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Jehovah witness friend

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  • 26-11-2020 2:39pm
    #1
    Away With The Fairies
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,077 ✭✭✭


    I done a course last year and still keep in touch with others that were on the course. Mostly because we progressed to a higher level and are on the same course again this year.

    There is one that didn't progress and I have no issue with staying in touch. Messages were mostly just checking up on me because they knew how crap I felt with the pandemic.

    However, lately alot of messages contains Jehovah witnesses material. The course we done wasn't religious and I'm not interested in this type of thing.

    While I am a catholic, a non-practicing catholic, is it a bit hypocritical of me to ask her to stop sending me Jehovah things? She can practice Jehovah witness but not through me.


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    #2
    Loveinapril
    Registered Users Posts: 2,327 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    Why would it be hypocritical? It is totally fine for you to say that you are not interested in receiving messages about religion. Your own religious status doesn't matter.


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    #3
    Away With The Fairies
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,077 ✭✭✭Away With The Fairies


    I think it's hypocritical because I'm non practicing but she does practice her own religion.


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    #4
    eviltwin
    Registered Users Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    Away With The Fairies wrote: »
    I think it's hypocritical because I'm non practicing but she does practice her own religion.

    Not hypocritical at all. You don't want the messages, they are of no relevance to you so she shouldn't send them.


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    #5
    Away With The Fairies
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,077 ✭✭✭Away With The Fairies


    eviltwin wrote: »
    Not hypocritical at all. You don't want the messages, they are of no relevance to you so she shouldn't send them.

    Thanks, I'll send a message to ask her to stop


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    #6
    Dial Hard
    Registered Users Posts: 13,406 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    Away With The Fairies wrote: »
    I think it's hypocritical because I'm non practicing but she does practice her own religion.

    That's still not hypocrisy.

    Just tell her you're not interested in discussing religion and you'd appreciate it if she stopped sending that material


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    #7
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 6,192 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Just ignore the religious messages etc and only reply to the personal messages?

    She'll soon get the hint


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    #8
    Loveinapril
    Registered Users Posts: 2,327 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    [Deleted User] wrote: »
    Just ignore the religious messages etc and only reply to the personal messages?

    She'll soon get the hint

    I doubt it. Witnesses, Mormons and other religions who 'preach' like that feel like they are genuinely doing a good thing informing people about the bible. The OP definitely needs to be clear about their lack of interest in the topic of religion.

    OP, it would be hypocritical if you were sending her religious things but didn't want her sending things back. It is absolutely okay that you say that you aren't interested in religious information.


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    #9
    qwerty13
    Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭qwerty13


    I’d add to LoveinApril’s post by saying that if she ignores your wishes, then block her.


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    #10
    Oink
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 2,151 Mod ✭✭✭✭Oink


    [Deleted User] wrote: »

    She'll soon get the hint

    I don’t think that’s how JWs work...

    Good luck op, I hope I’m wrong and you get to keep your friend.


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    #11
    Graces7
    Registered Users Posts: 32,634 ✭✭✭✭Graces7


    Loveinapril wrote: »
    I doubt it. Witnesses, Mormons and other religions who 'preach' like that feel like they are genuinely doing a good thing informing people about the bible. The OP definitely needs to be clear about their lack of interest in the topic of religion.

    OP, it would be hypocritical if you were sending her religious things but didn't want her sending things back. It is absolutely okay that you say that you aren't interested in religious information.

    That might backfire as it arouses more zeal. Been there, done that . And no need to be unkind.. Just let the correspondence quietly lapse? Leave longer and longer between messages.


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    #12
    Graces7
    Registered Users Posts: 32,634 ✭✭✭✭Graces7


    Away With The Fairies wrote: »
    I done a course last year and still keep in touch with others that were on the course. Mostly because we progressed to a higher level and are on the same course again this year.

    There is one that didn't progress and I have no issue with staying in touch. Messages were mostly just checking up on me because they knew how crap I felt with the pandemic.

    However, lately alot of messages contains Jehovah witnesses material. The course we done wasn't religious and I'm not interested in this type of thing.

    While I am a catholic, a non-practicing catholic, is it a bit hypocritical of me to ask her to stop sending me Jehovah things? She can practice Jehovah witness but not through me.

