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Too skinny

  • 23-08-2003 9:12pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,613 ✭✭✭


    This is a rant about being too skinny. This is a personal issue for me, so I think it belongs in this board.

    I've always been a skinny bastard. All through school, I hated my appearance. Being skinny meant that I wasn't strong enough to defend myself against bullies, also I was sh1te at team sports that require strength e.g. gaelic and rugby. I was forced to play these sports in PE classes, and was a laughing stock because I was such a weakling.

    Now in my mid twenties, I'm still thin. I'm not as bad now as I used to be. At 5 foot 9, I weigh 10.5 stone (was 8 stone in my mid teens) I'm in reasonable shape, with low body fat. I have a "normal" BMI, still, I'm not at all happy with my appearance. Most guys I see are more muscular than me.

    In my experience, being skinny is a big turn-off for women who definitely prefer guys with big muscles. OK, many women claim that HUGE muscles are a turn-off - this may be true but certainly they seem to like guys who are well built. I reckon that at my height, my ideal weight would be around 12 stone

    Even slightly overweight, flabby, out of shape guys with pot bellies have more success with women than skinny guys in my experience.

    My height is also on the small side and my face is nothing special, so it's essential that I have a decent body to make up for these to improve my chances with the ladies. I can't change my height and face, so I'll have to concentrate on my body.

    Now I've really been making an effort to get bigger. For about 6 months, I've been doing weights, eating like a horse, taking protein supplements. Yet I've made no significant gains, no more than 2 pounds. Must have an extremely fast metabolism.

    Anyone know if there's anything else I can do that may help me gain weight?

    Oh yeah, finding clothes to fit is a nightmare. Very often even the smallest size is too loose on me. What are people's opinions on style of clothes - what looks better on skinny guys - tight fitting or loose fitting clothes?

    One thing that pisses me off is that it's acceptable in society to slag off skinny guys. People are always telling me I'm like a "stick" or a "whip". In contrast, it's a big no-no to slag fat people, especially fat women. Slag a fat woman and you risk being lynched and accused of driving women to anorexia. Yet no-one ever talks about guys who have a so-called "Adonis complex" - guys who get obsessed with building muscle and are never satisfied no matter how big they get. I believe a lot of guys suffer from this nowadays - witness how busy gyms are with guys pumping iron.

    That's pretty much it. Comments/suggestions/criticisms are welcome.

    BrianD3


Comments

  • Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 23,363 Mod ✭✭✭✭feylya


    Originally posted by BrianD3
    My height is also on the small side and my face is nothing special, so it's essential that I have a decent body to make up for these to improve my chances with the ladies.

    Essential? Sorry mate but if some bird is going to pass you off because you're on the skinny side, she's not worth your time.

    My advice would be forget about changing your appearance. My father was skinny all his life but now at about 55 he got a beer belly. Some people can't put on weight until later in life. There's nothing simple that can be done. Just stay fit, eat well and properly and get on with life.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,446 ✭✭✭bugler


    I don't know if it's as big a turn off for women as you say it is. Sounds like you're making a mountain out of a mole hill. I have friends who are probably about your height/weight and I wouldn't really class them as skinny. However, if it really is a problem for you, then pop over to the Fitness board, I think there's a couple of threads there about it, and logic1 and a couple of the others can talk your ears off on the matter no doubt.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,478 ✭✭✭tribble


    Now I've really been making an effort to get bigger. For about 6 months, I've been doing weights, eating like a horse, taking protein supplements. Yet I've made no significant gains, no more than 2 pounds.

    Holy Jesus!, what i'd give to be like that!, I had a free house for a couple (2) weeks and put on 8 pounds - of which 6 still remain a month later!
    I spent a month in central China treking around with a 50 pound haversack - I ate 6 meals in 30 days because of being sick/a vegetarian/ nasty squirts - besides 1L of Sprite per day I ate no solids between Beijing and Hong Kong (2 weeks).
    I only lost 10 pounds! I almost died!, cool trip though:)

    Count yourself lucky, mate:)
    tribble

    /edited for typo


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,730 ✭✭✭✭simu


    My height is also on the small side and my face is nothing special, so it's essential that I have a decent body to make up for these to improve my chances with the ladies.

