New Years Eve Weddings

Mango Joe · 24-01-2020 1:34pm #1

Hi there,

Just looking for your thoughts on New Years Eve Weddings as it came up in conversation recently & also where someone on here was testing the waters for a St. Stephens day wedding.

I'm of the opinion that there are certain days across the 365 days in any given calendar year that people look forward to making plans around and celebrating on their own terms.

New Years Eve would be a big one for a lot of people surely when they'll want to be making plans for weekends away, hotel breaks and whatever else.

Isn't it a bit selfish and self-absorbed to send out invitations to a few hundred people saying cancel your own New Years Eve plans, we're getting married that day?

Bearing in mind also that in a typical couple there's often one party totally unconnected to anyone involved and but still has to attend with their partner and soldier on through a very long morning, afternoon, evening and night.

- Finally what days would you consider to be off-limits? St. Stephens day for me would be a huge no way call as its so intrusive on everyone's family Christmas break and so on.

Just curious as to what the general consensus is here as apparently this trend is getting more and more common

woodchuck · 24-01-2020 1:43pm

Isn't it a bit selfish and self-absorbed to send out invitations to a few hundred people saying cancel your own New Years Eve plans, we're getting married that day?

I wouldn't go that far, but I wouldn't be a fan of a New Years Eve Wedding myself. Same for any days around the Christmas period.

I know that with so many people living abroad it can make sense as a lot of people come home at that time of year anyway. But it's already a hugely expensive and stressful time of year, that it would feel like a massive burden to me.

The OH was invited to a stag abroad around that time of year before. Apparently the logic was "well if people are flying home to Dublin anyway, why not come to Prague for a few days". Needless to say, the people who were travelling home for Christmas were not impressed at the idea of having to up and leave their families who they rarely get to see for a few days!! And it was very unfair on the wives/girlfriends from abroad who were expected to stay in Ireland with the husbands/boyfriends families on their own for a few days - I think a few opted out of the stag for that reason alone.

stargazer 68 · 24-01-2020 1:46pm

NYE is a great idea - usually sit in and watch rubbish on the TV so a wedding would be great IMO

Triceratops Ballet · 24-01-2020 1:56pm

Mango Joe wrote:

Isn't it a bit selfish and self-absorbed to send out invitations to a few hundred people saying cancel your own New Years Eve plans, we're getting married that day?

I love a NYE wedding. It beats a house party or freezing your ass off trying to get a cab that's just never coming

24-01-2020 1:59pm

Triceratops Ballet wrote: »

I love a NYE wedding. It beats a house party or freezing your ass off trying to get a cab that's just never coming

Yes Id have to agree with this, it beats being in an overcrowded pub, I would like to go to a wedding on New Years Eve for a change, it would be something different to do

GingerLily · 24-01-2020 2:00pm

I love NYE wedings, I've been to two and both were great!!

xalot · 24-01-2020 2:01pm

Depends who is getting married. If it's a mate then I can think of no better way than to spend new years. However if it's some cousin of my other half then nope, no thanks.

threetrees · 24-01-2020 2:03pm

NYE weddings are fine, but don't go making them black tie events!

The dancing is in full swing, then it gets a bit boring, so having the New Year shenanigans brings back the party spirit.

lozenges · 24-01-2020 2:22pm

I have volunteered to work on NYE 3 years out of the last 4 because I generally find it's rubbish. A wedding would be a nice alternative way to spend it IMO.

24-01-2020 2:27pm

one of the best NYE I spent was at a wedding.
I think most people just find NYE to be a big anti-climax.
lots of family & friends together at a wedding is the best kind of NYE for me.

maconof · 24-01-2020 2:27pm

Attended a NYE wedding this year, enjoyed it and would welcome another one. Was something a bit different and good craic too.

maximoose · 24-01-2020 2:29pm

New Years Eve is a pile of shíte, wouldn't mind a wedding on that date.

A wedding a few days either side of Christmas is far worse IMO.

Effects · 24-01-2020 2:31pm

Mango Joe wrote: »

Isn't it a bit selfish and self-absorbed to send out invitations to a few hundred people saying cancel your own New Years Eve plans, we're getting married that day?

It's bit selfish if they send out the invites on the 21st of December.

But who makes plans for New Years as far in advance of when you'd realistically be getting an invite anyway?

