Picture and relationship

fin12 · 21-01-2021 2:28am #1

Would a guy ask someone who he would consider relationship potential for a picture n I dont mean the like I’ve never seen u before so swap photos? Like is that a red flag they are just interested in sex.?

Deeper Blue · 21-01-2021 2:55am

fin12 wrote: »

Would a guy ask someone who he would consider relationship potential for a picture n I dont mean the like I’ve never seen u before so swap photos? Like is that a red flag they are just interested in sex.?

I'm unsure what the highlighted part is referring to exactly but if you haven't met the guy and he's looking for (I assume) NSFW pics I would say that's a definite red flag.

fin12 · 21-01-2021 3:01am

El Sueño wrote: »

I'm unsure what the highlighted part is referring to exactly but if you haven't met the guy and he's looking for (I assume) NSFW pics I would say that's a definite red flag.

No I have meet him before but it’s very early days, but obviously cause of lockdown can’t meet up, like a photo in ur bra or something ?

2 fast · 21-01-2021 8:07am

fin12 wrote: »

Would a guy ask someone who he would consider relationship potential for a picture n I dont mean the like I’ve never seen u before so swap photos? Like is that a red flag they are just interested in sex.?

If you're not comfortable in sending then don't it's really your own boundaries on the matter.

Oink · 21-01-2021 8:24am

The question is do you really know him well enough to trust him with the photos? How confident are you that he isn’t not going to share it with his mates? What if you happen to have a bad breakup? Will you still trust him then? You can’t take them back!!!

Long story short... I wouldn’t!

fin12 · 21-01-2021 8:42am

Oink wrote: »

The question is do you really know him well enough to trust him with the photos? How confident are you that he isn’t not going to share it with his mates? What if you happen to have a bad breakup? Will you still trust him then? You can’t take them back!!!

Long story short... I wouldn’t!

Yes very true, I don’t know him well enough at all to trust him.

Jequ0n · 21-01-2021 9:06am

It doesn’t have any bearing on relationship/ non relationship intentions, so nobody can answer that for you.

I can guarantee you that he will ask for more candid stuff if you send the lame bra one. Personally I’d consider it a compliment that someone wants to have **** to my picture but I guess women sometimes see this differently.

Up to you to decide if you’re comfortable with it

Loveinapril · 21-01-2021 9:18am

If it is early days, then this might be form for him to get photos of girls. I would be concerned about what he would do with the picture after you send it. Once you send it, it isn't yours anymore. Personally, I would wait until I was in a committed relationship and had full trust in my partner's intentions.

YellowLead · 21-01-2021 9:41am

If it’s very early days I wouldn’t send anything with your face in the picture (well in fact in would never send face NSFW pics full stop).
I would imagine that yes it’s just a bit of fun he is after to get him through lockdown - in my experience the ones who are serious tend not to ask for photos, not before you are actually together.
As somebody else said if you are looking for a bit of fun yourself, find it flattering, and are comfortable, fire away, but don’t send anything you wouldn’t want to see on the internet one day and know he’s probably asking lots of girls for same.
Good luck!

fin12 · 21-01-2021 9:48am

YellowLead wrote: »

If it’s very early days I wouldn’t send anything with your face in the picture (well in fact in would never send face NSFW pics full stop).
I would imagine that yes it’s just a bit of fun he is after to get him through lockdown - in my experience the ones who are serious tend not to ask for photos, not before you are actually together.
As somebody else said if you are looking for a bit of fun yourself, find it flattering, and are comfortable, fire away, but don’t send anything you wouldn’t want to see on the internet one day and know he’s probably asking lots of girls for same.
Good luck!

Thanks, ya that was what I was more asking cause I’m looking for a relationship and really not sure about him.

Caranica · 21-01-2021 9:52am

Consider using an app like wickr where you can set it to ban screenshots and for pictures to disappear. Do not use Facebook secret messaging as that allows screenshots.

beauf · 21-01-2021 10:11am

Caranica wrote: »

Consider using an app like wickr where you can set it to ban screenshots and for pictures to disappear. Do not use Facebook secret messaging as that allows screenshots.

You can just take a photo of the phone from another phone. There is no way to stop photos being saved and copied and sent. None.

Jequ0n · 21-01-2021 10:30am

Why would you care if you cannot be identified in the picture?

ManOfMystery · 21-01-2021 11:39am

Jequ0n wrote: »

Why would you care if you cannot be identified in the picture?

Even if they block their face, all it takes is a vindictive person to post up the photos anyway along with a separate face photo (pulled from social media or wherever) and the embarassment will be the same as anyone who sees it will still arrive at the same conclusion.

