Stay out if youre queasy!

NewFrockTuesday

Last night when I was changing, I managed somehow to rip my little fingernail off. I just started in horror before I ran around like a headless chicken.
Today its all wrapped up and has to be changed tonight - the thought of it is giving me pains in my legs. Im on my 3rd neurofen tablet of the day and my typing is even worse and slower than usual!
Ive never really cut my self badly and the worst Ive evr done is fracture a little bone in my ankle....not nearly as disgusting as this.
So,
Whats the worst injury youve managed to inflict on yourself?

Mossy Monk

when i split my groin open, amongst other parts

that was a fun day

Dragan

Split my sternum. That was more of an assault than an accident though.

As for inflicting an injury on myself i tried to skateboard off the roof of a two story house into a wheelie bin.

I made the jump but shattered my left arm, broke some ribs, seperate the abdominal sheet from the lower ribs and knocked myself.

Wasn't really worth it tbh.

Archeron

Double post. Whoops.:

Archeron

I went face first through the window on a Dublin Bus (as in through the actual glass which was toughened, not all the way, but left a lovely face imprint) when the driver braked hard to avoid killing someone who'd fallen under the wheels. I got myself a broken nose, two black eyes, and a chipped tooth. I think I also lost about 10 IQ points.
Not too gorey I admit, but I'm still proud of it :rolleyes:

Huggles

Archeron wrote:

I went face first through the window on a Dublin Bus (as in through the actual glass which was toughened, not all the way, but left a lovely face imprint) when the driver braked hard to avoid killing someone who'd fallen under the wheels. I got myself a broken nose, two black eyes, and a chipped tooth. I think I also lost about 10 IQ points.
Not too gorey I admit, but I'm still proud of it :rolleyes:

Bet you got a few quid for that.

I came off my bicycle when I clipped a van and broke my leg at the ankle, the shin and the thigh, had to have pins in it, beaaaaaaaaaaaautiful it was!

petes

Don't know if it was the worst. I was on a BMX for the first time when I was about seven or eight. Panicked. I was going too fast and before I knew it, I hit a parked car and went literally head over heels. Landed on the other side of the car. Wasn't pleasant.

Archeron

TheGooner wrote:

Bet you got a few quid for that.

I came off my bicycle when I clipped a van and broke my leg at the ankle, the shin and the thigh, had to have pins in it, beaaaaaaaaaaaautiful it was!

Believe it or not, not a penny. I never claimed. A few people were hurt from rolling around the floor, but noone thought to claim. Most were too concerned with the poor girl under the bus (who wasnt hurt) I was only about 6, so I dont think the compo thing was too big then.

Funniest part was, I was with my mum who had a huge cream cake (Flan??) on the seat beside her. When the bus stopped, she went up in the air, the cake slid under her; this was followed by a creamy splash. The driver told us to claim for the cake!!!

Giruilla

A while ago i somehow managed to lean all my bodyweight on a stapler, whilst having my fore finger under it. I was talking to people at the time so, when i felt the sharp pain, i pretended nothing had happenned and walked off to the bathroom. I then looked down and saw that the stable had penetrated the whole way through my finger and was pushing against the underside of my nail. I sorta stood there for about five minutes debating what to do, before i just pulled it out.... somehow managing not to faint.... quite a lot of blood though!

NewFrockTuesday

when i split my groin open, amongst other parts

that was a fun day

May I ask how did you manage that?

I was just reading a post a few days ago - i think it was pighead who said he would rather rip out his fingernails than do whatever was suggested in the thread and I thought it was revolting to read nevermind do.

TerrorFirmer

Dragan wrote:

As for inflicting an injury on myself i tried to skateboard off the roof of a two story house into a wheelie bin.

I made the jump but shattered my left arm, broke some ribs, seperate the abdominal sheet from the lower ribs and knocked myself.

Ouch. Reminds me of the time I trampolined half way across someones gardren whilst under the influence, landing on a concrete paving rather then the grass I was aiming for. Painful time, and was painful for months.

Another time I was cycling along really fast, and tried to do a stylish side into my driveway - ended up sliding a bit too low and splitting my left knee open, that was ouch beyond belief.

Other then that, I've led a happy life.

Endurance Man

Had a rather bad skating accident, cruising down a hill at god knows what speed, caught a speed wobble and ripped my face into many pieces , had to have stitches in a few places. I basically went face first down, best part was my friends standing at the top of the hill rolling around laughing, they weren't laughing when they got to me :S.

BoozyBabe

Awk, I was expecting photos!!!!

