Positive Encounters with Fellow Commuters

Vel · 01-05-2018 8:43am #1

Thought it might be nice to start a thread with a positive vibe so as not to scare off any potential future bike commuters who might be reading all the threads about near misses and aggro with motorists etc.!

This morning:

I have to cycle out of my estate and through a number of estates before I get onto the main road. They are narrow roads, a lot of houses don't have driveways and so there are often a lot of cars parked on the road. Its hit and miss as to whether people will wait behind you patiently, wait behind you but right up your ar*e or squeeze by. This morning a driver waited patiently behind me for ages, and when there was space to overtake she did so with loads of space. I gave her a wave, she gave me a wave, we smiled at each other and went on our way!

Further on I was heading straight and a driver was waiting to turn out of a side road but the front of her car was in the bike lane. I stuck my arm out to move out, driver behind slowed to let me do so and as I passed the car sticking out and looked in (grumbling a bit under my breath I will admit!) she gave me a genuine wave of apology and a 'sorry'. I smiled and mouthed 'ok' and we went on our way!

And finally, a lovely chap on a bike, a good ten years younger passed me out and said 'you're hot' as he went! As a nearly 40, single mum to three kids, I'll take what I can get

:D

Looking forward to hearing about other people's positive encounters

eeeee · 01-05-2018 9:02am

On my way into town a coupe of weeks ago the first week back on the bike (heavy old commuter) after major surgery and a deliveroo guy I passed on an electric bike caught up with me a few lights later. 'You're very fast'. Made my day, as i was feeling (and still am!) fat, unfit and slow.
I hate the you're hot comments tbh, but ymmv. Last week the annual summer tits and ass shouting started up again :rolleyes:

Annie get your Run · 01-05-2018 9:23am

When I saw the thread title I assumed you meant with fellow cyclist commuters

, have had loads of those in recent weeks as the sun made an appearance and people lifted their heads for the first time all winter

.

I usually have a positive car commuter experience coming through the Phoenix Park, at the roundabout junctions most cars stop and give way to cyclists crossing - Ii always give them a thank you wave.

When someone waits and then gives me space when overtaking I always give them a wave too, had one just yesterday!

rushfan · 01-05-2018 9:36am

I do this frequently, did it many times yesterday, just to show my appreciation & thanks for being patient and considerate. It's not always like this though, some unnecessary close passes too.

Eamonnator · 01-05-2018 10:26am

I'm a 66 year old male cyclist.
If I called out "you're hot" to any cyclist, unless they were actually on fire, I would expect to be chased down and berated, at the least. And rightly so.
To be honest, it sounds a bit creepy to me.
Maybe, I'm just old fashioned.
I only mentioned my age and gender, because the O.P. did.

Changed word sex for gender

Vel · 01-05-2018 10:30am

Eamonnator wrote: »

I'm a 66 year old male cyclist.
If I called out "you're hot" to any cyclist, unless they were actually on fire, I would expect to be chased down and berated, at the least. And rightly so.
To be honest, it sounds a bit creepy to me.
Maybe, I'm just old fashioned.
I only mentioned my age and sex, because the O.P. did.

Ah it was grand! I took it in the spirit it was meant. He said it, gave me a smile and off he went. It wasn't like he had his lad in his hand while he said it!!! I certainly didn't find it creepy or offensive.

And just to note, I have had interactions particularly from passengers in cars shouting stuff out the window which have been creepy and offensive but this wasn't.

mr spuckler · 01-05-2018 10:42am

Vel wrote: »

Ah it was grand! I took it in the spirit it was meant. He said it, gave me a smile and off he went. It wasn't like he had his lad in his hand while he said it!!! I certainly didn't find it creepy or offensive.

And just to note, I have had interactions particularly from passengers in cars shouting stuff out the window which have been creepy and offensive but this wasn't.

actual LOL! I'm glad I hadn't yet drank my tea when I was reading that!

this morning coming towards the east link bridge from east wall road the person driving a range rover behind me just patiently waited both on approach to the bridge and the whole way across also. I'd say they left a good 20 metres or more at all times, which is such a rarity on this stretch which is normally the least pleasant part of my cycle. needless to say I waved in acknowledgement as I turned off and they passed me.

terrydel · 01-05-2018 11:18am

In any encounter with others on the road, take the advice of Dalton in Roadhouse - be nice!

It immediately disarms people.

Vel · 01-05-2018 11:25am

I feel that things like giving a little wave when a motorist waits patiently behind or a wave if they are ahead of you turning left but wait to let you go on straight even etc. helps foster good feeling.

Ray Bloody Purchase · 01-05-2018 11:34am

Vel wrote: »

I feel that things like giving a little wave when a motorist waits patiently behind or a wave if they are ahead of you turning left but wait to let you go on straight even etc. helps foster good feeling.

Someone gave that advice here lately, specifically to make eye contact. When stopped at lights, i always look back now and give them a little wave to indicate if i'm turning right, prior to lights going green.

Motorists really seem to appreciate it. I always get a little wave back or the flashers if they're going by.

tomasrojo · 01-05-2018 11:58am

Vel wrote: »

I feel that things like giving a little wave when a motorist waits patiently behind or a wave if they are ahead of you turning left but wait to let you go on straight even etc. helps foster good feeling.

I'm a big thank-you waver.

Actually, I find most people are pretty nice, and I end up waving quite a lot most days. Though I think people are nicer to me when I'm on the bakfiets, because of the kids usually with me, and because it's an honorary half-car.

rollingscone · 01-05-2018 12:55pm

nee wrote: »

On my way into town a coupe of weeks ago the first week back on the bike (heavy old commuter) after major surgery and a deliveroo guy I passed on an electric bike caught up with me a few lights later. 'You're very fast'. Made my day, as i was feeling (and still am!) fat, unfit and slow.
I hate the you're hot comments tbh, but ymmv. Last week the annual summer tits and ass oshouting started up again :rolleyes:

I've often held back on complimenting:
1. Pace
2. Skillz
3. Bikes
4. Kit

For fear of creeping out or annoying women on bikes (my generally intimidating and ogreish presence doesn't help).

