Fat??

dundalk cailin

Okay this has probably been brought up a million times, but a comment made has been playing on my mind since last night.

My housemate and i were just talking, and she said oh im lucky i can eat chocolate cos im so slim, then she said oh you're having choclate, and looked me up and down. i said do u think im fat, and she said, well you are yes.

now im a size 12-14, 5 ft 6 19year old girl. in my opinion, im not thin, BUT not fat, as in overweight. do u think it was a flippant remark made on her part, because im quite sensitive bout criticism, or should i be on a diet? i do eat chocolate, i wont deny, but i eat heatlhily enough otherwise. i walk a lot, as i dont have the opportunity to exercise a lot.

ive been this size since i can remember, actually was a 14-16 when i was in teens. im feeling a bit paranoid now, esp in the house! as i wouldnt alwayss have had a lot of self confidence really, but i was doing well there!!

any opinions??

LegacyUser

Jesus, thats just being mean. there are the kinda conversations, with your bestest friends, where you can tell them that they could stand to loose a few pounds, and you can say it because its in context and between good mates, and you are not trying to be hurtful, but by the sounds of it, your house mate was just being a wagon!!

Have you got a pic you could post? Blur out your face if you don't want people to see. I am the same height and size as you, but I have never been called fat by any of my friends.

vibrant

I have an opinion, yes.

Your housemate is a total f***ing bitch, and it is not her place to pass judgement on your appearance. She said it to hurt you.

Don't go on a diet just to please her! Nothing wrong with eating chocolate, a bit of what you fancy won't do you any harm.

Oriel

Get to the crunch, what's your weight?

joejoem

It sounds like a french girl thing to say.


Actually it just sounds like a bitch thing to say. F*ck her, dont worry about it.

c - 13

Dont pay any attention, your a normal weight. I'm not going to quote BMI's or anything like that at you because they're not 100% accurate.
If you are worried about your weight see your GP/gym instructor and ask them to do a body fat test.
It seems to me that your housemate is one of these people that belive that having a chest that looks like one of these is the only way to look good - Not true.

dubgirl

well in my humble opinion this was an off the wall comment to be made by someone! she obviously wanted you to take offense for some reason. you are by no means fat at a size12/14 just a very average size as are most women. seems to me she must be a little insecure and makes herself feel better by putting other people down. If your feeling you would like a different body shape for your own reasons then take up walking deffo the best form of excercise for a woman.

Nasty_Girl

dundalk cailin wrote:

Okay this has probably been brought up a million times, but a comment made has been playing on my mind since last night.

My housemate and i were just talking, and she said oh im lucky i can eat chocolate cos im so slim, then she said oh you're having choclate, and looked me up and down. i said do u think im fat, and she said, well you are yes.

now im a size 12-14, 5 ft 6 19year old girl. in my opinion, im not thin, BUT not fat, as in overweight. do u think it was a flippant remark made on her part, because im quite sensitive bout criticism, or should i be on a diet? i do eat chocolate, i wont deny, but i eat heatlhily enough otherwise. i walk a lot, as i dont have the opportunity to exercise a lot.

ive been this size since i can remember, actually was a 14-16 when i was in teens. im feeling a bit paranoid now, esp in the house! as i wouldnt alwayss have had a lot of self confidence really, but i was doing well there!!

any opinions??

She's a bitch who is insecure about herself and wants to feel better by making someone else feel worse.
F*ck her.

dundalk cailin

ill try n get a pic up..

PS sillysausage u look great!!

yea i never like deprivin myself of food i like, i happen to adore chocolate..

im round 10.5 - 11 stone

LegacyUser

I bet you she is the one with weight issues. I just remembered, once, about 2 years ago, my friend kym, who is a tiny little thing, about 5"3 and 7.5 stone, was telling me she had a fight with her friend and things had turned nasty. They started calling names, and Kym called her mate a fat pig, I said "how big is she" and she looked at me, said, "about your size" and continued on with her story.
Honestly, I couldn't respond I was so shocked, I was actually about a stone lighter back then, so God knows what she thinks of me now. Anyways, turns out she is obsessed with her figure, and everyone elses, so its her issue, not mine.

We weigh the same, if I ever meet her,(your flat mate) and she tells me I'm fat, I will give her a fat lip.... Grrrr

dundalk cailin

yea i actually generally dont feel too critical of my body..obviously i have hangups, i do say ah to be a size 10 etc, now ive never been a ten in my life, tho in any case, i have a better figure than i did, which i think is positive..

also isnt it something to do with metabolism? im not blamin my weight on that , but it could be a factor, no?

kopijack

Keep eating the Choco get really fat and then blame your flatmate for ruining your life:)



That will send her into a spiralling depression..in which she may get fat also:o

savoyard

Nasty_Girl wrote:

She's a bitch who is insecure about herself and wants to feel better by making someone else feel worse.
F*ck her.

