Lets write a non spam and muppet story!

smoke.me.a.kipper

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">If a new thread gets started, I'll keep an eye on it and keep it clear.</font>

hmm. ok well here goes...

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It was night. The neon lights clistened agains Tom's '86 Dodge as he drove by the casinos and hotels of Las Vegas.

LoLth

The memories of that November night in '71 were still fresh and clear in his mind. His fists clenched as his dreams unfurled the tapestry of events in vivid colour and heart wrenching detail.


<I'm not being strict, I'm just trying to let people do something the like on the board without having it ruined by people who feel the need to spam. As I said, they can set up a mess about story if they want. I'd prolly post to that too but *****ing sessions will be shut down>

Kix

Suddenly a terrifyingly loud crash wrenched him visicously from his sleep. His eyes stared round the room in terror, uncomprehending until he spotted the bright shards littering the cheap carpet.

Doc

Grabbing the gun from the locker he crept over to the broken window. The wind gently blew the curtains as he peered out into the dark night…

smoke.me.a.kipper

he almost tripped over it. a single brick lay in the broken glass. there was an envelope taped to the brick. he opened it and read...

Evil Phil

"We Know", he gulped ...

nesf

The rest of the letter was blurred by rainwater, the hazy black seeped further into the page, could they actually know?

(I wasn't critising LoLth, I was only compensating for the deletion. I totally agree with its need, I was trying to write around the post. From Bard, who'd have thunk it?)

smoke.me.a.kipper

if they "knew" he reliased he must leave for his own safety. he left the hotel and got a cab to the airpost making sure he wasn't followed...

nesf

Tom walked down the street, in a world free of killer robots and time warps....

Kolodny

He checked into a cheap and trashy roadside hotel downtown under the assumed name, P.J. Herbert....

Evil Phil

... where he would wait. He knew the time was near ...

Kix

Sitting in that cab, he had time to reflect on the dream which had haunted him again tonight, as on so many other nights. Helen - would he ever be free of her memory? He burried his head in his hands.

Kolodny

Just as Tom went to open the window, his cell phone rang. He slowly picked it up and pressed the answer button....

Kix

...and though he didn't like what he heard, he knew that it could have been nothing else.

Slipping the .45 from it's concealed holster, he contemplated it's dull weight for a moment. Reassuring himself by first checking it's magazine, he placed it in the bedside locker beside the Giddeon's bible.

He needed some sleep.

[This message has been edited by Kix (edited 31-05-2001).]

nesf

Tom, ignoring the voices in his head, tried to sleep, but he couldn't stop twisting within the bed as he wrestled with the agony of the past..

(Apologies if this seems off topic but it seems like LoLth is being very strict)

[This message has been edited by nesf (edited 31-05-2001).]

Doc

Tom paid the taxi and quickly entered the departures area. He made his way through departures to the storage lockers. He reached up to remove the key he had worn around his neck for the last two years. Suddenly a hand griped him powerfully on the shoulder…

Bard

The owner of the hand was a burly square-faced man. "Get down! Now!" he shouted. They hit the deck just before the first explosion came, ripping through an escalator and shattering windows nearby.


(actually, I deleted the post myself, nesf... due to the timing of my posting, it didn't 'fit')

Puck

People ran screaming towards the exits then suddenly there was another explosion sending bodies through the air.

The burly man grabbed him and ran into the toilets where he lifted up one of the ceiling tiles and reached inside...

Lord Khan

... he pulled out a briefcase. Tom noticed the initals E.M on the side. he decided he hadn't time to wonder they're meaning as another explosion was heard which sent the door of the toilets flying in hitting the unknown man.

The man lay on the floor bleeding. He motioned for Tom to come closer...
he struggled for his words ..." ...take ... the ... case ...". the last words Tom heard where "They ... know ... about ..." and the man fell silent. Tom checked the man's wrist ...

nesf

Their eyes met across the choas, as they settled in a private calm, suprise flickered across the mans face and fled, a police officer ran up....

(apologies Bard, just thought it was a too slapstick cliched comic type post thingy, in realtion to the surrounding posts, to be serious.)