    Most women don't want an Adonis - they want someone who is sound/funny/interesting to talk to, preferably all three. From your post. I take it you don't look freakishly ugly so if you make an effort to get to know women eventually, you'll find one whom you like and who feels the same about you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,613 ✭✭✭BrianD3


    Holy Jesus!, what i'd give to be like that!, I had a free house for a couple (2) weeks and put on 8 pounds - of which 6 still remain a month later!

    Yeah I'm the total opposite. A while ago I took a week off work which I spent lazing about at home. I did no weights that week, figuring a rest from them would do me good. Because I was sedentary for that week, I didn't feel the need to eat like a horse. At the end of the week, I had lost 3 pounds and felt noticably skinnier.

    And a few years ago (before I had started doing any training) I went to Spain for two weeks. Didn't eat all that well because the food wasn't great and I'm a fussy eater, still I certainly didn't starve myself. By the time I got home I had lost 9 pounds!

    BrianD3


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,141 ✭✭✭fisty


    if you wanna put on weight get a deskjob and a car, and drink loads of coke and eat loads of peanut lion bars, you'll be a fat **** in no time.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,068 ✭✭✭Magic Monkey


    This is better off in the Fitness forum, for the likes of Jak/logic1 to answer, but all I can say is in most cases where someone skinny with a fast metabolism is trying to gain weight, they're not eating nearly enough as they should. The converse holds true as well. And also where people say they've lost x amount of pounds in a few days, it's usually just water.

    Here are some links:

    http://www.trygve.com/mfw_faq.html#whattoeat
    http://www.wannabebig.com/article.php?articleid=93


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 677 ✭✭✭The_Scary_Man


    If you truly want to put on muscle you need to look at what you are eating and how often.

    Also you say you are doing weights for the last six months but different weight programmes are designed to give different results e.g. Doing low reps of high weights builds strength and size where high reps of lower weights build endurance and tone what you have.

    There is a good thread here that discusses this exact problem.

    I had the same problem, I am 5'11'' and was 10.5 stone in January of this year and was in the same mindset as you. I was convinced that women didn't find me attractive because I was too skinny so I decided to start doing weights and making a real effort to put on muscle. I started training with a friend of mine who had been weight training for a couple of years and stuck to the programme he set out for me. Also I changed the way I ate increasing the amount of times a day I ate and eating more protein (including protein supplements).
    I am now 12 stone and I am delighted with how I look even though I am aiming for the 13 stone mark by February next year.
    As I started to put on weight my confidence increased and I started to flirt more with girls in work and found out through more flirtatious conversations that some of them had fancied me all along.
    So while I would agree with some of the people on here about you needing to re-evaluate your self image and why you feel you are not being successful with the ladies at present, doing weights will certainly not do your chances any harm, will increase your fitness as a nice fringe benefit and will increase your confidence.
    Another thing that I found since I started is that sticking to a strict regime of diet and training has vastly increased my own level of self discipline so even if I started for the wrong reasons the benefits have come through eventually.
    As for the weight loss I am very similar, a few weeks ago I was out of the gym for six weeks with a back problem and lost 10 pounds because I was not eating as much as I used to but I think you will find that type of fast metabolism of benefit with weight training as you should be able to maintain a more toned physique more easily.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 741 ✭✭✭michaelanthony


    Maybe you're not just meant to breed á la 'Survival of the fittest'


  • Moderators, Motoring & Transport Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 12,616 Mod ✭✭✭✭Zascar


    Brian, Your 5 foot 9, and 10.5 stone. I'm 5 foot 6, and 8.5 stone, so don't feel too bad... I'm exactly the same, always been very small and very skinny. I also look very young - I turned 23 on tuesday and this weekend I got asked for ID 4 times! I know exactly what your talking about...

    Last year i did the same as you, joined a gym etc, and I gained just under a stone, but it made a big difference - I was considerably more muscley than I am now. It definitely made me feel better, mre confident about myself, but as other people have said, women aren't nearly as much into physical/looks than other things.