Exactly. There are girls who can't stand to see other people having a normal relationship with food. I had people over for dinner one night and this (very thin, about size 8) girl spent the whole time discussing the calories in the food I'd prepared. She left all the most fattening parts of the meal on her plate and didn't shut up going on and on about how she would love some more whatever but couldn't possibly eat it until all the blokes started the chorus of "oh but you're so slim, you shouldn't worry about diets". I couldn't help feel like she was looking at me like I was crazy to enjoy my food being a few stone heavier than her.

Life without chocolate is crap Don't let it get to you - she's the one with the problem, not you.

ven0m

sillysausage wrote:

Jesus, thats just being mean. there are the kinda conversations, with your bestest friends, where you can tell them that they could stand to loose a few pounds, and you can say it because its in context and between good mates, and you are not trying to be hurtful, but by the sounds of it, your house mate was just being a wagon!!

Have you got a pic you could post? Blur out your face if you don't want people to see. I am the same height and size as you, but I have never been called fat by any of my friends.

Actually you look like a brunette version of my g/f (she's blonde) & she's HOTTTT!!!!!


::: ven0mous :::

dundalk cailin

i cant imagine givin my beloved choc up!!!

well as i say to her, your ruinin ur lungs with cigarettes! ive never put a cigarette to my lips in my life!!

it just felt like she was gloating over the fact that im not as skinny, thats what got to me. the concensus (in her opinion) is obv still there that the skinnier the girl, the better looking

Nasty_Girl

dundalk cailin wrote:

ill try n get a pic up..

PS sillysausage u look great!!

yea i never like deprivin myself of food i like, i happen to adore chocolate..

im round 10.5 - 11 stone

Well I'm 5'7 and between 11.5 - 12 and where as I would love to be 10.5 again I'm not to pushed so I really really wouldn't worry about the evil bitch, she's just a stupid ignorant twisted attention seeking loser.:mad: Buy her really fattening food and switch the labels with low fat stuff ala malcom in the middle

dundalk cailin

^^ lmao!!!

aw thanks, its great to hear from some 'real' girls!!

in my experience no guy has ever told me i needed to lose weight, if anything, they say i have a lovely figure...is that not positive!!!!???

LegacyUser

ven0m wrote:

Actually you look like a brunette version of my g/f (she's blonde) & she's HOTTTT!!!!!


::: ven0mous :::

COOL:o

Zulu

dundalk cailin wrote:

i cant imagine givin my beloved choc up!!!

well as i say to her, your ruinin ur lungs with cigarettes! ive never put a cigarette to my lips in my life!!

...ah ha - so you give her sh1t about smoking? Perhaps she's sh1t sick of you giving her grief about smoking and had a go at you about eating chocolate?

ven0m

dundalk cailin wrote:

i cant imagine givin my beloved choc up!!!

well as i say to her, your ruinin ur lungs with cigarettes! ive never put a cigarette to my lips in my life!!

it just felt like she was gloating over the fact that im not as skinny, thats what got to me. the concensus (in her opinion) is obv still there that the skinnier the girl, the better looking

My g/f will NEVER give up chocolate - she loves it too much - perhaps even more than me, but I am ok with taht cos chocolaty goodness is unmatchable....

Don;t let anyone else make u feel bad about how u look - for alot of people it's steeped in jealousy, for others its cos they do it to make themselves feel better about themselves...... so I say f**k em!!!!

Took me ages to try to get my g/f to stop saying "shut up!" & getting all embaressed when i told her she was hot (everyone I introduced her to has told me I'm a jammy bugger for pulling her!!!)

Chin up, enjoy your chocolate & bugger everyone else.... be hot with your chocolate & enjoy life!!!


::: ven0mous :::

dundalk cailin

no i said that once, as a retort, jokingly to her many comments bout choc! she asks me can she smoke in the kitchen, which is right, cos im not blowin poisonous chocolate fumes in her face now am i???

ven0m

Zulu wrote:

...ah ha - so you give her sh1t about smoking? Perhaps she's sh1t sick of you giving her grief about smoking and had a go at you about eating chocolate?

Eating chocolate doesn't affect other people's health around you, smoking does ..... & yes I'm a smoker....

::: ven0mous :::

LegacyUser

Ah you sound like a fun, confident girl, maybe it pisses her off that your so happy with yourself ans she wants to take you down a peg or two.

Whatever her reasons for saying what she said, you can be sure its her own personal problem, not yours.

