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Sexism you have personally experienced or have heard of? *READ POST 1*

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    #1502
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Don't forget, it's our own fault for allowing rape culture to exist!

    Wait, what?

    So you're saying that all men are responsible? And not just the men that rape. Or the women that rape.

    I'm sorry, but the opinion you have is exactly the problem!


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    #1503
    Pawwed Rig
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Home & Garden Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 22,303 CMod ✭✭✭✭Pawwed Rig


    Deleted User wrote: »
    I'm sorry, but the opinion you have is exactly the problem!

    I think he was being facetious


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    #1504
    Amirani
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 12,521 Mod ✭✭✭✭Amirani


    Pawwed Rig wrote: »
    I think he was being facetious

    So was Buttonftw I think. :p


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    #1505
    Henry9
    Registered Users Posts: 418 ✭✭Henry9


    Yes, if you are a white heterosexual male you bear collective responsibility.
    As well as taking responsibility for your own problems you are also responsible for everyone else's.


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    #1506
    Panthro
    Registered Users Posts: 14,701 ✭✭✭✭Panthro


    maybe
    be interesting to see how this pans out
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2667877/Headmistress-sex-pupil-uniform-played-truant-phoned-school-referred-mummy.html


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    #1507
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 25,611 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    So even now it's my fault? :P


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    #1508
    Soft Falling Rain
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,315 ✭✭✭Soft Falling Rain


    Not sure if it's classed as sexism but I've always found women to think it's ok to make personal insults towards me. Things such as "whats up short arse" or "hi baldie".

    These things don't bother me and I laugh them off, but I always have to be careful in my retort. As not that I'm in any inclined to say such things, but I replied with something like "all good big bird" I'd be strung up and vilified.


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    #1509
    ancapailldorcha
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 37,391 CMod ✭✭✭✭ancapailldorcha


    maybe
    Panthro wrote: »
    be interesting to see how this pans out
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2667877/Headmistress-sex-pupil-uniform-played-truant-phoned-school-referred-mummy.html

    2 words: Suspended sentence.

    We sat again for an hour and a half discussing maps and figures and always getting back to that most damnable creation of the perverted ingenuity of man - the County of Tyrone.

    H. H. Asquith



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    #1510
    GalwayGuy2
    Registered Users Posts: 2,269 ✭✭✭GalwayGuy2


    Soft Falling Rain wrote: »
    Not sure if it's classed as sexism but I've always found women to think it's ok to make personal insults towards me. Things such as "whats up short arse" or "hi baldie".

    These things don't bother me and I laugh them off, but I always have to be careful in my retort. As not that I'm in any inclined to say such things, but I replied with something like "all good big bird" I'd be strung up and vilified.

    I'd let that slide for the sake of personal relations.

    One of the reasons could be treating you, as you are a man, as men treat other men. But, it must be hard not to have the natural reply of 'big bird.'

    Perhaps aims towards something else? Big hair? Shorty? Or just go with what's working.


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    #1511
    Zulu
    Registered Users Posts: 10,965 ✭✭✭✭Zulu


    No
    Soft Falling Rain wrote: »
    Not sure if it's classed as sexism but I've always found women to think it's ok to make personal insults towards me. Things such as "whats up short arse" or "hi baldie".

    These things don't bother me and I laugh them off, but I always have to be careful in my retort. As not that I'm in any inclined to say such things, but I replied with something like "all good big bird" I'd be strung up and vilified.
    Not sure it's sexist, and im not sure you'd be vilified (because you're male).

    I've been in the same boat, but I always give back. And I've found people are (generally) cool. That said I tend to hit back proportionately; I don't go for the jugular unless I've been hurt badly.

    Some girls, like boys enjoy light hearted snagging - I don't think it's a gender thing


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    #1512
    Soft Falling Rain
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,315 ✭✭✭Soft Falling Rain


    Aye, my automatic reply seems to be a good natured **** off, that usually goes down well.


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    #1513
    Piliger
    Registered Users Posts: 6,741 ✭✭✭Piliger


    Zulu wrote: »
    Not sure it's sexist, and im not sure you'd be vilified (because you're male).

    I've been in the same boat, but I always give back. And I've found people are (generally) cool. That said I tend to hit back proportionately; I don't go for the jugular unless I've been hurt badly.

