Wanted: Sidekick

Scraggs

Wanted:
one Sidekick to replace Nerdboy™ 'defender of the weak and nerdy'

This superposter is looking for one Sidekick to replace Nerdboy™ 'defender of the weak and nerdy'

The ideal candidate must be brave and resourceful, possess impeccable timing, willing to rescue the hero from impending doom [if required], possess gusto, have excellent communication and writing skills and the ability to come with a decent catch phrase. Confidentiality is a must and keeping my super-identity a secret is vital. Wearing tights is optional however a uniform must be worn while on duty.

Experience in the following areas while not essential a bonus;
Advertising, secretarial work, personal assistant, get-away-car driving, martial arts, dealing with the media, knowledge of the law and general crime fighting.


Scraggs is an equal opportunities employer.
The successful candidate shall receive a one year contract with option for renewal. Fully comprehensive On & Off the job training shall be provided.
Excellent promotion prospects. Salary negoitable.


Henchmen, minions and lackeys need not apply.
No agencies.

Apply here.

Rabies

I can give you a kick in the side if you want.
One boot or two?

johnny_ultimate

Scraggs wrote:

Wanted:
one Sidekick to replace Nerdboy™ 'defender of the weak and nerdy'

This superposter is looking for one Sidekick to replace Nerdboy™ 'defender of the weak and nerdy'

The ideal candidate must be brave and resourceful, possess impeccable timing, willing to rescue the hero from impending doom [if required], possess gusto, have excellent communication and writing skills and the ability to come with a decent catch phrase. Confidentiality is a must and keeping my super-identity a secret is vital. Wearing tights is optional however a uniform must be worn while on duty.

Experience in the following areas while not essential a bonus;
Advertising, secretarial work, personal assistant, get-away-car driving, martial arts, dealing with the media, knowledge of the law and general crime fighting.


Scraggs is an equal opportunities employer.
The successful candidate shall receive a one year contract with option for renewal. Fully comprehensive On & Off the job training shall be provided.
Excellent promotion prospects. Salary negoitable.


Henchmen, minions and lackeys need not apply.
No agencies.

Apply here.

I don't know about all those skills, but I have a cape. Does that make my eligible?

Ruu_Old

Some want a nerd? No get-away-car but behold...:eek:

DarthWraak

TEAM LASER EXPLOSION!!!
FIRE THUNDER SQUAD!!!
SARCASM STEALTH SQUAD!!!

http://www.weebls-stuff.com/wab/Team+Laser+Explosion/

http://www.weebls-stuff.com/wab/tle+club/

challengemaster

Ruu wrote:

Some want a nerd? No get-away-car but behold...:eek:

class...just class...

Riamfada

so when you are fighting crime Scraggs do you wear just tights to show off those lovely legs?

Dirk Gently

NAME: Unhygienic man
DOB: unknown
PHONE: pm me


I'm currently self employed as resident superhero Defender of Dublin but am willing to do contract work in Carlow seen as it's you.
Here's some action pics of me doing superhero related stuff.


my get away driving skills are second to none.









My superhero belt, always willing to lend a hand or offer a sex toy if your in a DIY kind of mood.
If offered the job I promise to fullfill all duties and I'm not afraid to lick up to the boss.

Matt Holck

most employers don't want to hear about impending doom

Scraggs

Matt Holck you clearly dont cut it!

Anti

I will not be applying for this position.

As i feel it beneth me !

Matt Holck

once you knock them down
disgruntal employee will keep em down
with reapeated kicks to the head


warning: may turn on you

funky penguin

Dental?

dr.bollocko

**** this.
You're the sidekick.
Im not being the sidekick.
You got to be the big spoon, so you're the sidekick.

Baggly

Ill go with everything but the optional tights. In my world tights are never optional

DarkJager

Hmmmmm....think I'd like to be the bad guy!!!

Baggly

Pfft, bad guys dont get to alliterate

DarkJager

I'm sure I could build some massive **** off weapon that could do that for me...

Capt'n Midnight

Does this position come with a career path ?
What are the prospects for promotion apart from the demise of the employer ?