Don't let her get to you.

ven0m

sillysausage wrote:

Ah you sound like a fun, confident girl, maybe it pisses her off that your so happy with yourself ans she wants to take you down a peg or two.

Whatever her reasons for saying what she said, you can be sure its her own personal problem, not yours.

Don't let her get to you.

Where's that damn rep system when u need it - well said!!!


::: ven0mous :::

Zulu

dundalk cailin wrote:

no i said that once, as a retort, jokingly to her many comments bout choc! she asks me can she smoke in the kitchen, which is right, cos im not blowin poisonous chocolate fumes in her face now am i???

Hummm, I dunno. I'm getting a vibe here. How and ever - I was just asking, I gave up smoking a long time ago, but when I smoked there were one are two people that used to get so high and mighty... used to really annoy me, and I definalty said things to them that I shouldn't have.

You maintain that she said this out of the blue - if thats the case she's a thundering toe-rag and dosen't deserve the time of any of the good people on this thread (the OP especally)

dundalk cailin

thanks guys, good advice, im just gonna forget bout it, and show her how brunettes / 'real' girls have fun!!! (trying to think of something she isnt!!)

dundalk cailin

Zulu wrote:

Hummm, I dunno. I'm getting a vibe here. How and ever - I was just asking, I gave up smoking a long time ago, but when I smoked there were one are two people that used to get so high and mighty... used to really annoy me, and I definalty said things to them that I shouldn't have.

You maintain that she said this out of the blue - if thats the case she's a thundering toe-rag and dosen't deserve the time of any of the good people on this thread (the OP especally)

no i didnt say it in a high and mighty way, i know what u mean tho, maybe it wasnt a personal attack, as i said im not gonna take it to heart (well any more than i have!)

trishw78

as I said in a different post Girls/women are supposed to have curves and the fact the previous boyfriends have said your figure is lovely... is fantastic If only there were more men like that out there.

Don't worry about what she says it just shows that she's got insecurities about her body...

Sangre

Well maybe you shouldn't have asked her to give her opinion on your weight.

Its your own fault, you wanted her to lie and she didn't.

dundalk cailin

no it was the way she looked me up and down that made me defensive, i dont go fishin for compliments anyway, not that kind of girl

Sangre

You still asked for her opinion.
If you didn't want to know you wouldn't have said anything.

Miss Fluff

Sounds like a miserable cow.
Don't let her project her body hang-ups on to you.;)

Binomate

Keep putting lard in her dinner and over time watch her pile on the pounds. Take revenge.

rainbow kirby

I hate when really thin people get bitchy like that! I know myself I'm not exactly skinny... I'm 5'6 and a size 14 (pushing 14-16 at times) but I'm healthy. I wouldn't mind losing a little bit... but it's nobody's place to comment about it.

ando

Sangre wrote:

Its your own fault, you wanted her to lie and she didn't.

I know I'd respect a person more if they took me aside and told me I had a smelly breath or BO etc etc so I could deal with the situation in my own way instead of continuing on unknowingly with the problem. I would'nt be taking offence like pretty much everyone is here. But then again, I dont know the girl or her personality, she could have been acting like a right bitch or she could be trying to help

el tel

steal the bay-otch's boyfriend

simu

Hmm, it's hard to imagine how that comment could not be meant to be spiteful. It sounds like that girl has issues tbh. If she makes such a comment again, tell her straight out you think it's inappropriate.

(Everyone's as real as the next person no matter what their weight, tho)!

Aurther Hugh

dundalk cailin wrote:

thanks guys, good advice, im just gonna forget bout it, and show her how brunettes / 'real' girls have fun!!! (trying to think of something she isnt!!)

Hmmm...a tad bitter? I can't stand this whole 'real' guff. Greatest excuse or women letting themselves go. A bit of what you fancy is nice; bit of choc at the weekend but women need to have a bit more self restraint and stop saying that their 'real' when they are actually lacking in discipline!

Nasty_Girl

ando wrote:

I know I'd respect a person more if they took me aside and told me I had a smelly breath or BO etc etc so I could deal with the situation in my own way instead of continuing on unknowingly with the problem. I would'nt be taking offence like pretty much everyone is here.

Yeah but I thought the whole point is the OP is not fat (as far as I can tell from her measurements) just because someone isn't a size 8 or 10 doesn't mean they're fat.
And I can't actually believe you'd compare having bad breath to being a size 12. That is sick.

ando wrote:

she could be trying to help

help what?
Help run the OPs confidence into the ground? The girl is not overweight, so her health isn't at risk!! What she looks like is nobody's business only her own, so if you're suggesting that the roommate is only try to help her by motivating her to lose weight for her own good you're way off.

