. That way their pride would be intact and the kids would be happy

Pighead

agamemnon wrote:

I'd go on the Late Late Show and every time Pat Kenny opened his mouth, I'd punch him. Same goes for Ronan Collins and Derek Mooney. Should improve RTE ratings no end.
I'd go into women's dressing rooms but only to catch other invisible pervs and throw them out.

Excellent usage of your invisibility there agamemnon. Punching Pat Kenny and ridding the country of invisible pervs should be more than enough to ensure your nomination for invisible person of the year.

petes

free2fly wrote:

If I was invisible I'd play Santa at Christmas and leave lots of presents for families that can't afford to buy things for their children. That way their pride would be intact and the kids would be happy

You wouldn't go around trying to peek at mens todgers then?

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

Pighead

free2fly wrote:

If I was invisible I'd play Santa at Christmas and leave lots of presents for families that can't afford to buy things for their children. That way their pride would be intact and the kids would be happy

What a noble and honorable gesture free2fly. But lets be honest here, you'd get the presents by walking into a toyshop and putting the toys into your invisible bag with the word SWAG written on in invisible ink.

connundrum

Pighead wrote:

Punching Pat Kenny and ridding the country of invisible pervs should be more than enough to ensure your nomination for invisible person of the year.

/Offers an invisible golden handshake

I'd go round randomly kicking people in the arse Fr. Ted style!

Then I'd go over an wedgie my boss!

Then I'd serve myself lashings and lashings of Guinness!

Then I'd walk around naked.. a lot

free2fly

petes wrote:

You wouldn't go around trying to peek at mens todgers then?

Why would I need to be invisible to do that?

free2fly

Pighead wrote:

What a noble and honorable gesture free2fly. But lets be honest here, you'd get the presents by walking into a toyshop and putting the toys into your invisible bag with the word SWAG written on in invisible ink.

No Pighead. I have the means to purchase the gifts myself. But I just thought of a problem. How would I make the gifts invisible until I delivered them? Would I also have the power to make anything I wanted invisible too?

I like the kick somebody in the butt suggestion. I can think of a few people I'd love to do that too :cool:

Pighead

connundrum wrote:

Then I'd walk around naked.. a lot

Pigheads guessing the invisible girls would be pointing and giggling...a lot.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Mary Harney's bedroom!

Feral Mutant

I once invented an actual invisible cloak. The problem was that while the cloak was invisible, it couldn't make the wearer invisible so it was pretty much useless. Its primary use nowadays is being wrapped around sandwiches to keep them fresh.

Ruu_Old

Apart from Anne Doyle's dressing room then putting 'kick me' signs on peoples backs, lots of chuckles.

magick

id murder everyone i hate ,wait for them in a public place and everyone would freak out at the floating knife/brick strikes again!


or randomly squeeze some random girls boobies while shouting honk honk

EOA_Mushy

Thought to be considered..... Invisibility = % rapists Up & % of boards members allowed access to computers Down :eek:

Pighead

.

Would it not be really hard for a man to pee when he's invisible?

Kinda hard to aim when ya can't see what yer doing.

Erm, I'd pretty much just pull pranks .. everywhere.

Pighead

Deleted User wrote:

Would it not be really hard for a man to pee when he's invisible?

Kinda hard to aim when ya can't see what yer doing.

Erm, I'd pretty much just pull pranks .. everywhere.

You're rubbish at knowing what its like to be invisible! Of course you can see what you're doing ya big eejit. Invisiblity doesn't lead to blindness, it leads to other people not being able to see you. You can see them and everybody else(including yourself) quite clearly. Silly Billy!

Pighead

Pighead wrote:

You're rubbish at knowing what its like to be invisible! Of course you can see what you're doing ya big eejit. Invisiblity doesn't lead to blindness, it leads to other people not being able to see you. You can see them and everybody else(including yourself) quite clearly. Silly Billy!

Ah. My mistake.

I probably wouldn't walk around naked just in case the invisibility wore off. It would be hard to explain being in a womens changing room completely buck-naked.

Lurk

I'd rob stuff.
Perhaps I'd rob everything.
Put it in a big pit and dance around it.
Then I'd rob the pit.

Rhyme

magick wrote:

or randomly squeeze some random girls boobies while shouting honk honk

Owoooogaa!!

Id settle for the little things, moving things on tables in cafés, nudging people gently, blowing the froth off pints etc...

Dave!

Pighead wrote:

You're rubbish at knowing what its like to be invisible! Of course you can see what you're doing ya big eejit. Invisiblity doesn't lead to blindness, it leads to other people not being able to see you. You can see them and everybody else(including yourself) quite clearly. Silly Billy!

Ah but Pighead, you've slipped up here y'see...

Pighead wrote:

Pigheads guessing the invisible girls would be pointing and giggling...a lot.

Being invisible yourself does not mean that you can see other invisible people. That doesn't make sense!

Silly Piggy...!!!

Anyways, if I was invisible, I wouldn't not peek on secsee wimminz getting changed...

Rhyme

Rhyme wrote:

Owoooogaa!!