The Saint

Managed to staple my finger when I was about six.
Got a sliotar full force in the face once. My face was píssing blood for ages.
Slipped down the stairs in an old flat I was living in and hopped my baby toe off the banaster. I was limping for days. The nail slowly blackened and fell off which was lovely. It grew back though.
There are other things such as falling on broken glass and splitting myself and such. Maybe I should just stay in bed.

Pyr0

Cycling down a road really fast going to school when the chain came off my bike, the pedals flew around and smashed againts my shin, I feel slipped off the sadle and crushed my nuts against the bar. I then bounce on the same bar three times and then smashed into a wall. I had to limp to school while trying to to throw up from the nut crunching. I wouldn't be suprised if I couldn't have children after that.

Funsterdelux

Cycling home from work on a Friday evening, it was a bit drizzly early June, 4 years ago, going round a corner down a nice steep bit, have gone that way a million times just, that time the back wheel slipped, ended up face first on to the road, slid a few feet, thought I did serious damage to my mouth, nose and face, felt something in my mouth, spat it out, oh, half my front tooth, picked it up and walked the rest home, had a look in a side mirror of our car, wasnt as bad as it felt, scary though.
Got a nice scar up me groin also, thats another story.

Sleipnir

Was sitting on a skateboard being pushed as fast as possible and got the wobbles. Put my left hand out to stabilise myself and my friend stood on it and skated along on it for a few seconds. I could see the scrape marks on the bone as there was no skin over it at all for about an inch and a half.

Then there was a rush of blood and I couldn't see the bone anymore!

Morlar

I remember once playing rounders when I was a kid with a tennis ball and a crow bar and then (genius that I am) standing directly behind a mate of mine who managed to knock me out cold.

I landed on the back of my head in hard spiky concrete (where it had been mixed a few days before). So the front and back of my head were in bits. I still remember being wide awake in the hospital with a green sheet over my head while it got stitched up.

Another time stood on a nail that left a wooden plank attached to my foot. One other time jumped out of a tree and didnt bend my knees to see what would happen (dont recommend it). Other time getting a bottle to my eye socket - and a seperate time a cider bottle that chipped a front tooth.

No broken bones though despite 3 car crashes (none driving) on so it could be worse.

Pyr0

Funsterdelux wrote:

Cycling home from work on a Friday evening, it was a bit drizzly early June, 4 years ago, going round a corner down a nice steep bit, have gone that way a million times just, that time the back wheel slipped, ended up face first on to the road, slid a few feet, thought I did serious damage to my mouth, nose and face, felt something in my mouth, spat it out, oh, half my front tooth, picked it up and walked the rest home, had a look in a side mirror of our car, wasnt as bad as it felt, scary though.
Got a nice scar up me groin also, thats another story.

A story you're willing to share I hope

Here's one that happend to a friend of mine a few years back. He was skateboarding on his bed (you know just jumping on the skateboard, flipping it up) and it caught the crotch area of his trousers and some how managed to snag (is that a word?) is pen1s in his zipper. He panicked for a few minutes then gracefully walked into his mam with his little one hanging out with blood all over it. In the end he was circumsised, so the pain continued for a few weeks after. We got a few laughs out of it anyway

Terry

you know those display boards you see in tile shops?
i used to tile them.
one day i was stripping the tiles off the boards (the tiles are held in place with silicone, making it very difficult to remove the tiles), in order to put a new range on and i got pissed off trying to get the remaining bits off the last board.
i stood it against a wall and kicked the middle of the board. it broke in half and the top part came down on my arm and a piece of tile ripped my arm open. needed stitches, but didn't get any. i just got some toilet paper and some tape and made a plaster out of it, because i'm hard like that. left a nice scar.

ThrownAway

Nail pulling off reminds me of that over rated movie I saw this one time about a load of murdering pricks thinking their special because the ''died for their counrty'' :rolleyes:

I was sewing last year and whatever way I put my hand down the needle ended up going right under my nail :eek: It was so painfull I don't think it should be even classed as pain.

Vegeta

Pyr0 wrote:

Here's one that happend to a friend of mine a few years back. He was skateboarding on his bed (you know just jumping on the skateboard, flipping it up) and it caught the crotch area of his trousers and some how managed to snag (is that a word?) is pen1s in his zipper. He panicked for a few minutes then gracefully walked into his mam with his little one hanging out with blood all over it. In the end he was circumsised, so the pain continued for a few weeks after. We got a few laughs out of it anyway

more sounds like a "I was **** upstairs one day and caught my knob in my fly"

Skateboarding on a bed, why was his fly down while he was skateboarding


worst that happened to me was grabbing a a rope and sliding down it in my bare hands, could see bone on 2 fingers, hit in the face with golf ball, hit in the face with a hurley. EDIT: also cut my arm on a lathe cutting tool in school, right across my wrist, I was lucky to avoid the veins

My brother was in school one morning and a solid metal basketball ring+stand fell on his head. The ring stopped the all metal backboard from popping his skull like a spot. He has a nice big scar on his head after it

NewFrockTuesday

Nail pulling off reminds me of that over rated movie I saw this one time about a load of murdering pricks thinking their special because the ''died for their counrty''

Huh?

