Waiting for him to call

DawnMc

Hi all!
Just a bit of a rant/advice needed!
I went out on Sunday night and had a great night. I was sick of the whole score a guy for the night type of thing so I was just bopping away on the dancfloor with my friends. I ended up chatting to (and eventually kissing) this really nice guy. I've met a lot of guys in clubs but I really seemed to click with him. I think anyways. I gave him my number. That was Sunday, it's now Tuesday..... should I have heard from him by now? What is the norm for a fella to wait?

And why on EARTH do blokes take your number if they have no intention of using it???

tman

for all you know, he's trying to play it cool.
whenever i stupidly attempted this, i'd leave it until the middle/end of the week before getting in touch.
give him a few days, then give up.

/edit
or... wait for it...
try calling him

DawnMc

I suppose it is only Tuesday - dunno why it's getting to me so much - it's just I really clicked with him I think!

How long would you wait before texting a girl?

projectmayhem

also, if he was super drunk, he might not even remember it!

tman

tman wrote:

for all you know, he's trying to play it cool.
whenever i stupidly attempted this, i'd leave it until the middle/end of the week before getting in touch.
give him a few days, then give up.

/edit
or... wait for it...
try calling him

Bit difficult if she gave him her number and not vice versa.

dawn, I'd just forget about it and move on. Seriously. That way if he does call it's a nice surprise, and if not, you've moved on.

Canis Lupus

Give me your number and I'll call ya straight away.....collect tho cos I'm a cheapskate.

constitutionus

projectmayhem wrote:

also, if he was super drunk, he might not even remember it!

yup, many's a time i had to check the old notes section of me mobile to see what i was up to the night before. you girls DO have a habit of waiting till were monkey drunk to come up to us which doesnt exactly help the matter:D

personally though id have text the next day just to see how her head was but thats just me ,im not into all these "the rules" head games nonsense:D

irlrobins

One girl I went out with once had this opinion:

That if a guy spent a good while chatting her up or kissed her then he should ask for her number, even if he had no intention of calling her and it would be very rude of him if he didn't.

And if a guy did ask for her number she'd decide to either give him the real one if she liked him or a fake one if she didn't.

Talk about mind games!

Also for my present gf, the first night i met her I asked for her number. As soon as she gave it to me I rang it while she was standing right by me. She asked me why I did that and I said that I wanted to be sure that she wasn't giving me a fake number as I really wanted to call her the next day. She loved that!

(And yes I called....;) )

0utshined

DawnMc wrote:

How long would you wait before texting a girl?

You got to wait two days. It's like industry standard. Unless you're money, then you have to wait at least three. I wait six.

Exon

Is it possible to meet someone who doesn't play games? Who rings ya when they feel like it etc. People are starting to act the eejit in Ireland.

Nevyn

Ego boost tbh.
I know a few guys who go out get 5 to 10 numbers of girls and never ever use them or ever intended to use them.
Hell I know two guys who do it as a competition between themsleves for giggles while out on the beer.

Dawn it could be that he is waiting until thursday to get intouch to see what you will be doing at the weekend.
If you had been on a date and he had not gotten in touch reason enough to wonder but he was just some guy in a bar.

py2006

One of the worst things that can happen as a bloke is getting the phone number from a really nice girl and then loosing it!

I remember getting a really nice girls number last year. I am absolutely positive I texted it to myself when I entered it into the phone. I think I must have cleared some of my messages without thinking the next day!

I usually txt the girl the next day. It would kill me to have to wait a few days!

AngryBadger

probably adhering to the oh-so-stupid "2 day" rule, or whatever number of days they've changed it to. can't really blame the guy, almost every girl I';ve ever discussed the stupidity of this "rule" with swears by it

py2006

Sure if you called a girl straight away these days they would probably say oh he is too keen.

Exon

She'll think you're too keen untill you don't ring her again when ya get your hole

AngryBadger

py2006 wrote:

Sure if you called a girl straight away these days they would probably say oh he is too keen.

*shrug* I wouldn't lose too much sleep about it py, not our fault if they can't spot a keeper

rsta

hey dawn
if hes going to call he'll call, you r just so keen for him to ring cos you like him.
just relax and forget about it its all u can do, so dont be jumping every time your phone beeps thinking that it could be him!
i hope he calls cos u like him, but if he likes u i wouldnt be suprised if he leaves it til thurs or even friday...

one fella i was with on a night out got my no. i liked him but wasnt too interested, but anyway he didnt call til about a week and a half later!! i really wasnt expecting it id forgot about him.. .. but to me he was just a good mooch on night out so i didnt hook up with him agan.

ando

py2006 wrote:

Sure if you called a girl straight away these days they would probably say oh he is too keen.

damn you sex and the city

Tiriel

I think a guy (or girl) should text when they want to.. no games and no mind-numbing over analysis of "what will she think.. etc." Personally.. I respect a guy who is straight-talking. So.. act on your instincts guys.. if she likes you it really won't matter a hoot if you wait 2 days.. but it will matter if you wait too long.. as she will have gotten bored of your silly game!!