Is overtime time and a half ?
Is there time-in-lieu for weekend work ?

What sort of pension plan is there ( assuming one lives that long )

As an equal opportunity employer do you provide disabled toilets ?

I'd make a great side-kick. In fact, I come with my own catchphrase, which I haven't thought of yet - but it will be smart and whimsical, oh yes, whimsical!

Plus I'm not partial to donning a pair of leggings and cape. Also, my super power include the ability to annoy at 100 paces.

Do I get the job?

funky penguin

Dental?

DarkJager

I have my catchphrase...." Thats a whole barrel of knife wielding mackerel you,ve opened up there Scraggs"

Baggly

I could have a catchphrase.

'oh (for example lets say there is a bad guy called the twizzler) twizzler, will you ever learn'

the crime fighting practically writes itself

DarkJager

I don't know LOTP, that catchphrase would make me vaporise you faster than yellow snow in the depths of hell

Jesus Wept

<

---

I feel I have more of a Supervillain name


I wish to apply for the role of nemesis.

DarkJager

The Rigger? What exactly do you rig, elections? Just messin, maybe we could form a supervillain alliance....call it DARKRIGGER

dr.bollocko

Ok.
Darkjager?
The Rigger?

One is a liquid and the frigging other is a shipyard worker.
I am an evil doctor. Check my profile. All you will ever know about me is that I am, and have been since I signed up for boards, a near mythical supervillian with nipple related psychic abilities.
I have been a nemesis since my college years. I have the experience. I have the smug sense of superiority. I have the masterful punning ability.
I even have one wooden leg. Dammit I ooze sinister appeal.
And you just earned yourself a nemesis. Bitch.

Jesus Wept

dr.bollocko wrote:

Ok.
Darkjager?
The Rigger?

One is a liquid and the frigging other is a shipyard worker.
I am an evil doctor. Check my profile. All you will ever know about me is that I am, and have been since I signed up for boards, a near mythical supervillian with nipple related psychic abilities.
I have been a nemesis since my college years. I have the experience. I have the smug sense of superiority. I have the masterful punning ability.
I even have one wooden leg. Dammit I ooze sinister appeal.
And you just earned yourself a nemesis. Bitch.

too late, that role has been filled, move on.

Baggly

DarkJager wrote:

I don't know LOTP, that catchphrase would make me vaporise you faster than yellow snow in the depths of hell

Giving my superhero justification to kill you. the greater good.

DarkJager

You've just booked yourself a supervillain showdown.....Dr Bollocks!!

Jesus Wept

dr.bollocko wrote:

Ok.
Darkjager?
The Rigger?

One is a liquid and the frigging other is a shipyard worker.
I am an evil doctor. Check my profile. All you will ever know about me is that I am, and have been since I signed up for boards, a near mythical supervillian with nipple related psychic abilities.
I have been a nemesis since my college years. I have the experience. I have the smug sense of superiority. I have the masterful punning ability.
I even have one wooden leg. Dammit I ooze sinister appeal.
And you just earned yourself a nemesis. Bitch.

I do like the idea of having an evil Doctor to work with, where did you get your evil medical degree?

Perhaps you, me, and dark jagger could form an evil alliance.

---


Ok, That's it

I'm forming the first Evil Super Villain Union.



ESVU.

We promise you the best working conditions.

(P.S: This is not an evil alliance, it is simply a union to ensure that all evil supervillains get fair working treatment and benefits).

dr.bollocko

DarkJager wrote:

You've just booked yourself a supervillain showdown.....Dr Bollocks!!

When Im done with you it'll be red whine, dark jager.

DarkJager

Suave...when I'm done with you, you're going to be smelling of anchovies with a bouqet of black roses sticking out of your ass!

dr.bollocko

The-Rigger wrote:

I do like the idea of having an evil Doctor to work with, where did you get your evil medical degree?

Perhaps you, me, and dark jagger could form an evil alliance.

---


Ok, That's it

I'm forming the first Evil Super Villain Union.



ESVU.

We promise you the best working conditions.