Evil Phil

... and down screaming. "Get a hold of yourself man" Tom shouted, "For Gods sake these people need you". The cop calmed down, nodded at Tom and radioed back to base. The last thing Tom heard as he ran off into the chaos was the cops radio "Look out for a large guy with a briefcase skkks chckk ...."

Hendrix_Nighn

Helen sat sipping umbrella ****tails from a straw clad roof beach house many thousands of miles away from any fear and terror. Little did she know of what had become of her flash in the pan remark about her husband's secret double life to a man she had a quick one night fling in the back of an '86 dodge with. She may be the blonde bimbette wife of the infamous Edrill Mossgrove but that doesn't stop her from knowing what's going on!

"I wonder what ever happened to that guy, Tom, Herbert, what was his name anyway?" She thought tropically to herself.

Bard

It was still there, but his pulse wasn't. Realising that there was only one thing to do, he promptly went ahead and did it...

Lord Khan

... he stood up and looked around quickly before he ripped open his shirt to reveal..

Doc

…the gun he had hidden before entering the airport . Tom picked up the case and ran out of the toilets. Outside was chaos. Explosions continued to rock the building and people ran screaming in every direction. Through the mass of flames and rubble that once was the departure lounge Tom noticed a man standing some distance away alone and seemingly unfazed by the surrounding madness. Tom watched as the man slowly turned towards him …

Kix

Little did she know that Tom was going to come crashing back into her life.

Doc

For two years Tom had lived in fear of being found. Constantly on the move and having to remember countless assumed names he had lost contact with all his old friends but his past had found him and he knew only one man he could trust to help…

Bard

... The man known only as... Tim.

Hendrix_Nighn

Tim sat at a high stool craps table sipping a fleshy pink coloured drink in a martini glass. The casino was quiet but never lost the humdrum speckles of sounds that gave life to any midnight; cards folding their shuffles, dice clacking dice and the endless multi coloured chips shuffled and counted and shuffled and counted and shuffled.

"We've got his car" He whimpered to the man at his side.

"About time you did something right, now how are you going to finish this, Tim?" Said the shadowy figure.

"I don't know Edrill, I just don't know..."

Da_cOmRaDe_MiKe

he finished his drink and ordered another. he pulled a large brown envelope from his jacket pocket and handed it to the man beside him and said "make it count" and then he stood up gulped down his drink and walked over to the phone box in the corner. he inserted mney and dialed 555-9435. a gentle womans voice answered and said...

---

- Da_cOmRaDe_MiKe

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2"> Man causes all problems. No man, no problems. - Stalin </font>

Evil Phil

"Hello, Hellen Mossgrove speaking ...."

Bard

"The banana is protruding from the nasal cavity of the hairy gringo", said Tim. As he sipped his drink, waiting smugly for the highly mysterious coded reply to his highly mysterious coded message, the second to next telephone box to him unexpectedly exploded.

Someone had obviously missed their target.

"Hurry the hell up, Mossgrove!", he thought to himself.

---

Bard

---

"Henry! The cat wants to go out!" ... "Why, Min? Is he on fire?"

[This message has been edited by Bard (edited 05-06-2001).]

BNC

suddenly the lights go out, a helicopter can be heard circling overhead....

Bard

"awww crap", said Tom, ... 700 miles away, and not even thinking of Tim. Little did Tom know that Tim was his half-brother, - but that's another story.

Now, about this helicopter...

BNC

.....Tim thought to himself, as the Night sun illuminated the room. "How am i going to get out now?".......

Bard

Suddenly (because these things rarely happen slowly and predictably), the glass ceiling of the casino was shattered and 4 members of a crack marine squad descended through the resulting hole on ropes from the helicopter making it to the floor in no time at all. "Nice entrance" said Tim, forgetting momentarily about Helen on the other end of the telephone line.

"Thanks," said Corporal "Mad" Dan McCarthy, "- you're coming with us, oh Tim", - and in one swift move, he placed a tape around Tim's mouth and tied a harness around his torso. With a tug from him on the rope, the winchman in the chopper began to haul them away.

