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Ex not signing form

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  • 23-05-2013 2:27pm
    #1
    spuddastud
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭


    Hello folks. Can you tell me what happens if the ex husband refuse to sign the from which states that the new child is not his.
    Thanks


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    #2
    Orion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,807 ✭✭✭✭Orion


    The other thread was a few years old - I've moved this to its own thread.

    What form would this be?


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    #3
    January
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,865 ✭✭✭✭January


    When you're still married but have a child for someone else your husband has to sign a waiver stating he is not the father of the child as it is presumed that the person you are married to is the father when you are registering the child it is automatically put on the birth cert unless you have this waiver.


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    #4
    spuddastud
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭spuddastud


    Yes, that's the form January. Thanks.
    The ex-husband is now refusing to sign the form. I am wondering if anyone knows what alternatives there are now?
    Thanks.


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    #5
    January
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,865 ✭✭✭✭January


    I take it you're not divorced then? Maybe go to court and contest paternity?


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    #6
    username123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,484 ✭✭✭username123


    Send him a solicitors letter requesting child support - he'll sign the form quick enough then.


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    #7
    spuddastud
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭spuddastud


    username123 wrote: »
    Send him a solicitors letter requesting child support - he'll sign the form quick enough then.

    Thanks 123.


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    #8
    The Corinthian
    Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    username123 wrote: »
    Send him a solicitors letter requesting child support - he'll sign the form quick enough then.
    I'd be very careful about doing that - he may choose to pay it rather than sign any document.

    From what I can make out, the OP got pregnant by another man while married, so it's likely that we're talking marital infidelity here. For all we know this could have been recent or could have happened years ago and the guy's been raising the child as his own. Either way, her (ex, presuming he legally is yet) husband is out for revenge and/or seeking to remain father to a child that he's been a father to until now (in the second scenario).

    Threatening child support can likely backfire in the first scenario (especially if his desire for revenge overshadows any reason) and almost certainly will in the second.

    I think the only sure way for the OP to sort this thing out is to contest paternity legally and seek that a court ordered DNA test resolve the matter once and for all.


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    #9
    Ms. Pingui
    Registered Users Posts: 581 ✭✭✭Ms. Pingui


    The Corinthian wrote: »
    I'd be very careful about doing that - he may choose to pay it rather than sign any document.

    From what I can make out, the OP got pregnant by another man while married, so it's likely that we're talking marital infidelity here. For all we know this could have been recent or could have happened years ago and the guy's been raising the child as his own. Either way, her (ex, presuming he legally is yet) husband is out for revenge and/or seeking to remain father to a child that he's been a father to until now (in the second scenario).

    Threatening child support can likely backfire in the first scenario (especially if his desire for revenge overshadows any reason) and almost certainly will in the second.

    I think the only sure way for the OP to sort this thing out is to contest paternity legally and seek that a court ordered DNA test resolve the matter once and for all.

    Since the OP used the terms "Ex Husband" and "New Child", it doesn't seem like a case of marital infidelity. I think you're reading too much into it.


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    #10
    The Corinthian
    Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    Ms. Pingui wrote: »
    Since the OP used the terms "Ex Husband" and "New Child", it doesn't seem like a case of marital infidelity. I think you're reading too much into it.
    Perhaps I am, fair enough; but technically/legally it would be, otherwise she'd not need him to sign the form - pedantic point, I know.

    Nonetheless, if he's refusing, I'd be very weary of sending a formal request seeking child maintenance; if he's really out for revenge, no matter what, he could say yes and I can't imagine that'll cause a court to look favourably on her down the road, especially if it is proven that the child is not his.

    I'd send him a letter threatening legal action (the above challenge to paternity) if he doesn't.


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    #11
    coffee_cake
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Politics Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 81,309 CMod ✭✭✭✭coffee_cake


    The Corinthian wrote: »
    I'd be very careful about doing that - he may choose to pay it rather than sign any document.

    From what I can make out, the OP got pregnant by another man while married, so it's likely that we're talking marital infidelity here. .

    Considering it takes 4-5 years of separation to get a divorce, no, it isn't


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    #12
    The Corinthian
    Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    bluewolf wrote: »
    Considering it takes 4-5 years of separation to get a divorce, no, it isn't
    First of all, all we know is that it's a new child, we don't know when they separated, so presuming it is not as a result of an infidelity is also jumping to conclusions, just as my presuming it was the result of an infidelity was also jumping to conclusions.

    Secondly, legally if still legally married it is legally an infidelity. This doesn't matter in countries like Ireland that have 'no fault' divorce, but it can be an issue in some places where infidelity is grounds for divorce and can even be a felony - I've an American friend who fell foul of this when he started a new relationship before his divorce came through and he got crucified over it.

    Pedantic point, and admittedly not really relevant to the OP, but I did fully admit I was being pedantic.

    My principle point was on the idea of sending out a solicitor's letter demanding child maintenance. Sounds like a good idea on the surface, but I could see it backfiring on the OP very easily. Better she contest paternity formally.

    Is there an objection to that, my actual advice, or does that too offend anyone?


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