Would you ever get married?

LundiMardi

I personally, no matter who I’m with, can never see myself getting married, the sacrament itself holds no meaning to me and it is not at all appealing. Would you get married?

I find it soo funny that the minority don’t practise their organised religion (Catholicism) however the majority get married. Why is that?

rondeco

em, just did....

Femelade

i cant wait to get married.
just have to find the right guy first.

edit/ congrats rondeco!

Heinrich

Marriage is a legal contract between men and women. It is not necessarily a religious thing.


Registry offices and Gambling Casino offshots are for that purpose also.:D

ST*

LundiMardi wrote:

I find it soo funny that the minority don’t practise their organised religion (Catholicism) however the majority get married. Why is that?

True, few actually do practice. but I think people do it for the commitment++ side of things.

LegacyUser

I like the idea of the big day, and it seems right to be married when having children (I am somewhat traditional)
I know that it shows a high level of committment too.
But financially it makes no sense at all!

xzanti

I wouldn't consider myself a practicing catholic but I would get married... Not for the religious aspect of it but more as a gesture to tell the other person that I’m planning to spend the rest of my life with them... I don’t think it would matter to me if the person was of a different religion either... I would happily get married in a registry office...

Kojak

Heinrich wrote:

Registry offices and Gambling Casino offshots are for that purpose also.:D

A nice bit of modern thinking there.

I couldn't see myself getting married, but I did say that I couldn't see myslef going to college - now I am in 4th year, so you never know.

mise_me_fein_V2

I will hopefully. Might have to buy one though - just joking.

I like the idea of being in my 60s being married and relaxing with grandkids.

I know you might be able to do that without getting married, but if you take
the traditional thing out of it, then the whole thing goes to fcuk I think.

I don't like the thought of being alone in my 60s at all.

Maximilian

Marriage = Insurance Policy for women (a fortiori those women who don't want to work/have sprogs). I've seen first hand (well, ok second hand maybe) how men get utterly shafted in divorce/legal seperation proceedings.

Can someone please explain how marriage is of any benefit whatsoever to a man?

Heyes

I'm definately a traditionalist at heart, i would like to think that in the future i will get married and have kiddies. As above i dont think marrige is predominantly about a religious point of view, i think its more so a showing of commitment to your partner, and also acknowledging to them that you would like to enjoy your life and experiences with that one person.

Also having a religon does not always mean that you have to be on your knees praying every Sunday, its more so a matter of belief and way of doing things. Id say most people all be it dont attend mass, still believe in something.

Feenikusu

I think if I find the right guy I'll want to marry, but only in a registry office, I'm not at all religious and I would hate it to be a bride and everyone's staring at me....naaah.

Owen

I would never get married. I don't believe in the Catholic Church, or any other Religion, but more to the point, I don't see the need to spend 20 grand on one day out, and feel trapped for the rest of your life. I've every intention of finding someone special, and spending the rest of my life with them, but I don't need a ring on my finger, or a piece of paper to prove that to me.

Give it another 50 years, marriage won't be as big an issue as it is now. Society is evolving.

phantom_lord

Maybe. "It's the whole forever and ever and ever and ever*trails off...*" part that scares me...

madhitchhiker

Maximilian wrote:

Can someone please explain how marriage is of any benefit whatsoever to a man?

The health benefits of being married are so large that single men are at greater risk of dying than smokers, says a study. This is partly because of the "social support" of having a wife or husband - and perhaps because both single men and women have a worse lifestyle - and no-one to look out for their wellbeing.

dudara

I'd like to be married, because of the commitment. I am getting married in a civil ceremony though, religion plays no part in my life.

Lux23

I think most women just want a wedding rather then a husband. I think if I would prefer to be a common law wife.

DBK

I'm getting married this year. Not going with the religious thing though as I don't believe in all that, it's going to be done by Elvis in Las Vegas.

100gSoma

I'd consider Marriage for Civil reasons. bigger Tax Free Allowances etc.
Religion plays no part.

galwaydude

I would say i do considering im getting married in 52 days in the states. Moving over in 7 days. Let the good times begin. Congrats rondeco btw

Possibly. I don't know.
I'm not a christian so registry office for me.
I'd do it for stuff like visitation rights in hospitals? as well as the actual commitment thing

Beruthiel

LundiMardi wrote:

I personally, no matter who I’m with, can never see myself getting married, the sacrament itself holds no meaning to me and it is not at all appealing. Would you get married??

are you aware of the fact that in ireland, if you were to buy a house with your partner and you died, they have to pay an inheritance tax that your wife/husband doesn't have to.
in saying that, I'm divorced and won't be doing that again....

Peace

I'd have to run the figures on a tax basis, but assuming it comes out in my favour, then yes i would get married.

Also if i was to have a child, I would have less than zero rights as a father to my child.

ST*

Whoever said romance was dead eh?

BoozyBabe

Can't wait to get married.
Think I've met Mr Right, but the marriage part is well in the future at the mo.