Best course of action? Don't send photos of yourself partially dressed or nude unless you're 100% comfortable with the risk that someone else beyond the recipient might see them. There's enough horror stories out there of stuff like this happening for everyone to know the risks now - even people who have been in longterm relationships have fallen foul of the likes of revenge porn when things turn sour, never mind sending them to a new guy who the OP barely knows.

beauf · 21-01-2021 11:42am

Jequ0n wrote: »

Why would you care if you cannot be identified in the picture?

If you go to the effort to hide your face. It suggests you shouldn't be sending the photo in the first place.

beauf · 21-01-2021 11:48am

Never put anything in an email or a photo that you wouldn't want on the 9 o clock news. It can all come back to bite you otherwise.

To someone you hardly know. That's asking for trouble. It would raise red flags for me if someone was asking for it.

skallywag · 21-01-2021 11:51am

In my opinion it would be a very silly thing to do at any time OP. Ever.

fin12 · 21-01-2021 11:53am

Ok thanks for all the advice , I won’t be sending one. I’m thinking there’s a good chance this isn’t going to go anywhere.

Smile111 · 21-01-2021 12:08pm

Taeholic · 21-01-2021 6:43pm

fin12 wrote: »

Would a guy ask someone who he would consider relationship potential for a picture n I dont mean the like I’ve never seen u before so swap photos? Like is that a red flag they are just interested in sex.?

Personally I think the fact you are asking the question at all shows that you are not comfortable with it. Something isn't sitting right with you, whether it's the request for photo itself or the guy in question.

Trust your gut I think you already know the answer. If he's serious about you, he will understand your reason not to. If hes not, then you've saved yourself from wasting time on someone that doesn't respect you.

fin12 · 21-01-2021 6:57pm

Taeholic wrote: »

Personally I think the fact you are asking the question at all shows that you are not comfortable with it. Something isn't sitting right with you, whether it's the request for photo itself or the guy in question.

Trust your gut I think you already know the answer. If he's serious about you, he will understand your reason not to. If hes not, then you've saved yourself from wasting time on someone that doesn't respect you.

I think it’s also, I’ve never been asked that before by any guy I dated or even were in a relationship with ? I don’t know is it something to do with lockdown but also my gut is telling me this prob isn’t going to end in a relationship which is what I’m looking for.

Taeholic · 21-01-2021 8:52pm

fin12 wrote: »

I think it’s also, I’ve never been asked that before by any guy I dated or even were in a relationship with ? I don’t know is it something to do with lockdown but also my gut is telling me this prob isn’t going to end in a relationship which is what I’m looking for.

In my online dating experience being asked for photos is common enough, I don't think it has anything to do with lockdown. It would be a different story if he wanted to video chat so he could connect more with you (fully clothed I might add)

His request has made you uncomfortable, it doesn't seem to sit right with you. If you are unsure then you should absolutely not send them. If he's annoyed or pressures you then good riddance.

For what it's worth, I believe if you have uncomfortable feelings or uncertainty this early on then he's not the one for you, you are not the one for him and thats perfectly ok. Everyone ain't for everyone

rainbowtrout · 22-01-2021 12:56am

fin12 wrote: »

I think it’s also, I’ve never been asked that before by any guy I dated or even were in a relationship with ? I don’t know is it something to do with lockdown but also my gut is telling me this prob isn’t going to end in a relationship which is what I’m looking for.

You don't know the guy, you don't owe him anything. Just because he asked for the picture doesn't mean you have to send one. It doesn't sound like he's offering what you want, so why give him this?

fin12 · 22-01-2021 1:38am

Thanks for all the advice, I won’t be sending a picture and am a lot clearer about the situation.

Can a mod please close the thread.

ILoveYourVibes · 22-01-2021 5:47am

fin12 wrote: »

No I have meet him before but it’s very early days, but obviously cause of lockdown can’t meet up, like a photo in ur bra or something ?

Its a red flag.

Don't send anyone any kind of pics like that.

Even if you trust them and even if they are trust worthy....the truth is ..we all press the wrong buttons on our phones sometimes ...or send something we don't mean to ..to the WRONG person.

My advice is don't do it. How would you feel if like three months from now he says ...um sorry but i accidentally sent your photo to the tesco whatsapp group ...IT HAPPENS

Hannibal_Smith · 22-01-2021 8:09am

Mod Note

Thread closed as per OP's request.

Thanks everyone for your help and advice.

HS

Picture and relationship

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