DAEDULUS

DawnMc wrote:

Hi all!
Just a bit of a rant/advice needed!
I went out on Sunday night and had a great night. I was sick of the whole score a guy for the night type of thing so I was just bopping away on the dancfloor with my friends. I ended up chatting to (and eventually kissing) this really nice guy. I've met a lot of guys in clubs but I really seemed to click with him. I think anyways. I gave him my number. That was Sunday, it's now Tuesday..... should I have heard from him by now? What is the norm for a fella to wait?

And why on EARTH do blokes take your number if they have no intention of using it???

lol and here I am just a thread away giving this as advice to some kid
You probably hate me for it but its a good thing no matter what :P

Ickle Magoo

OP,

He may be playing it cool, he may have lost your number, he may have no intention of ever calling you, or any of the other suggestions as to why he hasn't contacted you mentioned above.....I, personally, never have much faith in drunken snogs and numbers exchanged in night clubs, but that's just me....not a lot you can do other that wait it out, I'm afraid....all the best

fiobs

A day-after-text is very eager. I think alot of guys would wait for two days (ie. tonight) to text.

Loomis

People really ****in annoy me!
God forbid you could like someone and want to contact.But that makes you sad,needy and eager.So there's no ****in winning with people nowadays.

If you liked the guy you should have gotten his number too.At least that way you could get in touch if you wanted.And hey you could have entered into the mind-games ****e with a little message something along the lines of..."wasn't sure if I got your number right so just checking with this text"
You know for future reference anyway.

*kills everyone around him*

irlrobins

fiobs wrote:

A day-after-text is very eager. I think alot of guys would wait for two days (ie. tonight) to text.

Bollix, I'd send a text the next day. Something simple like "How's the head today?" Something non commital.

If I'm interested in a girl I'm not going to wait two days. If she's not interested I'd rather find out sooner than later. And if she's so petty that she considers contacting someone before two days are up as a sign of desperation than fuck her.

Miss Fluff

If he wants to hook up next weekend, he'll probably call you Thursday. Hope he does chick

nomorebadtown

right well i got a girls number last night, she seemed bang on and quite the fox. we were just chatting and had a bit of a dance, no petting, heavy or otherwise.

i had to leave and wanted to ask for her number but the music was too loud so i wrote "can i have your number?" on my phone and showed it to her. she took my phone and wrote "maybe" but as i was in a hurry i just had to say "listen, eh...i need to leave" so then she wrote her name and number and saved them to my phone. nice. so just a kiss on the cheek and i left.

now, taking all the crazy mind game rules into account...when do i make contact?

irlrobins

I'd send her a text now saying "sorry for leaving in a rush last night, didn't mean to be rude. Hope you got home ok?" or something like that. Just a friendly text, nothing too full on.

Loomis

nomorebadtown wrote:

right well i got a girls number last night, she seemed bang on and quite the fox. we were just chatting and had a bit of a dance, no petting, heavy or otherwise.

i had to leave and wanted to ask for her number but the music was too loud so i wrote "can i have your number?" on my phone and showed it to her. she took my phone and wrote "maybe" but as i was in a hurry i just had to say "listen, eh...i need to leave" so then she wrote her name and number and saved them to my phone. nice. so just a kiss on the cheek and i left.

now, taking all the crazy mind game rules into account...when do i make contact?

Ask her to your family home for Valentine's...

Nah go for common sense.If you liked the girl contact her and see what she thinks.Don't play games.They're for people who are too caught up with pretentions and appearances.Oh ye and insecurity

Jack B. Badd

Mr. Anderson wrote:

People really ****in annoy me!
God forbid you could like someone and want to contact.But that makes you sad,needy and eager.So there's no ****in winning with people nowadays.

I say through caution and dignity to the wind and stop playing games! They are too stupid and ultimately confusing as hell! That said, I get very angry with myself for texting/calling someone I like too often...no winning, eh?

py2006

Jack B. Badd wrote:

I get very angry with myself for texting/calling someone I like too often...no winning, eh?

I hear ya buddy! Been there done that with 3 different women last year! Never again!

Jack B. Badd

py2006 wrote:

I hear ya buddy! Been there done that with 3 different women last year! Never again!

I usually run with the assumption that the bloke in question won't notice the stupid crush and just think I'm psychotically friendly or summink.

py2006

Jack B. Badd wrote:

I usually run with the assumption that the bloke in question won't notice the stupid crush and just think I'm psychotically friendly or summink.

Yep, thats what I get! I get the "oh he is such a nice guy", but nothing ever comes of it if you text/call alot! Just seems to slip into the friends zone!

Ickle Magoo

py2006 wrote:

Yep, thats what I get! I get the "oh he is such a nice guy", but nothing ever comes of it if you text/call alot! Just seems to slip into the friends zone!

Ah, yes...there is a fine line between keenness & stalking, lol! :D

irlrobins

py2006 wrote:

Yep, thats what I get! I get the "oh he is such a nice guy", but nothing ever comes of it if you text/call alot! Just seems to slip into the friends zone!