Sangre

Nasty_Girl wrote:

Y

help what?
Help run the OPs confidence into the ground? The girl is not overweight, so her health isn't at risk!! What she looks like is nobody's business only her own, so if you're suggesting that the roommate is only try to help her by motivating her to lose weight for her own good you're way off.

I hate to be the bringer of bad news but taking her weight as 11 stone (should weigh yourself just after you get up and after you 'clean out the system') and her height at 5'6' then her BMI is 24.9. Being 25+ is considered overweight, so she is *just* under taking her weight as 11 stone.
That means if she doesn't watch her weight/diet then it could easily go over that 25 mark and into the unhealthy categorey where she is statistically more at risk to medical ailments associated with being overweight.

This needs to be addressed whether someone's feelings are being hurt are not. Its not bad now but at her age it could be only the start of long-term weight gain.

AARRRGH

Size 14 for a small 19 year old does sound a little big TBH. But everyone holds their weight differently I suppose. I really think we need a picture of you to give an accurate opinion on this. If you don't want to post a pic, PM one to me and I'll give you a brutally honest opinion. Note that I dislike fat people so I won't be polite for politeness sake.

Your friend was being a bitch though.

TheIceMaker

Thats really cruel for her to say that to you Dundalk cailin. I know how it feels. I'm 5'6" and 10 stone and have been called fat before, it doesnt help. I usually find food as a big comforter, and i remember when an ex called me fat, i piled 2 stone. But as soon as you feel comfortable in your own skin, ehich by all accounts i think you do, then don't feel bad, you are a young healthy woman! dont let anyone tell you otherwise:)

Sangre

TheIceMaker wrote:

then don't feel bad, you are a young healthy woman! dont let anyone tell you otherwise:)

Oh, I didn't happen to see her medical reports in the OP. Could you give me a brief synopsis?

Nasty_Girl

Sangre wrote:

I hate to be the bringer of bad news but taking her weight as 11 stone (should weigh yourself just after you get up and after you 'clean out the system') and her height at 5'6' then her BMI is 24.9. Being 25+ is considered overweight, so she is *just* under taking her weight as 11 stone.
.

Fair enough but she's between 10.5 and 11 so still not over weight, she claims to have lost weight in recent years so she's obviously aware of how it can go.

TheIceMaker

Just out of curiousity, do you weigh less after you poo?

AARRRGH

Nasty_Girl wrote:

Fair enough but she's between 10.5 and 11

At five foot six. This may be "normal" for an Irish girl, but you'd have a hard time convincing a French/German/etc. woman that this is not over-weight. Come on.

*Lees*

Girls can be bitches!!... you don't sound fat too me!!!
Take no notice of her... what a cow!!... I wouldn't call her a friend!!! fricken biatch!! haha
.... eat as much chocolate as you like girl!! she sounds like she is jelous of you for something!

dundalk cailin

el tel wrote:

steal the bay-otch's boyfriend

he's 41, im 19

anyway i wil take the BMI thing into account,im not sayin i dont need to lose weight, i was told last year by a woman who runs a slimmin class (i wasnt attendin she just offered to weigh me), that my *ideal* weight for my height / build is 10 stone..now if im a bit over, how am i already veerin into overweight status i will check it out anyway..

as i said, it wasnt so much what she said as how she said it, it was in a superior 'im better than you' way that had me thinking, well maybe she's right? and then i was thinking who is she to tell me what i am or am not?

i am not the type of person who can diet, this may stem from the fact that my mam has strugled with her weight for years..my sister is as thin as a rake, we must look odd together!! no she takes after my dad..i got my mam's genes! my mam has told me before that i should lose some weight, but when i came back from france there, she said oh you have lost weight (she doesnt say it unless its true), i also purchased size 12 jeans for the first time ever..i was on a positive note til...last night, cos all the insecurities came back..like i know im bigger than my housemates, but i covered myself up til i went to bed then, wouldnt even take my jumper off!!

to the other girls eg sillysausage, icemaker, and rainbow, do u take comments like this to heart or am i over dramatisin??

hard to know really!! i appreciate the opinions!!

AARRRGH

Well, diets don't actually work. Only surgery can remove the fat cells. Diets just empty them for a while.

If your weight bothers you, change your lifestyle to include more activity and less junk (I love stating the obvious )

And maybe do some other things to improve your confidence and self-esteem so things like this don't bother you as much in the future! (exercising is great for confidence!!)

dundalk cailin

i walk a good bit, (auite briskly)em..i dont eat a whole load of junk, just love choc!! cant help it..no one's gonna wean me off it!!

Binomate

If somethings not broken, don't fix it.