    Clothes, well, I only shop in about 4 shops, but I do dress very well, you've just got to look harder. The way I dress, what i do with my hair, my personality, I'm like this mostly because i am small! Although i'd give anything to be taller, I'd be a different person if I was. I used to get a lot of hassle, but people rarely mention my height or weight anyomre cause I've kinda accepted it! I kinda have to cause I'm too dam lazy to keep my weight up. These is no magic answer to this problem. just try not to let it affect you, or play on the upsides. I, like ScaryMan, did gain confidence by gaining weight - so give it a go, but it will take more than that...

    i find the slagging thing a bit weird, because believe me i've had my fill in my day, but it never really got to me cause it was all just a bit of fun. Now most of my mates are not doing as much sport etc and theyare getting bellies and they wish they were as skinny as me! When we go out with the girls the fat guys get slagged and I show off my six pack! Ss don't worry too much mate, the skinny/young looking guys reap the benefits in later years...


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,522 ✭✭✭✭Gordon


    Originally posted by Magic Monkey
    This is better off in the Fitness forum, for the likes of Jak/logic1 to answer
    I agree


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,312 ✭✭✭mr_angry


    If it's any consolation, I'm 5"8', and I'm 8 Stone 3 Pounds, and 21. I'm quite happy, 'cos there was a time in my mid teens where my weight dropped to 5 and a half stone. True, I was in a poor mental state at the time, but I came out of it fine, and I feel absolutely fine about being skinny - in fact I like it a lot.

    Both my Dad, and my brother were seriously overweight at one stage, and I saw the reprecussions it had for their health - severe back problems, sore joints, etc. Belive me, enjoy being skinny for as long as it lasts, and the worrying you're doing about it is far worse than your next pair of trousers being a bit loose!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,478 ✭✭✭tribble


    Dudes you're making us "normal" guys feel jealous!

    'cept for mr_angry4 dropping to 5st I think alot of guys (well, boards guys at any rate) could do with losing a few pounds, myself especially.

    I wouldn't get cut up over it. Girls admire confidence (not the same as sleaze!) - I've enough sisters to know this for certain.

    Wouldn't worry about it guys.

    tribble


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,468 ✭✭✭Lex_Diamonds


    Skinny?! 5' 9" 10.5 stone??

    DONT MAKE ME LAUGH!!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,263 ✭✭✭Caesar_Bojangle


    One thing that pisses me off is that it's acceptable in society to slag off skinny guys

    I'm 6ft6 and feel your hurt, brother.

    Take for instance last Sunday, walking down a thronged Grafton street. Nearly every third person I walked by, made a comment about my sexual superhuman height. I get asked “how’s the weather up there?” at least once a day by some random fukwit. If I’m feel jubilant I usually reply "you'll find out when you grow up son" regardless of age or gender, or if I’m feeling mighty tempestuous a simple "**** off you dumb kunt" will do.

    I don’t go about my day annoying midgets or even fat ugly people, so please leave the tall man alone.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,859 ✭✭✭logic1


    Originally posted by Caesar_Bojangle
    I'm 6ft6 and feel your hurt, brother.

    Take for instance last Sunday, walking down a thronged Grafton street. Nearly every third person I walked by, made a comment about my sexual superhuman height. I get asked “how’s the weather up there?” at least once a day by some random fukwit. If I’m feel jubilant I usually reply "you'll find out when you grow up son" regardless of age or gender, or if I’m feeling mighty tempestuous a simple "**** off you dumb kunt" will do.

    I don’t go about my day annoying midgets or even fat ugly people, so please leave the tall man alone.

    Hahahaha class.

    .logic.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,479 ✭✭✭Kell


    5' 9" 10.5st and you think your skinny. I am about 5' 11" and weigh 10st. There is nothing I can do to gain weight. Have high metabolism and eat more than most people I know and its the right sort of foods. These darn protein supplements had better work. Methinks me needs to stop smoking too.

    Anyways- quit worrying about what women think about you. Its just not worth the hassle. Get fit, look well and that should be enough for you.

    K-


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,414 ✭✭✭✭Trojan


    The flipside is I've been training relatively lots for the past 2 years trying to lose bodyfat. Sure, I've toned up a bit, but I cannot get rid of the fscking beer belly, and it's quite infuriating to read about people who can lose weight so easily.

    Anyways, next time someone gives you grief, just ask the fat bastard what their problem is (and then run away, quickly).

    Al.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 88 ✭✭MoosemaN


    Hmm tall people in Ireland?...
    I'm 6ft5.5 and 16 stones..