Meauldsegosha · 24-01-2020 2:48pm

We've been to 2 NYE weddings and they were great fun. We don't usually do much on NYE so it was a nice alternative. Also hairdressers and beauty salons are usually open on NYE so I don't the hassle of doing it myself. A St Stephen's day wedding wouldn't interest me as much. That's very much a family day for us. And I'd never get a hairdressers or beauty salon open that day.

GhostofKNugget · 24-01-2020 2:54pm

When I was a childless young whippersnapper, a NYE wedding would have been grand but these days Christmas is all about my family and having to go to a wedding over the festive period is a pain in the hole. I'd honestly rather spend my hard earned money on my wife and kids and their presents than have to squirrel away a load of money for a wedding the week after Christmas - it doesn't matter who it is or how close they are to me.

jr86 · 24-01-2020 3:24pm

Mango Joe wrote: »

Isn't it a bit selfish and self-absorbed to send out invitations to a few hundred people saying cancel your own New Years Eve plans, we're getting married that day?

Or...

You could say its actually considerate of them to hold it at a time where people aren't under pressure to get annual leave, where friends/family based abroad can easily attend.

Lets be honest very few people actually have better things to be doing on new years anyway, than just going for a bog-standard night on the town where places are packed, taxis are scarce - a wedding is a great alternative way to spend the evening/night

Love the idea of an NYE wedding myself!

Mango Joe · 24-01-2020 3:27pm

Effects wrote: »

It's bit selfish if they send out the invites on the 21st of December.

But who makes plans for New Years as far in advance of when you'd realistically be getting an invite anyway?

But it's not the clash of plans that people are citing as a potential issue, its scheduling a very notable day for your wedding which people really do look forward to making their own plans on and a lot of people resent this because they feel you're taking that opportunity away from them.

This is despite the fact that a wedding could be scheduled on any other day of the year.

Is that not being a bit narcissistic? Like "oh dahling, its all about me and my special day"?!

jr86 · 24-01-2020 3:33pm

Mango Joe wrote: »

But it's not the clash of plans that people are citing as a potential issue, its scheduling a very notable day for your wedding which people really do look forward to making their own plans on and a lot of people resent this because they feel you're taking that opportunity away from them.

This is despite the fact that a wedding could be scheduled on any other day of the year.

Is that not being a bit narcissistic? Like "oh dahling, its all about me and my special day"?!

Do they really though?

The majority of my own friends and acquaintances from a multitude of different backgrounds cannot stand NYE and see it as a pure nuisance.

I can honestly think of no-one who actually looks forward to it as a pure milestone night out or anything like that

woodchuck · 24-01-2020 3:33pm

But it's not the clash of plans that people are citing as a potential issue, its scheduling a very notable day for your wedding which people really do look forward to making their own plans on and a lot of people resent this because they feel you're taking that opportunity away from them.

Even though I wouldn't be keen on a NYE wedding, it's because the general time of year, not because of the day itself - does anyone really consider it a notable day?

I hate going out on NYE. I don't know any/many people that really look forward. I highly doubt anyone feels that an opportunity is taken away from them. It's more about the expense and time of year - nothing wrong with the date itself. It could be the night before or after New Years Eve and I still wouldn't be keen to go.

Triceratops Ballet · 24-01-2020 3:35pm

Mango Joe wrote:

Is that not being a bit narcissistic? Like "oh dahling, its all about me and my special day"?!

That's just weddings in general, hardly exclusive to NYE!

theteal · 24-01-2020 3:44pm

I've come through the wedding phase of the social circle so we've gone from 2-3 weddings a year down to none that I can think of in the last couple (although a handful of turned down invites) so I can say my disdain for weddings has somewhat evaporated and I'd probably look forward to an auld knees up.

New years on the other hand is a load of wombling c0ck. If not for Jools I'd be in bed for 10. With the growing family, the whole xmas period is a much quieter and less rambunctious affair.

I would be all about a NYE wedding tbh.

miamee · 24-01-2020 3:56pm

I've been to one NYE wedding and it was good fun. A good night to have it as most people are not too fussed about new years eve (regardless of what others in the thread have said, I don't know a single person who gets excited about NYE) but are happy to have a reason to be out dancing and drinking in nice, uncrowded surroundings with friends and family.

AlanG · 24-01-2020 3:57pm

An NYE wedding would be great if you allowed people to bring their kids. It would be selfish to expect people in the 5-15 age bracket to attend an NYE wedding without their kids so either invite kids or make it clear that not turning up is perfectly understandable.
Also take into account that taxis and hotels aver very difficult to get so make some arrangements and send invites very early. Many hotels are booked up from summer onwards.

endacl · 24-01-2020 4:01pm

Don’t mind what day it’s on, once I’m not expected to go!

