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Dont know what to do... help!!!

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    #32
    Guest6969
    Registered Users Posts: 2 ✭Guest6969


    Really starting to feel like the fool here... My husband said he'd cut all ties with her after her 'mental' outburst of accusing him of an affair and told her to f*ck off and now he said she has apologised and said she is sorry for her crazy outburst and now they are back messaging each other again like nothing happened!


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    #33
    strandroad
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,676 ✭✭✭strandroad


    Guest6969 wrote: »
    Really starting to feel like the fool here... My husband said he'd cut all ties with her after her 'mental' outburst of accusing him of an affair and told her to f*ck off and now he said she has apologised and said she is sorry for her crazy outburst and now they are back messaging each other again like nothing happened!

    He probably told her that *you're* bipolar and she needs to back off so that he can sort you out and they can be together...

    Expect another round of the same drama in a few weeks.


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    #34
    Idle Passerby
    Registered Users Posts: 1,121 ✭✭✭Idle Passerby


    Even if he's telling the truth (which seems unlikely) he's ignoring your concerns and playing down whatever relationship he has with this woman.

    Think about it OP, why would anyone want to stay friends with a colleague who made wild unfounded accusations about their marriage? Why would anyone keep texting that person like it was no big deal? Why would they lie to their wife about having cut contact with someone they claim is "crazy"?

    An innoscent man would be standing firmly on his wifes side at this stage and leaving no shadow of doubt that he did nothing to provoke this womans behaviour. He's making a very ham fisted job of sorting this out if he has nothing to feel guilty about.


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    #35
    PinkLemonade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 768 ✭✭✭PinkLemonade


    Idle Passerby wrote: »
    Even if he's telling the truth (which seems unlikely) he's ignoring your concerns and playing down whatever relationship he has with this woman.

    Think about it OP, why would anyone want to stay friends with a colleague who made wild unfounded accusations about their marriage? Why would anyone keep texting that person like it was no big deal? Why would they lie to their wife about having cut contact with someone they claim is "crazy"?

    An innoscent man would be standing firmly on his wifes side at this stage and leaving no shadow of doubt that he did nothing to provoke this womans behaviour. He's making a very ham fisted job of sorting this out if he has nothing to feel guilty about.

    This OP, you deserve to be treated so much better than this man is treating you.

    Do you have someone you can talk to OP? Anyone who can support you?


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    #36
    tara73
    Registered Users Posts: 2,341 ✭✭✭tara73


    Guest6969 wrote: »
    Really starting to feel like the fool here... My husband said he'd cut all ties with her after her 'mental' outburst of accusing him of an affair and told her to f*ck off and now he said she has apologised and said she is sorry for her crazy outburst and now they are back messaging each other again like nothing happened!

    OP, I really think you should take matters in your own hands now, somebody else suggested to ask him to move out for a few weeks to give you head space and I think it's a very good and reasonable idea regarding the horrible situation he put you in.
    Don't let this man walk all over you.
    To be completely honest, I think this marriage is more than over but you are still in denial about it.


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    #37
    Emme
    Registered Users Posts: 4,055 ✭✭✭Emme


    Guest6969 wrote: »
    She told me he had a 'Girlfriend' valentines card hidden in the boot. I found it but he hadn't written anything on it and was still in wrapping.
    She's told me his best friend saw him buy it and has known of the affair.
    She has also told me of times they have been together but most of these I have known about as he told me he was with her as they are friends.

    If anyone is sneaky and devious it's your husband. He's telling you they're friends and when they're meeting so you won't suspect anything. He's telling you she has a crush on him and is bipolar.

    BUT

    He has indicated he's not happy and wants to separate
    He has left off his wedding ring
    He bought a Valentine's card and I assume he didn't send it to you

    It's time to wake up. if your husband won't go to marriage counselling with you to save the marriage your marriage is over.

    I agree with the suggestion that you leave off your ring as well. I strongly recommend that you get good legal advice if you have any property together.


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