BNC

"let go of the phone", shouted "Mad" dan McCarthy,"You'll get us all killed". As the phone kiosk swung like a pendulum from beneath them....

Bard

"Mmmffmfmfff... mmff!! Mff? mmffeemfmm!" said Tim, forgetting that his mouth was taped over.

He let go of the phone and it, with the kiosk crashed down, predictably exploding on impact with the ground. "Jayziz", said Dan, as they were airlifted through the roof and winched towards the helicopter. Once all were aboard, the helicopter began to speed westward.

[anyone else like to carry on besides just me and BNC?... it's getting exciting ]

---

Bard

---

"Henry! The cat wants to go out!" ... "Oh dear, Min! Is he on fire, again?"

Hendrix_Nighn

*Chokachockachochokazzzzwwhhhoooozzzz* Tom had to duck as a helicopter whizzled over his Lego man hairdo.

"Hmmmm," he thought "I feel a familiar presence." "Now to open this case" he quickened.

Tom fumbled inside his shirt like a prepubescant blind boy looking for a pillow. The key fitted chastily into the silver Samsonite lock beside the initials E.M. *click* *click* - went the latches.

Tom had to use his elbow grease to open the by now rusted case, he couldn't believe the contents.
Disbelief ... "a .. solid gold... banana?"
"... and... and...

BNC

...two AA pencil batteries. Tom fixed his hair with a puzzled expression on his face. Why had the golden banana been sent to him, what were the AA batteries for and where would he get some good hair advice? There was only one person who could answer these question.....

Thrasher

.... Jon Bon Jovi, his evil twin who had foreseen this chain of events and knew of
Tom's passion for crooked fruit. Holding a battery in each hand, Tom concentrated on the
task at hand and.......

Kolodny

...stole away down a quiet back street. Tom carefully inserted the batteries into one end of the heavy gold banana, checking over his shoulder for signs of anyone watching. With the batteries in place he crept back out onto the street, seemingly unnoticed, slipping the banana into his jacket pocket....

WhiteWashMan

had died in a freak trout fishing accident months ago.
however, if he could get to colorado, he knew he could try to meet up with a man known only by his codename....
'Condorman'
stupid name, he thought to himself, as he busied himself for the oncoming...

Bard

... improvement in the quality of this story.

Kolodny

Just as Tom was about to set off, he suddenly remembered the suitcase. He dashed back to the place he had opened it found nothing where the case had been. A shiver went up his spine. "Someone knows I'm here." he thought to himself, "Someone has taken Mossgrove's case".

Tom looked up and down the dirty street frantically, trying to locate the nearest safe exit. Before he could move his feet he felt a heavy hand on his shoulder and heard a somehow familiar voice say....

BNC

...chiquita.....

Da_cOmRaDe_MiKe

no..

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- Da_cOmRaDe_MiKe

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2"> Man causes all problems. No man, no problems. - Stalin </font>

smoke.me.a.kipper

...tom turned around and saw the ex KGB agent Valentina Omerovsky standing there. he was tired, but he know he needed answers. he knew she would help him unravel the mysterys of the previous days. they shared a taxi to a trashy motel. here she would reveal everything...

BNC

..Helen watched from the shadows as Tom and Valentina entered the hotel. She had gotten the activation code word from Tim two days ago, but before she could reply there had been an explosion on the other end of the phone line.
She stepped from the shadows...

LoLth

Helen hoped that Valentina didn't know about the hiding place for the chip. Most security being male, they were unlikely to examine the "banana" too closely, let alone the batteries... but it was a common trick among female agents, maybe more common than she thought. She had to get Valentina away from Tom. How to do it without Tom discovering her interference was another question....


quick note: I've "rewound" the thread, to avoid the obvious porn path being followed.
Don't take offense if yours was deleted. Kipper, take offense, and either behave or post somewhere else.

smoke.me.a.kipper

she entered the hotel. a greasy haired bellboy was behind the desk. the person in charge had obviously stepped out for a while.

she approached the inexperianced young lad and said...