24-01-2020 4:07pm

endacl wrote: »

Don’t mind what day it’s on, once I’m not expected to go!

I'd say you're great craic at part......eh, nevermind.

lazygal · 24-01-2020 4:35pm

GhostofKNugget wrote: »

When I was a childless young whippersnapper, a NYE wedding would have been grand but these days Christmas is all about my family and having to go to a wedding over the festive period is a pain in the hole. I'd honestly rather spend my hard earned money on my wife and kids and their presents than have to squirrel away a load of money for a wedding the week after Christmas - it doesn't matter who it is or how close they are to me.

Same. NYE isn't a special night for us but any wedding over Christmas is always a pain in terms of getting babysitting. The last Christmas wedding we went to was honestly not worth all the hassle.

Faith · 24-01-2020 4:37pm

As has been covered, I’d love to go to a wedding on NYE. I hate going out on NYE because it’s too busy and impossible to get home, but I’d love to celebrate it at a wedding where I’d be staying at the hotel as well. It would be a total win-win for me.

Effects · 26-01-2020 6:40pm

Mango Joe wrote: »

Its scheduling a very notable day for your wedding which people really do look forward to making their own plans on

NYE is usually pretty overrated as a night out though, isn't it?

eviltwin · 26-01-2020 7:28pm

The expense involved in a Christmas wedding would put me off.

Effects · 27-01-2020 12:03am

eviltwin wrote: »

The expense involved in a Christmas wedding would put me off.

Is it that much different to any other wedding?

eviltwin · 27-01-2020 12:17am

Effects wrote: »

Is it that much different to any other wedding?

Well Christmas is an expensive time of year. It's one thing if you know about it months in advance and can plan your finances around it but getting an invite through the door in November would throw me out completely.

whatdoicare · 27-01-2020 12:19am

In my 20s child free and full of money, yeah NYE wedding would have been great craic but now in my late 30s with children, no way, huge pain in the hole. Any wedding invitation I get at that time of year, unless its immediate family, is going straight into the bin.

I did notice that for friends who had weddings around Xmas and NYE out of say 150 people most would say yes initially and then a good quarter of that would just not show up for the wedding. They found that aspect hugely annoying.

Especially people with families or older people. Everyone is broke around then and sick of eating and celebrating, no one wants to be squeezing into a wedding outfit and forking out for wedding gifts and babysitters and then sitting through a wedding and yet more food and drink.

skallywag · 27-01-2020 2:15pm

The only aspect which would irk me about New Year's Eve would be the accommodation / taxi element, as these could both be problematic. I would have nothing apart from that against the day though, I do not place any real value of New Year's Eve.

St. Stephens's day would be a different animal altogether though. There is no way I would even consider going to a wedding then. It would also leave me questioning the intelligence / sanity of those who issue the invite.

Loveinapril · 27-01-2020 4:43pm

I have never really been into NYE so a wedding would have been a fun night out in the past. I have kids now so getting a babysitter would be difficult. Although unless it's a friend getting married, having kids is going to be our excuse for declining wedding invites for the forseeable.

Addle · 27-01-2020 4:50pm

I think NYE is the best night of the year for a wedding!

I too find weddings expensive, but if I haven’t the money at the time to give a present, then I wait and give the couple something a couple of or a few months later.

julyjane · 27-01-2020 5:10pm

You're free to decline any invitation to any event you don't want to go to. I'd love to go to a NYE wedding because it would break up the boredom of "the Christmas period". If I couldn't get childcare then I wouldn't go but sometimes at that stage of the school holidays they like a night or 2 with grandparents or cousins.

SozBbz · 27-01-2020 6:46pm

I've been to one (again the couple were based abroad so it definitely made sense) and it was great - I doubt most people had better plans TBQH!

Stephens Day is a bit different, I'd be less into that idea as its a bank holiday and if people have traveled to their family homes, they probably want to hang around the next day too rather than racing back to real life.