    Some girls, like boys enjoy light hearted snagging - I don't think it's a gender thing

    It's not that the insult is sexist per se, I think. It is that if a man lets fly with similar insults, he will be vilified and attacked as a misogynist ....


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    #1514
    Zulu
    Registered Users Posts: 10,965 ✭✭✭✭Zulu


    No
    Piliger wrote: »
    , he will be vilified and attacked as a misogynist ....
    I don't think so (not in my experience)


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    #1515
    Galwayguy35
    Registered Users Posts: 16,316 ✭✭✭✭Galwayguy35


    Soft Falling Rain wrote: »
    Not sure if it's classed as sexism but I've always found women to think it's ok to make personal insults towards me. Things such as "whats up short arse" or "hi baldie".

    These things don't bother me and I laugh them off, but I always have to be careful in my retort. As not that I'm in any inclined to say such things, but I replied with something like "all good big bird" I'd be strung up and vilified.

    Not fully the same but I met someone for a first date once and the first two things she said to me were "wow you look old " followed by "and you are bald as well".


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    #1516
    D'Agger
    Registered Users Posts: 13,385 ✭✭✭✭D'Agger


    No
    Galwayguy35 wrote: »
    Not fully the same but I met someone for a first date once and the first two things she said to me were "wow you look old " followed by "and you are bald as well".

    That's just poor manners and an inability to judge an audience imo - I mean what do you even say in response to that barring trying to make some sort of joke to move past it quickly, poor people skills!


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    #1517
    jackofalltrades
    Registered Users Posts: 3,240 ✭✭✭jackofalltrades


    maybe
    Galwayguy35 wrote: »
    Not fully the same but I met someone for a first date once and the first two things she said to me were "wow you look old " followed by "and you are bald as well".
    :eek: What did you say in response?

    I take it there wasn't a second date.


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    #1518
    newport2
    Registered Users Posts: 2,581 ✭✭✭newport2


    Galwayguy35 wrote: »
    Not fully the same but I met someone for a first date once and the first two things she said to me were "wow you look old " followed by "and you are bald as well".

    To which I hope you replied "wow you look single" followed by "and you probably wonder why as well".....


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    #1519
    curlzy
    Registered Users Posts: 1,708 ✭✭✭curlzy


    newport2 wrote: »
    To which I hope you replied "wow you look single" followed by "and you probably wonder why as well".....

    Oh god that's genius :D:D:D


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    #1520
    Piliger
    Registered Users Posts: 6,741 ✭✭✭Piliger


    I don't agree. Being ignorant back doesn't achieve anything except lowering yourself. Something like that happened to me about four years ago and I simply stood up and walked out - In my personal view a better response.


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    #1521
    Galwayguy35
    Registered Users Posts: 16,316 ✭✭✭✭Galwayguy35


    jackofalltrades wrote: »
    :eek: What did you say in response?

    I take it there wasn't a second date.

    To be honest I didn't really say anything, sometimes people think something like going bald is a trivial issue for men and comment on it not realising how it is affecting the person.

    No there was no second date.


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    #1522
    Carlos Orange
    Registered Users Posts: 2,499 ✭✭✭Carlos Orange


    No
    Galwayguy35 wrote: »
    To be honest I didn't really say anything, sometimes people think something like going bald is a trivial issue for men and comment on it not realising how it is affecting the person.

    No there was no second date.

    I don't find it a bothersome thing myself (my hair situation) but there isn't really a positive way to take somebody mentioning it. It is like grey hairs. You either have them or don't, you care or you don't but I can't think of a reason to bring it up to a complete stranger except as a put down.


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    #1523
    Soft Falling Rain
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,315 ✭✭✭Soft Falling Rain


    Piliger wrote: »
    It's not that the insult is sexist per se, I think. It is that if a man lets fly with similar insults, he will be vilified and attacked as a misogynist ....

    I was coming from the angle that I've found some women to think that they're entitled to make such comments on a guy's appearance. But if you flipped the roles there would be outrage.

    Meh anyway, I'm quite thick skinned at this stage. But I do have to laugh at some large or a not particularly glam woman passing comment towards a bloke, while it won't even enter her mind that she might get a bit back in kind.

    As I said, it's that entitlement to give but not to take that seems quit sexist to me.

    I should clarify that seems to be especially a problem with random women on nights I walk by, I don't even know them.