    Just let the correspondence lapse. Leave longer between replies. If you confront her it will encourage her to try harder with you. They are well trained.


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    #13
    qwerty13
    Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭qwerty13


    I don’t think it is unkind for the OP to clearly express that they don’t wish to receive any more religious material from this acquaintance. Or to block them if this person doesn’t listen to their wishes.


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    #14
    Gregor Samsa
    Registered Users Posts: 8,925 ✭✭✭Gregor Samsa


    Graces7 wrote: »
    That might backfire as it arouses more zeal. Been there, done that . And no need to be unkind.. Just let the correspondence quietly lapse? Leave longer and longer between messages.

    I think it's more unkind to slowly ghost a friend without telling them why, than it is to be up front and say that you want to remain friends, but you do not want to receive religious material.


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    #15
    Thelonious Monk
    Registered Users Posts: 13,811 ✭✭✭✭Thelonious Monk


    Why would you want to be friends with one of these nutters?


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    #16
    Graces7
    Registered Users Posts: 32,634 ✭✭✭✭Graces7


    qwerty13 wrote: »
    I don’t think it is unkind for the OP to clearly express that they don’t wish to receive any more religious material from this acquaintance. Or to block them if this person doesn’t listen to their wishes.

    MY response was not re it being unkind. It is that from experiences with others of this persuasion they are trained to intensify their teachings to reluctant people .

    If the OP wants to keep the relationship then she may need to accept that there may be lapses or intensification . It is the person's mission in life to convert.

    Just my opinion/experience.

    Entirely the OPs choice... Sincere good luck whichever way you choose of course.


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    #17
    qwerty13
    Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭qwerty13


    Graces7 wrote: »
    MY response was not re it being unkind. It is that from experiences with others of this persuasion they are trained to intensify their teachings to reluctant people .

    If the OP wants to keep the relationship then she may need to accept that there may be lapses or intensification . It is the person's mission in life to convert.

    Just my opinion/experience.

    Entirely the OPs choice... Sincere good luck whichever way you choose of course.

    And it is possible that the OP was identified as a candidate for being sent religious material as they were having a very hard time with the pandemic.

    You said this “And no need to be unkind.. Just let the correspondence quietly lapse?” - my point was that it would not be unkind of the OP to clearly state their wishes, and block the person if their wishes are ignored. I’d disagree strongly that the OP standing up for themselves in this regard might be unkind.


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    #18
    Away With The Fairies
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,077 ✭✭✭Away With The Fairies


    Thelonious Monk wrote: »
    Why would you want to be friends with one of these nutters?

    I didn't know they were a jehovah witness until these messages. I just want to be nice about it and not be racist towards them either. I'll take the advice above and tell them I'm not interested with their information.


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    #19
    qwerty13
    Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭qwerty13


    Nothing remotely racist about it OP!

    I’d have no problem saying that I just wasn’t interested in their religious guff, whether it was Jehovah’s, Catholic, druids, crystals, black, brown, white, someone from my road or the other side of the world.

    The point is that you’re not comfortable with them sending you this information - but to be fair to them, they don’t know that until you say it to them.

    I personally think it’s overstepping the mark even if you haven’t said it, but I’d give them a chance by making clear that it is not something that you want. If they continued to overstep my boundaries though, I’d tell them why and block them.


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    #20
    ztoical
    Registered Users Posts: 4,788 ✭✭✭ztoical


    OP just be upfront that you've no interest in discussing anything related to religion, if they aren't able to respect that then tell them you will no longer remain in contact. There is no need to ghost people or try any underhand approach. I've a friend from college who is Mormon and we get on great with no religious talk or push so its not true that every JW, Mormon etc have a zeal to convert people - yes some do but I've also had hard sell from Catholic friends - just be blunt, you've no interest in religion and if someone can't respect your wishes then tell them it's best you stop contact with them. There's nothing hypocritical about it, its a matter of respect.


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    #21
    Gregor Samsa
    Registered Users Posts: 8,925 ✭✭✭Gregor Samsa


    Thelonious Monk wrote: »
    Why would you want to be friends with one of these nutters?