    Confidence will get you a long way..
    The rest would be to eat 6-8 meals a day.
    Count your calories, eat a lot of protein.

    What you can do as well is to go to the doctor and see if there is something wrong with you or that you just have a high metabolism..


    MisterAnarchy -
    I wouldn't trust what I read in Mens Health, especially in regards to weight lifting.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,479 ✭✭✭Kell


    Originally posted by Trojan
    Anyways, next time someone gives you grief, just ask the fat bastard what their problem is (and then run away, quickly).

    Al.

    While running, me shouts over shoulder "whats your problem Al".
    :D:D :eek: :D :eek: :D :eek: :D:D:D


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  • Moderators, Motoring & Transport Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 12,616 Mod ✭✭✭✭Zascar


    Originally posted by BrianD3
    A while ago I took a week off work which I spent lazing about at home. I did no weights that week, figuring a rest from them would do me good. Because I was sedentary for that week, I didn't feel the need to eat like a horse. At the end of the week, I had lost 3 pounds and felt noticably skinnier.

    i'm just enjoying the last few days of 2 weeks off work, and I definitely think I have lost weight. I don't have a scales here but I can see it in the mirror, I haven't been this skinny since I made the decision to gain weight about 3 years ago!

    As fisty said, I actually have a desk job and a car. I do Zero exercise, and eat maybe slightly less than the average person, and still I'm fading away! High metabolism, Over Active Thiroid, anyone know any of the proper medical aspects of it?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,414 ✭✭✭✭Trojan


    Originally posted by Kell
    While running, me shouts over shoulder "whats your problem Al".

    I know where you live.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,479 ✭✭✭Kell


    Me awaits sound thrashing on Saturday. :(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 317 ✭✭SHAMAN


    I tend to lose and gain weight pretty easily.
    I really mean it, some days my clothes are noticeably really tighter and others losser.
    I went away for two weeks and kinda ate what i wanted. Lost 14 pounds. Came back home, and after another 4 weeks i gained 42 pounds! I lost some and settled at 150.
    I've always wanted to be really fat, though, I don't know why.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 317 ✭✭SHAMAN


    Are there any drugs for gaining weight?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 482 ✭✭spooiirt!!


    im 6 ft4 and 14 stone. i consider myself skinny, and always will. i used to be really, i mean really skinny ( back when i was 14). im always gonna be a scrawn on the inside, no matter how big i get.
    im big now but im also an ugly b@stard, so im tryin to make up for it by workin out. looks are very important to women. i think its a stereotype that women want guys with a good sense of humour and that looks arent important. i doubt a girl at a party would look at some ugly fecker and think, " wow he must have a great personality"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,613 ✭✭✭BrianD3


    im 6 ft4 and 14 stone. i consider myself skinny,
    At least you're tall though. Height is actually more important than build - because at least you can do something about your build whereas you're stuck with your height. And women often consider guys under 6ft as "short" and would refuse to date them. Also, you're dead right about looks being very important to women.

    BrianD3


  • Moderators, Motoring & Transport Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 12,616 Mod ✭✭✭✭Zascar


    Looks aren't nearly as important to women as they are to men. Women can 'grow' to find a man attractive if they like his personality. Being tall is a major bonus. If you ever liten to a group of girls chatting and one is decsribing a guys she likes, tll is almost always the fist thing they use to describe a guy - that is if he is tall. I'm 5'5, and just over 8 stone, so I'm pretty small, however I'd rather that than absolutely huge...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 482 ✭✭spooiirt!!


    yeah, i suppose it must a bit suckey to be short. still, if youre short, just basically go for short girls. could work. and dont go out on the pull with tall mates!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 677 ✭✭✭The_Scary_Man


    Originally posted by SHAMAN
    Are there any drugs for gaining weight?

    Beer and Hash...mmmmmunchies.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 975 ✭✭✭j0e9o


    im a skinny ****e and love it i eat all the ****e off the day and do no work and all my friends eat less than me but are all fat and they call me 8 year girl build but there fat bastards


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,584 ✭✭✭✭tunney


    Let me guess thomasmckinless you're <20 years old, probably less than <18? :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,483 ✭✭✭✭daveirl


    This post has been deleted.


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