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    #1524
    cletus van damme
    Closed Accounts Posts: 960 ✭✭✭cletus van damme


    my gf had a row with another woman in a supermarket car park
    after said row we were approached by the woman from the other car.

    She started ranting at us . I asked her to stop and then she shouted/roared at me "You're a typical man".

    Kinda odd remark. sexist bitch.:rolleyes:


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    #1525
    Panthro
    Registered Users Posts: 14,701 ✭✭✭✭Panthro


    maybe
    cletus van damme wrote: »
    my gf had a row with another woman in a supermarket car park
    after said row we were approached by the woman from the other car.

    She started ranting at us . I asked her to stop and then she shouted/roared at me "You're a typical man".

    Kinda odd remark. sexist bitch.:rolleyes:

    Typical man alright, trying to defuse a situation.
    If there was less like yourself and more people sticking their noses in where it's not needed, the world would be a better place! :pac:
    (I jest, of course)


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    #1526
    Henry9
    Registered Users Posts: 418 ✭✭Henry9


    ancapailldorcha wrote: »
    2 words: Suspended sentence.
    She might get done for that, after all she's not young and attractive, so can't play the poor misguided girl, led astray by her female emotions.


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    #1527
    ancapailldorcha
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 37,391 CMod ✭✭✭✭ancapailldorcha


    maybe
    Henry9 wrote: »
    She might get done for that, after all she's not young and attractive, so can't play the poor misguided girl, led astray by her female emotions.

    I doubt it. She'll cop onto some way to play the victim card, elicit sympathy and, at worst receive a tap on the wrist. A man would be in prison at this point.

    We sat again for an hour and a half discussing maps and figures and always getting back to that most damnable creation of the perverted ingenuity of man - the County of Tyrone.

    H. H. Asquith



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    #1528
    Icemancometh
    Registered Users Posts: 854 ✭✭✭Icemancometh


    No
    An article on slate.com about ogling players during the World Cup:

    http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2014/06/world_cup_players_are_hot_here_s_why_it_s_ok_to_objectify_them.html

    A good article. which makes some good points, and on the whole I agree with the author. A few points about the double standards are interesting.

    1. When female and gay gazes are applied to the soccer pitch, the results are fun, goofy, and even campy.

    The author's contention is that it's fun to objectify a male athlete, but demeaning towards a female athlete. I doubt Ronaldo or whoever else is going to complain, but the "it's ok when I do it" attitude makes very real complaints about the marginalisation of less attractive female athletes ring hollow.

    2. And if straight men are forced to wade through a few slideshows of extremely attractive men when they’re searching for the score? Everyone wins.

    Probably just a glib way of ending the article, I find it revealing as to the author's state of mind. The view is of straight men as a homogenous group, and one in which she is in opposition to. The chance to get one back is not to be missed.

    Overall, a harmless issue I feel, and no one will get worked up about it. The defence of a fun activity that is shamed in reverse is enjoyable to my mind.


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    #1529
    Panthro
    Registered Users Posts: 14,701 ✭✭✭✭Panthro


    maybe
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2672950/Woman-teacher-sent-2-000-sex-texts-pupil-Staff-member-30-used-social-network-send-explicit-messages-Year-11-boy.html
    Police later concluded that no offence had been committed, but the panel said the incident – which became ‘the subject of rumour and gossip’ among pupils and staff’ – amounted to serious misconduct.

    I find the bolded bit odd, at least the teaching council took action.


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    #1530
    Liam McPoyle
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,846 ✭✭✭✭Liam McPoyle


    No
    Galwayguy35 wrote: »
    Not fully the same but I met someone for a first date once and the first two things she said to me were "wow you look old " followed by "and you are bald as well".

    I'm presuming that because she didn't know what you looked like that this was an online date?

    I agree that her saying that was bad manners but if it was an online date and that was her reaction, I'm presuming you had misleading photos up, that's not a great way to behave either (if it is the case) IMO.


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    #1531
    Zulu
    Registered Users Posts: 10,965 ✭✭✭✭Zulu


    No
    Business Cat wrote: »
    I'm presuming that because she didn't know what you looked like that this was an online date?

    I agree that her saying that was bad manners but if it was an online date and that was her reaction, I'm presuming you had misleading photos up, that's not a great way to behave either (if it is the case) IMO.

    Fairly presumptuous just to have a pop at the op. Poor form.


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