    We have a JW guy in work. Genuinely one of the nicest people you could ever meet. Friendly, kind, helpful, chilled. No one has a bad thing to say about him.

    He was bringing in copies of The Watchtower and other pamphlets and leaving them in the canteen. HR asked him to stop, as it was against company policy, and he did without any fuss.


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    #22
    Dial Hard
    Registered Users Posts: 13,406 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    Away With The Fairies wrote: »
    I didn't know they were a jehovah witness until these messages. I just want to be nice about it and not be racist towards them either. I'll take the advice above and tell them I'm not interested with their information.

    It wasn't hypocrisy not to have any interest in hearing about their religion and it's not racist either. Not really sure where you got either of those ideas.

    You're seriously overthinking this, OP. Just politely but firmly tell them you're not interested and you'd appreciate if they don't bring it up again. That's literally all you need to do.


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    #23
    OptimusTractor
    Registered Users Posts: 1,956 ✭✭✭OptimusTractor


    Away With The Fairies wrote: »
    I think it's hypocritical because I'm non practicing but she does practice her own religion.

    Hypocrisy would be her not hearing about your beliefs while constantly pushing her beliefs on you.


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    #24
    Tork
    Registered Users Posts: 3,270 ✭✭✭Tork


    Don't forget Jehovah's Witnesses are used to having people tell them that they're not interested. I'm always polite to them but I'm sure they get plenty of people who don't answer the door or are rude. Just tell her nicely that you're not interested and leave it at that.


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    #25
    o1s1n
    Registered Users Posts: 34,517 ✭✭✭✭o1s1n
    Master of the Universe


    Send her back links to articles on www.jwfacts.com showing how her religion is actually a doomsday cult that under a veil of smiles and happiness, tears families apart via shunning and allows children to die and become martyrs rather than accept blood transfusions.

    She'll soon get the hint!


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    #26
    Dial Hard
    Registered Users Posts: 13,406 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    o1s1n wrote: »
    Send her back links to articles on www.jwfacts.com showing how her religion is actually a doomsday cult that under a veil of smiles and happiness, tears families apart via shunning and allows children to die and become martyrs rather than accept blood transfusions.

    She'll soon get the hint!

    Or just politely tell her you're not interested rather than getting into a tit-for-tat that could well be interpreted as an invitation to treat.


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    #27
    SouthWesterly
    Registered Users Posts: 6,493 ✭✭✭SouthWesterly


    Jws don't mix with non Jws except to convert them. You're a future member, or at least that's how they will see it.

    I got a letter from the local jw on my town this week.
    Was worrying that they had my family name on the envelope and house name in the address. Anyway I will ignore it..


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    #28
    tara73
    Registered Users Posts: 2,341 ✭✭✭tara73


    SouthWesterly wrote: »
    Jws don't mix with non Jws except to convert them. You're a future member, or at least that's how they will see it.

    this. I would strongly advise to cut contact OP. Tell her as advised, you are not interested in this religious infos and stop contact. Don't feel bad about it.


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    #29
    Mam of 4
    Registered Users Posts: 21,835 ✭✭✭✭Mam of 4


    To say JW's only interact with non JW people only as a way to try to convert them isn't true ime . I know lots of JW's and we just don't discuss religion at all .

    OP , just be honest and let her know you don't appreciate her sending you unwanted links/pamphlets, whatever , and you dont want to receive any more from her , that would be my advice .


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    #30
    SouthWesterly
    Registered Users Posts: 6,493 ✭✭✭SouthWesterly


    Mam of 4 wrote: »
    To say JW's only interact with non JW people only as a way to try to convert them isn't true ime . I know lots of JW's and we just don't discuss religion at all .

    OP , just be honest and let her know you don't appreciate her sending you unwanted links/pamphlets, whatever , and you dont want to receive any more from her , that would be my advice .

    I knew people who were ex jw. Even family members who were still involved were forbidden to have anything to do with them. They all eventually got out.


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    #31
    Loveinapril
    Registered Users Posts: 2,327 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    SouthWesterly wrote: »
    Jws don't mix with non Jws except to convert them. You're a future member, or at least that's how they will see it.

    This isn't true.

    People are people. If the OP's friend is a fanatic, that's a different story but to say a statement like the above is just a lie.


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