The idea of shouting out "you're hot" makes me nauseous...the hubris of youth I guess. Not that you aren't entitled to enjoy it OP.

My only memorable commuter interactions are the silent looks of approval shared with fellow law abiders when we both stop at lights.

magicbastarder · 01-05-2018 12:59pm

last time i complimented a cyclist was with a call of 'nice bike!' and as i was passing, realised it was a friend of mine who'd bought it on my recommendation.

eeeee · 01-05-2018 1:01pm

I did once shout nice bike at a guy who was on a Klein road bike with a savage shot paint job. Probably still one of the nicest bikes over ever seen in the flesh.

I said it to a guy at a race once who had the same bike as me.

I've actually had a few people compliment the commuter, as he's an original 42 year old racer, but they don't see how heavy he is under all his chrome

If I see a particularly nice bike I will say it if it's appropriate/ I'm close enough. I have an awful tenancy to notice bikes first before the person riding them.

tomasrojo · 01-05-2018 1:02pm

I suspect some Larry David will creep into this thread shortly.

Brian · 01-05-2018 1:04pm

If I'm approaching a minor road on the left and there is a car waiting to turn out of it, I've now taken to giving a "thanks for not killing me" wave if they don't pull out in front of me.

tomasrojo · 01-05-2018 1:06pm

Brian wrote: »

If I'm approaching a minor road on the left and there is a car waiting to turn out of it, I've now taken to giving a "thanks for not killing me" wave if they don't pull out in front of me.

Yeah, me too, but it's a very small, conflicted wave.

eeeee · 01-05-2018 1:07pm

Brian wrote: »

If I'm approaching a minor road on the left and there is a car waiting to turn out of it, I've now taken to giving a "thanks for not killing me" wave if they don't pull out in front of me.

Same

ETA if they move back out of the road to let me by so I don't have to get caught by traffic on the right I give them a thumbs up

MB Lacey · 01-05-2018 2:56pm

Commuting through Ranelagh, I've shouted a very sincere 'Nice bike' as I passed a cyclist who was cycling a really cool bike.
She was about 9 years old and cycling to school an old Chopper with her father cycling behind.

She owned the cycle lane that morning.

Diemos · 01-05-2018 4:26pm

I complimented a guy on a lovely bike while stopped at the lights on Pearse street (it was a lovely bike) , then I asked him if he wanted to swap.
He just stared blankly at me, in a suit on a dublin bike, and cycled off.

It was funny in my head.......

Wishbone Ash · 01-05-2018 4:37pm

Brian wrote: »

If I'm approaching a minor road on the left and there is a car waiting to turn out of it, I've now taken to giving a "thanks for not killing me" wave if they don't pull out in front of me.

I'd find that a bit strange - i.e. thanking someone for doing what they're supposed to do.

I would always give a salute of appreciation if a driver allows me to pull out to avoid an obstacle in my path etc. or if I have made an error of judgement.

I also tend to make a friendly wave at small children in the rear seats if I'm stopped in traffic. Maybe that's a bit weird.

Alek · 01-05-2018 4:44pm

I also tend to make a friendly wave at small children in the rear seats if I'm stopped in traffic. Maybe that's a bit weird.

Just don't hand them candy and you'll be fine.

el tel · 01-05-2018 4:55pm

I hope "You're Hot" guy is a boardsie and comes here with his version of events and what he was thinking.

I can't imagine ever saying that to someone on a bike and riding off. You might say it when you want to get it on with that person, or get a slap on the face, but then you wouldn't just ride away.

Unknown Soldier · 01-05-2018 7:37pm

Wishbone Ash wrote: »

I'd find that a bit strange - i.e. thanking someone for doing what they're supposed to do.<snip>

It's not thanking them for doing something they should do, it's below, really.

Vel wrote: »

I feel that things like giving a little wave when a motorist waits patiently behind or a wave if they are ahead of you turning left but wait to let you go on straight even etc. helps foster good feeling.

Brian wrote: »

If I'm approaching a minor road on the left and there is a car waiting to turn out of it, I've now taken to giving a "thanks for not killing me" wave if they don't pull out in front of me.

^^ Though more, thanks for not being a Dick, rather than not killing me.

Wishbone Ash · 01-05-2018 8:12pm

Unknown Soldier wrote: »

It's not thanking them for doing something they should do, it's below, really...

Well a driver coming from a minor road is obliged to yield right of way. I don't think any cyclist would thank a motorist for waiting before entering a roundabout, or waiting at a red light. It's the same thing to me.

brownbinman · 01-05-2018 8:14pm

tomasrojo wrote: »

I'm a big thank-you waver.

Actually, I find most people are pretty nice, and I end up waving quite a lot most days. Though I think people are nicer to me when I'm on the bakfiets, because of the kids usually with me, and because it's an honorary half-car.

Me too, especially if they wait, or see me coming and move in. Always thought nice to be nice, but since I'm on bike more often I think small things like that will change some drivers minds about cyclists

Budawanny · 01-05-2018 8:50pm

Diemos wrote: »

I complimented a guy on a lovely bike while stopped at the lights on Pearse street (it was a lovely bike) , then I asked him if he wanted to swap.
He just stared blankly at me, in a suit on a dublin bike, and cycled off.

It was funny in my head.......

:-D :-D

Positive Encounters with Fellow Commuters

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