I could do with some health insurance. And if I could get out of this shift work and into some sort of part-time nuclear physics course I know I could finish this whole take over the world thing much quicker.

dr.bollocko

DarkJager wrote:

Suave...when I'm done with you, you're going to be smelling of anchovies with a bouqet of black roses sticking out of your ass!

I'll have to take a SHOT in the DARK Jagermeistress and assume that you are new to the supervillian game.
But stick around, and if I don't accidentally kill you whilst raining my atomic nipple milk on every major House of Parliament in the first world I might just help you hone your bollockos.
Now bake me a pie.
Bitch.

Jesus Wept

dr.bollocko wrote:

I could do with some health insurance

you should definitely sign upto my VHI™ scheme

Villain Health Insurance™ (keeping you healthy so you can takeover the world™)

dr.bollocko

The-Rigger wrote:

you should definitely sign upto my VHI™ scheme

Villain Health Insurance™ (keeping you healthy so you can takeover the world™)

Ah yes VHI. How very de rigeur, the rigger.
Muhuhuhahahahahahahahahaha.

DarkJager

Your nipples make me laugh bollocko. You couldn't milk them even if they were 2 litre cartons of semi skimmed with the lids taken off. If you are lucky I might not destroy your house and all of its contents (including you) when I unveil my sinister weapon of mass demise... No pie for you, until you go mow the lawn.....bitch...

Jesus Wept

DarkJager wrote:

Your nipples make me laugh bollocko. You couldn't milk them even if they were 2 litre cartons of semi skimmed with the lids taken off. If you are lucky I might not destroy your house and all of its contents (including you) when I unveil my sinister weapon of mass demise... No pie for you, until you go mow the lawn.....bitch...

touché lololol

dr.bollocko

You have no weapon.
You have no minions.
You have no costume.
You have no super powered nipple, you have no atomic material.
You dont have the soul of a cold-blooded super villain.
How many minions have you sent to their death for your amusement, say, today?
But these things i can teach you. At least it will be amusing to have you around making your puny threats.
I am a supervillain.
Supervillains dont live in houses.
Now shut up and take your bitch medicine.
Bitch.

Star Lord

:rolleyes:
Puny mortals tbh

dr.bollocko

Immortals dont use internet abbreviations, dont use smileys to hand out their wrath and tend not to dress like clowns.
And Damo, the devil is unlikely to be from inner-city dublin.

Star Lord

That's immortal discrimination. We're (immortal) people too ya know!

Oh, and I neither dress like a clown (Didn't stop the joker or IT being evil), nor am I from inner-city Dublin...

boneless

ME!!! PICK ME!!! I can do that and more...

dr.bollocko

DamoElDiablo wrote:

That's immortal discrimination. We're (immortal) people too ya know!

Oh, and I neither dress like a clown (Didn't stop the joker or IT being evil), nor am I from inner-city Dublin...

But there's a picture of your demi-retarded clown features every time you post.
Also your name is damo. therefore you are from inner-city dublin.

DarkJager

Don't make me slap the bitch out of you bollocko... You are simply no match for me...In fact, I dare to say you are simply a poseur....

dr.bollocko

DarkJager wrote:

Don't make me slap the bitch out of you bollocko... You are simply no match for me...In fact, I dare to say you are simply a poseur....

Thanks for sharing child.
you're pretty daring for the most retarded nemesis of mine that has ever existed ever.
Daring for a girly man.
Its a nemesis we're after.
Not a nemesister.
Oh its on.

DarkJager

You are not worthy of being my nemesis Bollocko. In fact you are not even worthy of cleaning the sweat off the back of my ball sack on a hot summers day...

I will say no more to you Bollocko until you have learned the error of your oh so non evil ways....till then, have fun with my "Squirrel Of Death"!

dr.bollocko

Dude Im not into kinky sex toys.
And really not into kinky used sex toys.
I would have had you as a nemesister.
But now I think you're just too weird.
And too 14.

DarkJager

The Squirrel Of Death Is Not A Sex Toy!!!!

Jesus Wept

Minnions? :eek: what is this, 1980?

It's hencemen nowdays



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