As others have said:- for me it's not about the religion, it's about the significance of what it says to your partner, that you're ready to commit to them for life.


BTW, Where's the Poll?

LundiMardi

Beruthiel wrote:

are you aware of the fact that in ireland, if you were to buy a house with your partner and you died, they have to pay an inheritance tax that your wife/husband doesn't have to.
in saying that, I'm divorced and won't be doing that again....

fair enough, i would consider that reason enough to get married, provided i was with the right person. But it's not really the right reason is it?

Pigman II

Marriage = sure, why not. It's a day out.

Kids = hell no. I think you should have 100k in burning a hole in your pocket before you even consider it.

booth

25, just ended a 5-year realtionship, largely because she wanted to get married and have kids while I wasn't ready. I have always said that I would have kids no prob if I had a large amt of money in the bank. Nice to see someone else has the same opinion Pigman.

Getting married is a horrible thing that women dream about from the age of 5 onwards. Seriously... why. It's not even the committment for some people. It's pure hedonistic thoughts of being the centre of attention in a beautiful white dress. Obviously not everyone thinks like this but when you don't practice or believe in the religion why would you regard one of its main sacrements so highly. It lulls people into a false sense of security anyway. If a person is comitted it they shouldn't need symbols to prove it. The comittment alone should be symbol enough.

Congrats to everyone who is married though but I hope you all realise that you didn't need 2 pieces of precious metal and a white dress to show the other person how much they mean to you.

Mr Magnolia

Poll, TBH


I'm married already, as of last year. I'm not all that religious, so, for me, it was all about symbolism and commitment.

Beruthiel wrote:

won't be doing that again....

marraige or divorce B?

BoozyBabe

I do agree with a lot of what you said Booth, but like you I'm 25, & not long out of a 5 year relationship, & a 4 years one before that.

If I'd have been married I don't think I'd have walked away (as apart from me feeling slightly bored there was nothing wrong with the relationship), whereas the fact that there was no ring & no piece of paper I didn't feel there was anything wrong with walking away.

That's why I feel that marriage signifies more commitment. If (when) I say 'I Do' to someone, I'm saying I'm never going to walk away from you (Yes, I know there's still a chance that I will........., but I'd try an awful lot harder NOT to walk becaues we're 'married')

It's probably just a silly idea in my head that the rest don't share, but it just means that bit more to me than 2 partners 'living' together for the rest of their lives. Living together makes me think more like: I love you, but not enough to call my own

LundiMardi

BoozyBabe wrote:

I do agree with a lot of what you said Booth, but like you I'm 25, & not long out of a 5 year relationship, & a 4 years one before that.

If I'd have been married I don't think I'd have walked away (as apart from me feeling slightly bored there was nothing wrong with the relationship), whereas the fact that there was no ring & no piece of paper I didn't feel there was anything wrong with walking away.

That's why I feel that marriage signifies more commitment. If (when) I say 'I Do' to someone, I'm saying I'm never going to walk away from you (Yes, I know there's still a chance that I will........., but I'd try an awful lot harder NOT to walk becaues we're 'married')

It's probably just a silly idea in my head that the rest don't share, but it just means that bit more to me than 2 partners 'living' together for the rest of their lives. Something like I love you, but not enough to call my own

that really is silly, no offence.

BoozyBabe

Yea, I know, it probably is.

But not to me, & that's what's important.

Marriage means different things to different people & that's what it means to me & I know that's what it means to my partner as well.

no offence taken

Sleepy

Wouldn't have a problem getting married to the right person but I'd be ultra cautious about who I would marry.

The laws of this country make it scary either way for a guy: don't marry the woman and you have no rights whatsover regarding your own children, marry her and you risk being left broke with very few rights regarding your kids.

If I do ever find a woman I could trust enough I'd like to marry in an exotic location of some kind. A civil ceremony in the ruins of an ancient Cambodian temple or something like that. I'd do the religious thing if it was very important to the person I was marrying but all concerned would know my feelings on religion.

Peace

Marriage isn't even commitment for life now, sure 6months gets you a divorce now..

Kojak

Peace wrote:

Marriage isn't even commitment for life now, sure 6months gets you a divorce now..

Look at Britney Spears. She got one in 3 hours.

meowCat

I think marriage is all about making that big commitment. People want to believe in their relationship being special and what bigger statement could you make about your relationship than getting married.

Also, I believe guys generally like the idea just as much as girls, but would never admit it openly, because there's this whole girly thing going with weddings...the dress...the flowers...etc. So, it seems uncool for a guy to say you can see yourself getting married one day.

On a rational level it seems totally crazy to get married of course. But that's not the point.

DaBreno

Wedding used to be the big thing, not any more. Every couple I know buys a house together now. Thats the new engagement. Marrige is something that happens a few years after when we scrape a few bob together.
Its a good way to do it too. Live with each other, see what its like and if it doesnt work out, youve made a few bob on a house. Marrige brings no change, only formalises an existing arrangement.
As for Kids, thats the truly life changing decision.