There had better be a really good explination for that because I hit the enter key with my little finger having managed to avoid doing just that all day.
*cries with pain

GAA widow

Dellgirl2 wrote:

Last night when I was changing, I managed somehow to rip my little fingernail off.

Ugh! Uncomfortable flashback to "The Wind that Shakes the Barley"!

NewFrockTuesday

Ugh! Uncomfortable flashback to "The Wind that Shakes the Barley"!

Ah - I geddit. I havent seen it yet.

GAA widow

Dellgirl2 wrote:

Ah - I geddit. I havent seen it yet.

You'll be thankful it only happened to your baby finger :eek:

Mossy Monk

Dellgirl2 wrote:

May I ask how did you manage that?

a collision with a van. got to spend a week and a half with the old people in IC. the recovery process was the best 3 and a half months of my life

NewFrockTuesday

Ive injured myself again.

Fingernails all intact...the same cannot be said for the burn on my arm from making tunisian orange cake....I burnt myself with the sugar syrup. Its on the soft under wrist bit. Can you burn veins?

This had better taste good. :mad::mad:

taidghbaby

Dellgirl2 wrote: »

Ive injured myself again.

Fingernails all intact...the same cannot be said for the burn on my arm from making tunisian orange cake....I burnt myself with the sugar syrup. Its on the soft under wrist bit. Can you burn veins?

This had better taste good. :mad::mad:

you should be wrapped in bubble wrap for your own safety

the worse i ever did was break a few toes by kicking someones foot!

Birneybau

Messing around with shears as a young lad.Snikety,Snikety,Snikety.Caught myself on both sides of the nose,fairly hard as well.Remember looking in the mirror as the white imprints became red and wet....F'ing sore I tells ya.Hospital please!!

Seachmall

I got one of those disection kits for christmas when I was younger (oh yeah, I was a cool kid!) and tried to catch a spider. Suddenly the spider turned and ran for me, I freaked and in the rush of it all I stapped myself in the face with a scalpel. It was about an inch from my eye, but it wasn't too deep. I don't have much of a scar left.

Krsnik87

Top 3 would be:

- Falling off a wall and shattered my front teeth off the corner on the way down.

- Was fighting over a mop while hammered at a party, I somehow ended up arse over tit and snapped my collar bone with the bone popping out, its still not back in place.

- Not one of my ouchies but I inflicted it on someone else: I was after gettin punched in the face by my older bro and hit the deck. he went to jump on me and I lifted up my foot and caught him square in the nuts, held him there for a second or 2 before he dropped off to the side. He didn't move, couldn't even make a noise he was in so much pain. He had to take 2 days off school cause he was pissing blood...

Still feel bad about that one...

NewFrockTuesday

Messing around with shears as a young lad.Snikety,Snikety,Snikety.Caught myself on both sides of the nose,fairly hard as well.Remember looking in the mirror as the white imprints became red and wet....F'ing sore I tells ya.Hospital please!!

What do you mean? You gave yourself a Chelsea nose/cheek? :eek:

you should be wrapped in bubble wrap for your own safety

Agreed. Although some dates Ive been on would probably steal that bubblewrap if they had known what was coming. I set a menu on fire leaning over a candle and shook it to put it out and ended up fireballing the poor guy.
Another fell off Howth Pier and on another date when I was dancing (I use the term loosely) I spiked his toe and defo heard a crunch. he didnt let on the soldier, but I know I done some damage - just not sure how serious.....I didnt follow up that one. (Why did I agree to Salsa? Im the worst dancer in Ireland)

My wrist is really hurting. Its ragin ghot and too sore to hold under water. Time to route out the Solphadine I think.

NewFrockTuesday

- Was fighting over a mop while hammered at a party,

No wimmins at this party?

Mimikyu

This post has been deleted.

Mena

Most disgusting for me was having a lightbulb blow up in my face and take out an eye. That was some sick "%£%.

Most painful is between tearing all the ligaments in my ankle (drunken wall jumping) and sticking my head through my windscreen at 120Kph after some bint jumped a traffic light.