Id settle for the little things, moving things on tables in cafés, nudging people gently, blowing the froth off pints etc...

Or you could figure out a way to make the straws invisible too and drink the persons pint.

wheelbarrow

..tickle people....

...have fun by keep opening the doors on the Luas / train.

...turn the tv over on the flat mate who hogs the tv...

.....sit in my old school class and go "hummmmmmmmmmm"

...drop the tv on the flat mate who hogs the tv...

...appear ( well not appear ) at my first boards get together....

...go to the fig roll factory....

dr.bollocko

If I were invisible I would concentrate really hard on each approaching luas and see if I could blow it up with my mind.
Like I am doing now.

pbsuxok1znja4r

I'd probably work on researching some kind of cure for my crippling invisibility...

Pighead

DaveMcG wrote:

Ah but Pighead, you've slipped up here y'see...



Being invisible yourself does not mean that you can see other invisible people. That doesn't make sense!

Silly Piggy...!!!

Pighead never said that invisible people could see other invisible people. All I said was that the girls would be pointing and giggling. In my mind they'd be guessing that there would be invisible blokes with small willies wandering about the place. So all thats left to say is IN YOUR FACE McG!

Faith

I'd spend my time opening the doors of cars stuck in traffic, or tapping people on the shoulder in quiet places. It's the small things!

sonic juice

I'd giggle to myself in the mirror then I'd kill kill kill then love love love then go hmmmm 'is this it?'

Tar.Aldarion

Me invisible?


Hide avril, hide!

Lurk

sonic juice wrote:

I'd giggle to myself in the mirror then I'd kill kill kill then love love love then go hmmmm 'is this it?'

Would u be...eh...'loving' the thing u killed?

bluto63

I'd go to a dinner party, with some friends and recreate the scene from Beetlejuice

TerrorFirmer

The Scientist wrote:

I would, like every other red blooded male in the country, and head immediately to a place where full frontal female nudity of some sort is happening. i.e a swimming pool with communal showers(do women do that by the way?). So i think if scientists actaully invent this it wont be available to people like me. or at least it should'nt be available to people like me.

I wasn't actually invisible but I might as well have been, once in the gym the mens showers were out of order so there were massive signs everywhere warning users that the female showers were now for both sexes for a limited while and so all users had to wear bathing suits etc.

Some women didn't seem to actually notice as when I was in the shower, several naked women casually strolled back and forth past my cubicle...

Redrocket

get other invisible mates, and organise some vigilante groups against scumbags.
when some scumbags go to start on innocent bystanders, step in

rogue-entity

If I was invisible, I would get into my car and just drive around, especialy n the waterford bypass where I could drive up behind slow people, blow the horn before indicating and over taking. I could just imagine the look on their face see a car seemingly driving its self

Pigman II

I'd play some air guitar

Houston Griffin

I've actaully given this some thought in the past. I'd take my also invisible spray bottle and go around soaking crotches. How'd my ex-boss explain that during his morning meeting?

Dave!

HavoK wrote:

I wasn't actually invisible but I might as well have been, once in the gym the mens showers were out of order so there were massive signs everywhere warning users that the female showers were now for both sexes for a limited while and so all users had to wear bathing suits etc.

Some women didn't seem to actually notice as when I was in the shower, several naked women casually strolled back and forth past my cubicle...

Thank christ you were wearing your swimming shorts, eh! :eek:

Random

I'd proberly try and find a way to become visible again

sioda

I'd score a try for munster it would be all for me. Then go and find the secret to every secret sauce and publish them.

Dyr

Hang on if only you are invisible then you'd have do all this invisible capering in the nip, and tbh i dont care how much fun invisible capers are being out and about in ireland in october without shoes and bollock naked wont be fun

Sure yed be so cold you wouldnt even have an invisible willy for invisible girls to laugh at, in theory.

Anyway if someone bumped into you and blew the gaff on your little game, they could murder you and no-one would ever find the body...

magnum69

i'd use it to find out what my bf's doing in a day.:cool:

Pighead

magnum69 wrote:

i'd use it to find out what my bf's doing in a day.:cool:

Pigheads no Ricki Lake(unfortunately) but you sound to me like you've got severe trust issues with your boyfriend. Its time to kick him to the kerb honey or else give the brother some goddamn respect. Word.

im_invisible

QUOTE=Pighead
/QUOTE

Pighead

im_invisible wrote:

QUOTE=Pighead
/QUOTE

Thats a cracking point im_invisible.(9/10, fits in beautifully with this thread, mark lost for lack of apostrophe mark in i'm). and beautifully made too. If you really are invisible then you are a credit to your kind.

Katykaboom

Rob a bank probably, the go find all my bullies from school and rough em up. Assasinate bush. wait I shouldnt say that should I after that girl who got dragged out of her class....

Lord Oz

Rob a bank.

Demetrius

Run on a crowded beach barefoot.

bluto63

Katykaboom wrote:

Rob a bank probably, the go find all my bullies from school and rough em up. Assasinate bush. wait I shouldnt say that should I after that girl who got dragged out of her class....

Does it matter? You're invisible!