NYE is a normal working day for a lot of people although loads will take it off anyway depending on their line of work. New Years Day is usually just a quiet day off, so its actually pretty ideal.

rainbowtrout · 27-01-2020 11:25pm

I don't go out NYE, haven't for years so it wouldn't bother me if it was on then, but Stephen's Day, no way. Most people want to spend a day or two with their families, have spent Christmas Day horsing turkey and ham, a box of Roses and a few drinks into them. I doubt they want to be getting up early on Stephen's Day to get ready for a wedding, fit into wedding clothes after the feed the day before and heading off potentially a couple of hours away for a wedding. Nobody needs that hassle in their lives. Even from a drink driving point of view, for a lot it would mean they wouldn't be having a few drinks on Christmas Day if they had to drive the following morning. I'd say anyone that is idiot enough to try and have their wedding on Stephen's Day would be getting a lot of rejections. It's also one of the few nights of the year that pubs are wedged and everyone is home and people you haven't seen from one end of the year to another come out of the woodwork.

Incidentally my birthday is Stephen's Day and when I had my 21st I had it about a week beforehand because people have family plans that night. Not a chance people would be on for going to a wedding.

bbbbb · 27-01-2020 11:43pm

I would guess most venues would either be closed, or charge a significant premium to host a wedding on NYE

Addle · 27-01-2020 11:50pm

It’s not a bank holiday. I don’t see why they would.

julyjane · 28-01-2020 8:40am

rainbowtrout wrote: »

I'd say anyone that is idiot enough to try and have their wedding on Stephen's Day would be getting a lot of rejections.

that could work out in their favour if a couple have a lot "obligation invitees"

baby and crumble · 28-01-2020 11:08am

Another thing to think about with a St Stephens Day wedding is the hassle of not being able to get in touch with your vendors in the immediate few days before the wedding. That would be quite stressful, there were loads of little 'bits' that we needed to do the day before, you'd have to know that you're a really organised person because you're not going to be able to get any of those last minute things for possibly 4 or more days, depending what way the days fall. That'd be a nightmare.

From a guest perspective I'd love a NYE wedding, like others have said it'd break the monotony but you would need to make sure that there's enough local accommodation block booked for guests wherever it is, at a decent enough price. Getting home afterwards on NYE might be a pain.

GhostofKNugget · 28-01-2020 11:12am

julyjane wrote: »

that could work out in their favour if a couple have a lot "obligation invitees"

But it would be a complete pain in the arse to anyone who was obliged to attend such as close friends and immediate family. Anyone that gets married on Stephen's Day would really only be thinking of themselves and not giving any consideration to others at all.

JustMe,K · 28-01-2020 11:13am

It wouldn't be for me, but I can see why a couple might think its a good idea - most of the people they are inviting are probably close family & friends who they would love to spend NYE with anyway. Plus the already mentioned aspect of people living abroad being home for the few days, a lot of people not needing to worry about getting time off work etc.

NYE is very overrated anyway IMO, but as I have a core of people close to me I spend NYE with I would be unlikely to accept a wedding invitation for that date unless the people getting married meant a lot to me, or the people I normally spend NYE with would also be attending.

28-01-2020 11:14am

NYE wedding? Hell yeah. Proper party and then into the countdown?
Much better than suffering through RTÉ nonsense.

julyjane · 28-01-2020 3:08pm

I'd personally rather not bother with the countdown at all and then be like "ah jaysus it's 2 o clock happy New year". I remember one NYE we went out with friends and were moving onto another place a few minutes walk away and missed the countdown but I for one was relieved

The Cool · 28-01-2020 6:08pm

I'd hate a Stephens Day wedding, nobody wants to spend Christmas day getting themselves ready for a long, glam day out the day after. I think most people don't want to do anything more than visit family or walk off the turkey on Stephens Day. Never mind that it'd be impossible to get hair and makeup booked for the morning if you were so inclined. But most of all, what about non-local people travelling. You're basically deciding how or where they have to spend Christmas.

I always liked the idea of a NYE wedding but this Christmas, it seemed everyone I knew got hit with a really bad dose of the cold or flu at some point over the Christmas period, the form would be rubbish!

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts · 31-01-2020 12:08am

jr86 wrote: »

Or...

You could say its actually considerate of them to hold it at a time where people aren't under pressure to get annual leave, where friends/family based abroad can easily attend.

Lets be honest very few people actually have better things to be doing on new years anyway, than just going for a bog-standard night on the town where places are packed, taxis are scarce - a wedding is a great alternative way to spend the evening/night

Love the idea of an NYE wedding myself!

I love having nothing better to do on NYE. The Christmas season is about cosiness and films and family for me. Sitting in, ignoring the bleak midwinter. I’m not keen on Christmas weddings.

New Years Eve Weddings

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