Well there's texting/calling and then there's plain OTT/stalking/hounding texting/calling.

you should send a few texts then a couple of calls to sus out how she feels and then make a move, ask her out for a drink or whatever. If you never go beyond texting/calling then she's bound to lose interest.

Tobias Greeshman

py2006 wrote:

Yep, thats what I get! I get the "oh he is such a nice guy", but nothing ever comes of it if you text/call alot! Just seems to slip into the friends zone!

Yeah the friends zone/"Nice Guy" syndrome is a bit of a bitch alright. Perhaps next time take the bull by the horns so to speak, text her a day or two after meeting with her, text her or whatever and meet up with her next weekend. Go out, get drunk with her + friends and ask her out.

Or text/call her for a few days and bite the bullet and just ask her out. Be careful with playing it too cool.

py2006

Well yes, you need to do more than just text/call! But I have found that if you ask to go out for drinks too often it can slip into friendship more than a relationship!

You have to show your interest but not too much! If your too keen you can scare them away and if your not keen enough they loose interest!

irlrobins

py2006 wrote:

But I have found that if you ask to go out for drinks too often it can slip into friendship more than a relationship!

Well do you go out for drinks or do you jsut ask and get refused?

galah

or (in answer to the original post - and I know it sounds cruel) - he might just not be that interested after all...

The Corinthian

DawnMc wrote:

I was sick of the whole score a guy for the night type of thing

...

I ended up chatting to (and eventually kissing) this really nice guy.

Well, you seemed to have recovered quickly enough.

And why on EARTH do blokes take your number if they have no intention of using it???

Because it seems like a good idea when drunk.

py2006

irlrobins wrote:

Well do you go out for drinks or do you jsut ask and get refused?

Well yea we go out for drinks! If I get turned down then I don't bother with her again unless of course we are at that friends stage!

irlrobins

ah right, well we all know the "you're a nice guy, let's be friends" = "I have no interest in ever kissing you".



Just like "It's not you, it's me" = "It's definitely you, you and your fat ass"

:v:

py2006

irlrobins wrote:

ah right, well we all know the "you're a nice guy, let's be friends" = "I have no interest in ever kissing you".



Just like "It's not you, it's me" = "It's definitely you, you and your fat ass"

:v:

haha don't go there! Alot of hot headed women on these threads!

Jack B. Badd

py2006 wrote:

haha don't go there! Alot of hot headed women on these threads!

Oi! I totally agree with the statement. Hot headed women indeed! In all fairness though, would you prefer to hear, "you're a nice bloke, let's be mates" or "I wouldn't touch ya with a ten foot barge pole!"?

constitutionus

Jack B. Badd wrote:

Oi! I totally agree with the statement. Hot headed women indeed! In all fairness though, would you prefer to hear, "you're a nice bloke, let's be mates" or "I wouldn't touch ya with a ten foot barge pole!"?

true, and mates can eventually lead to friend sex. not as good as a propper relationship, but not bad either:D

Jack B. Badd

constitutionus wrote:

true, and mates can eventually lead to friend sex. not as good as a propper relationship, but not bad either:D

Friend sex, you say? Interesting concept.

Roy16

I think it swings in round abouts as im sure most blokes will agree that they offten give there number but never hear either. I have to be honest here though and dont mean to be rude, if he was going to call or even contact you, im sure he would have at least sent you a txt the next day as i most would prob do. Maybe he isn't single and has a girlfriend or maybe he got the wrong number. To be honest if you dont hear from him by the weekend, move on and just choose more wisley next time.

nomorebadtown

irlrobins wrote:

I'd send her a text now saying "sorry for leaving in a rush last night, didn't mean to be rude. Hope you got home ok?" or something like that. Just a friendly text, nothing too full on.

well i did as you advised.

result?

no ****ing reply, thanks alot dude:mad:

of course that could mean that its a fake number or she had her beer goggles on and thought better of it the next day. why didnt she just refuse to give me her number then little did she know it took me about 6 months worth of self confidence and bottle to ask her it..

ah well. check what shes missing out on *does a little sexy dance*:D :rolleyes:

irlrobins

nomorebadtown wrote:

no ****ing reply, thanks alot dude:mad:

Hey not my fault you're an ugly bastard!;)

bummer, but I'm sure most people are not too surprised if they don't hear back from someone they met over the weekend. Just the way it works...

Her loss as you say.

nomorebadtown

irlrobins wrote:

Her loss as you say.

thats what i'm telling myself

LegacyUser

Did he call yet ?

panda100

Heya-have to admit I totally agree with irlrobins on this.Guys dont generrally try and play it cool like us girls.when they firts meet us.Whenever I have given my number to a guy,they almost always send a text the next day.To be honest if he hasnt made any contact yet its not looking good.

Dont worry about it though Dawn,it's happened to every girl,that a guy you like hasnt called.Its frustrating and annoying but nothing can be done.I say do something else to take your mind off him!