Larianne

If I ever get married it will be on a beach in Tahiti. And if it goes all pear-shaped well at least I got a nice holiday out of it!

grimsbymatt

For me, marriage is essentially pointless. But, it means an awful lot to my girlfriend and she means an awful lot to me. Therefore, transitively, marriage is actually very important to me(!)

So one day, when the time's right, I'll propose.

justsomebloke

meowCat wrote:

On a rational level it seems totally crazy to get married of course. But that's not the point.

that really is so true..

I have to say i believe that marriage is something very special and something that people unfortuanlty don't take seriously any more. I probably will get married however i wouldn't get married until i am at least 30 as i feel that i am still maturing and growing at that point so if i was to marry before that, that but myself and my wife would grow up to be different people who no long share the same ideals as when we got married.
I am currently going out with someone for 8 years and probably will end up marrying her (shhhh don't tell her;) ). but i want to wait to make sure that she is still be teh one for me when we both of done the growing and maturing we need to do

BoozyBabe

jsb wrote:

I am currently going out with someone for 8 years and probably will end up marrying her (shhhh don't tell her;) ). but i want to wait to make sure that she is still be teh one for me when we both of done the growing and maturing we need to do

Jeez, can you really see yourself wakening up some morning after 8/10 years & say "oh I've just found out something about you that I didn't know before that I don't like. Goodbye!!"

I'm not saying your view is wrong or anything, I just think for me:- going with someone 8 years is defo long enough to know whether or not they're the one (& if I've put 8 years into it, chances are they are) & would be ready for marriage.

I know everyone's different, but it would seem such a waste to me to end something after SO long.
(I know you didn't say you would or anything, but the holding off until you're in your 30's suggests you might!)

babaduck

booth wrote:

25, just ended a 5-year realtionship, largely because she wanted to get married and have kids while I wasn't ready.

booth wrote:

Getting married is a horrible thing that women dream about from the age of 5 onwards. Seriously... why. It's not even the committment for some people. It's pure hedonistic thoughts of being the centre of attention in a beautiful white dress. .

Oh dear, quite the little cynic:cool:

At the age of 25, very few people are emotionally mature enough to make a life commitment like marriage & I firmly believe that you should wait till you're at least 30 before you decide to take the plunge. I spent half of my 20's single & on the p*ss with the girls, sampling the delights on offer, before meeting the husband & over time deciding that this was where I wanted to be. We took our time, bought the house and saved to have a wedding we both wanted - no white dress extravaganza for us, although it was a v. traditional ceremony and reception. More to the point, it was a day when we stood up in front of everybody we cared about and told them that IT'S FOR KEEPS.

To us, it was all about our commitment to each other and making it permanent. On a more unromantic level, it stabilises your financial position and inheritance/tax rights, and 18 months into the big M, I've honestly never been happier.:D

justsomebloke

BoozyBabe wrote:

I'm not saying your view is wrong or anything, I just think for me:- going with someone 8 years is defo long enough to know whether or not they're the one (& if I've put 8 years into it, chances are they are) & would be ready for marriage.
QUOTE]

no what i was saying is that people change and people genearlly change the most before they are 30 as they are still deciding what they want with their life and sometimes this can be quite different to what the partner feels and so no amount of love can bridge that gap. Alot of people don't take change into consideration before they get married and so this is why there is such a high divorce rate as people don't take marriage as seriously as it should be taken as i feel if i get married that should be the person i spend the rest of my life with.

justsomebloke

babaduck wrote:

On a more unromantic level, it stabilises your financial position and inheritance/tax rights, and 18 months into the big M, I've honestly never been happier.:D

and you said romance was dead:D

Tar.Aldarion

I'm sure I will, just not now and not religious thanks.

millivanilli

i wouldn't get married for religious reasons but for security and financial reasons and as well i like the idea of promising to stay with one person forever, i think its romantic. if you just live with someone for years its easier to end it and just walk away but i think if you're married you would be more inclined to try and work at it, especially if you had kids. i hate the idea of a big huge wedding though and wearing a giant white dress and everyone staring at you.id go away somewhere lovely to get married and then just have a big party when i got back.

Misticles

i will get married, most definitely. neither me or my partner have any religious inclinations but id still want the church wedding. id never do it in a casino or registry office, it just wouldnt seem right. call me a hypocrite but thats my take on it.

mad m

Have the T-Shirt for 8years now.Dont get married people.Ahem I mean do get married.


Wife checksout boards.:D

Dave!

Yeah I'd like to get married at some time in the future... Probably when I'm ~30.

Dunno why, it just seems like a natural course of action. I don't consider it particularly religious, despite the fact that it IS a religious ceremony; it's more a traditional thing IMO. It just seems normal.

Firewalkwithme

I'm getting married in June in a civil ceremony so it has nothing at all to do with religion for me.

Sleepy

What I can't understand is how someone can get married casually. Why leave yourself that open for a financial raping?