Duggy747

Let's see,

I stabbed myself above the knee with a pencil quite deeply. It's sorta hard to explain how I did it but I didn't get the lead removed until about 5 years later.

I was climbing over a 8ft fence, I'm only 6ft something, hand gets caught on a sharp thing poking out on the top, I continue to fall.........cue hand ripped wide open, skin from my middle finger comes off and hangs off my hand like a cloth, nerves sliced to side of ring finger causing numbness.

Me hand got put back together with the help of 40 stitches and a doctor who says half-way through "Norm-al-lee we git a hand surgeon for thees kind of surge-a-ree!!" :eek:

Hand is back to normal and I got this big scar running down the middle of my hand............makes me look dangerous :pac:

NewFrockTuesday

Most disgusting for me was having a lightbulb blow up in my face and take out an eye. That was some sick "%£%.

We have a winner!!! :eek:

I'm only 6ft something

Haha! Only...

taidghbaby

Dellgirl2 wrote: »

Agreed. Although some dates Ive been on would probably steal that bubblewrap if they had known what was coming. I set a menu on fire leaning over a candle and shook it to put it out and ended up fireballing the poor guy.
Another fell off Howth Pier and on another date when I was dancing (I use the term loosely) I spiked his toe and defo heard a crunch. he didnt let on the soldier, but I know I done some damage - just not sure how serious.....I didnt follow up that one. (Why did I agree to Salsa? Im the worst dancer in Ireland)

My wrist is really hurting. Its ragin ghot and too sore to hold under water. Time to route out the Solphadine I think.

is your name francesca spencer??

Birneybau

Dellgirl2 wrote: »

What do you mean? You gave yourself a Chelsea nose/cheek? :eek:


Yeah,so scars though.

Pyr0

Oh when I was 12 I managed to drop a De-fat fryer all over my legs, it had only been turned off for about 15 minutes. Lots of screaming and panick, called the ambulance and the firebrigade tagged along too. Got it wrapped up in the hospital, went back a day or two later to get my bandage changed, looked down at my leg to find it covered in yellow blisters they were big massive things too ! I started to cry when they told me they only way to get rid of them was to burst them with a needle and squeeze the water out...

NewFrockTuesday

Ok...this is in quick succession, but I think one of my bottom teeth at the back just imploded. Was in pain and now....IN SEVERE PAIN! It looks like its all still there but I def felt a big "pop" and the tooth feels ...there and fizzy. Its like my tooth had an orgasm! wtf? :eek:

Pass the bubble wrap.

Big Knox

Split my head open off a concrete step which had to be stapled back together.
Ripped the entire length of my inner thigh on a rusty nail jumping out of a tree which required 28 stitches.
Broke 3 bones in my foot, my finger, my elbow and dislocated my shoulder.
Got a wooden deckchair smashed off my face which knocked out a tooth and broke my nose pretty bad causing the bridge to move to one side.
But by far the worst was standing on a pint glass which went up through my foot, severed 3 tendons and caused alot of the bottom of my foot to fall out in the centre of the wound while it was healing (which took over 3 months) and as a result I have no strength in my foot and have since damaged ligaments in that ankle 4 times, each time the damage getting progressivly worse.

Yes there all true and yes im an idiot but whatever doesen't kill you will make you stronger and all that... :pac:

Theres probably more but thats all I can think of right now.

Big Knox

Also just seen this today.

http://www.break.com/index/wall-falls-on-dudes-leg.html

That's gonna leave a mark!! :eek:

antodeco

Dellgirl2 wrote: »

Ok...this is in quick succession, but I think one of my bottom teeth at the back just imploded. Was in pain and now....IN SEVERE PAIN! It looks like its all still there but I def felt a big "pop" and the tooth feels ...there and fizzy. Its like my tooth had an orgasm! wtf? :eek:

Pass the bubble wrap.

AN orgasming tooth? Giggidy giggidy!! Maybe the tooth just popped out of the gum. Might become loose over the next 24 Hours!

Things happened to me:

- 2 inch scar (not really visible anymore) over my left eye from landing headfirst on top of a wall.
- Having my little finger "explode". Got crushed between 2 skateboards, nerve popped out and was hanging out for quite a while. Still scarred.
- Smashed all my front teeth playing what I now call "head butt chasing". Actually, that whole "butt chasing" seems wrong!!
- Fell and hit my head on the ground. A stone got stuck in my forehead for a few days. Was fairly manky, but I felt cool.
- Playing football and the goalie came out. Knees first in the air, right into my nose. Blood everywhere, cartilidge too. Nose is still perfect though!
- Most painful was when an ant bit me between my toes. Hopped around for hours. I went ballistic ripping up the room to kill that little fecking ant.